The Official BGOL " All About Women" Thread....

read this awhile back...

From the website The Rawness

Why Black American Chicks Like Thugs

One thing I constantly hear educated black guys complain about is their experiences with black women, particularly how they constantly test them or pass them up for guys of a thuggier nature. The big complaint I hear is that black women, even those of middle class status and higher, seem to want “Tupac with a degree.” Black guys often use this as their reason for primarily dating women of other races.

Now of course most women of all races go through a “bad boy” stage, especially when they’re younger and attraction and excitement are more important to them than long-term security. One of the problems with black women though is that they tend to go overboard in this department. A bad boy to an Asian girl may be a guy who’s a liberal arts major. When black women go for a bad boys, however, a prison record and a gun are often be involved. I even found this to be the case when I was in college and hollering at educated black women. With white girls, though, the simple fact that a guy is black is often enough to confer “bad boy” status and make a guy edgy. So when a guy is faced with a choice of going for white girl and being edgy and a “bad boy” simply by being black and having a little bit of street smarts, or going for a black chick and having to be a “soldier” and risk a criminal record to impress a black chick with his edginess, it makes sense that a lot of black guys find it less stressful to date outside the race.

But I’m not writing this to excuse black men’s dating choices or condem black women, but rather to understand why this “thug lust” phenomenon is so prevalent in the black community. After doing a lot of reading on evolutionary psychology, I think I may have an answer.

One of the tenets of evolutionary psychology is that women are programmed to test men for strength and leadership. Constantly. The theory is that in prehistoric times, the world was a much more dangerous place, especially for women, who could easily be raped or killed at will. Weapons were primitive, there weren’t laws to protect rights and society was not very civilized. Women needed men that were strong and dominant to offer them protection from other men who may try to invade. For this reason, it was in a woman’s best interest to test a potential mate. If he was too weak to stand up to her and let her walk all over him, then how could he protect her and their children from other men? If he was wishy-washy in day to day activities, how could he make important decisions in a time of crisis?

Chances are, at some point in history there were not only plenty of women who were genetically predisposed to test men, but also plenty of women who were not genetically predisposed to test men. Thanks to the principles of survival of the fittest, however, the women who didn’t have the innate tendency to test their men probably chose weaker men and wound up getting their genes weeded out of existence once trouble came around and these weak men couldn’t protect them. On the flipside, the women with an innate tendency to test their men and not mate with punks were better suited for survival and ended up passing their genes to future generations of women. Thus as the human race evolved over time, women with “man-testing” genes thrived in the human population because they were beneficial to survival, while women without “man-testing” genes gradually ceased to exist because they were wiped out over time. For this reason, any woman alive today is descended from women with “man testing” genes and has these “man testing” genes too. This is why modern women constantly probe men in a million subtle ways for weakness and lack of leadership during the courtship process.

The irony is that civilization has evolved to a point where a man’s physical protection is not as necessary as it once was. Society is much more civilized, women have access to better weapons to level the playing field, policemen exist to add more protection, there are laws to protect female citizens and conquest of women and other men through brute force is not only frowned upon but actually illegal. So logically, man testing is not as necessary as it once was. However logic can’t change a woman’s genes or hundreds of thousands of years of cultural conditioning, both of which have bred her to test potential mates for leadership and strength. It is for this reason so many women are attracted to assholes. They may not be nice, but they will not stand for disrespect and will fight for their rights against other men. I also think this primal urge for men who don’t take shit plays a big role in why so many death row inmates have those women who write them love letters and are attracted to them: these men take no crap, are leaders in a bizarre way due to the fact that they refuse to conform to society’s rules and can offer a woman protection from outsiders in a way that the average, law-abiding man can’t. Even though logically a woman may know these assholes or thugs are a bad choice, biologically and culturally they’ve been bred through hundreds of thousands of years of evolution to respond positively to dominant, alpha male traits on a primal, unthinking level.

Now over the past few centuries as the West has become more civilized and women have made great strides in gaining equality, Western culture has begun training women to tone down their man-testing ways. Even though the man-testing genes are still there, they seem to play less of a role in mate choice with each generation. This is why that ugly kid from Superbad and Juno can actually be a sex symbol to tweens today. Alpha traits still matter to women on a primal level, but given how safe modern Western society has become for women over the past two centuries, and how much safer society continues to become for them, it’s safe to say that testing a man for alpha status will continue to decline and become more subtle and it will be increasingly easier for beta males to thrive in the mating game.

