If the real father is on the ball, what is the stepdad's role?

bigirl

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Having been raised by evil step parents I would say the role of step parents is to make a childs life as miserable as possible :hmm:
 

onyxfemme

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The stepdad's role would be to be on the "ball" for the child too.
I really wish my husband would post:yes:
We dont even use the term "step-dad" in my home....Just like when I was growing up, I didnt know my dad wasnt my biological father until I was like 13. And then one of my hating aunts slipped up.

Women dont fuck w/ a man if he wont treat your children as his own:hmm:
 

destrehan

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The stepdad's role would be to be on the "ball" for the child too.
I really wish my husband would post:yes:
We dont even use the term "step-dad" in my home....Just like when I was growing up, I didnt know my dad wasnt my biological father until I was like 13. And then one of my hating aunts slipped up.

Women dont fuck w/ a man if he wont treat your children as his own:hmm:
well my kids know who their father is.
 

Eva Hornae

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BGOL Investor
The stepdad's role would be to be on the "ball" for the child too.
I really wish my husband would post:yes:
We dont even use the term "step-dad" in my home....Just like when I was growing up, I didnt know my dad wasnt my biological father until I was like 13. And then one of my hating aunts slipped up.

Women dont fuck w/ a man if he wont treat your children as his own:hmm:

exactly!
 

Eva Hornae

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BGOL Investor
stick to the question.

didn't I? :hmm:

Anyway, yes the step-father's role is to be a father-figure in the child/ren's life as though he IS their father!

I grew up with a step-father and he treated me as if I was his child!


good enough for you sir?
 

onyxfemme

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as a father i would have a problem with another man going around acting like my kids are his own. he doesn't need to play father if i'm in my kid's life.

So you would wannt a guy to be around your kids acting like they dont exist?
 

Iron

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Having been raised by evil step parents I would say the role of step parents is to make a childs life as miserable as possible :hmm:

:smh::smh:

You need a hug sis:smh:

Cosign

as a father i would have a problem with another man going around acting like my kids are his own. he doesn't need to play father if i'm in my kid's life.


:confused: Damn shame that you feel that way.

That's kinda immature too.


well my kids know who their father is.

Obviously. kinda hard to forget.

The man that I call my father. Is actually my stepfather. He's been raising me since i was 1 yrs old.

Ain't no arguing that I'am not his child.

I haven't met another man that can match him.

He still doesn't replace my real pops both of them have their own seperate identities.
 

onyxfemme

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:smh::smh:



Cosign




:confused: Damn shame that you feel that way.

That's kinda immature too.




Obviously. kinda hard to forget.

The man that I call my father. Is actually my stepfather. He's been raising me since i was 1 yrs old.

Ain't no arguing that I'am not his child.

I haven't met another man that can match him.

He still doesn't replace my real pops both of them have their own seperate identities.

Come here let me give you some sugar**MWAUH**
 

destrehan

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:smh::smh:



Cosign




:confused: Damn shame that you feel that way.

That's kinda immature too.




Obviously. kinda hard to forget.

The man that I call my father. Is actually my stepfather. He's been raising me since i was 1 yrs old.

Ain't no arguing that I'am not his child.

I haven't met another man that can match him.

He still doesn't replace my real pops both of them have their own seperate identities.
if you know your pops why the hell you callin another man father?
 

destrehan

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So do mine...Now what?
they shouldn't be callin another man "DADDY"


and no i don't want anyone ignoring my kids, i just don't want him actin like he's their father. that level of involvement is not necessary as long as i'm breathing and walking.
 

ladyscorpio

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they shouldn't be callin another man "DADDY"


and no i don't want anyone ignoring my kids, i just don't want him actin like he's their father. that level of involvement is not necessary as long as i'm breathing and walking.

Why are you asking for answers and yet when they are given you choose to remain closed to them. :dunno:
 

destrehan

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Why are you asking for answers and yet when they are given you choose to remain closed to them. :dunno:
the women are showin no respect for the biologican fathers of their kids. and they aren't answering the question anyway. i want to know what they feel a stepdad's role is if the real dad is active. do these women want their kids calling another woman "mom"?
 

Iron

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well i plan on raising mine as much as possible. no other cat is gonna be able to say he "raised" mine.

the women are showin no respect for the biologican fathers of their kids. and they aren't answering the question anyway. i want to know what they feel a stepdad's role is if the real dad is active. do these women want their kids calling another woman "mom"?

:yes: I completely understand where you're coming from.

And I agree.

We got into a debate about this in the chat.

I don't call my stepfather daddy,dad or pops.

I call him by his first name.

He just receives the title of father because he is my father.

I'd call him my father even if my biological pops played an important part in raising me.
 

destrehan

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:yes: I completely understand where you're coming from.

And I agree.

We got into a debate about this in the chat.

I don't call my stepfather daddy,dad or pops.

I call him by his first name.

He just receives the title of father because he is my father.

I'd call him my father even if my biological pops played an important part in raising me.
glad you understand me. and i understand you too. the thought of hearing my sons call another man what they call me is vomit-inducing. my boys are with me half the time, so no reason for that.
 

onyxfemme

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:yes: I completely understand where you're coming from.

And I agree.

We got into a debate about this in the chat.

I don't call my stepfather daddy,dad or pops.

I call him by his first name.

He just receives the title of father because he is my father.

I'd call him my father even if my biological pops played an important part in raising me.

