The Internet is the last place to get advice but B*tch wont leave

Bounty Killah

Rising Star
BGOL Investor
I have a good one (in my opinion. YMMV. Opinions may differ).

Soooooooo, my wife constantly complains about how she's not happy and I don't do anything for her.

I finally just told her to straight up move out.

Chick won't leave though!!

She's like "put me out". I just look at her like she's crazy.

It's the internet so it ain't that serious, but how do I get this chick to leave my house under her own volition?

Whatever happened to never having to be told to leave twice?

Thoughts?
 
Brother, you haven't provided enough information for anyone to give any sound advice. Way too many unknowns. How old are ya'll? Where do you live? What kind of work do ya'll do? Are their kids? Are family and friends in town? Who's name is on the lease/mortgage? How long you been married?
 
Brother, you haven't provided enough information for anyone to give any sound advice. Way too many unknowns. How old are ya'll? Where do you live? What kind of work do ya'll do? Are their kids? Are family and friends in town? Who's name is on the lease/mortgage? How long you been married?
Especially this part. Are you renting or buying? If you're buying, it could get complicated. If you're renting, ride it out and dip.
 
If both of you make around the same you can get a divorce for pretty cheap, less than $1,000 as long as no one is being difficult.
 
You're stuck... Cohabitation and marriage license... Your only way out is to dissolve / remove her.
 
Yea, I left out a lot.... (deliberately, to be honest).

A few answers. We own a home. The down payment was sourced solely from my family, which the paper trail can prove. Sooooo, sale of the house entitles to her to half of the growth in equity (measured from the time the home was purchased). My initial down payment, which came from my bank account via my parents, would come out upfront, then the remainder would be split 50/50 after all costs (whatever that would be). No disputing this, or getting around it.

We live in the NY/NJ/CT Tri-State area.

Long term marriage.... I'm one of those HVM (Kevin Samuels rip) that you catch when they're young and before they become established. So, yup, I DO pay a substantial portion of the bills.

Kids are all over 18. One is a college grad (so no child support maintenance). Second is 19 but not in college (refuses to go; not the discussion here). So, no child support for the second one.

She has a job. MBA from a top-top Business school but, predictably, her corporate life fizzled out.... Now working a job simply to have income. Me, on the other hand, I just keep going from strength-to strength. I make multiples of what she makes (even before bonus).

We are middle aged....

Granted, I could leave but why do I walk away from it all? Why do I walk away from what my parents worked hard to establish and allow this chic to wind up with everything? Does that make sense?

Short of beating this donkey head heffa's ass, I am wondering why she just don't leave. I'm not leaving cause, morally and technically speaking, this is my house. Granted, it's our home but only cause this is where we live.

A little more too. She developed a Quaid/Fupar, and I told her when she was younger that she needed a tummy tuck but she refused. Now that shit has developed into a full blown FUPAR!!! She was never a "busty" woman so now you see her gut coming around the corner before you see anything else (not a good look).

(Remember, this is the internet so duck tales rule, but lets assume the situation is true and go from there.)
 
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Yea, I left out a lot.... (deliberately, to be honest).

A few answers. We own a home. The down payment was sourced solely from my family, which the paper trail can prove. Sooooo, sale of the house entitles to her to half of the growth in equity (measured from the time the home was purchased). My initial down payment, which came from my bank account via my parents, would come out upfront, then the remainder would be split 50/50 after all costs (whatever that would be). No disputing this, or getting around it.

We live in the NY/NJ/CT Tri-State area.

Long term marriage.... I'm one of those HVM (Kevin Samuels rip) that you catch when they're young and before they become established. So, yup, I DO pay a substantial portion of the bills.

Kids are all over 18. One is a college grad (so no child support maintenance). Second is 19 but not in college (refuses to go; not the discussion here). So, no child support for the second one.

She has a job. MBA from a top-top Business school but, predictably, her corporate life fizzled out.... Now working a job simply to have income. Me, on the other hand, I just keep going from strength-to strength. I make multiples of what she makes (even before bonus).

We are middle aged....

Granted, I could leave but why do I walk away from it all? Why do I walk away from what my parents worked hard to establish and allow this chic to wind up with everything? Does that make sense?

Short of beating this donkey dead heffa's ass, I am wondering why she just don't leave. I'm not leaving cause, morally and technically speaking, this is my house. Granted, it's our home but only cause this is where we live.

