The Nice Nigga Theory
- Thread starter tuckdog
- Start date
The problem is when the hood mentality is accepted by the vast majority of our community, even those who are not or ever been in the hood.
I have NEVER spoke to a hood girl, yet I have ran into this often.
excuse my ignorance, what does that mean, I have an idea but i wanna make sure I am correct..
if u think being an asshole is gonna get u women u are sadly mistaken
even if u think u found a woman who likes it....why would u want to invite that negative energy in your relationship or life for that matter
i love nice guys...but i dont want a push over
if i sense that if we get mugged u will run away or be unable to protect me im turned off
if i sense that if someone disrespects me while we are out it will be up to me to handle the situation im turned off
if i sense that if we get poor service at a resturant i will have to be the one to ensure we get what we paid for i will be turned off
i am assertive...i get what i want and get shit done...however i do not want to be the dominate one...i do not have a penis
its not about being "nice" its about being able to provide security...women just don't say it and express it correctly...and it doesnt help that many women do not have positive examples of what a man should be
even if u think u found a woman who likes it....why would u want to invite that negative energy in your relationship or life for that matter
i love nice guys...but i dont want a push over
if i sense that if we get mugged u will run away or be unable to protect me im turned off
if i sense that if someone disrespects me while we are out it will be up to me to handle the situation im turned off
if i sense that if we get poor service at a resturant i will have to be the one to ensure we get what we paid for i will be turned off
i am assertive...i get what i want and get shit done...however i do not want to be the dominate one...i do not have a penis
its not about being "nice" its about being able to provide security...women just don't say it and express it correctly...and it doesnt help that many women do not have positive examples of what a man should be
even the grimiest niggas know which bitches to procreate it when the feelin &need to procreate comes up in life
Thats when they wants the "nice guy" or sucka ass negro
Want to have fun with the bad boy who blows out her back and treats her like shit, but when 30 comes around, a kid of two, they're looking for someone dependable to provide for her and some other dudes kids
Whats funny is, even knowing this, there are still some of these "nice guys" willing and wanting to fall for this fuckery.
Disclaimer: This is not intended to be a black women bashing thread. I have love for all black women and I am just asking a question that has perplexed me for as long as I remember. Ladies, I would like your input just as much as I would like the fellas input.
Ok fam. We've all gotten our laugh on this Christmas thanks to LES's thread and Ten's devious ass bumping his year old thread. However, the thread sparked an interesting question. Why do women, especially black women, prefer players and thugs over "nice guys"?
Speaking from personal experiences, I was once the "nice guy". I was raised solely by my mother, who I adored, and she taught me all about being respectful, loving, and caring towards other women. When I was old enough to start pursuing girls, this is how I carried myself towards them. From about 11 to 16, I was the nigga writing poems, opening doors, and just being an overall good dude to chicks thinking that's what they want (moms is never wrong right?).
Needless to say, that shit got me nowhere. Around 15/16 I started hanging out with older cats, listening to there stories, and they schooled me on what I was doing wrong. The niggas that treated girls like absolute shit had to beat them off with a stick just to walk the streets. At the same time, I began listening to my mother and her friends when they in the crib sippin E&J, and I would always hear them talking about how a nigga was too nice for them, and they wouldn't be calling them back.
I collected all this info, and rearranged my whole steez. Of course, when I stopped taking chicks calls, talking to other broads right in front of the chicks that I was messing with, and acting like a complete asshole, my dating life did a complete 360.
To make a very long story short, I'm out of the dating game and happily married, but that question has never left my mind. Why do a lot of women like to be treated like shit? And fellas, when did you realize that the "nice guy" role wasn't cutting it, and what did you do about it?
1. No women wants to be treated like crap, if she's not worth anything she will lay with a man who isn't worth anything. Women who end up with losers are bums are usually bums themselves.
2. Black men in general simp alot towards women, as a whole we've become a very soft group of men and it's more the mentality and the pushing of ignorant culture on the youth than anything else. Women generally prefer men and generally a man who is focused on his business with her as a sidekick rather him focused on her with him as a sidekick. Men who cater to women look weak because they give off the image that they have nothing going on. Black men are trained to chase tail rather than read books so they give off the image that they have nothing going on in their lives.... The "what do you do" question is a good example.
-- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
If you notice that all of these desperate women today are the result of choosing the latter. Right now you have a 3 generations of women who mad because they cannot find a decent man. More women have to resort to sharing a man, or taking care of a bum. And until women teach younger girl to embrace a guy being nice; they will only continue to get pregnant by lowlifes; then become old and bitter.
I think we need this quoted in Old English with a Joseph Ducreux pic
Disclaimer: This is not intended to be a black women bashing thread. I have love for all black women and I am just asking a question that has perplexed me for as long as I remember. Ladies, I would like your input just as much as I would like the fellas input.
Ok fam. We've all gotten our laugh on this Christmas thanks to LES's thread and Ten's devious ass bumping his year old thread. However, the thread sparked an interesting question. Why do women, especially black women, prefer players and thugs over "nice guys"?
Speaking from personal experiences, I was once the "nice guy". I was raised solely by my mother, who I adored, and she taught me all about being respectful, loving, and caring towards other women. When I was old enough to start pursuing girls, this is how I carried myself towards them. From about 11 to 16, I was the nigga writing poems, opening doors, and just being an overall good dude to chicks thinking that's what they want (moms is never wrong right?).
Needless to say, that shit got me nowhere. Around 15/16 I started hanging out with older cats, listening to there stories, and they schooled me on what I was doing wrong. The niggas that treated girls like absolute shit had to beat them off with a stick just to walk the streets. At the same time, I began listening to my mother and her friends when they in the crib sippin E&J, and I would always hear them talking about how a nigga was too nice for them, and they wouldn't be calling them back.
I collected all this info, and rearranged my whole steez. Of course, when I stopped taking chicks calls, talking to other broads right in front of the chicks that I was messing with, and acting like a complete asshole, my dating life did a complete 360.
To make a very long story short, I'm out of the dating game and happily married, but that question has never left my mind. Why do a lot of women like to be treated like shit? And fellas, when did you realize that the "nice guy" role wasn't cutting it, and what did you do about it?
So, did you married a woman you treat like shit and would disrespect her in front of her face?
/thread
Please elaborate...
True... very true. I lot of people are still effectively in high school. If a chick dissed you when you were both 16 then let that go... both of you were children. But people carry high school baggage with them throughout life. Effectively punishing women and themselves based on actions that happened when they were high school sophomores. I understand it but it's counterproductive.
Black_Hand
Banned
if u think being an asshole is gonna get u women u are sadly mistaken
even if u think u found a woman who likes it....why would u want to invite that negative energy in your relationship or life for that matter
i love nice guys...but i dont want a push over
if i sense that if we get mugged u will run away or be unable to protect me im turned off
if i sense that if someone disrespects me while we are out it will be up to me to handle the situation im turned off
if i sense that if we get poor service at a resturant i will have to be the one to ensure we get what we paid for i will be turned off
i am assertive...i get what i want and get shit done...however i do not want to be the dominate one...i do not have a penis
its not about being "nice" its about being able to provide security...women just don't say it and express it correctly...and it doesnt help that many women do not have positive examples of what a man should be
Truth
Women, in my limited experience, want a dominant (but never domineering ) man
Be a confident, secure man who has compassion and you're good
I guess Ill chime in with my opinion. I replied to a thread like this in the past but Ill step up and say my piece again. When I was in college I was a relatively shy guy. Mostly because I didn't have any confidence in myself. While in college I met this female at my job that used to come through to order food. I would chat it up with her but would never ask for her number. Finally I got the nerve to ask for her number and she gave it to me. I had the miseducation from my mom and sisters that a woman wanted a guy that could be really sweet and nice and do great things for her. While talking to her and chatting with her I was the perfect gentlemen open the doors made sure I wasn't too aggressive with my language, bought her roses for valentines etc...
