Welp DJ got short time of freedom left, my sentence at Marriage State Correctional starts next month.
- Thread starter DJ
- Start date
So don't talk to married people about marriage, and don't talk to single people about marriage.
So I guess the only other thing to talk to is...
And what'll happen is "Yeah so I was thinking about getting marri
Ahem, opinionated ninja enters the chat:
If y'all haven't lived with each other, being all up under each other 24/7 will be challenging. Women's expectations tend to be more misaligned with reality. Their ideas for your behavior will be unreasonable. If you have a strong sense of self, you will know when to call her out on that. You will adjust.
I don't know how you feel about side chicks, but the idea of putting up with two female personalities concurrently is MADNESS to me
I used to vent to my friends, but what could they say to make things better? Not a whole lot. I stopped venting. Best thing I ever could do is keep people out my business.So don't talk to married people about marriage, and don't talk to single people about marriage.
So I guess the only other thing to talk to is...
And what'll happen is "Yeah so I was thinking about getting marri
Man I can't wait to get married again... this woman I'm with now is fckn amazing!
Before I met her anytime marriage was brought up I'd change the subject or say I'm not getting married again... God had another plan and was like "say homie my girl wanna holla at you..."
That was 4 months ago and we been rocking together ever since.
Just closed on our townhome, we both landed 6 figure jobs, and life couldn't be better. I can't begin to put into words how blessed I feel right now... shit is unreal and I'm so thankful
Before I met her anytime marriage was brought up I'd change the subject or say I'm not getting married again... God had another plan and was like "say homie my girl wanna holla at you..."
That was 4 months ago and we been rocking together ever since.
Just closed on our townhome, we both landed 6 figure jobs, and life couldn't be better. I can't begin to put into words how blessed I feel right now... shit is unreal and I'm so thankful
Congrats bro
Never thought I would get married but when you find the you know. Hopefully you found the right one.
Never go to bed mad
Never thought I would get married but when you find the you know. Hopefully you found the right one.
Never go to bed mad
Ahem, opinionated ninja enters the chat:
If y'all haven't lived with each other, being all up under each other 24/7 will be challenging. Women's expectations tend to be more misaligned with reality. Their ideas for your behavior will be unreasonable. If you have a strong sense of self, you will know when to call her out on that. You will adjust.
I don't know how you feel about side chicks, but the idea of putting up with two female personalities concurrently is MADNESS to me
We live together, have been for awhile now. Our gf is not really a side chick we are all monogamous to one another. Not to discredit your statement the shit is mad challenging and crazy, mind you I have 2 daughters that live with me so the estrogen levels in my home can be outta control at times. I have definitely learned compromise and understanding to levels that I never thought I was capable of. I argue about facts and they all wanna argue about feelings.
Congrats fam !
They say there is a lid for every pot !
A piece of paper ain’t changing shit. If the relationship was wack prior to marriage it will be wack after. If the relationship was sweet prior it will be sweet after the marriage ceremony.
I wish y’all much happiness!
I wish y’all much happiness!
A good woman is priceless.
Times four
Ninja you a cot damn superhero
I am chalk it up to me being able to adapt to my situation. Can't leave my kids, they are underage, can't leave my wife, it gonna cost me hella bread, can't leve the gf, it would be constant bs from the wife and the kids. In all reality we got a pretty great thing going on, everyone is happy and I can't complain at this point. My older daughter might have a clue that Ti-Ti more than just an extended family member, but that conversation is yet to come. My assumption is, as long as I am paying and providing for everyone in my house they all need to stfu, they all beg to differ though and feel like they're opinions matter.
Everyone needs a true friend and a trusted person to speak to about issues. But no, everyone doesn't need to be in your business.
But it's good to have a friend to speak to about issues to hear things from another perspective.
You should have eloped. We did and saved thousands of dollars. It sounds like she is a bridezilla, but hey you're trying to make her happy and I understand. Hopefully once this wedding is over y'all can settle into normalcy.
My sister's and my wife's family tried to take over everything and was putting a shit load of pressure on her so we said fuck it. Got married in front of a judge with her cousin as a witness and had greek food afterwards. Then I took her to Paris and sent the family pictures.