A little more too. She developed a Quaid/Fupar, and I told her when she was younger that she needed a tummy tuck but she refused. Now that shit has developed into a full blown FUPAR!!! She was never a "busty" woman so now you see her gut coming around the corner before you see anything else (not a good look).

(Remember, this is the internet so duck tales rule, but lets assume the situation is true and go from there.)
It sounds as if she is mostly unhappy with herself. She sounds as if she is putting you down to bring you down to her unhealthy level of where she feels she is. Have you sat down with her to see if she can go to counselling? If not, since you are HVM, considered asking her what she would need to go be on her own? Have you considered a mistress? Unhappy ppl can’t give you happiness. It seems at your core you care for her to some capacity, the question becomes should her unhappiness dictate your peace of mind.
 
Yea, I left out a lot.... (deliberately, to be honest).

A few answers. We own a home. The down payment was sourced solely from my family, which the paper trail can prove. Sooooo, sale of the house entitles to her to half of the growth in equity (measured from the time the home was purchased). My initial down payment, which came from my bank account via my parents, would come out upfront, then the remainder would be split 50/50 after all costs (whatever that would be). No disputing this, or getting around it.

We live in the NY/NJ/CT Tri-State area.

Long term marriage.... I'm one of those HVM (Kevin Samuels rip) that you catch when they're young and before they become established. So, yup, I DO pay a substantial portion of the bills.

Kids are all over 18. One is a college grad (so no child support maintenance). Second is 19 but not in college (refuses to go; not the discussion here). So, no child support for the second one.

She has a job. MBA from a top-top Business school but, predictably, her corporate life fizzled out.... Now working a job simply to have income. Me, on the other hand, I just keep going from strength-to strength. I make multiples of what she makes (even before bonus).

We are middle aged....

Granted, I could leave but why do I walk away from it all? Why do I walk away from what my parents worked hard to establish and allow this chic to wind up with everything? Does that make sense?

Short of beating this donkey dead heffa's ass, I am wondering why she just don't leave. I'm not leaving cause, morally and technically speaking, this is my house. Granted, it's our home but only cause this is where we live.

A little more too. She developed a Quaid/Fupar, and I told her when she was younger that she needed a tummy tuck but she refused. Now that shit has developed into a full blown FUPAR!!! She was never a "busty" woman so now you see her gut coming around the corner before you see anything else (not a good look).

(Remember, this is the internet so duck tales rule, but lets assume the situation is true and go from there.)
Well written bruh. I got nothing for you though. Wish you the best.
 
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It sounds as if she is mostly unhappy with herself. She sounds as if she is putting you down to bring you down to her unhealthy level of where she feels she is. Have you sat down with her to see if she can go to counselling? If not, since you are HVM, considered asking her what she would need to go be on her own? Have you considered a mistress? Unhappy ppl can’t give you happiness. It seems at your core you care for her to some capacity, the question becomes should her unhappiness dictate your peace of mind.

Interesting point that you bring up about her happiness. I have asked her in the past about what she would want from me to be on her own. She want me to pay her living cost, i.e., I don't want you just your money. To be frank, I ain't about to do that. My view is, you have a job, you have a degree from a top business school, leverage that sh*t and do you!

I've had mistresses. I do not currently have one, but I'm looking for a new one. Typically, these thing don't last long because they start looking for you to replace wifey with them, which I ain't about to do. I'm not leaving one woman for another. If anything, I'll be by myself and then find someone after I figure out my past relationship and what I need to change to make things better with the next woman.

As for counseling, we previously went but she was dismissive about the work that was required to achieve the necessary self-improvement or relationship improvement. For example, I would complete the post counseling exercises but she would brush them off. So, I won't go with her to couples counseling. She asked subsequently to go to couples counseling, but I told her no, and that she should go to counseling for herself. But she hasn't done that. So, in my view, counseling to her is a like a placebo.
 
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Consider the movie HEAT.

There is nothing on this planet that could keep me with an unhappy woman, especially if the kids are grown, and I have the means to leave. The FUPAR and disrespect? :smh: Fuck a house, by another one. If you really want out, talk a lawyer and make it clear you want a full escape. No support or alimony unless she gives up the house and even that needs to be minimal. Now that you want out, no paper trails of discourse. Keep calm, line your ducks up, seriously consider the best deal possible and GFTO. Peace of mind over everything.
 
