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The Nice Nigga Theory

tuckdog

tuckdog

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Disclaimer: This is not intended to be a black women bashing thread. I have love for all black women and I am just asking a question that has perplexed me for as long as I remember. Ladies, I would like your input just as much as I would like the fellas input. :cool:

Ok fam. We've all gotten our laugh on this Christmas thanks to LES's thread and Ten's devious ass bumping his year old thread. However, the thread sparked an interesting question. Why do women, especially black women, prefer players and thugs over "nice guys"?

Speaking from personal experiences, I was once the "nice guy". I was raised solely by my mother, who I adored, and she taught me all about being respectful, loving, and caring towards other women. When I was old enough to start pursuing girls, this is how I carried myself towards them. From about 11 to 16, I was the nigga writing poems, opening doors, and just being an overall good dude to chicks thinking that's what they want (moms is never wrong right?).

Needless to say, that shit got me nowhere. Around 15/16 I started hanging out with older cats, listening to there stories, and they schooled me on what I was doing wrong. The niggas that treated girls like absolute shit had to beat them off with a stick just to walk the streets. At the same time, I began listening to my mother and her friends when they in the crib sippin E&J, and I would always hear them talking about how a nigga was too nice for them, and they wouldn't be calling them back.

I collected all this info, and rearranged my whole steez. Of course, when I stopped taking chicks calls, talking to other broads right in front of the chicks that I was messing with, and acting like a complete asshole, my dating life did a complete 360.

To make a very long story short, I'm out of the dating game and happily married, but that question has never left my mind. Why do a lot of women like to be treated like shit? And fellas, when did you realize that the "nice guy" role wasn't cutting it, and what did you do about it? :cool:
 
oh and on your thread topic, I really dont understand why women do that, and then get mad at havin the kid by the thug and getting dogged
 
thereason said:
oh and on your thread topic, I really dont understand why women do that, and then get mad at havin the kid by the thug and getting dogged
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Only to raise another fatherless child who will either A) Turn into the same thug that his daddy was or B) Turn into the same type of woman (like her mom) that wants the type of thug for a mate (like her dad). Very sickening cycle. :smh:
 
good question i sure would love to see what bgol got to say about this because my story is similar to yours


To be honest with you when it came to the ladies i always was the dude that would go the extra mile to impress or please them until i hit the age of around i would say 16........ I had a rep as a sucka i guess i mean im not going lie but then after awhile i was like man fuck these bitches im just about a nut thats when the pussy piled in. Me and my niggaz was none as dogs bitches would talk mad shit but at the same time i had no problem smashing it was strange like that.


I think females see a nice nigga as being desperate instead of just being nice and raised right. They think you weak or not man enough if u do things like hold doors or any kinds of acts of chivalry. I also think it was because the women was young in the mind. Now i kinda switched up the routine again now that im older i know who will get treated like a lady and who will get treated like a slut just by conversation.
 
MrAvon_Streetz said:
I think females see a nice nigga as being desperate instead of just being nice and raised right. They think you weak or not man enough if u do things like hold doors or any kinds of acts of chivalry. I also think it was because the women was young in the mind. Now i kinda switched up the routine again now that im older i know who will get treated like a lady and who will get treated like a slut just by conversation.
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That's an interesting point. The fact that you said that women would think that the man was weak is one of the reasons why the black family structure is becoming almost non-existent. If I was a woman, i'd think that a nigga that couldn't keep a steady source of income, couldn't stay out of jail, and couldn't control his dick was weak.
 
Here is a good explanation.


Women, you can look at it like sports.

