The Nice Nigga Theory
- Thread starter tuckdog
- Start date
Falling under the nice guy category is pretty shitty cuz once you find a chick you actually like for reals, the majority of the time you'll be stuck with that "good friend/nice guy" label. That just happened with me cuz I was hanging with this chick for a while, but all of a sudden she got back with her dude. Apparently she was on one of those dumb little "breaks" with dude. And of course didnt mention it before. But I guess luckily things didnt get serious or shit would be even crappier. Not sure if its because Ive always been the "nice guy" or what, but at times it does suck. Depends on the chick you are interested in I guess, more than anything else.
I agree with the whole excitement thing but that whole feel protected shit is funny as hell. In 2010 the negro who can afford a good zip code keep you and the kids protected, not the 7' brotha in the hood.
I wrote the woman sports comparison a while back. It was in this thread http://www.bgol.us/board/showthread.php?t=513694&highlight=30's
I came up with that idea because a female had piss me off..
Then T.O was whinning again and complaining and I was like he acting like a bitch him and Iversonif u think being an asshole is gonna get u women u are sadly mistaken
even if u think u found a woman who likes it....why would u want to invite that negative energy in your relationship or life for that matter
i love nice guys...but i dont want a push over
if i sense that if we get mugged u will run away or be unable to protect me im turned off
if i sense that if someone disrespects me while we are out it will be up to me to handle the situation im turned off
if i sense that if we get poor service at a resturant i will have to be the one to ensure we get what we paid for i will be turned off
i am assertive...i get what i want and get shit done...however i do not want to be the dominate one...i do not have a penis
its not about being "nice" its about being able to provide security...women just don't say it and express it correctly...and it doesnt help that many women do not have positive examples of what a man should be
This is coming from a grown woman. Are u hearing this? This is what I have been saying from the jump. The simp nice guy role doesn't cut it. U also don't have to be the biggest jerk in the world either.
What do females want?
Alpha Male Leadership.
The thugs and bad boys treat them like crap but deep inside of these lost chicks that twisted type of dominance provides a form of male leadership.
If a hard working average brother will step up and take the lead and not placate the female and reward her cooperation (through love, affection, attention, finances or whatever) and reward her respect for him as a man with "nice" kind loving deeds he is not a weak brown nosing thirsty tricking simp nor is he a bad boy thug.
He is a man who leads, who sets the pace and who sets the rules. He will also respect her because she respects him (as a man and not as a simp).
He does not have to change himself into a different person. He just needs to step up and be a man while maintaining and asserting his own distinct style and personality and play the role of the male leader.
The sad part is that I still see 30-and 40-something women who are attractive who think that their shit doesn't stink...and men who still will simp for them...but they're still not married...not sure if they want to be, because they're female playas...but eventually, a playa gets played by someone (male or female) who plays the game better than they do...but you wouldn't know it, because they're still looking down their noses at Brothers...
Nope...it's in our entire community...rich and poor...
bump
I can understand that... this is what is perplexing... correct me if i'm wrong please...
Is it your opinion that a 'simp' cannot/will not be honest with a woman because he perpetually agrees with her and that women eventually dislike for a man to agree with her at all times so she purposely gravitates toward men who will not agree with her constantly. In other words the 'simp' isn't being honest with himself or the woman and that the woman can see that and thus is attracted to someone who can at least be honest with her regardless of his other flaws?
I also gotta ask females where the fuck are you when youre getting disrespected infront of your man??? Ive NEVER been out with a lady and someone have the balls to step outta line... I mean ninjas are gonna look at your girl, thats just part of the goin out experience. But Ive never had someone disrespect... How common is that shit really, or is it another excuse being made up to not date a certain kind of dude????