Well you can predict what happen at that point ... Yep got thrown right in the friend zone. I chalked it up as a lost but kept in touch with her from that point on as a friend. Began talking to other females and the ones that I had no interest in I just chopped it up with them like they were home boys that I knew from high school. I wouldn't censor myself around them said what ever came to mind i said it. if a sexual thought came to mind I would say it. If i thought they were full of shit I would tell em. If they wanted me to do something for them and I didn't feel like it I would say it. If they stepped out of line I would check em. And do you know those females were the ones that wanted to fuck me the most.
What I am trying to say is there is no such thing as a nice guy. There a nice acts nice objects but not nice people. Every one has moments when they are nice and then there are some moments when they are assholes. Being nice to pull the chick is unnatural and females can feel it so they repel themselves from you. Because usually when a person is always nice they have a hidden agenda or they don't feel comfortable around you cuz they cant be themselves. You ever notice the closest people in your life are the ones you can be yourself around same goes with dating.
Flash forward nine years later after I learned this lesson. I'm now dating the female that through me in the friend zone when I first went to college. We started spending time with each other again and this time I acted the same way I acted with the females I wasn't feeling.
Now truth be told some of the reason why we weren't together was because she wasn't ready to be in a relationship with a guy like me. She later revealed that she had self esteem issues and didn't feel like she deserve to be with a guy that looked out for her and that she was used to being with men that were callous towards her. Sometimes that's an issue. Bottomline you can't be afraid to NOT get the pussy.
Yeh thats right not get the pussy your desire for the pussy makes you do extra shit thats not neccessary and will mess up your chances. Behave as if you already fucked her. Thats why dudes that have four five side bitches get so much play cuz if they talk to a female that aint trying to holla back he cool cuz he got more the side that will fuck him. Women can sense a thirsty nigga.
Well you can predict what happen at that point ... Yep got thrown right in the friend zone. I chalked it up as a lost but kept in touch with her from that point on as a friend. Began talking to other females and the ones that I had no interest in I just chopped it up with them like they were home boys that I knew from high school. I wouldn't censor myself around them said what ever came to mind i said it. if a sexual thought came to mind I would say it. If i thought they were full of shit I would tell em. If they wanted me to do something for them and I didn't feel like it I would say it. If they stepped out of line I would check em. And do you know those females were the ones that wanted to fuck me the most.
What I am trying to say is there is no such thing as a nice guy. There a nice acts nice objects but not nice people. Every one has moments when they are nice and then there are some moments when they are assholes. Being nice to pull the chick is unnatural and females can feel it so they repel themselves from you. Because usually when a person is always nice they have a hidden agenda or they don't feel comfortable around you cuz they cant be themselves. You ever notice the closest people in your life are the ones you can be yourself around same goes with dating.
Flash forward nine years later after I learned this lesson. I'm now dating the female that through me in the friend zone when I first went to college. We started spending time with each other again and this time I acted the same way I acted with the females I wasn't feeling.
Now truth be told some of the reason why we weren't together was because she wasn't ready to be in a relationship with a guy like me. She later revealed that she had self esteem issues and didn't feel like she deserve to be with a guy that looked out for her and that she was used to being with men that were callous towards her. Sometimes that's an issue. Bottomline you can't be afraid to NOT get the pussy.
Yeh thats right not get the pussy your desire for the pussy makes you do extra shit thats not neccessary and will mess up your chances. Behave as if you already fucked her. Thats why dudes that have four five side bitches get so much play cuz if they talk to a female that aint trying to holla back he cool cuz he got more the side that will fuck him. Women can sense a thirsty nigga.
Good shit! Fear of rejection is something many men need to and have overcome. And this does not only go for getting women. It goes for getting money, power, job, goals, etc.
damn son, shit made me laugh out loud
the truth is "girls" don't know what they want at that age, most think they do, but they don't. what's ever popular at the time is what will be attractive to them. unfortunately, most of them grow up with that mind set.in the 90's newark and nyc it was the hustlers. them cats got most of the dime pieces
i remember reading an interview with pepa denton(salt-n-pepa) she said something along the line of how she wishes she would have dated will smith years ago(he actually had a crush on her and asked her out). she dissed him of course("he was corny"/not "thug" enough for her
i plead the fifth on that poem shit
You mean in the 90's it was hustlers and light skin Al b Sure ass niggas.
and yeah once a simp always a simp... Tuckdog been a simp from day one
Disclaimer: This is not intended to be a black women bashing thread. I have love for all black women and I am just asking a question that has perplexed me for as long as I remember. Ladies, I would like your input just as much as I would like the fellas input.
