whats the DUMBEST thing youve ever done 4 some pussy? (pt. 1)

Man I got a few of these. First one was back in my freshman year in college. I was 18 and met this thick lil chick that was 17 that lived off campus. I was in summer school and really didn't know much of shit about the chick but one omornin she called me like 8 am and told me I could get some pussy if I came over. Skipped class and went over there dbd found out she lived on Maxwell Air Force Base.

Pulled up to the gate and this big ass MP with muscles all on his neck asked where I was goin. Didn't say which house because I didn't know I just knew which street. Got there and she told me to park across the street so I did and then I went in.

Get inside and she led me to the sofa and within a few im pushing in the guts. Bout 10 min go by and I hear the car garage go up and its her pops. Im tryin to go out the front door but the bitch push me down the hall into her room and close the door. She threw on a robe and went to meet him. I heard him ask why she wasn't dressed and she said she had just got out the shower. I look over at the night stand and its the big ass MP... a pic of her dad.

Its the middle of July and im in a closet sweating like a hebrew slave with a lamp in my hand ready to knock the shit out this nigga and run if I had to. Door come open and im ready but its her... pops in the bathroom taking a shit and she push me out the front door. I got off that base quick as fuck and the bitch actually tried to get me to come over there again after that.


Next story...

This one was real just dumb as fuck on my part but a fine bitch and a nigga bein horny are a bad combination. I had been chatting up this chick from blackplanet for about two weeks. To make a long story short I drove from Atlanta to Fort Valley to pick the bitch up and brought her back to my crib to spend the weekend. She was from Chicago and wanted to get out and see the city. Took her out to a few spots and we fucked periodically the whole weekend. Shawty cooked and cleaned the whole time she was there though and was cool as fuck. Chick didn't even want to go back to school but I took her back that sunday. When she got a car she was comin to stay with me every weekend for about 3 months straight and she was a legitimate 9 out of 10 in looks and personality. After about the third week she admitted she had a dude she was suppose to be engaged to. Towards the end of the third month chick told me she was pregnant and just kinda disappeared. I never hit her raw but last I heard from her she moced back to the chi... but that shit does make me wonder sometimes.


Last story...

This shit was kinda funny but fucked up. Met this chick in the mall... 26 but openly admitted she lived at home with her parents til she got herself together. She called me on the late night told me to cum over. I get there and she tell me to park on the opposite side not to block the driveway... im like cool. She told me not to knock or ring the door bell just come to the side door. Shit didn't even dawn on me at first but when I got in her room and she cut the tv up im thinkin this grown ass bitch had to sneak me in the house. I called her on it and she say her dad is real protective. I made it known I was strapped and I wasn't hiding from bL one im too old for that shit now. She say cool lets do what you came to do.

Im gettin undressed and notice this bitch got a kid sleep on the edge of the bed. She said just stroke her soft because the bed squeak and she didn't wanna wake the kid up. im like fuck it im here im gonna do it. Her mom knock on the door dbd tryin to turn the handle and im like ain't this a bitch. She told me to stop and didn't even respond I guess so her mom would think she was sleep. For all the hassle she swallowed my nut before she snook me out.

Ok one more but short. Met a chick at a lil get together my upstairs neighbor had in birmingham. He was a slim shady type white dude had a fine black chick. long story short he introduced me to his chick friend and I flirted with her a bit but was drunk so I bounced back downstairs. soon as I lock the door he knocking talkin bout ol girl wanted you to spend the night with her. im thinkin damn I don't have a rubber and he don't use em so what am I to do.... I remember I fucked this one chick a couple of days ago and didn't want to leave the rubber at her crib so I wrap it in a napkin and bring it home but had forgot to throw it away.. well im sure you know where this is going from there...
 