So what does this have to do with black women and thugs? The black woman for a long time was denied the societal progress available to other Western women over the past two centuries. Unlike other women in the West, for a long time black women did not experience the same increase in status and societal protection that would allow them to feel less dependent on the protections of a mate. Europeans invaded West Africa and took black people as slaves. Once in America, the black slave woman could be violated at will by her master and his visiting friends. This was acceptable under law. Her black husband could do nothing about this, which had to be very emasculating for him. In addition, she probably gradually began to resent him for his inability to protect her, even if logically she knew there was nothing he could actually do. This dynamic likely was passed to her daughters too, who had to grow up seeing both their fathers and their mates routinely emasculated and rendered incapable of protecting them. After slavery ended, things didn’t get that much better. The Ku Klux Klan was around in the south, lynchings and other forms of racial violence were rampant, black families could be physically intimidated and wiped out at will and the black man’s emasculation continued.

Given all the hardships a black woman faced up until very recent history, it would make sense that her need to test a man would remain strong, even as this need subsided some in Western women of other races. If anything, man-testing genes may have increased over the last several hundred years in the black community due to the hardships they faced. Getting an strong alpha male probably became much more important to a black woman than to a white woman, since unlike the white woman she did not have the same alternative protections of law, status and police available to her. I imagine that black women needed man-testing genes more than any other race of women because they were more reliant on the protection of a strong man than any other race of women because they couldn’t rely on societal protections. And out of all the strong types of black men available, I figure a thug was probably the type of alpha male that made her feel the safest. A thug was probably the type of black man most likely to stand up to the white man or other dangerous blacks even at the cost of his own life. I imagine that over the course of history, evolution and cultural conditioning rewarded man-testing genes in black women much more than it did in other races of women because strong, tough men were much more vital to a black woman’s survival. I also think that history and evolution were probably more unkind to black women who didn’t test their men for strength than it was to white women who didn’t test their men.

The second most popular type of man in the West is the beta provider. He’s not as dominant, as strong a leader or as tough as the alpha male, because he’s a beta male. But thanks to his intellectual prowess and his ability to provide financial support, he becomes the next best thing to the alpha dog. He offers a different type of security. It may not be as primally attractive to a woman as a tough, dominant alpha male, but it is a very safe and secure (if somewhat boring) secondary choice. Examples of beta male providers can be your wimpy scientists, male lawyers, educated, civilized guys, sucessful metrosexuals, nerds with poor social skills but good incomes, etc. They may not have as much to offer in primal attraction and physical protection, but they make up for it in their ability to provide security in the form of financial assistance. The catch is, a beta provider can only compete with alpha males in extremely civilized cultures were society offers women a sense of physical protection through the existence of cultural norms and legal protections. This allows things like financial security and education to become as important as alpha dog status. That is why being a beta provider can be so attractive to Western women, since society allows them the luxury of choosing a man for reasons other than brutish alpha dog status. If society ever reverted back to the dangerously harsh, brutish free-for-all it used to be in the old days, the stock of beta providers would drop drastically.

Since black women didn’t have the same societal protections as white Western women, beta providers were probably a bad choice in the black community for a long time, even as the stock of beta providers was on the rise in the white community. How much good could a square, law-abiding doctor or lawyer be to a black woman in the heart of the rural, racist south? His money doesn’t have that much benefit since many white businesses wouldn’t take it and he couldn’t move to any neighborhood he wanted, even if he could afford to. If anything, his education and intellect and legitimate financial success could be interpreted as being “uppity” and not “knowing his role,” thereby making him a target and putting the family in more danger from racist whites. For all these reasons, I think that black American women have evolved to have even more man-testing genes than other women, especially in favor of men who disregard the white man and his laws. In the black community, the tables have traditionally been stacked against the beta provider black male. Money in the hands of a black man just didn’t offer that much protection and wasn’t as valuable as being tough and macho and strong.