Ok fam. We've all gotten our laugh on this Christmas thanks to LES's thread and Ten's devious ass bumping his year old thread. However, the thread sparked an interesting question. Why do women, especially black women, prefer players and thugs over "nice guys"?
Speaking from personal experiences, I was once the "nice guy". I was raised solely by my mother, who I adored, and she taught me all about being respectful, loving, and caring towards other women. When I was old enough to start pursuing girls, this is how I carried myself towards them. From about 11 to 16, I was the nigga writing poems, opening doors, and just being an overall good dude to chicks thinking that's what they want (moms is never wrong right?).
Needless to say, that shit got me nowhere. Around 15/16 I started hanging out with older cats, listening to there stories, and they schooled me on what I was doing wrong. The niggas that treated girls like absolute shit had to beat them off with a stick just to walk the streets. At the same time, I began listening to my mother and her friends when they in the crib sippin E&J, and I would always hear them talking about how a nigga was too nice for them, and they wouldn't be calling them back.
I collected all this info, and rearranged my whole steez. Of course, when I stopped taking chicks calls, talking to other broads right in front of the chicks that I was messing with, and acting like a complete asshole, my dating life did a complete 360.
To make a very long story short, I'm out of the dating game and happily married, but that question has never left my mind. Why do a lot of women like to be treated like shit? And fellas, when did you realize that the "nice guy" role wasn't cutting it, and what did you do about it?
What I got from that is, a simp is never honest, because he always agree's with the woman. Even if it is something he disagree's with internally, instead of being honest about it, he would put on a smile and agree with her every whim.
if u think being an asshole is gonna get u women u are sadly mistaken
even if u think u found a woman who likes it....why would u want to invite that negative energy in your relationship or life for that matter
i love nice guys...but i dont want a push over
if i sense that if we get mugged u will run away or be unable to protect me im turned off
if i sense that if someone disrespects me while we are out it will be up to me to handle the situation im turned off
if i sense that if we get poor service at a resturant i will have to be the one to ensure we get what we paid for i will be turned off
i am assertive...i get what i want and get shit done...however i do not want to be the dominate one...i do not have a penis
its not about being "nice" its about being able to provide security...women just don't say it and express it correctly...and it doesnt help that many women do not have positive examples of what a man should be
I keep saying it time and again.
K
kwazdog
Guest
I think many do it because they have an inferiority complex. They cant possibly respect a man that respects them because they know that they are "lesser beings". A woman may say subconsciously "That nigga that treats me like shit is smart enough to know that I am not on the same tier as him as an Sentient being, I need him to rule me for I am not capable of ruling my own inner kingdom effectively". I'm not saying this is true but I suspect this is what goes on deep in most women's psyche.
this might be petty but i honestly believe that NO man under the age of 30-32 should get married or into a serious relationship and NO woman should either until she is at least 25-27
its almost pathetic when im djing these partys and when i play beyonce single ladies how many women in they mid 30's got the hands up celebrating being single but deep inside hate it.....
live a little, see the world, taste the different flavors...then when ready settle down
and the age difference in my earlier example is of course because women mature faster than men........
just my 2cents
its almost pathetic when im djing these partys and when i play beyonce single ladies how many women in they mid 30's got the hands up celebrating being single but deep inside hate it.....
live a little, see the world, taste the different flavors...then when ready settle down
and the age difference in my earlier example is of course because women mature faster than men........
just my 2cents
K
kwazdog
Guest
Fatherless Women: What Happens to the Adult Woman who was Raised Without her Father?