I still can't believe this is being debated. It's not about women not KNOWING what they want, it's about some women not being able to RECOGNIZE what they want when they see it. Women's view of an alpha male changes depending on age and circumstance. When they're young with no responsibility, they view the dangerous man, the wild one, as the alpha male. He'll provide adventure, and a (false) sense of security, meaning she thinks he can and/or will fight to protect her. This is why the "thugs" are so appealing to young, and young minded women. They start to believe in the Sensitive Thug myth.
With age, women begin to see Alpha Men a little bit differently. They seek emotional/mental/long term financial stability first, with adventure on the side. The problem with that is, some women become less appealing to the man they want after they've evolved. If they had a baby during their "fun" years, the man they want may not want them. The "Nice Guy" they rejected during their "fun" years may be looking for a woman who doesn't have kids because he wants to start fresh, specifically if he doesn't have kids.
The bitterness needs to stop. Women who can't "find" a good man because they made shitty decisions in their life need to acknowledge that. Heal! Men can spot bitterness from a mile away. It's not a good man's job to heal you, or put you back together. Conversely, bitter ass men need to heal too. Just because someone didnt want you 5 years ago doesn't give you the right to bash all black women. Yall niggas are Terry McMillan ass niggas with a tad bit more testosterone. Good women don't want some homotional ass bitter man.
Men and women need to work on themselves first before they can expect someone to want their broken battered asses.
With age, women begin to see Alpha Men a little bit differently. They seek emotional/mental/long term financial stability first, with adventure on the side. The problem with that is, some women become less appealing to the man they want after they've evolved. If they had a baby during their "fun" years, the man they want may not want them. The "Nice Guy" they rejected during their "fun" years may be looking for a woman who doesn't have kids because he wants to start fresh, specifically if he doesn't have kids.
The bitterness needs to stop. Women who can't "find" a good man because they made shitty decisions in their life need to acknowledge that. Heal! Men can spot bitterness from a mile away. It's not a good man's job to heal you, or put you back together. Conversely, bitter ass men need to heal too. Just because someone didnt want you 5 years ago doesn't give you the right to bash all black women. Yall niggas are Terry McMillan ass niggas with a tad bit more testosterone. Good women don't want some homotional ass bitter man.
Men and women need to work on themselves first before they can expect someone to want their broken battered asses.
co-sign everything except for the red. sometimes you need to air out some bitches if they rejected you for bad or wrong reasons. you got to stand your grond at times .
but pretty much you nailed it. but by time these females get matured they're damaged goods. i dont want a chick that was passed down from ninja to ninja.
I had a chick dismiss me because I wasnt religious... Now that doesnt make me a heathen. Nevermind I treated he with respect, Am a good person etc... She just could wrap her head around the fact that I wasnt religious and wasnt gonna change... Dumb reason to me, but yeah I can say they females have some dumb reasons for discounting a quality dude...
^^This..
True, but the harsh reality is, the odds are more than likely she had someone before she gets to you.
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and is being too nice is considered a dumb reason?
cause for the life of me i dont know how females are attracted to ninjas with drama and cause problems. cuz last thing i want is a receeding hairline because of stress and arguements.
Because they are just little girls in grown ass bodies
They feel they need this shit to actually live, like a psychological narcotic.
You're right, they seem to pass up a dozen decent men who dont offer them that level of excitement and by the time they figure it out, its usually after a kid or more, and them being worn out.
Which leads to another thread about not wanting to settle with a female with kids, and how there may still be some women with kids, it seems more and more that there are those with kids flooding the dating market
On point
But men will bounce back from it more then women
It will make them more cautious and aware
As long as they dont bring the poison to the next female they meet, and continue a useless and destructive cycle, its all good
Women have been saying "black men aint shit" since the start of feminism and benefits from the Great Society, ignoring their piss-poor choices, and raising the last few generations of men and women in this poison, creating more damaged and broken people.
Women need to be aired out on their fuckery, because the fact no one really questioned them for so long, only with the advent of the web and youtube do you see it, but they had the media for 4 decade and still cant handle being aired out in teh few years men have been doing it
So now cats gotta be amusement parks in order to get a woman.....