And it only got worse once the welfare state came into effect in the 1960s. Once Lyndon Johnson introduced the Great Society, allowing single women with children to get money and housing from the federal government, this took away one of the black beta provider’s last bargaining chips: his money and house. Now a black woman could get that financial security from the government. Not just that, but if she did get together with a beta provider, she’d actually lose her free money, food, house and education because you had to be single to receive those benefits. The welfare system actually created an incentive against settling down with a beta provider. He can’t provide the primal attraction and physical protection an alpha male does, and now his presence is actually an economic liability. And since a man was no longer as needed for economic reasons, this helped raised the stock of thugs: the physical protection from racist whites and other blacks in the ghetto, the superior sexual prowess, the primal attraction that comes from his role as a “bad boy” alpha male and the tax-free, under the table financial benefits of his illegal money.

Even though society has changed greatly for black women in the past few decades and they no longer face the same level of racism or need for an alpha dog thug for survival, they still have generations of these thug-loving genes and cultural conditioning to fight against. And of course the glamorization of thug life through hip-hop probably doesn’t help things either. And this is why even as many black women move up socially and get more educated, they still have such a strong pull toward thugs.

Holla!
 
This thread is essential for my current chick slump...bookmarking for sure:bravo:

Serious Knowledge here...Matter-fact, fuck my chick slump, theres just a ton of great "Life" advice and knowledge in this joint. Major props to the OP for starting this.
 
lil game...

by Roissy

Citizen Renegade

It Builds Character To Reject Women

If you are a man who has never rejected a woman for sex or dating, you are doing something wrong. You are, in fact, depriving yourself of one of life’s greatest pleasures and privileges, and avoiding a true test of your masculine mettle.

As we all know by now from the science, from common sense, and from reading my powerful words of genius, the default barter mechanism in the sexual market is female choice, male display. This is a natural consequence of the disparity between the scarcity of eggs and the surplus of sperm. But men are not entirely helpless to actively influence market prices; they choose as well. If men did not choose at all, women would not have evolved an instinct for improving their looks through fashion, makeup, and exercise. If I had to put a number on it, I’d say on average women do 70% of the choosing and men do 30% of the choosing. At the tails, the alpha-iest men do all the choosing and have to beat off their female suitors while the fattest, ugliest women must settle for whatever man will take them. The general trend, though, is upward dating for most women and a few men.

The fact of this mating dynamic explains why turning the tables and exercising male choice is such a powerful psychological game technique for seducing the minds of women. By behaving as if you are actively choosing women, and even occasionally rejecting them, you mimic the natural actions of the top 10% of men whose default mating strategy is choosing from an illimitable source of pussy and wielding the merciless power of sexual rejection.

Roissy Maxim #18: The two fundamental propositions upon which all game theory rests are male choosiness and female abundance. All alpha males have these two mindsets in common.

Corollary to the above: Male choosiness and female abundance do not necessarily have to be true for the strategy of behaving as if they are true to be effective at seducing women.

Try to put yourself in women’s shoes. When you are on a date, imagine you are a woman. Think like she would think. Feel like she would feel. Is this girl right for me? Are we compatible? What are her values? I’m just not sure if she’s the one; let’s see what else she has going for her. I need to keep my options open. I’m not ready to make a decision. I really need to be wowed, I wonder if she can do that for me. She seems kind of nervous. Is she dull? Am I out of her league? Damn, she just said something stupid. Maybe she’s not the one.

Keep thinking like this and soon your outward behavior will reflect your inward feelings. Suspend your disbeliefs long enough until they have become unshakeable beliefs. Once you have mastered the mindset of women, you will have mastered women themselves.

Roissy Maxim #19: The alpha male thinks and acts more like a woman than a man in matters of seduction. He understands his adversary’s psychology, and uses it to shatter her defenses.

The next time a woman who does not meet your attractiveness standards hits on you, humor her for a bit, lead her on, then politely reject her.

“What are you doing this Friday?”
“Oh, I should tell you I’m seeing someone.”

Do this even if you are hard up. Commanding the power of female/alpha male choosiness will enrich your soul and fortify your ego. You’ll feel bad for the girl for maybe 30 seconds, but the value-boosting afterglow will last for weeks. This is all about long-term thinking. Capture the female essence of sexual choice and make it a part of you.