%wise
Little girls who live without a father do so not only due to death, abandonment, or divorce, but also due to physically present fathers but who are emotionally absent, or ill over a lengthy period of time in some way (clinical depression, terminal disease, etc.), or because the father is a workaholic, or because in some fashion the father is a disappointment to the daughter, as might be the case in a weak or ineffectual father. Such differing types of absence in the girl's life may have major consequences of varying kinds, since a healthy emotional and socio-psychological developmental trajectory in the early years of life does require some type of positive paternal role model.
Seeing the Self Reflected
Optimally, a little girl needs to see herself reflected in the love she sees for herself in her father's eyes. This is how she develops self confidence and self esteem. This is how she develops a healthy familiarity with what a positive expression of love feels like. This is how she develops an appreciation for her own looks, her own body. This is how she develops what Jungians would call her 'animus,' her counter-sexual self; her masculine self, which will help her be proactive, productive, and creative in the outer world as she grows into adulthood.
If, however, the little girl does not have such a relationship with the father, if she sees rejection or emotional coldness or withdrawal in him, or if he simply is not available at all, her sense of self will be tainted, her self confidence warped or non-existent, her portrait of a loving relationship may be distorted or dysfunctional, and she may find herself - no matter how pretty, vivacious, lovable, funny, or intelligent - lacking in appeal.
Belief in the Self
Clearly, self confidence and self esteem can be forged through one's own endeavors during the life course, even if a father has not been present, but the path to success in such endeavors, and the reasons for which they are even attempted, tend to be quite different in the adult woman who was raised with a positive relationship to her father, as opposed to the one who was not. The former may excel simply because she believes in herself, while the latter needs to excel in order to catch a glimpse of approval and recognition in the eyes of those who give her a message of approval, honor, or prestige. The value of such a belief in oneself, easily acquired by the woman with a positive relationship to her father, is immeasurable in the adult life, and the lack of it in many of the countless women who were raised without a positive father image, may cause the life course to be fraught with difficulties.
The Multi-faceted Arena of Relationships
Perhaps the arena in which the most painful process of learning how to deal with the early lack of a father is played out is in that of relationships. If a girl has not been assured of her value as a woman by that early relationship with the father, she finds it difficult to relate to men precisely because she may often unconsciously seek to find that recognition in the eyes of the beloved…and this may lead her down an early path of promiscuity... which in turn makes her feel she is “bad”, but on she marches, relentlessly visiting bed after bed, locking in a fierce embrace with man after man, in the hope that this one or that one, or the next one will finally give her that which she never had as a child - validation of herself for herself.
Marrying 'Daddy'
Other women may choose another route, falling in love with an older man and thus marrying 'daddy.' At this point many different scenarios may ensue. If the man is at all psychologically aware (something often, but not always lacking in older men who like younger girls), he may have a vague inkling of what is going on. Therefore, once she starts - within the secure confines of the relationship or marriage - the process of growth, which will inevitably lead her to separate from her husband in some ways that are emotionally and psychologically necessary in order for her become her own woman, he will not blanch in fear at this process, and allow her the necessary space and freedom to do so. In that case, the marriage will in all likelihood thrive and continue to grow. If, however, the man is not aware, and sees her search for growth as a threat to the superiority he felt upon marrying a young, and as yet undeveloped woman, he will attempt to stifle her, to manipulate her psychologically by making her believe she is worthless, silly, or, and this appears to be a perennial favorite, that she "needs professional help in order to calm down and behave like she used to before."
Avoiding Engaging the Emotions
Examples here abound: the maiden aunt, who dedicates her life to her nieces and nephews, or who becomes a teacher and dedicates her life to her career; the nun, who dedicates her life to God, or the prostitute, who, although she may engage her body, rarely engages her emotions. Another example is that of the eternal seductress, who needs to remain in control by seducing the man and never actually involving her own feelings. A slightly more difficult to recognize version of the same scenario is played out by the woman who consistently has relationships with married men who never leave their respective wives for her. On an unconscious level this suits her just fine because it gives her the perfect excuse never to have to commit herself totally.