Women in their 30's still think they have the value of a number one draft pickwho is in their prime. When they were in their prime and got drafted they were selfish and held out because they were like I don't want to play on that team(average good guy)even though their skill set would have matched perfectly with this team(good guy). Instead they decided to force a trade and sign on draft day to play for the glamorous team(bad guy/playa)in which their skill set was a terrible match. They end up on a team with bad chemistry and complain why they are not winning(married). They end up getting traded to another team with the same results. Now when you look back at their 13 year career. She was a parade All American number one draft pick who never won anything(married) been traded to 8 different teams(Passed around by niggas) and injuries that hold her back(kids)While the second draft pick took the opportunity to play with the first team(good guy) and won multiple titles(married with a great husband/family) Now they are in their 30's and still trying to reupthat number one draft pickmoney. Teams(niggas) laugh at her silly ass offers..and offer her the vet minimum(Jump Off)
 
no colin powell :furious::colin:

a dude should never change himself to get with some broad, if he identifies himself as a "nice guy" b/c that is how he expresses himself and who he chooses to be, then keep doing you and deal with women who like that...alot of women will agree with this,many will only b/c it does not implicate them in their choices and resulting consequences...


its not that men who change from being "nice guys" need to impress women, the men need to impress themselves and know who they really are and like some of those women who like you....changing yourself for yourself is your first priority, benefits are not guaranteed....some women are ruthless in that they use some men as safety nets after they get done fucking around and thats where the simp brainwashing comes in.....if she really cared she would school her son for real.....like many black mothers have their sons...

the female of any species is turned on by aggression, they also can be scared of aggression. The difference with some human females is that they can get with dudes hoping they can change him or whatever b/c the mans aggression turns her on .....she cant say the same for the dude who is aggressively in those books or goals in life....now some women just want to fuck around and thats cool, as long as they choose to deal with the consequences head on instead of blaming all black men or trying to incite some capt save a hoe ass nigga with her "their is no good black men" bullshit....then playing victim...


bottomline is this, I learned a long time ago not to be mad at women for their choices in men, but to hold them to the consequences....men get this treatment by default, ie "be a man" and the like....if you listen to the dialogue and bullshit that these women say and do not say, its all about her dealing with her choices and looking to blame a man,or get saved by one, aint got shit to do with the men, if it did she would ask them and would hope that they dont hold back......

but they dont ask, instead they buy books from dudes who tell em what they want to hear and ignore the dude without an agenda, ie regular niggas....smh.....


the more I respect myself and see myself for what I am, the more transparent alot of women become....aint shit to figure out but yourself....
 
tuckdog said:
That's an interesting point. The fact that you said that women would think that the man was weak is one of the reasons why the black family structure is becoming almost non-existent. If I was a woman, i'd think that a nigga that couldn't keep a steady source of income, couldn't stay out of jail, and couldn't control his dick was weak.
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this is a good point, but it aint about what we think, its about the chocies women make and the consequences....alot of times we get caught up in trying to prove them illogical...cardinal mistake,they know what they are doing, they just scared of the outcome, hence all the rage and blaming...fuck that shit homie, do you...they just want your attention like its boo season...
 
info said:
no colin powell :furious::colin:

a dude should never change himself to get with some broad, if he identifies himself as a "nice guy" b/c that is how he expresses himself and who he chooses to be, then keep doing you and deal with women who like that...alot of women will agree with this,many will only b/c it does not implicate them in their choices and resulting consequences...


its not that men who change from being "nice guys" need to impress women, the men need to impress themselves and know who they really are and like some of those women who like you....changing yourself for yourself is your first priority, benefits are not guaranteed....some women are ruthless in that they use some men as safety nets after they get done fucking around and thats where the simp brainwashing comes in.....if she really cared she would school her son for real.....like many black mothers have their sons...

the female of any species is turned on by aggression, they also can be scared of aggression. The difference with some human females is that they can get with dudes hoping they can change him or whatever b/c the mans aggression turns her on .....she cant say the same for the dude who is aggressively in those books or goals in life....now some women just want to fuck around and thats cool, as long as they choose to deal with the consequences head on instead of blaming all black men or trying to incite some capt save a hoe ass nigga with her "their is no good black men" bullshit....then playing victim...


bottomline is this, I learned a long time ago not to be mad at women for their choices in men, but to hold them to the consequences....men get this treatment by default, ie "be a man" and the like....if you listen to the dialogue and bullshit that these women say and do not say, its all about her dealing with her choices and looking to blame a man,or get saved by one, aint got shit to do with the men, if it did she would ask them and would hope that they dont hold back......