Girls hitting on you is a rare event for most men, so you’ll need to be more active in your policy of preferential sexual consumerism. As long as you are dating two or more women simultaneously, you should have no qualms rejecting at least one of them for not being up to snuff. Choose one for dismissal and stop calling her for dates. It doesn’t have to be the least attractive chick; in fact, it’s more character-building and alpha-boosting to reject an attractive girl for an odd facial tic or bland personality. If she doesn’t get the hint, be candid and tell her she just isn’t right for you. Women, especially 7s and up, rarely hear this, so it will tear at her soul like the claws and teeth of an army of demons. If you can withstand the brief flicker of guilt and loss of sexual opportunity, her pain of rejection will actually feed your incipient alpha animal spirit, stengthening you, making you tougher, more appropriately detached, and able to clearly see and pursue your self-interest. Through the action of choosiness, your self-worth will skyrocket. And others’ evaluation of your worth will similarly follow.

If you believe there are “better” or more “moral” paths to alphaness, know this: Every alpha male is intimately familiar with the ego-stroking power of sexual choosiness. They have all, good and bad, enlightened and crass, rejected women in one way or another and crushed their souls, often on the flimsiest pretexts. Some are kind enough to dress it up in polite fictions; others are id monsters who flaunt their sexual despotism without regard for social convention or righteous preening. But all have lowered the boom. It goes with the territory.

The more women you reject, the more women will sense your radiating power to inflict pain and loss and subsequently want you. Buttress your inner game by being choosy, and rejecting freely.
 
Citizen Renegade

The Sixteen Commandments Of Poon
by Roissy

I. Never say ‘I Love You’ first

Women want to feel like they have to overcome obstacles to win a man’s heart. They crave the challenge of capturing the interest of a man who has other women competing for his attention, and eventually prevailing over his grudging reluctance to award his committed exclusivity. The man who gives his emotional world away too easily robs women of the satisfaction of earning his love. Though you may be in love with her, don’t say it before she has said it. Show compassionate restraint for her need to struggle toward yin fulfillment. Inspire her to take the leap for you, and she’ll return the favor a thousandfold.

II. Make her jealous

Flirt with other women in front of her. Do not dissuade other women from flirting with you. Women will never admit this but jealousy excites them. The thought of you turning on another woman will arouse her sexually. No girl wants a man that no other woman wants. The partner who harnesses the gale storm of jealousy controls the direction of the relationship.

III. You shall make your mission, not your woman, your priority

Forget all those romantic cliches of the leading man proclaiming his undying love for the woman who completes him. Despite whatever protestations to the contrary, women do not want to be “The One” or the center of a man’s existence. They in fact want to subordinate themselves to a worthy man’s life purpose, to help him achieve that purpose with their feminine support, and to follow the path he lays out. You must respect a woman’s integrity and not lie to her that she is “your everything”. She is not your everything, and if she is, she will soon not be anymore.

IV. Don’t play by her rules

If you allow a woman to make the rules she will resent you with a seething contempt even a rapist cannot inspire. The strongest woman and the most strident feminist wants to be led by, and to submit to, a more powerful man. Polarity is the core of a healthy loving relationship. She does not want the prerogative to walk all over you with her capricious demands and mercurial moods. Her emotions are a hurricane, her soul a saboteur. Think of yourself as a bulwark against her tempest. When she grasps for a pillar to steady herself against the whipping winds or yearns for an authority figure to foil her worst instincts, it is you who has to be there… strong, solid, unshakeable and immovable.

V. Adhere to the golden ratio

Give your woman 2/3 of everything she gives you. For every three calls or texts, give her two back. Three declarations of love earn two in return. Three gifts; two nights out. Give her two displays of affection and stop until she has answered with three more. When she speaks, you reply with fewer words. When she emotes, you emote less. The idea behind the golden ratio is twofold — it establishes your greater value by making her chase you, and it demonstrates that you have the self-restraint to avoid getting swept up in her personal dramas. Refraining from reciprocating everything she does for you in equal measure instills in her the proper attitude of belief in your higher status. In her deepest loins it is what she truly wants.

