A while back when I was a young 'un, I used to do lots of business contracts with a good friend of mine. Dude was like an older brother to me. His girl at the time was about the finest chick I'd ever seen. High yella, thin frame with a booty so perfect I can't even explain it. I brought my cousin over his house and warned him that this chick was super bad. He was like, whateva, I ain't no rookie. When he saw this chick, I thought his eyes were gonna buck out his head, lol.
Anyway, my friend broke up with this girl. I was working on some artwork for a CD she was wanting to put out. I asked him if he wanted me to finish working on it, and he said it was fine.
So I'm calling her working out the details and she starts talking kind of freaky, stuff she likes sexually and whatever. We start talking almost every day just on friendship level with a little freakiness thrown in.
One night, I'm spending the night at my aunt's house. she calls me about midnight. She's saying how she's going to the club to pick up someone cause she needs to get fucked and how she doesn't like picking up dudes in clubs. I'm like half asleep so I'm just like well, you gotta do what you gotta do. Then she says the words I will never, ever forget...
"Nigga, you gonna come handle your business or what?"
Fam, a nigga jump out the bed and clothes just hop off the floor on a nigga. I don't even remember putting them on, all I know I look up and I'm fully dressed with keys in hand.
I go to get in my car and realize that my aunt's car is parked behind mine and I'm blocked in. I go wake up my uncle and explain the situation. My unc is like, let's get that shit moved nephew, let me find your aunt's keys.
Man, we're looking all over the house. Don't want to wake my aunt up to ask her to move her car so I can go hit. She would have clowned us for years. While looking for the keys, I keep thinking about my homeboy, how he took a young brotha under his wing and brought me up and helped me make paper, taught me the business. My uncle comes in with the keys he finally found and I'm like, I can't do it.
Fam, I call her back and tell her I'm not coming. She's like you don't know what you just passed up.
The next afternoon I go over to my homeboys' house to work on this contract. When I walk in, he's like son, my ex gal came knockin on my door about 2 in the morning. He said she took him upstairs and fucked him nonstop for four hours. He was like, she did every fucking thing in the world, he had never experienced no shit like that in his life.
I wanted to throw up.
I still think about that shit and it's been 12 years. My and my homeboy are still friends but I still sometimes wonder how I passed that shit up.
THAT GIRL WAS FUCKING FINE FAM!!!
Oh well...