Aw man sorry you are going through that. Don't waste energy on confrontations with her. Do you and be the best you that you can be. Also be out right honest with her about everything. Press for her for accountability for her actions and appearance. That will make these modern day women run for hills and or burn the house down while you are sleeping. So be careful with that.
 
This is simple. Tell her you'll make a deal with her. If she begins to do for herself (i.e. get in shape, do the things you would like), you will do much more for her. She's just looking for incentive to get right and you've pretty much given up on her and you're not providing any. This sounds like a salvageable situation if she's willing to play ball. It ain't gotta be all bad if you don't want it to be. And doing this makes it better for your daughters.
 
Consider the movie HEAT.

There is nothing on this planet that could keep me with an unhappy woman, especially if the kids are grown, and I have the means to leave. The FUPAR and disrespect? :smh: Fuck a house, by another one. If you really want out, talk a lawyer and make it clear you want a full escape. No support or alimony unless she gives up the house and even that needs to be minimal. Now that you want out, no paper trails of discourse. Keep calm, line your ducks up, seriously consider the best deal possible and GFTO. Peace of mind over everything.


This is a real interesting point, ie, the disrespect. At the end of the day, a woman needs to respect her man. One simply cannot spit in the hand one is eating from, and this is how I feel.

I didn't think about forcing her to give up claims to the house, but is that really fair. I mean, on paper, she is entitled to the half of the equity if we sell the house. My reason for not wanting to sell the home is because I have somewhere to park/store my car (an exotic) . Plus, in the Northeast, finding somewhere to live after selling a home is not an easy preposition. I may wind up paying even more to live than I'm paying now.

Good point though....
 
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Not trying to be on fuck shit but straight up the bitch is cheating or planning to cheat. She can't leave just yet cause she is waiting for the nigga that she is interested in to give her a greenlight (probably selling her a dream). My advice is to get that divorce now or...shit have a real discussion with her about having one. This type of situation never ends well for either party.
 
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I may be missing something , but why don’t you start the divorce and serve her? Also, the fact that your family put the money down on the house does not count when you are calculating the equity to be split when the house is a marital home.
This is a good time for you to get out of the marriage which seems irreconcilable because you are in your fifties and can still establish a good relationship with a beautiful woman.
 
I have a good one (in my opinion. YMMV. Opinions may differ).

Soooooooo, my wife constantly complains about how she's not happy and I don't do anything for her.

I finally just told her to straight up move out.

Chick won't leave though!!

She's like "put me out". I just look at her like she's crazy.

It's the internet so it ain't that serious, but how do I get this chick to leave my house under her own volition?

Whatever happened to never having to be told to leave twice?

Thoughts?
Wish I could help Boss but getting a woman to voluntarily walk away from a house without flopping yourself in the process is damn near mission impossible...the only way I could figure that happening is if there was a man on the outside selling her a dream but based off how you describe her I don't believe thats the case...women view keeping the house as objective number one in a divorce...shit, a middle aged, obese woman walking away from a house with parking in the tri-state area voluntarily while you keep it? You must be bloodclaat mad....good luck
 
I may be missing something , but why don’t you start the divorce and serve her? Also, the fact that your family put the money down on the house does not count when you are calculating the equity to be split when the house is a marital home.
This is a good time for you to get out of the marriage which seems irreconcilable because you are in your fifties and can still establish a good relationship with a beautiful woman.
Need to sell the house before the divorce. This way there's no property issue. That's what I don't just file. But I actually don't want to sell my house, particularly with rising interest rates and the fact that I'd probably pay way way more for housing in this area for less.
 
Wish I could help Boss but getting a woman to voluntarily walk away from a house without flopping yourself in the process is damn near mission impossible...the only way I could figure that happening is if there was a man on the outside selling her a dream but based off how you describe her I don't believe thats the case...women view keeping the house as objective number one in a divorce...shit, a middle aged, obese woman walking away from a house with parking in the tri-state area voluntarily while you keep it? You must be bloodclaat mad....good luck

She's not obese but point taken. A dread could always dream, rude bwoy :nerd:
 
Need to sell the house before the divorce. This way there's no property issue. That's what I don't just file. But I actually don't want to sell my house, particularly with rising interest rates and the fact that I'd probably pay way way more for housing in this area for less.
Then just wait until the divorce , put the details in the property division agreement and make sure it states that you keep the house and she signs a deed to you and you are refinance it and give her a specific amount.
You still haven’t answered my question about why you have not initiated the divorce action ?
 