Finding Self-Confidence and Recognition in the Self
The core of the matter is, of course, that the self-confidence and recognition so avidly sought must be found within oneself rather than in the outer world - at least initially - in order to be of lasting and true value. The world of emotions that is avoided out of fear or because one never really learned what love is, must first be found in oneself (i.e. it is necessary to love the self before one loves another). The task of accomplishing this, requires that the individual become aware of him or herself (by observing the self, the self-talk, and all emotions that occur, good or bad, since all of these serve to give clues about the true self), and that absolute honesty about oneself be employed in this process. Let the reader be warned: this process is not a simple weekend project; it must be ongoing throughout life; it must become second nature, but it will pave the road to finding inner self-confidence and love for oneself, which will in turn lead to the abolishment of the need for finding these things in another. This is one of the roads to inner freedom that psychological knowledge offers
http://www.bgol.us/board/showthread.php?t=512304
%wise
Little girls who live without a father do so not only due to death, abandonment, or divorce, but also due to physically present fathers but who are emotionally absent, or ill over a lengthy period of time in some way (clinical depression, terminal disease, etc.), or because the father is a workaholic, or because in some fashion the father is a disappointment to the daughter, as might be the case in a weak or ineffectual father. Such differing types of absence in the girl's life may have major consequences of varying kinds, since a healthy emotional and socio-psychological developmental trajectory in the early years of life does require some type of positive paternal role model.
Seeing the Self Reflected
Optimally, a little girl needs to see herself reflected in the love she sees for herself in her father's eyes. This is how she develops self confidence and self esteem. This is how she develops a healthy familiarity with what a positive expression of love feels like. This is how she develops an appreciation for her own looks, her own body. This is how she develops what Jungians would call her 'animus,' her counter-sexual self; her masculine self, which will help her be proactive, productive, and creative in the outer world as she grows into adulthood.
If, however, the little girl does not have such a relationship with the father, if she sees rejection or emotional coldness or withdrawal in him, or if he simply is not available at all, her sense of self will be tainted, her self confidence warped or non-existent, her portrait of a loving relationship may be distorted or dysfunctional, and she may find herself - no matter how pretty, vivacious, lovable, funny, or intelligent - lacking in appeal.
Belief in the Self
Clearly, self confidence and self esteem can be forged through one's own endeavors during the life course, even if a father has not been present, but the path to success in such endeavors, and the reasons for which they are even attempted, tend to be quite different in the adult woman who was raised with a positive relationship to her father, as opposed to the one who was not. The former may excel simply because she believes in herself, while the latter needs to excel in order to catch a glimpse of approval and recognition in the eyes of those who give her a message of approval, honor, or prestige. The value of such a belief in oneself, easily acquired by the woman with a positive relationship to her father, is immeasurable in the adult life, and the lack of it in many of the countless women who were raised without a positive father image, may cause the life course to be fraught with difficulties.
The Multi-faceted Arena of Relationships
Perhaps the arena in which the most painful process of learning how to deal with the early lack of a father is played out is in that of relationships. If a girl has not been assured of her value as a woman by that early relationship with the father, she finds it difficult to relate to men precisely because she may often unconsciously seek to find that recognition in the eyes of the beloved…and this may lead her down an early path of promiscuity... which in turn makes her feel she is “bad”, but on she marches, relentlessly visiting bed after bed, locking in a fierce embrace with man after man, in the hope that this one or that one, or the next one will finally give her that which she never had as a child - validation of herself for herself.
Marrying 'Daddy'
Other women may choose another route, falling in love with an older man and thus marrying 'daddy.' At this point many different scenarios may ensue. If the man is at all psychologically aware (something often, but not always lacking in older men who like younger girls), he may have a vague inkling of what is going on. Therefore, once she starts - within the secure confines of the relationship or marriage - the process of growth, which will inevitably lead her to separate from her husband in some ways that are emotionally and psychologically necessary in order for her become her own woman, he will not blanch in fear at this process, and allow her the necessary space and freedom to do so. In that case, the marriage will in all likelihood thrive and continue to grow. If, however, the man is not aware, and sees her search for growth as a threat to the superiority he felt upon marrying a young, and as yet undeveloped woman, he will attempt to stifle her, to manipulate her psychologically by making her believe she is worthless, silly, or, and this appears to be a perennial favorite, that she "needs professional help in order to calm down and behave like she used to before."