VI. Keep her guessing

True to their inscrutable natures, women ask questions they don’t really want direct answers to. Woe be the man who plays it straight — his fate is the suffering of the beta. Evade, tease, obfuscate. She thrives when she has to imagine what you’re thinking about her, and withers when she knows exactly how you feel. A woman may want financial and family security, but she does not want passion security. In the same manner, when she has displeased you, punish swiftly, but when she has done you right, reward slowly. Reward her good behavior intermittently and unpredictably and she will never tire of working hard to please you.

VII. Always keep two in the kitty

Never allow yourself to be a “kept man”. A man with options is a man without need. It builds confidence and encourages boldness with women if there is another woman, a safety net, to catch you in case you slip and risk a breakup, divorce, or a lost prospect, leading to loneliness and a grinding dry spell. A woman knows once she has slept with a man she has abdicated a measure of her power; when she has fallen in love with him she has surrendered nearly all of it. But love is ephemeral and with time she may rediscover her power and threaten to leave you. It is her final trump card. Withdrawing all her love and all her body in an instant will rend your soul if you are faced with contemplating the empty abyss alone. Knowing there is another you can turn to for affection will fortify your will and satisfy your manhood.

VIII. Say you’re sorry only when absolutely necessary

Do not say you’re sorry for every wrong thing you do. It is a posture of submission that no man should reflexively adopt, no matter how alpha he is. Apologizing increases the demand for more apologies. She will come to expect your contrition, like a cat expects its meal at a set time each day. And then your value will lower in her eyes. Instead, if you have done something wrong, you should acknowledge your guilt in a glancing way without resorting to the actual words “I’m sorry.” Pull the Bill Clinton maneuver and say “Mistakes were made” or tell her you “feel bad” about what you did. You are granted two freebie “I’m sorry”s for the life of your relationship; use them wisely.

IX. Connect with her emotions

Set yourself apart from other men and connect with a woman’s emotional landscape. Her mind is an alien world that requires deft navigation to reach your rendevous. Frolic in the surf of emotions rather than the arid desert of logic. Be playful. Employ all your senses. Describe in lush detail scenarios to set her heart afire. Give your feelings freedom to roam. ROAM. Yes, that is a good word. You’re not on a linear path with her. You are ROAMING all over, taking her on an adventure. In this world, there is no need to finish thoughts or draw conclusions. There is only need to EXPERIENCE. You’re grabbing her hand and running with her down an infinite, labyrinthine alleyway with no end, laughing and letting your fingers glide on the cobblestone walls along the way.

X. Ignore her beauty

The man who trains his mind to subdue the reward centers of his brain when reflecting upon a beautiful female face will magically transform his interactions with women. His apprehension and self-consciousness will melt away, paving the path for more honest and self-possessed interactions with the objects of his desire. This is one reason why the greatest lotharios drown in more love than they can handle — through positive experiences with so many beautiful women they lose their awe of beauty and, in turn, their powerlessness under its spell. It will help you acquire the right frame of mind to stop using the words hot, cute, gorgeous, or beautiful to describe girls who turn you on. Instead, say to yourself “she’s interesting” or “she might be worth getting to know”. Never compliment a girl on her looks, especially not a girl you aren’t fucking. Turn off that part of your brain that wants to put them on pedestals. Further advanced training to reach this state of unawed Zen transcendence is to sleep with many MANY attractive women (try to avoid sleeping with a lot of ugly women if you don’t want to regress). Soon, a Jedi lover you will be.

XI. Be irrationally self-confident

No matter what your station in life, stride through the world without apology or excuse. It does not matter if objectively you are not the best man a woman can get; what matters is that you think and act like you are. Women have a dog’s instinct for uncovering weakness in men; don’t make it easy for them. Self-confidence, warranted or not, triggers submissive emotional responses in women. Irrational self-confidence will get you more pussy than rational defeatism.

XII. Maximize your strengths, minimize your weaknesses

In the betterment of ourselves as men we attract women into our orbit. To accomplish this gravitational pull as painlessly and efficiently as possible, you must identify your natural talents and shortcomings and parcel your efforts accordingly. If you are a gifted jokester, don’t waste time and energy trying to raise your status in philosophical debate. If you write well but dance poorly, don’t kill yourself trying to expand your manly influence on the dancefloor. Your goal should be to attract women effortlessly, so play to your strengths no matter what they are; there is a groupie for every male endeavor. Except World of Warcraft.