Drove from Birmingham to Detroit to fuck a broad I met on black planet.
Man, I swear to god homeboy... This was back in 2007. I drove from morning to the next morning. It was february, icey, and cold than a motherfucker. When I got there I had to get a room for two nights which was $140ish... I only saw this chick for 2 hours in which for only 45 minutes of that I fucked.

I don't know what came over me... she was looking so thick on blackplanet and just had to have it... I wasn't disappointed but she wasn't what I thought it was going to be like in person. This chick was a freak, she was in this biking gang/clan full of other freaks also ...

:smh: Shame On Me. :smh:
wow :eek:!!!,,, this kat was thirsty!!!,,, nobody in this thread can top this shit,,,, gotdamn!
 
Nigga you stole a bike to get some pussy? Only people around my way I know that steal bikes to go places is crackheads.

Shit I did the same thing in 10th grade.

Except I walked 4 miles to the girls house.:smh:

I stole the bike to get home :lol:

And didn't even fuck :angry::angry:

The girl's mom came home saw me, and had me help her move furniture for about 30 minutes before I said "fuck this shit:angry:" and left:lol:

I asked to borrow a bike from a twelve year old and PROMISED I'd bring the shit back.

Never did.

Still feel bad about that shit.

I owe that nigga a bike:lol:
 
Back In High School I piled 7 bitches In a Dodge Neon for this party me and my nicca's threw @ my partna's house...
I was so fuckin ripe to get pulled over(I had @ least an ounce of weed, a pistol and 3,4 bottles of that old man aka Paul Mason.....:smh: Shit looked like a clown car...:lol:) My homie was from Cleveland and his mom's would go up there every weekend.... So that ='d a free alternative to a nasty ass hooker motel.......




Everybody fucked sumthin that night and I left them hoes In the mornin..I jumped out a 2nd story window and landed In a patch of bushes,Brushed myself off and Got In my car and bounced the fuck out..Then I had to face all them bitches Monday morning @ school..:lol: I acted like I didn't remember.

Shit was extremely DUMB.​
 
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c/s
 
On my senior year, one of my past associates claimed he had 2 freaks, and they wanted to chill with me/him and they were too drunk to drive home. The story already had me in ???, however, the loyal friend I am, I went on with the bullshit. I go get these bitches from the club, went to their place, and drank a little bit more. To myself, I think its about to go down, and shit. So I start taking off the chick I was fuckin with clothes...gradually. Next thing I know, the bitch my associate was fucking with start talking about their boyfriends *plural* are about to get off and we got to leave.... A week later, I find out that them bitches didn't have anyone, and the girl lied because she didn't want to fuck with my associate. Shit made me hot because I spent gas, and drank on these bitches........

Another one.

I drove 2 hours to fuck this white bitch....but that sht was kinda worth it.... *ended up making money off that chick*
 
Told the bitch I loved her and didn't mean it.

I didn't even mean to say it, one day I had trip the girl up at school, and she ended up hurting her foot, then later on that day she walked up to me all limping and shit, and she said something to me and pointed at her foot. I didn't hear her what she said cuz I had headphones on, so jokingly I said "I'm sorry......I love you" then she walked away with a big ass Kool-Aid smile on her face, and at that point I realized I might have made a big mistake. That was before I knew how strong those 3 words can be. The next day, she all smiles and giggles at me and calling me baby and cute little nicknames and all that donkey shit, hugging me and lettin me grab her booty (which was pretty nice). So she was throwin' it at me, so I had no choice but to hit it out the park. Then after I hit it, she started getting mad clingy and jealous when I talked to other girls. She was cock-juggling thundercunt hoe anyway, she was fucking a new dude by the next week. But anyway ever since then I've never said those words to another bitch I didn't really love again.

Now everytime a bitch say she love me, I just say "........oh word?...........cool.....aight.......uh bye?" or if I want to hit it, I'll give her the "I'm no good, I'm a bad guy" story.



:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
 
Started Fuckin a Bitch wit a bangin ass body...... Then i started to smell something funny.......... I recognised this smell before...It was the smell of stank ass pussy....The problem here is that I kept fuckin cause i hadn't fucked in a miinute.....
:lol::smh::smh::puke:

This shit happened 2 yrs ago alright...if it ever happened again tht bitch would have to go, cause i got my own crib now, and ain't no bitch stankin up my crib.:smh:
 
paid 19.99 for onlinebootycall.com :smh:

but the pussy i got off of there was primo:dance:

now i'm cursed with this fat bitch attack as of late.
 
Took a 3 hour bus ride one way, on Christmas Eve, to go give my "girlfriend" a present.
She got me nothing in return, refused to even kiss me, and made me leave.
That's a 6 hour, Christmas Eve trip for nothing. I never hit it.



Took a bus from South LA to Watts to take a bitch a rose. Got banged on by some crips, and got no pussy in return.


Took a freshman bitch out to eat 4 times in college, while broke, to nice restaurants, because I thought thats what "she was used to". Never hit it.
 
Took a 3 hour bus ride one way, on Christmas Eve, to go give my "girlfriend" a present.
She got me nothing in return, refused to even kiss me, and made me leave.
That's a 6 hour, Christmas Eve trip for nothing. I never hit it.



Took a bus from South LA to Watts to take a bitch a rose. Got banged on by some crips, and got no pussy in return.


Took a freshman bitch out to eat 4 times in college, while broke, to nice restaurants, because I thought thats what "she was used to". Never hit it.

:hmm::smh::smh::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
 
1984 - In high school rode a 10 speed 6 miles for pussy but didn't get it.

1986 - 18 yrs old (in the Army) 24yr old soldier came to my room with just a robe on. I start kissing her and she take my dick out. I get the head in and she tells me to stop. I'm on top of her with just the head of my dick in her pussy, not knowing if I should stop or slide it in. I stop and pull it out and she tells me we need to get a hotel room. I'm like WTF! I should have just kept going, cause we never ever came close to fucking again.

1991 - Use to live in Lake Charles, LA and met this chic through a friend. I take this chic to a nice restaurant and back to her place. Nothing. I spend quality time with this chic for weeks, treating her like royalty and shit! She invites me over to her place. When I get there, she has on noting but a robe. I'm having flash backs of my Army days and just getting the head in.....NOT THIS TIME BUDDY!!! I eat this chics pussy and she busts a nut on my chin. I'm pulling my dick out to fuck and she tells me she is tired and ready to go to sleep. Walks me to the door and tells me she will talk to me tomorrow. I never heard from that bitch again!

1993 - stole my sister's new car to go meet this chic so we could go somewhere and fuck. My sister had a big ass brand new caddy her husband had just bought her. Get to the chics sister's place and her moms and 3 sister's car won't start. I end up taking the whole family to there house some 20 miles away. They pile up in my sis's new WHITE caddy, and their fucking shoes were muddy. Instead of fucking, I dropped ole girl off with her folks and spent the rest of the time cleaning my sis's car. Luckily my sister had went with her husband out of town. (He drives 18 wheelers)

I've got too many to tell. Pussy will make you do some stupid shit.:(
 
Took a 3 hour bus ride one way, on Christmas Eve, to go give my "girlfriend" a present.
She got me nothing in return, refused to even kiss me, and made me leave.
That's a 6 hour, Christmas Eve trip for nothing. I never hit it.



Took a bus from South LA to Watts to take a bitch a rose. Got banged on by some crips, and got no pussy in return.


Took a freshman bitch out to eat 4 times in college, while broke, to nice restaurants, because I thought thats what "she was used to". Never hit it.

Just give up homie, fucking bitches aint for everybody.
 