Wait? You're 52, marrying a 30 year old and you have a live in side chick?!?!?!
To be happy you must:
1- Keep others (Momma, Sister, Cousins and single ass friends) out of your marriage.
2- Don’t argue over money; it comes and it goes
3- Establish what your deal breakers are, ours is- infidelity, abuse of any kind and habitual lying
Other than that, enjoy it. It’s the single most important decision you will make in your life as it determines your future and wellbeing. Enjoy it, it’s not as bad as people make it out to be. As long as you are marrying a friend and not doing it due to pressure. Marriage is a beautiful thing!
1- Keep others (Momma, Sister, Cousins and single ass friends) out of your marriage.
2- Don’t argue over money; it comes and it goes
3- Establish what your deal breakers are, ours is- infidelity, abuse of any kind and habitual lying
Other than that, enjoy it. It’s the single most important decision you will make in your life as it determines your future and wellbeing. Enjoy it, it’s not as bad as people make it out to be. As long as you are marrying a friend and not doing it due to pressure. Marriage is a beautiful thing!
She don't live with us, she is our poly partner. She is our gf. We all been together a year. She will eventually move in if shit keeps going the way it is.
September 3rd will be our 1st year & nothings been hard at all.
So the one thing I will disagree with with this thread is the idea of not talking to other married people about marriage. The reason I'm saying that is that you should always remember that you're not the only one in a situation and how people handle their situation could be the blueprint about how you do go about doing it or just as importantly HOW YOU DON'T GO ABOUT DOING IT. So when people have advice or they tell you about a scenario they dealt with in their marriage I'll listen however always have the caveat that you don't have to take their advice at all.
I'll give a perfect example. Mutual friend of my brother and I recently got a divorce. The reason he got a divorce was because his wife found out about his side chick. She found out because he got upset that his side chick started dating a guy and his wife picked up on his mood his behavior and it made her suspicious and then she ended up finding out. At one point he was talking about what was going on and how upset he was getting and he was telling me and my brother this and we both looked at each other like that's some dumb shit. And it turned out to be dumb shit but we would never have seen it or known if we didn't talk to him about what he was upset about in his marriage.
I'll give a perfect example. Mutual friend of my brother and I recently got a divorce. The reason he got a divorce was because his wife found out about his side chick. She found out because he got upset that his side chick started dating a guy and his wife picked up on his mood his behavior and it made her suspicious and then she ended up finding out. At one point he was talking about what was going on and how upset he was getting and he was telling me and my brother this and we both looked at each other like that's some dumb shit. And it turned out to be dumb shit but we would never have seen it or known if we didn't talk to him about what he was upset about in his marriage.
Being married and mad that the side is now dating is the most mind boggling thing.....
Go ahead and date, that's less time she'd be begging him to spend with her.....
9@><[><[/2
All I can do is speak from my experience. The advice they have, I don't want it. Even from my closest smartest friends. I been on the verge of suicide and the best plan of action came from my damn self. Maybe my support system just sucks. Keep in mind, I been married almost 10 years.
Congrats! Only advice that I can give, always be willing to talk. Not argue. TALK! If you can't have a conversation about what is bothering either of you the relationship won't work. Try to never argue angry, write your feelings down and come back to talk about them. Arguing angry you're going to say something that you can't take back.
This is YOUR woman, you are HER man. Don't other people talk shyt about either of you to the other trying to poison the well. Not your or her family/friends. It's the two of you against the world.
This is YOUR woman, you are HER man. Don't other people talk shyt about either of you to the other trying to poison the well. Not your or her family/friends. It's the two of you against the world.
She is wife bridesmaid so she will be there. She will be taking care of my daughters while we go on our honeymoon. To be honest she has been a life saver for me going through all this, having that extra help has been great.
It's gonna be a year next month, and you were not lying.
This whole year has just been shit to do with my house constantly. New this, new that, paint this, paint that, like I just have all the free time in the world.
Majority of our arguments been about household shit not getting done and upgrades and improvements she wants.
I wanna tell her bitch if you dont like it here leave dammit !
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