XIII. Err on the side of too much boldness, rather than too little

Touching a woman inappropriately on the first date will get you further with her than not touching her at all. Don’t let a woman’s faux indignation at your boldness sway you; they secretly love it when a man aggressively pursues what he wants and makes his sexual intentions known. You don’t have to be an asshole, but if you have no choice, being an inconsiderate asshole beats being a polite beta, every time.

XIV. Fuck her good

Fuck her like it’s your last fuck. And hers. Fuck her so good, so hard, so wantonly, so profligately that she is left a quivering, sparking mass of shaking flesh and sex fluids. Drain her of everything, then drain her some more. Kiss her all over, make love to her all night, and hold her close in the morning. Own her body, own her gratitude, own her love. If you don’t know how, learn to give her squirting orgasms.

XV. Maintain your state control

You are an oak tree. You will not be manipulated by crying, yelling, lying, head games, sexual withdrawal, jealousy ploys, pity plays, shit tests, hot/cold/hot/cold, disappearing acts, or guilt trips. She will rain and thunder all around you and you will shelter her until her storm passes. She will not drag you into her chaos or uproot you. When you have mastery over yourself, you will have mastery over her.

XVI. Never be afraid to lose her

You must not fear. Fear is the love-killer. Fear is the ego-triumph that brings abject loneliness. You will face your fear. You will permit it to pass over and through you. And when your ego-fear is gone you will turn and face your lover, and only your heart will remain. You will walk away from her when she has violated your integrity, and you will let her walk when her heart is closed to you. She who can destroy you, controls you. Don’t give her that power over yourself. Love yourself before you love her.

***

The closer you follow the letter of these commandments, the easier you will find and keep real, true unconditional love and happiness in your life.

Best,

Roissy, Your Lord and King
 
My girl wont let me eat the pussy????

Ok, I know I'm not the first asking this but i need some BGOL PHDs/ psychologist...

Ive been with my chick for 2yrs now and I recently put a ring on it, but one thing has been bugging me for a long ass time now.
Baby girl wont let me down there:confused:

I remember the first attempt years ago, she was like uhhh what are u about to do...
I tried a few other times and she finally got upset because i wouldnt let it go! she says "im not into that" I dont get that shit.

Now i know the question is WHY beg to eat the pussy???

In my opinion I finally found the chick for me so i want to give her the premium service! Ive made many women lose they minds on that ish + a nice pussy massacre, its only fair my main squeeze gets it too!!!:cool:
Plus HELL sometimes I just be tired and dont wanna be on that ass for 45mins.:lol:

As a man, I just dont get this ish.
here are my theories

1. Shes waiting for I DOs (but i already put a ring on it)
2. She scared she may go crazy on me
3. she doesnt want me to go down and have to compare me to an ex "on the pussy eating skills"

Any Veteran Advice?????????????????????????????

Another Job

http://www.bgol.us/board/showthread.php?p=10033848#post10033848
 
http://www.bgol.us/board/newreply.php?do=newreply&p=10040447

Why do so many mysgonistic males come from single parent households?

If it's just the mother there you would think that the mother would have taught him to be the most polite male ever. Nothing but respectful to women. She can teach him whatever without the influence of the father.

I'd expect a mysogonistic male to come from a single father house hold or maybe a two parent home.

But nobody has ever discussed this and i think it's time.

I come from a two parent household but I have a couple of partners who came from single parent households who ran through women and this is a collective summary of what they shared with me told and an analysis of why they treat women they way they do.

IMO.....


