Bingoooo... her position has been demoted
FB Question, that I’d love to know the brothers point of view.....
- Thread starter yasky777
- Start date
This is real talk.
When we get back to letting the man lead, we start back to building black families.
Our shit is weaker now because of hypergamy being celebrated.
Its easy to do for self. Its harder to cooperate. Somebody has to take the lead.
Dude already did everything necessary. He made the bank and built the nest.
All she has to do is get on board and kick in.
Our sistas have become hardheaded from listening to the wrong people instead of us.
They don't want to let a black man lead and only want to hear from us when the shit hits the fan.
Then, they want us to open our wallets and not our mouths.
Selfishness.
Dude is offering her a great deal by sharing the life he built with her.
She has to let him continue to do what he has already done and become the helper he is asking her to be.
Or else, she gonna end up calling Kevin Samuel's show asking "where are all of the high value men at?"
I'll just quote myself here. Too many men want authority they don't have the ability or interest in properly wielding.
Trust has to be earned. You can't just say you're a leader, you have to show and prove you have the capacity for sound decision making. This applies to men and women.
What if there is nothing missing..what if I was right and she’s just 1 of those chicks that think the dude suppose to pay for everything once you take the next step.. sometimes it’s just that mindset period.. think about it no other prices were negotiated just a flabbergasted woman.. that sounds like a person that thought it was gonna be 1 way and it wasn’t
enjoy your rent increase
If she wasn't willing to pay there wouldn't have been a discussion about sharing expenses.
The convo could of been in order for you to do be able to save money and push forward your plan for financial progression you should move in with me.. he prob was like your rent alone is taking 21,600 of your salary..you can save so much by moving in with me.. her head went into happy mode like omg you know what I can do with 21 extra thousand dollars a yr..prob go on all kinda trips, bags, buying new car.. than he was like let me finish , yeah I’m going to need for you to put up $800 a month to help with some of these bills.. than her fantasy was crushed and she was flabbergasted.. that’s probably what happened..she was already spending money in her head than he hit her with the yeah so 10,000 of that going to the crib.. than it was like wait I thought you said the house was already paid, why should I pay you, you my man I shouldn’t have to pay cause men should pay for their woman, I’m old fashion blah blah
They need to find a Captain..and take a seat...cause when THE TITANIC.. SINK....NOONE asks about the passengers..what was the CAPTAIN doing..brah
Muffuckin rite...brah
Projection. I'd think you would know better the way you talk about all the women who spoil you.
not all females built the same.. some are cool some are not.. I’ve seen females do great shit I seen females do evil shit.. same with dudes.. maybe this is 1 of those females.. I think you just don’t want to believe that this might be 1 of those females.. sometimes it just is.. yes some females do spoil me that’s why I won’t tolerate certain bullshit and expect certain treatment.. if you don’t meet those expectations bye bye.. but females overall man I love them
Also the biggest question in the world nobody asked was what race is these two people..that could be a big part of the explanation of why the two people reacted the way they did.. if the broad a cac, Asian, mid eastern, or Indian than there’s definitely entitlement issues.. I def can see a Becky folding her arms thinking she a queen on some spoiled rotten shit talking to a dude thinking he supposed to save her while she navigate the world for free.. yeah I’m gonna need a race check on this story
No. If you'll recall I started out agreeing the man was correct in this situation. It was one of you're MALE brethren @playahaitian whose wisdom swayed my opinion. PH is a family man, head of household and a provider. Some men have the capacity and examples growing up to know what this involves, or can grow into it, and some don't. (Likewise with women.) His perspective is going to be different than men who only have to look out for themselves and are on constant guard against gold diggers or who just want to be a player and get sexual benefits without deep or long lasting commitments. To the latter, women are interchangeable. When that is your perspective, then of course you want to tell her to hit the bricks the first time a disagreement comes up. If he shares your attitude, she is better off without him. If he wants rent, I'm ok with that, but they also need a written agreement at that point, perhaps regardless even. Consider it a pre-prenup to protect his interests.
Playa just wanted to plays devil advocate..thats what the inside joke was between me and him.. he didn’t just want to go all in with my initial response and wanted to give a small percentage of benefit of doubt.. but even he would jokingly agree my straight forward response was more true than not.. as i said enjoy the rent hike.. sometimes you can give people an option for them to do better but in the end it’s their choice.. she didn’t like the stipulations cool enjoy your rent hike just remember if you dislike your future money situation or start having money problems cause the rent increase I don’t want to hear it..I offered you a solution you chose otherwise
true.....
too many times it seems that we dont give each other a real chance to prove... its frustrating and saddening
Then make better choices in men. Don't choose those men.
Problem solved.
A lot of women think they have better options than they actually do.
Just because a dude likes some pics on instagram and sends a dick pic doesn't mean he's about shit or has his shit together.
Just like those chicks calling in Kevin Samuels's show, passing up thousandaires because they think they deserve millionaires, only to realize they passed up on too many good dudes and put out to too many bad ones after its too late, and the millionaires they want don't want them.
Black men and black women both have some housecleaning to do.
True. Very true.
The guy being discussed has done that already.
House, job, everything paid - he's done that.
If she doesn't get with the program, there's a woman out there who will.
The thing is, she may not be American...or she may not be black.
Sistas be like "We done lost another one!"
True. Very true.
The guy being discussed has done that already.
House, job, everything paid - he's done that.
If she doesn't get with the program, there's a woman out there who will.
The thing is, she may not be American...or she may not be black.
Sistas be like "We done lost another one!"