Nah son here is the real fact......Women don t know wtf is real and what is sizzle and no substance.....
What s real in life is boring to today s woman....problem....
What s real is family the wife 2 kids 2 cars and a mortgage.....that s real.....
The bullshit is is calling that realness.....boring....life aint adventure and excitement...life is not an episode of the fall guy....
I am actually saying the same thing that you are saying. Its just that in my situation there was two things working against me . One I wasn't being my natural self and two she wasn't ready to be with a guy that appreciated her. All I'm suggesting is that you eliminate being the "nice guy " so that u don't allow yourself to become manipulated. Lets face it being a nice guy is a manipulation tactic. Whenever you open the door of manipulation you become subject to being manipulated yourself.
I feel you. The problem is, some men begin to paint with a broad brush. It's one thing to air out the specific woman or women who didn't want you at one point, then came back once they evolved. It's another thing to make an entire race of women pay because of a few idiots. That was my point.
I agree with this, but most dudes just end up with women of different ethnicities, especially dudes in the black community that get called corny. The other brand of dudes are the dudes who get called that and become bitter. They exist, albeit being a minority.
The even funnier part is that some of the coldest players are made as a result of heartbreak....and many women flock to those dudes..
alot of black folks got unrequited love in their hearts and dont know what to do...
I agree I just do me ... last thing I wanna do is change my personality to be compatible with the latest trend for women ... who change their minds every 5 minutes ... amma nice guy respectful and all and some women will still call me aggressive ... so it all depends on who you deal with ..
for example ... a women with less class is going to want a man that will be physically aggressive and not value the mental aggression a woman of a higher class will ... not saying that's the rule
That is just trickin or simpin to me ... I consider "nice" things like being respectful and not playin mind games and not leading a chick on damn near ruining her life ...
I was nice to girls back in HS and was ending up in the friend zone until my friend broke it down for me "Treat them like shit, and they'll love you for it"
I was like
I faked it, acted like an ass and the pussy just started falling from heaven
Worked in college too
I was like
I faked it, acted like an ass and the pussy just started falling from heaven
Worked in college too
It's better not to change up because then your just doing what the chick wants and not being yourself. Plus, for a lot of "nice" guys out there, it's pretty hard to start acting like a douche automatically. Cuz once you switch it up, there s a good chance of the chick thinking your an actual dick rather than the idea of the guy being "dangerous/adventorous" which women think they need.
I'm a busy guy ... I don't have time to 'lead' another adult ... desire is worried about issues that you find in lower class situations ... which is why when brothers get money they are less attractive to black women and other women become more compatible ...
Look, if you are making even DECENT PAPER you and your lady don't worry about getting mugged, getting disrespected when you go out, or bad service at a restaurant ... that would be like worrying about getting hit by lighting ....
People with paper worry about:
Keeping their house ... protecting their net worth ... and making sure the future is secure ... an upper class more sophisticated woman wants a man that she feels is going to make THAT happen no matter what ... he will protect their lifestyle at almost any cost ... PYTs on the other hand are looking for someone to protect their physical bodies, and thugs are good for that
No disrespect to desire but I hope she can see the difference
Black_Hand
Banned
C/S this 100%
I used nice as a blanket term, what you said is 100% correct.
Protecting a chick in a fight is a form of male leadership.
Providing for a household financially is a form of male leadership.
Someone takes the lead, sets the rules and sets the agenda in the relationship. The simp follows the chick's lead. The thug or bad boy does not.
Women are attracted to physical leadership, financial leadership, intellectual leadership and male leadership in general.
Romance novels are female fantasies and the simp does not win the girl in those fantasies. In the real world women yearn to respect a masculine male leader.
Dudes keep saying don't be fake and change yourself. What is fake about demanding and insisting that you be respected as an alpha male leader in the relationship? When she respects your leadership u can then treat her like a queen if she is willing to let u be king.
Where is the conflict?