Took a 3 hour bus ride one way, on Christmas Eve, to go give my "girlfriend" a present.
She got me nothing in return, refused to even kiss me, and made me leave.
That's a 6 hour, Christmas Eve trip for nothing. I never hit it.

damn sounded like she was expecting company
 
Back In High School I piled 7 bitches In a Dodge Neon for this party me and my nicca's threw @ my partna's house...
I was so fuckin ripe to get pulled over(I had @ least an ounce of weed, a pistol and 3,4 bottles of that old man aka Paul Mason.....:smh: Shit looked like a clown car...:lol:) My homie was from Cleveland and his mom's would go up there every weekend.... So that ='d a free alternative to a nasty ass hooker motel.......




Everybody fucked sumthin that night and I left them hoes In the mornin..I jumped out a 2nd story window and landed In a patch of bushes,Brushed myself off and Got In my car and bounced the fuck out..Then I had to face all them bitches Monday morning @ school..:lol: I acted like I didn't remember.

Shit was extremely DUMB.​


:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
 
Don't remember if it was the 9th or the 10th grade,but....

I hooked school and the neighborhood tramp was also home...as was her elderly mother.We had fucked before with her mother in the house...

So I am climbing thru her first floor window,as I had done before.
She comes running over and says to get away because her mother had called the cops.Evidently the mother had seen me and thought I was a burglar.

So I haul ass...several blocks away,a patrol car pulls in front of me...and behind me another.

So instead of fucking the afternoon away,I got to sit in a police station.
Because one of the cops was a neighbor and knew my parents...they allowed me to walk home,and he was gonna tell my parents later.
So I was in deep trouble on several fronts...

I got even with cop...I fucked one of his daughters.
 
drove from san antonio, texas to Comfort (in another county, no black people) on a suspended drivers' license at 1 in the morning to meet this chick i met in a club. An hour drive each way..I did smash when i got there. In fact i broke her off 2 or 3 times after that night. but man was i a dumb motherfucker for takin' that risk. :smh:
 
While in the service, met this white chick whose ex-husband(black) was still enlisted. She stayed in the area after they got divorced cause they had a kid. Anyway, spotted her working at the BX and since red beans and rice didn't miss her, neither could I. We start kickin it and 1 day I'm at her apartment making my beat down rounds (she was 2nd stop) and her ex shows up. Before I knew it, the bish had me on some R. Kelly type shit all in the closet hiding and shit. Somehow this mofo knew something was up and went looking thru the whole spot. When he finally made it to my closet, he opened the door and my dumb ass automatically gave him the head nod and was like "what's up". Now mind you, this is happening while I'm all twisted up in this tight assed closet. He didn't say or do nothing else, he just left. Turns out this punk was military police and that's where the bitch-assness starts. He put word out to damn near the whole force, and these bastards started pulling me over for anything they could think of. I never got pulled over on the yard before this shit went down, then that changed to almost every other day. Come on man, over some pussy?:smh: Serious bitch move, but I'm still kicking myself til this day for getting in that damn closet.
 
actually try to impress a chick instead of ignoring them

Thats what i try to tell these dumb asses at my job. They hate on me because these hoes they be impressing I don't pay them bitches no mind and they get mad at me when these chicks be laughing and joking with me instead of them. :smh::smh:
 