What one won't do...the next one will...and that's a muffuckin fact..jackkk
It takes time to determine someone character. You don't know 30 seconds after meeting them.
I don't think a diq pic over the internet is an indicator of quality relationship material. Y'all pass those out like candy and expect women to be disproportionately impressed. How old are you?
That is the main issue honestly. If you are 35-45+ and have your shit together, you really don't have to put up with shit like this. There are levels and a lot of women are either in denial about which level they really are on or completely oblivious about the world around them due to social media "bubbles". Case in point, a long while back I had one my new hires in my office explain that she liked the guy she went on a date with but she wasn't sure he was on her "level" professionally because he drove an older, boxy looking truck and she had a C300. She said he was smart etc. but his "old" car was a deal breaker for her. Keep in mind this woman maybe makes $70k and her car is a used, older C class. She showed me his instagram and I had the pleasure of explaining that the "boxy" truck was a fucking vintage Land Rover Defender...
True. Very true.
The guy being discussed has done that already.
House, job, everything paid - he's done that.
If she doesn't get with the program, there's a woman out there who will.
The thing is, she may not be American...or she may not be black.
Sistas be like "We done lost another one!"
It showed he made good financial decisions for himself, not that he is stable in all areas or can handle a crisis. For all we know his parents could have helped him pay off the house or an ex.
Not everyone desires home ownership. Perhaps she was ok paying 1800-2000 because she didn't want the headache of home ownership and what comes along with it as a single woman. We don't know how her rent compares to local mortgage payments. We don't know the debt either one is carrying, credit score or other history. The OP said the arrangement would benefit both of them financially.
She could have been discussing the rent going up, not because she couldn't afford it, but because it's an increase out of nowhere and she was sharing her day. He may have taken the opportunity to get her closer to him instead of having to commute to see her.
All the scenarios y'all paint put the woman in a negative light because you don't respect women or hold us in high regard to begin with.
Feminist Becky who majored in womens' studies in college will do that shit.
She's ready to metoo his ass before her bags get unpacked.
A lot of Beckys talk that shit online and in front of their girls but at home, she'll wake his ass up to suck him off and it ain't even his birthday.
White dudes tend to be bigger simps, too.
Its safe to assume they are black. Dude said [ChrisTucker]You ain't put in on this![/ChrisTucker] when he asked her to check some cheddar.
Houses are expensive. Dude might have just wanted to have some disposable income for a change.
She better take that deal before its off the table.
That is the main issue honestly. If you are 35-45+ and have your shit together, you really don't have to put up with shit like this. There are levels and a lot of women are either in denial about which level they really are on or completely oblivious about the world around them due to social media "bubbles". Case in point, a long while back I had one my new hires in my office explain that she liked the guy she went on a date with but she wasn't sure he was on her "level" professionally because he drove an older, boxy looking truck and she had a C300. She said he was smart etc. but his "old" car was a deal breaker for her. Keep in mind this woman maybe makes $70k and her car is a used, older C class. She showed me his instagram and I had the pleasure of explaining that the "boxy" truck was a fucking vintage Land Rover Defender...
SMH. I guess you're another one who sees women as interchangeable.
What do you mean by interchangeable ? If you mean people have soul mates or anything like that, I don't agree.
Don't put me in that shit. I don't even do social media and don't send out pics of anything.
My point was that SOME women will make poor choices based on all of the wrong things.
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Why bring it up as an example? |
I'm not speaking of soul mates, but y'all speak like of changing women like women change shoes. Then one of y'all will break up and make a thread about what you've lost.
Thank you. There is no such thing.
There are people who choose to be together and work on being together. That's all.
Having a lot in common is great and people tend to put labels on that shit because they want it to seem magical but its really just two people putting in the work to be together, which in my opinion, is so much better than that soulmate bullshit. There is no cheat code for a marriage or LTRs and its disrespectful to credit all of that work to some "magical" fairytale bullshit.
I'm married with kids but I could also be happy unmarried with no kids if that makes sense. My wife is in the same boat where she could be happy, successful etc. without me but I think that is the main reason we can be happy together. My wife pays for our kids school tuition and drinks when we used to go out pre-covid. I pay for the rest of everything. If things changed and she needed to chip in more, she would and nothing would change in terms of our dynamic/relationship. The key I think in life is to find someone who wants you but doesn't need you...
Exactly. My wife loves that I like to cook and keep things clean because she sees it as me respecting her time/energy just like I respect her for not doing the back and forth/arguing bullshit over inconsequential things. There are things we legit disagree on but because we actually love/respect one another they don't become huge problems. Some people's default space is conflict or tension so you have to find someone who doesn't see that as normal...
That is the main issue honestly. If you are 35-45+ and have your shit together, you really don't have to put up with shit like this. There are levels and a lot of women are either in denial about which level they really are on or completely oblivious about the world around them due to social media "bubbles". Case in point, a long while back I had one my new hires in my office explain that she liked the guy she went on a date with but she wasn't sure he was on her "level" professionally because he drove an older, boxy looking truck and she had a C300. She said he was smart etc. but his "old" car was a deal breaker for her. Keep in mind this woman maybe makes $70k and her car is a used, older C class. She showed me his instagram and I had the pleasure of explaining that the "boxy" truck was a fucking vintage Land Rover Defender...
Sad....that now a potential mate Is judged on what he drives....brah
Brah...Find the one for you... throw em in the gutta...go try anotha...
And then when the mistakes are made...they looking for a simp...to take over...and house em....brah