but they dont ask, instead they buy books from dudes who tell em what they want to hear and ignore the dude without an agenda, ie regular niggas....smh.....


the more I respect myself and see myself for what I am, the more transparent alot of women become....aint shit to figure out but yourself....
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good shit bruh

yeah i think when i was younger i was to stupid to realize that i was treating the wrong women right there for i got pissed and label them all as not being shit.......luckily when i got order i realized my mistake
 
I think you meant it did a 180. 360 is a circle and brings you back to exactly where you were in the first place.
 
tuckdog said:
That's an interesting point. The fact that you said that women would think that the man was weak is one of the reasons why the black family structure is becoming almost non-existent. If I was a woman, i'd think that a nigga that couldn't keep a steady source of income, couldn't stay out of jail, and couldn't control his dick was weak.
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But you have to understand that a lot of these women do not have a positive male role model in the house to demonstrate how a Man should treat a Woman. So what happens is they grow up fatherless and then SOCIETY shows them how Men should treat them which is he cause of the issue we have now. If more fathers would raise their kids, the kids would see how a positive male/female relationship should be. American culture should never raise our children because American culture ain't shit.
 
chemist said:
Here is a good explanation.


Women, you can look at it like sports.

Women in their 30's still think they have the value of a number one draft pickwho is in their prime. When they were in their prime and got drafted they were selfish and held out because they were like I don't want to play on that team(average good guy)even though their skill set would have matched perfectly with this team(good guy). Instead they decided to force a trade and sign on draft day to play for the glamorous team(bad guy/playa)in which their skill set was a terrible match. They end up on a team with bad chemistry and complain why they are not winning(married). They end up getting traded to another team with the same results. Now when you look back at their 13 year career. She was a parade All American number one draft pick who never won anything(married) been traded to 8 different teams(Passed around by niggas) and injuries that hold her back(kids)While the second draft pick took the opportunity to play with the first team(good guy) and won multiple titles(married with a great husband/family) Now they are in their 30's and still trying to reupthat number one draft pickmoney. Teams(niggas) laugh at her silly ass offers..and offer her the vet minimum(Jump Off)
Click to expand...

:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol: :yes::yes::yes::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
 
As you get older, you realized that if a woman does not want you to hold doors for her or be nice, then she's an asshole.

I can be rude and mean with the best of em but that shit is not my default.
 
women fuck who they want to fuck and 9 times out of 10 its the dude they are most compatible with....if he dont give a fuck about nothin then she does not have to pull any weight or hold responsibilities...a "dont give a fuck" type of dude could be a dude with or without money, its all about mentality...we need to start promoting the notion of not trippin and moving towards goals...everybody is at fault, fathers and mothers..
 
women love excitement and adventure they don't wanna fuck no boring squares
they want a man who they feel can protect them and their kids
 
Deuterion said:
But you have to understand that a lot of these women do not have a positive male role model in the house to demonstrate how a Man should treat a Woman.
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I want to believe that, but a lot of women who may not grow up in a household like that should at least have common sense enough to know that they should be treated right. Do they not respect themselves enough to have that basic understanding? No one ever had to tell me to seek out relationships (romantic or otherwise) that were good for me and I didn't grow up in a 2 parent household. I would think that the basic law of self preservation would force them to seek out the healthiest relationships possible.

Deuterion said:
So what happens is they grow up fatherless and then SOCIETY shows them how Men should treat them which is he cause of the issue we have now. If more fathers would raise their kids, the kids would see how a positive male/female relationship should be. American culture should never raise our children because American culture ain't shit.
Click to expand...

I can't really blame it on society either because it doesn't seem that other races suffer from this problem on a wide scale.
 
the premise of doing some shit as a "nice guy"
or a "bad boy" is that it is done to attract the woman.....men dont differentiate between the 2 unless something else is goin on in his head...
the best women are those who come on their own free will without strings attached (they exist) not doing "good things" or "bad things" just to get some pussy....

there are alot of street dudes who fit the "bad boy" mold who get hustled or worse by women so it aint shit....alot of women are intimidated by a self respecting dude.....it aint got shit to do with how we see ourselves but whether or not the women are gonna deal with the consequences of their choices without bitching and moaning..
 
chemist said:
Here is a good explanation.