Their moms' romanced on them. Romanced as in their mothers raised them up to be the kind of man she would want to be with at that moment- after her years of being ran through by "players/ballers/thugs" (men she couldn't control)- instead of raising him to be a man that could handle women. Examples of this would be her telling him to "always be nice to women, get them flowers, treat them with respect, under no circumstances hit a woman, always treat women like a lady" and the like and she instills these qualities- qualities SHE ADMIRES NOW AFTER THE FACT- into her son without giving him any counterpoints leaving him ill prepared to deal with women general. So as he comes of age he goes out there with this lopsided view of women (they are sugar and spice and everything nice) and gets his heart stomped on a few times and realizes- subconsciously at first- that his mother did not tell him the truth about women but told him misguided information to cater to her own vanities and romances and left him ill prepared. She lied to him. In addition, as he gets older he starts to question the relationship his mother and father and starts to see it in a whole different light ("If she has lied to me about women in general, has she lied to me about her and her relationship with my dad?"); this is expedited if he has any relationship with his father and he is able to tell his side of the story. The pendulum swings the other way to counterbalance what mom's did...and now bitches ain't shit.:hmm:


In my opinion of course.:hmm:

*two cents*


i think pogo hit the nail on the head.

most cats growing up with mom are raised to be too soft with women therefore they get heartbroken the hardest and turn into the biggest playas...

a cat that has had some male influence (doesnt have to be a dad) on the subject of women and relationships has a more well rounded perspective on shit. he isnt expecting women to be perfect.

when he gets played or lied to, he understands a lil better, was prepared a lil better. he has someone in his corner that understands the shit. he recovers as a smarter man without all the spite and misdirected anger that the other cat may have. so he goes on about his life where the other cat is hell bent on "getting bitches back" or "playing these hoes instead of letting them play him".

just a theory. there are prolly a million reasons why people do what they do.

*two cents*
 



one of the comments about the video

What's with this challenge stuff anyway? It's commonly understood that a person who is a "challenge" is a person who's difficult. Only a masochist wants to deal with difficult people. Why not be easy-going? Why isn't that considered a best option? Life itself is a challenge enough. Why do Western women--particularly American & Canadian women--seem to think being difficult is a good way to be? Good men want a good woman, not a sparring partner.
 
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Dont know if anyone posted but a bitch always has a spare!! She might not ever kissed him,it might be a 10 year gap ,but she always can pickup quickly.
 
Why Black Women Can't Find Good Black Men
By Mybrotha.COM Staff Writer


It still amazes some men to hear Black women say that they can't find good, quality Black men for companionship. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the ratio of women to men in the U.S. is about 145 million women to roughly 139 million men. In more manageable terms -- for every 100 sistas, there are about 87 brothas.
Not too bad.

But according to Black women, the best of Black men are either hidden deeply within those 87, or have somehow disappeared within that missing 13. If these men are not physically hidden or totally out of the relationship picture -- where are they?

The answer: They're right here. They're over there. They're everywhere!

These sentiments are spoken loudly by the thousands of available Black men who find it illogical to simply state "No good men exist." Many Black men don't understand the social reasoning behind the female belief that there is a Black male shortage. To men, it appears that women have become so enthralled with the notion of there being a shortage -- many don't take the time to notice the Black men who are available. It is here that we begin to explore the depths of the problem.

Women aren't looking for just any guy. They seek men of quality, good character, and substance -- which has nothing to do with numbers. Since guys are supposed to be more logical creatures, we tend to crunch numbers. We also tend to take a more tangible position by believing that if they can hear us, touch us, and see us -- how can they say there aren't enough of us?

But ask any woman -- she will likely tell you that plenty of brothas exist, but not many with whom she would want to spend quality time.

Also, there is an argument from Black women who believe that there are specific reasons for the shortages. For instance, the numbers of Black men residing in prisons, and the many Black men who choose to date women of other races.

Going back to our 100-Women to 87-Men ratio, the following stats my shed some light on where Black women say the available Black men are hiding:

White Women
Chances are, Black men who desire White females today, desired them yesterday and will probably desire them for the foreseeable future. We cannot assume that a Black man dates Black women his entire life; has a bad experience; and as a result, decides to explore life with a White female.
We're not hating on White women, but how much of the 87 should we subtract? Let's choose a medium-sized number like 20 to denote the total unavailable to Black women.

Prison
Unfortunately, there are a lot of Black men serving time in local, state and federal prisons. But women must ask themselves, "Why would I want a man who commits crimes serious enough to land him behind bars?"
Don't get me wrong. We still love our imprisoned brothas, and some of them have been incarcerated unjustly.