Same thing w/ me and my kids....I call my dad by his name and my children call my husband by his name.
 

onyxfemme

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they shouldn't be callin another man "DADDY"


and no i don't want anyone ignoring my kids, i just don't want him actin like he's their father. that level of involvement is not necessary as long as i'm breathing and walking.

If they shouldnt be calling another man daddy then why arent you w/ the mom of your children?
 

Iron

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It's different for everybody.

I don't like calling anyone Dad.

It's crazy becuse that's what naturally comes out when i speak to my biological father.

I cringe everytime I say it.

When I was younger I remember my parents asked me to start calling my stepfather dad.

I wasn't doing that shit.

I love him to death but it just didn't feel right.

But i am adding his last name to my last name.

To show respect.

I had a converstion with my bio' father about it.

He understood what i was saying.

But i couldn't care less about what he thought.

It wasn't about him.
 

Iron

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he knew yall would like that. that's why he said it. peep his last response to me.

silly girl.

nah ain't have nothing to do with the women.

I'am speakin' from personal experience.

Why wouldn't you want him to treat your kids like they're his own?
 

debrookcaturlyn

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the women are showin no respect for the biologican fathers of their kids. and they aren't answering the question anyway. i want to know what they feel a stepdad's role is if the real dad is active. do these women want their kids calling another woman "mom"?

I OVERstand your question....and the reason you are not satisfied with the responses is because you should not be askin it to women. It is NOT their place or position to dictate or state how a MAN should be a MAN. It's not about being a "dad" or a "stepdad"....it's about being a MAN. Now my $.02 on your question...I am happilly divorced with 2(boy)children. I am absolutely "on the ball". Any man coming into my X wifes life only real role is to focus on his relationship with her and be another good male example to my children. He has absolutely NO disciplinary authority(that is for my x wife and I). If there is a situation that requires more discipline than she can handle...CALL ME AND PUT THE CHILD/CHILDREN ON THE PHONE!! That is how on the ball I am. He is NOT and will NOT ever be addressed as a stepdad(unless I die). He is the ****** that is now fucking their mother and that is what is "role" is so that biyatch is happy and leaves me the fuck alone.:yes: And yes only 40+ posts and I have an opinion :eek:
 

bigirl

anti- voluntary ignorance
BGOL Investor
It's different for everybody.

I don't like calling anyone Dad.

It's crazy becuse that's what naturally comes out when i speak to my biological father.

I cringe everytime I say it.

When I was younger I remember my parents asked me to start calling my stepfather dad.

I wasn't doing that shit.

I love him to death but it just didn't feel right.

But i am adding his last name to my last name.

To show respect.

I had a converstion with my bio' father about it.

He understood what i was saying.

But i couldn't care less about what he thought.

It wasn't about him.

Mine is opposite. Even tho I didn't meet my real father til I was 28 I took his last name, my real name and got rid of step parents name.
 

followup

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nah ain't have nothing to do with the women.

I'am speakin' from personal experience.

Why wouldn't you want him to treat your kids like they're his own?

Thanks for quoting him Iron.
@ OP: my comment comes from the fact that a 19 year old has more insight into your situation than you do. You had children with a woman who you are no longer with and there is a new man playing a significant role in your children's lives, and you're over here getting huffy about what they call him. Last I looked a sperm donor is not the same as a father/daddy/dad. If he is putting in time/money/love with your kids and they call him dad you don't have anything to say about it. Do as much as you can for your kids and make sure they know that you are their biological dad. It's simple
 

Buttnaked

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The stepdad's role would be to be on the "ball" for the child too.
I really wish my husband would post:yes:
We dont even use the term "step-dad" in my home....Just like when I was growing up, I didnt know my dad wasnt my biological father until I was like 13. And then one of my hating aunts slipped up.

Women dont fuck w/ a man if he wont treat your children as his own:hmm:

say word!

both of my bio's are assholes. one's dead & hopefully @ peace, and the other one is working hard at being the pussy that he is. pops hasn't worked for a living since '88. no SSI. no disability. no income. NO INCOME! WTF!

how the hell do you respect a father like that? oddly, i did for years. oops. fortunately, my nut ass mother remarried when i was 13. that's my dad. i do refer to him as my stepdad, because i can be retardedly honest/anal about certain shit, and i call him by his first name, but that's our relationship.

i love my stepdad. he's 1 of the greatest humans i have ever had the fortune to know.

i don't believe in half siblings either. stupid shit. i don't half love either of my sisters. again, WTF!

i know i ain't a woman, but FI...

the role of any adult in a child's life is to provide them w/the tools to be a positive human and teach them the value of making wise decisions w/their lives.
 
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Eva Hornae

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say word!

both of my bio's are assholes. one's dead & hopefully @ peace, and the other one is working hard at being the pussy that he is. pops hasn't worked for a living since '88. no SSI. no disability. no income. NO INCOME! WTF!

how the hell do you respect a father like that? oddly, i did for years. oops. fortunately, my nut ass mother remarried when i was 13. that's my dad. i do refer to him as my stepdad, because i can be retardedly honest/anal about certain shit, and i call him by his first name, but that's our relationship.

i love my stepdad. he's 1 of the greatest humans i have ever had the fortune to know.

i don't believe in half siblings either. stupid shit. i don't half love either of my sisters. again, WTF!

i know i ain't a woman, but FI...

the role of any adult in a child's life is to provide them w/the tools to be a positive human and teach them the value of making wise decisions w/their lives.
:yes::yes:
 
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