DAMN YALL DUDES IS FUNNY :lol::lol: OK HERE'S MY STORY

I MET THIS SUPER SEXY CHICK ON MYSPACE :yes: BUT SHE LIVED IN MICHIGAN I LIVE IN THE CHI, WE TALKING ONLINE/PHONE SHE WAS PLAYING WIT HER PUSS ON THE TELE AND ALL THAT ISH. SO A NINJA COP THAT GREYHOUND TICKET! :dance::smh: BUT THAT WAS A BAD MOVE! THE BUS DRIVER WAS NEW TO THE ROUTE THAT WENT TO DETROIT AND I WOULD HAVE TO GET OFF AND TRANSFER TO A NEW BUS, BUT HE FORGOT TO TELL US THAT! SO ME AND THIS OTHER BLK DUDE GET'S STUCK IN THIS HICK TOWN!! FULL OF CRACKAS 1 BLK WORKER AND SHIT!! I CALL OH GIRL LIKE LISTEN IM STUCK THE BUS DRIVER DIDN'T TELL US TO GET OFF TO TRANSFER COME PICK ME UP! SHE LIKE NAH! :smh:RENT A CAR DON'T U GOT A CREDIT CARD!!! IM LIKE :angry::angry: THEN IM LIKE WELL ILL JUST TAKE THE NEXT BUS BACK CAUSE IM STUCK IN SOME HICK TOWN SO SHE LIKE WELL WHERE U AT? I TOLD HER SHE WAS LIKE THAT'S 50 MILES FROM HERE AND MY D.L IS EXPIRED! :smh:

BUT SHE DECIDES TO COME PICK ME UP SO WHILE WAITING FOR HER TO COME SCOOP ME AND DUDE GET SUM DRINKS AND GRUB. NEXT THING U KNOW A MIRAH CAREY LATINO BITCH COME WALKING IN WITH ANOTHER THICK MAMACITA :eek::eek: ME AND OH BOY LIKE TODAY MAY NOT BE A BAD DAY AFTERALL!! :dance: SUM OTHER BLK DUDES COME IN AND START PLAYING POOL AND START TALKIN TO THEM CHICKS! BOUT A HOUR PASS I CALL OH GIRL LIKE WHERE U AT? SHE JUST GOT OUT OF THE SHOWER!!! WTF! SO BY THIS TIME OH BOY IS DRUNK! CANT HANDLE HIS LIQ. THE DUDES LEAVE BUT THE CHICKS IS STILL THERE. WE GO IN THERE ON SUM MACK MODE ISH LIKE WHAT UP! THEY GIVIN NINJA'S SUM PLAY LIKE WHAT UP LET'S GO TO THE MO! :eek: IM LIKE NAH YALL JUST TALKIN YOU GOTTA BE LET A NINJA SEE SUMIN SHE POP OUT THEM NICE ASS TITTIES HAD A NIG ON STONE MOUNTAIN! SO I GET ON SUM GANGSTA ISH AND START FEELIN ON THEM JOINTS (THE POOL ROOM IS A SEEPRATE ROOM) FEELIN ON BOTH THEY CATS AND ALL... (BLINDERS CAME ON DIDN'T KNOW WHERE OH BOY WAS) IM LIKE OK YALL BOUT IT WHERE THE MO AT THEY LIKE DOWN THE STREET.

I GET OH BOY LIKE HOW MUCH U GOT ON THIS ROOM? HE LIKE HALF IM LIKE COOL. GET BACK I SEE THE BITCH PUTTING HER PHONE BACK N HER PURSE. IM LIKE YALL READY SHE LIKE COOL LET'S LEAVE OUT THE BACK WAY! BY THIS TIME IT'S DARK SO THEY OPEN THE DOOR BUT FROM DUDE BEING DRUNK HE WAS MOVING SLOW AND I PEEP THEM SAME DUDES CHILLIN IN THIS CAR LIKE 3 CAR ROWS BACK. :eek: IM LIKE UM NAH DON'T THINK DUDE CAN MAKE IT HE TOO DRUNK, BLAH BLAH SO THEY LIKE WE CAN JUST DO THEN! SO HOW I WISHED, BUT I WASN'T BOUT TO GET MY ASS WHIPPED OVER SUM PUSS.. SO I DECLINED GO BACK IN THE BAR PART TO OH BOY HE JUST PASSED OUT AT THE BAR WE MOVE HIM TO A BOOTH THE OWNER TALKING SHIT LIKE NO DRUNKS IN HERE! YALL GOTTA GO THIS BIG WHITE DEER HUNTING ISH SAID (WHILE SHE WAS HELPING ME MOVE THIS DUDE) HE SURE IS A BIG ****** AINT HE!!! :eek: IM LIKE :eek:SPEECHLESS I FELT HELPLESS!! :smh: CAUSE EVERYBODY WAS A RED NECK I SEEN IN THE BAR! SO I'M LIKE WHERE IS OH GIRL AT? TO MAKE A LONG STORY SHORT SHE FINALLY CAME TO PICK ME UP AND I BANGED IT OUT ALL WEEKEND! SWALLOWED AND ALL!!
 