But this issue is relative and depends on each woman's definition of, "good brotha". If women desire men of integrity and great moral fiber, then we should subtract another medium-sized number (20) from the group of 87. This accounts for the sad numbers of brothas who just aren't living right and don't deserve a spot in society.

Homosexuality
Men who are homosexual, bisexual, or live outside of what society calls, "heterosexual" -- make up another medium-sized number since they don't typically seek relationships with women. Strangely enough, there are some bisexual men who also desire to be in heterosexual relationships. However, most heterosexual women don't knowingly choose to date a bisexual man.
So again, we subtract (20) from the group of 87 to account for gay men, and other men who aren't considered "straight".

Now we have the Big Three. According to Black women and many within the Black community, these three situations create a wedge that has been driven between Black women and available "good" Black men.
But what does it all mean?

It means that in reality, only 87 - 60 = 27 available Black men are actually, "available" for the 100 Black women in our Census stats. This is, of course, assuming there are 100 available, good Black women out there.

If we assume there are, then the ratio reveals some pretty low numbers.

Now, the task for our sistas is to locate one of the 27 men who is considered, "good".

http://www.mybrotha.com/nogoodmen.asp
 
Some men have had it so easy in the past that they frown upon and look down on a challenge. Some are just use to rolling up in their BMW, with their gym body,white teeth, linen suit,with a 10 inch dick and award winning dick game and bagging females in a reasonable amount of time. Truth be told, not all women care about how much money a man has, the kind of car he drive or the size of his dick. But you can't knock those brothers for taking care of their body and being financially stable because that provides them with options.

So ladies you can't expect a man to wait.I have always said that it is best for a female to not say anything. Ladies when you say "I am not having sex until I am married or find the right man" is a slap in the face for that a good man because now he has to do everything while never receiving any privileges. Real recognize real. If you are living righteous any man will be able to pick up on that vibe. Without ever saying a word he will understand that you are serious and looking for a self-respecting man.Telling him up front before you even get to know each other will more then likely cause a man to explore his other options.

Relationships are like a credit score. A person with good credit will more then likely make better decisions than someone with poor credit. Same goes for relationships. A woman needs to look at her relationship credit. Is it good or does she have a list of negative trade lines(many sex partners/bad relationships). When your application is denied (men willing to wait) please understand why.Every man would love to wait but if your relationship credit is so bad...are you worth waiting for?
:yes::yes::yes::yes:
 
1. Realize life is not a game
2. Choose a wife, who "LIKES" to fuck...(be warned about "high maintenance" and "rather be cute" chicks)
3. Choose a wife, who you like to fuck...
4. Realize, all females are not women. Most females are chasing money and would "rather be sitting down on their ass until drinks and music are available". Good women will go harder than your dudes when they love you and you love them!!
5. YOU GROW THE FUCK UP!!

:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::yes::yes::yes::yes:
 
1)say what you mean & mean what you say - always be honest and truthful in your dealings with women. If you got other women in your life, let it be known up front. Don't say anything that you can't deliver. Not every woman will go for it, but the one's that do will respect you.

2)never treat a woman's pussy like it's the be all, end all - women want sex just as much as men, they just play the game better than men do. When men stop acting so thirsty, the game will change to our favor.

3) when you find the one, make sure she's THE ONE - the question both of you have to answer to each other is; what do you bring to the table? You should have been involved with this woman long enough to answer those questions without asking her directly. Pay attention to her behavior and actions, not what she says. If her negatives are things you could live with, without getting angry and resentful, then you have a good shot with her.

4) make sure communication is good - you should be able to communicate about almost anything. If you can't, run for the hills.

5) make sure you're friends - if she was a dude, could you hang with her? Would you want to? Once the rose-colored glasses come off, this becomes a real question.

6) make sure she likes sex and wants to please you - many women treat sex as a means to an end (if I get what I want or if he acts right, then I'll give him some). If she is like that, then kick her to the curb. Make sure she brings her "A" game, like she's trying to put you to sleep (same for you). If she's lacking in that department, she's likely to continue to be that way.

Remember; the one that shows how much they care the least, usually has the most power in the relationship.


^^^^^^^
 
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