Avoiding Engaging the Emotions
Examples here abound: the maiden aunt, who dedicates her life to her nieces and nephews, or who becomes a teacher and dedicates her life to her career; the nun, who dedicates her life to God, or the prostitute, who, although she may engage her body, rarely engages her emotions. Another example is that of the eternal seductress, who needs to remain in control by seducing the man and never actually involving her own feelings. A slightly more difficult to recognize version of the same scenario is played out by the woman who consistently has relationships with married men who never leave their respective wives for her. On an unconscious level this suits her just fine because it gives her the perfect excuse never to have to commit herself totally.
Finding Self-Confidence and Recognition in the Self
The core of the matter is, of course, that the self-confidence and recognition so avidly sought must be found within oneself rather than in the outer world - at least initially - in order to be of lasting and true value. The world of emotions that is avoided out of fear or because one never really learned what love is, must first be found in oneself (i.e. it is necessary to love the self before one loves another). The task of accomplishing this, requires that the individual become aware of him or herself (by observing the self, the self-talk, and all emotions that occur, good or bad, since all of these serve to give clues about the true self), and that absolute honesty about oneself be employed in this process. Let the reader be warned: this process is not a simple weekend project; it must be ongoing throughout life; it must become second nature, but it will pave the road to finding inner self-confidence and love for oneself, which will in turn lead to the abolishment of the need for finding these things in another. This is one of the roads to inner freedom that psychological knowledge offers
http://www.bgol.us/board/showthread.php?t=512304
subs for later
You said all this:
Just to negate it by saying:
So basically at the end of the day you being a gentleman wasn't the issue, it was her low self esteem that was. When you were acting like a jerk you were attracting women who also had low self esteem issues therefore you were upping your pussy rate but you weren't building anything meaningful or being able to be who you wanted to be. That's why telling guys to change who they are to please these women is bad because you stop them from finding someone who is compatible with their true selves.
Just to negate it by saying:
So basically at the end of the day you being a gentleman wasn't the issue, it was her low self esteem that was. When you were acting like a jerk you were attracting women who also had low self esteem issues therefore you were upping your pussy rate but you weren't building anything meaningful or being able to be who you wanted to be. That's why telling guys to change who they are to please these women is bad because you stop them from finding someone who is compatible with their true selves.
its sad cycle that need to be broken but sadly i think its more of a gentic thing with females more than upbringing and maturity tho. maturity do play a factor but i think gentics is the leading factor for this. my mother even went through it and a few of my homegirls is in this phase of the bad ninjas.
im sure ninjas in here know females who messed with ninjas who treated them like garbage and cheated on them while the female believe that he was the perfect match for her (chemistry
). thats why i believe that chemistry stuff between a male and female is bullshit. because you can have the perfect chemistry with an asshole and he will still treat you like shit but you will ignore the obvious signs. i can tell which ninja my homegirls/ female friends mess with that is about that nut and which is genuinely interested in her. but its not my position to get involved, so i fall back.co-sign.
this makes no sense and its a contradiction. men under 30 should be in a relationship but females 25 and up should be in a relationship?
thats two opposites clashing.no offense but did you sit down and thought about this because its a conflicting thought within a thought if that even makes sense.
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Another poster already clarified what a true simp was. Being a nice guy is not a simp. It is a guy who knows how to give mutual respect and unfortunately there are many women out there who don't know how to appreciate it. So guess what?
I don't deal with them. I like women who are intelligent and likes respect like a man. What real man doesn't like and enjoy respect???
I don't deal with them. I like women who are intelligent and likes respect like a man. What real man doesn't like and enjoy respect???
I'm 32 and since getting on Facebook, I've encountered this mentality from a number of women I went to high school and college with!
this is true,know a cat about 31 or 32
lives with his parents,no job,has a 02 beamer that he still owes a note on & the tranny is fucked,but he got no money to fix it.
yet this cat is always scoping out new beamers,prob cause he thinks thats what will get him laid