While in the service, met this white chick whose ex-husband(black) was still enlisted. She stayed in the area after they got divorced cause they had a kid. Anyway, spotted her working at the BX and since red beans and rice didn't miss her, neither could I. We start kickin it and 1 day I'm at her apartment making my beat down rounds (she was 2nd stop) and her ex shows up. Before I knew it, the bish had me on some R. Kelly type shit all in the closet hiding and shit. Somehow this mofo knew something was up and went looking thru the whole spot. When he finally made it to my closet, he opened the door and my dumb ass automatically gave him the head nod and was like "what's up". Now mind you, this is happening while I'm all twisted up in this tight assed closet. He didn't say or do nothing else, he just left. Turns out this punk was military police and that's where the bitch-assness starts. He put word out to damn near the whole force, and these bastards started pulling me over for anything they could think of. I never got pulled over on the yard before this shit went down, then that changed to almost every other day. Come on man, over some pussy?:smh: Serious bitch move, but I'm still kicking myself til this day for getting in that damn closet.

:lol: damn that's crazy
 
Met this chick on myspace before it was really popping a couple years back. Talked on the phone a couple times and she wanted me to come see her. So I drive out there (about an hour and some change) and this chick is the ugliest chick I have ever seen in my life. Bitch look like a dirty ostrich, I was mad as hell. She taking me around her town showing me off to her friends and shit. So I am out there for about an hour and just pull over to this parking lot. (I drove all this way I was gonna get a nut) and this bitch goes and kisses me in the mouth:puke:. She had the most chapped lips in the world and I can still taste that homemade tasting lipgloss she had on:puke:. I got my nut dropped her off and took the LONGEST ride of shame back home.

too funny :lol::lol::lol:
 
this is all in the 90s.

ride the #2 train from bk to the bronx, 2 times in the winter in the middle of the night.
pussy was damn good, but you know the #2 is above ground and after 12 the trains
come like every 1/2hr. i was freezing my ass waiting to go back home.

forgot to walk with condoms and had to go back out in near blizzard conditions, snow
drifts 4ft high to find an open arab store.

another winter time chick says come over. its a private house bell not working.
thank goodness she's on the ground level, but she has no phone. (yeh i used to
deal with broke chicks). trying hard to knock discretely, no answer nothing. i won't
say how long i was there. but next time we talk she says the door was open and i
could have come in. i felt like an ass.

so learned winter and pussy is a bad combo for me. i go wild in the spring and summer.
 
Not me, but my boy from the service. This dude was seriously trying to fuck the whole city, on & off the yard. So one chick he banging got some friends that want to kick it & shit, so they tell him to bring some friends. I think he told just me about it so he could keep his options open cuz he greedy like that. We all agree to meet up & decide we going out to eat, it was us 2 & 4 of them. Now even though my boy runs his game like a champ, bringing me into the mix was like rolling in yo pimped out Chrysler 300 & a stock Phantom pulls up next to you. Anyway, the finest one was feeling me & we both knew it. Can you believe this mofo asked me to give him a week to get at her first? He spent that week begging & buying her shit to get me off her mind. I did give him his week but he was basically done before he got started cuz it was too many things against him. His girl was her girl and she knew about them, plus she said she knew something was up when he came at her cuz she know how I was feeling her. To throw his girl off, he was telling her how "I" felt about her friend(info she passed on) when it was really how "he" felt about her. Didn't work. :smh: Oh yeah, I smashed well:yes:
 
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