Women, you can look at it like sports.

Women in their 30's still think they have the value of a number one draft pickwho is in their prime. When they were in their prime and got drafted they were selfish and held out because they were like I don't want to play on that team(average good guy)even though their skill set would have matched perfectly with this team(good guy). Instead they decided to force a trade and sign on draft day to play for the glamorous team(bad guy/playa)in which their skill set was a terrible match. They end up on a team with bad chemistry and complain why they are not winning(married). They end up getting traded to another team with the same results. Now when you look back at their 13 year career. She was a parade All American number one draft pick who never won anything(married) been traded to 8 different teams(Passed around by niggas) and injuries that hold her back(kids)While the second draft pick took the opportunity to play with the first team(good guy) and won multiple titles(married with a great husband/family) Now they are in their 30's and still trying to reupthat number one draft pickmoney. Teams(niggas) laugh at her silly ass offers..and offer her the vet minimum(Jump Off)
Click to expand...

john_madden_16962.jpg
 
ganjababy said:
women love excitement and adventure they don't wanna fuck no boring squares
they want a man who they feel can protect them and their kids
Click to expand...

it aint about what the women want or what the women say they want, its about why a dude should even feel like he has to change his habits in order to be acknowledged by some women in the first place...who convinced him he was not good enough to holla at some chick?? how can he rectify it???

women go through this shit when they are near 30 and want a husband, but no men want them.....
 
chemist said:
Here is a good explanation.


Women, you can look at it like sports.

Women in their 30's still think they have the value of a number one draft pickwho is in their prime. When they were in their prime and got drafted they were selfish and held out because they were like I don't want to play on that team(average good guy)even though their skill set would have matched perfectly with this team(good guy). Instead they decided to force a trade and sign on draft day to play for the glamorous team(bad guy/playa)in which their skill set was a terrible match. They end up on a team with bad chemistry and complain why they are not winning(married). They end up getting traded to another team with the same results. Now when you look back at their 13 year career. She was a parade All American number one draft pick who never won anything(married) been traded to 8 different teams(Passed around by niggas) and injuries that hold her back(kids)While the second draft pick took the opportunity to play with the first team(good guy) and won multiple titles(married with a great husband/family) Now they are in their 30's and still trying to reupthat number one draft pickmoney. Teams(niggas) laugh at her silly ass offers..and offer her the vet minimum(Jump Off)
Click to expand...


profound
 
info said:
it aint about what the women want or what the women say they want, its about why a dude should even feel like he has to change his habits in order to be acknowledged by some women in the first place...who convinced him he was not good enough to holla at some chick?? how can he rectify it???

women go through this shit when they are near 30 and want a husband, but no men want them.....
Click to expand...

funny how u have all this insight on women yet u still not fucking. Like I said maybe the problem is u not the women
 
Flawless said:
funny how u have all this insight on women yet u still not fucking. Like I said maybe the problem is u not the women
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Yo fam, we're trying to have grown folks convo in here. If you don't have anything positive to contribute just ignore the thread. :cool:
 
tuckdog said:
I can't really blame it on society either because it doesn't seem that other races suffer from this problem on a wide scale.
Click to expand...

I don't think it's restricted to a black or white hood/thug thing. Other cultures still promote marriage and 2 parent households although divorce rates are high in most cultures.

Simps come in every race. It's gender based and culturally based. The Woody Allen type dudes are in all races as are the James Bond type dudes that pull chicks. White college broads do the same thing. They want the bad boy rockers when they are younger. When they are ready to settle down they may settle for the Bill Gates types (and not about his money necessarily).
 