Then just wait until the divorce , put the details in the property division agreement and make sure it states that you keep the house and she signs a deed to you and you are refinance it and give her a specific amount.
You still haven’t answered my question about why you have not initiated the divorce action ?

I did answer the question bro. Because I would need to sell the house without it being part of a divorce proceeding. That's why I haven't initiated it.

Your stipulations are noted but things don't always go as expected. By selling that removes one unpredictable.

Another unpredictable is aspect of a forced sale pursuant to a divorce decree. This would take away my flexibility.

Also filing a divorce could cause her to entrench and then it would be even worse.

Just move out and let me go from there....
 
bruh. life is short.

look at it like this. you have no idea how many days you have left on this earth....AND you are CHOOSING to spend them with a woman you no longer want to be with....

SAY THAT SHIT OUT LOUD....

you can replace the money breh....

figure out what to do with the house and go live your life....your kids will understand....and if they dont....:dunno:

last i checked caskets dont come with bunk beds.....

behave accordingly
 
Yea, I left out a lot.... (deliberately, to be honest).

A few answers. We own a home. The down payment was sourced solely from my family, which the paper trail can prove. Sooooo, sale of the house entitles to her to half of the growth in equity (measured from the time the home was purchased). My initial down payment, which came from my bank account via my parents, would come out upfront, then the remainder would be split 50/50 after all costs (whatever that would be). No disputing this, or getting around it.

We live in the NY/NJ/CT Tri-State area.

Long term marriage.... I'm one of those HVM (Kevin Samuels rip) that you catch when they're young and before they become established. So, yup, I DO pay a substantial portion of the bills.

Kids are all over 18. One is a college grad (so no child support maintenance). Second is 19 but not in college (refuses to go; not the discussion here). So, no child support for the second one.

She has a job. MBA from a top-top Business school but, predictably, her corporate life fizzled out.... Now working a job simply to have income. Me, on the other hand, I just keep going from strength-to strength. I make multiples of what she makes (even before bonus).

We are middle aged....

Granted, I could leave but why do I walk away from it all? Why do I walk away from what my parents worked hard to establish and allow this chic to wind up with everything? Does that make sense?

Short of beating this donkey head heffa's ass, I am wondering why she just don't leave. I'm not leaving cause, morally and technically speaking, this is my house. Granted, it's our home but only cause this is where we live.

A little more too. She developed a Quaid/Fupar, and I told her when she was younger that she needed a tummy tuck but she refused. Now that shit has developed into a full blown FUPAR!!! She was never a "busty" woman so now you see her gut coming around the corner before you see anything else (not a good look).

(Remember, this is the internet so duck tales rule, but lets assume the situation is true and go from there.)

‘Leaving isn’t walking away from it all for you anymore than for her. Quit bullshitting. Move out. File divorce within a couple of weeks and get divorced. If she wants the house, she has to buy you out. Or vice-versa. Or sell the house, split the proceeds and move on. Sitting around waiting for her to move out is because you ain’t ready to get divorced and you know she won’t leave so you can act like you want divorce but know it ain’t happening.

‘when you’re ready, it will be action, not lip service.
 
I did answer the question bro. Because I would need to sell the house without it being part of a divorce proceeding. That's why I haven't initiated it.

Your stipulations are noted but things don't always go as expected. By selling that removes one unpredictable.

Another unpredictable is aspect of a forced sale pursuant to a divorce decree. This would take away my flexibility.

Also filing a divorce could cause her to entrench and then it would be even worse.

Just move out and let me go from there....
Ok, it appears that youre in NJ which is an equitable division of property state. So, this means that it’s not a statutory 50% split. The Court looks at who deserves what and then rules on that. In your case, you will get more than 50%. I suggest you do a one hour consultation with an attorney and then proceed.
 
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Your wife seems to know the law.
If you leave, she is getting the house.
It will look like YOU abandoned the marriage and that is what she wants.
You will be the bad guy and the courts will treat you accordingly.
It is cheaper to keep her. Good luck.
 
Your wife seems to know the law.
If you leave, she is getting the house.
It will look like YOU abandoned the marriage and that is what she wants.
You will be the bad guy and the courts will treat you accordingly.
It is cheaper to keep her. Good luck.


Yea, she knows the TV law. Cheaper to keep her!

 
You need to get you a good white woman you wouldn't be in this situation now had you married a white woman to begin with. Stay away from these trifling hoes that you will eventually regret getting with.
 
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