Flawless said:
funny how u have all this insight on women yet u still not fucking. Like I said maybe the problem is u not the women
Click to expand...

nigga are you reading what I am saying or are you projecting? Why are your tryin to get me on the defensive about who Im fuckin? the fuck is wrong with dudes today where they dont have reading comprehension..read it again homie:

it aint about what the women want or what the women say they want, its about why a dude should even feel like he has to change his habits in order to be acknowledged by some women in the first place...who convinced him he was not good enough to holla at some chick?? how can he rectify it???
Click to expand...

since the topic was about women of course imma say what I want but the core issue is men and how we can handle our shit, but back to the topic....


dudes need goals and shit in life and then decide what women they want to allow in it, not what woman whose life they want to be apart of, yeah women choose who they fuck but men choose who they marry...think from that angle....men have alot more to lose than the women do...
 
tuckdog said:
Disclaimer: This is not intended to be a black women bashing thread. I have love for all black women and I am just asking a question that has perplexed me for as long as I remember. Ladies, I would like your input just as much as I would like the fellas input. :cool:

Ok fam. We've all gotten our laugh on this Christmas thanks to LES's thread and Ten's devious ass bumping his year old thread. However, the thread sparked an interesting question. Why do women, especially black women, prefer players and thugs over "nice guys"?

Speaking from personal experiences, I was once the "nice guy". I was raised solely by my mother, who I adored, and she taught me all about being respectful, loving, and caring towards other women. When I was old enough to start pursuing girls, this is how I carried myself towards them. From about 11 to 16, I was the nigga writing poems, opening doors, and just being an overall good dude to chicks thinking that's what they want (moms is never wrong right?).

Needless to say, that shit got me nowhere. Around 15/16 I started hanging out with older cats, listening to there stories, and they schooled me on what I was doing wrong. The niggas that treated girls like absolute shit had to beat them off with a stick just to walk the streets. At the same time, I began listening to my mother and her friends when they in the crib sippin E&J, and I would always hear them talking about how a nigga was too nice for them, and they wouldn't be calling them back.

I collected all this info, and rearranged my whole steez. Of course, when I stopped taking chicks calls, talking to other broads right in front of the chicks that I was messing with, and acting like a complete asshole, my dating life did a complete 360.

To make a very long story short, I'm out of the dating game and happily married, but that question has never left my mind. Why do a lot of women like to be treated like shit? And fellas, when did you realize that the "nice guy" role wasn't cutting it, and what did you do about it? :cool:
Click to expand...


In 1 word... Honesty. A nice guy just simply cannot be honest with a woman.
 
tuckdog said:
When I was old enough to start pursuing girls, this is how I carried myself towards them. From about 11 to 16, I was the nigga writing poems, opening doors, and just being an overall good dude to chicks thinking that's what they want
Click to expand...


damn son, shit made me laugh out loud :lol: :lol:

the truth is "girls" don't know what they want at that age, most think they do, but they don't. what's ever popular at the time is what will be attractive to them. unfortunately, most of them grow up with that mind set. :rolleyes: in the 90's newark and nyc it was the hustlers. them cats got most of the dime pieces :smh: i was hopping the city bus with my bus pass, them niggas was riding benzos, sidekicks and jeeps with deep dish and bbs rims :hmm:

i remember reading an interview with pepa denton(salt-n-pepa) she said something along the line of how she wishes she would have dated will smith years ago(he actually had a crush on her and asked her out). she dissed him of course("he was corny"/not "thug" enough for her :rolleyes: ) who's corny now?

34fbc472-c678-44d6-3573-8f10ac185df1-News_FB_BTWB_SandraPepaDenton.jpg





i plead the fifth on that poem shit :hmm:


 
biggboye5000 said:
I don't think it's restricted to a black or white hood/thug thing. Other cultures still promote marriage and 2 parent households although divorce rates are high in most cultures.

Simps come in every race. It's gender based and culturally based. The Woody Allen type dudes are in all races as are the James Bond type dudes that pull chicks. White college broads do the same thing. They want the bad boy rockers when they are younger. When they are ready to settle down they may settle for the Bill Gates types (and not about his money necessarily).
Click to expand...

Damn, you are on point with this statement. Never looked at it like that. I guess black women fuck it up for themselves because they actually have children with their version of the rockers, which fucks them up when they are ready to settle with the stable cats who aren't looking for a ready made family.
 

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