From the website delusionaldamage.com
All Women Are Like That
Posted on April 22, 2011 by Delusion Damage
I once had the questionable privilege of observing the female instinctual response to male violence up close.
As a member of a group of three friends brought together by our involvement in martial arts, I was attending a martial arts competition where one of our number was competing. His girlfriend had also come along. The friend in question was worried for the honor of his martial arts club – they had never lost a competition yet – and determined to uphold it.
When the time came for his fight, his girlfriend, my other friend and I watched from the sidelines as he faced off against a less experienced martial artist from another club. The fight quickly turned one-sided – my friend took all the fight out of his opponent within the first half of the match, proceeded to use him as a punching bag until he started to have trouble standing up, and spent the rest of the match throwing him around the ring every time he managed to climb up off the floor.
I don’t remember if the guy had a concussion or what it was, in any case he lay on the floor for a long time after the match was over and the paramedics seemed to take something of an interest in him. He had a look on his face like he’d been run over by an eighteen-wheeler and his shirt was ripped from the collar halfway down the front in a way that really completed his violence-victim poster-boy look. I felt really sorry for the poor guy.
My friend’s girlfriend felt nothing but lust. The moment my friend stepped out of the ring, she was all over him, pawing him and rubbing herself on him like an animal in heat. I could practically see the raw desire radiating from her as she desperately struggled to restrain herself from jumping his sweat-drenched bones right there in front of me and my other friend and the poor guy holding his head on the floor and the entire collection of martial arts practitioners and audience members in attendance. Just for the sake of science, I tried talking to her, and her incoherent responses confirmed that her higher brain had indeed gone completely offline. This girl was normally quite restrained in her public displays of affection, and witnessing the transformation you would hardly have believed she hadn’t suddenly been possessed by some sort of demonic succubus or taken a liberal helping of a controlled substance. Never once in the years I’ve known the two of them have I ever seen her so consumed by lust as right after witnessing her boyfriend beat another guy into a heart-wrenchingly sorry state.
Whenever you have doubts about the amoral nature of women’s instincts, and whenever you hear that old bullshit about women being the more empathetic sex, remember this lesson, and if it’s not too much of an inconvenience, slap whoever is spouting that drivel in the face.
The female libido responds to one thing and one thing only: power. In whatever form it takes – violence, money, social status, dominant behavior, aloof indifference, etc. – power is the only thing that opens a woman’s floodgates. Game is based on manufacturing signals of power, which is why it works so well.
Battered women love their abusive boyfriends and go back to them time and time again because they can’t help themselves from being irresistibly drawn to the displays of power that their abuse-hotline-poster faces remind them of every time they look in the mirror.
Power is more important to women than anything, because it is fundamentally necessary for survival and women do not innately have any themselves. The fact that women have a natural deficit of survival ability which they must trade themselves more of from men using their natural excess reproductive ability is something I’ve discussed before. The prime directive of the female brain is to gain acceptance and approval. Nothing can stand in the way of that, certainly not luxuries like ethics, morals, personal integrity or personal principles.
If there was a fight between two cave men, any woman who invested her energies in comforting the guy with his brains slowly leaking onto a rock would not have passed on her genes to the next generation. Only the kind of woman who could coldly ignore the human tragedy in front of her and focus her energies on sidling up to and pleasing the killer could become an ancestor of today’s human population.
Remembering this will help if you ever feel overcome with the urge to put women on a pedestal and view them as kind and pure creatures of sugar, spice and everything nice.
You’ll hear feminists claim that men have historically been known to make their way in the world with violence, but you will hear none consider that maybe they wouldn’t have if women hadn’t always rewarded them with passionate sex, unwavering love, an eagerness to please and all manner of affection for it.
This is, however, what female survival and reproduction instincts are geared for: to latch onto the most powerful man they can and make him as happy as possible. There’s nothing in there about choosing men who don’t kill people for fun, beat their women, watch American Idol or cash their paychecks from taxpayer bailout coffers. Nothing at all.
All the now politically incorrect origin stories that say something to the effect of “woman was created to serve man” are, like much of the old wisdom that’s now considered silly superstition, based on a fundamental truth about human nature: every woman has in her head those very same emotions that tell her to do whatever she can to please the man in power, no matter what else must be compromised. Yes, all women are like that.
A woman’s survival and reproduction instincts imbue her with a special quality particular to her gender: the ever-present feeling that she is not good enough. Manifesting in myriad forms as insecurity, fear of disapproval, low self-esteem, feelings of inadequacy, herd mentality, etc., this fundamental aspect of female psychology is connected to and detectable in just about everything a woman does in her life. The “strong and independent” feminists are the most inadequate-feeling of them all – their desire to imitate and become more like men has its roots not so much in Freud’s “penis envy” as in an understandable “confidence envy”. They see men feeling rather okay about themselves, compare this to their own persistent feelings of inadequacy, and conclude that female roles and professions much be unjustly disrespected, that societal pressures on women must be more severe, that men must simply be giving women a much harder time than women are giving men – but the fact is that women are just born with a natural penchant for feeling bad about themselves, and no amount of taxpayer-funded empowerment programs will ever change that.
Women need to constantly feel a little bit inadequate in order to make the utmost effort to more effectively please their men. Is that misogynistic? Well, I didn’t make it that way, you can direct your complaints of sexism to your deity of choice. That’s just the way women are, and none of us got a vote on whether we want them to be that way or not.
You may have noticed that women don’t really have much of a “fight or flight” response. They have a freeze-and-scream or flight response, but that’s not the same thing. What they do when faced with a situation that for a man would be a “fight” type of situation is surrender, beg, plead, placate, bargain, cry, and try to win mercy and good favor by offering anything and everything they can think of to their would-be enemy.
The female mind works from a starting assumption of “I have no power, I cannot fight, I must always win the approval of the powers that be through pleasing them.” No matter how far feminists try to run from their own natures and how much power they manage to gain for themselves, their minds will still always work like this and no amount of achievements will make that feeling of helplessness go away.
This brings us to shame. Shame is a characteristically feminine emotion. Men don’t spend very much of their time feeling ashamed – not even the boot-licking betas who have good reason to. If you’re a connoisseur of female language and the expressions women use, you’ll know that their insults often carry an element of trying to arouse feelings of shame and inadequacy in their target. Consider the simple and common phrase “you should feel ashamed of yourself”. How often do you hear a man say that to another man? It just doesn’t carry much weight with men. It’s a lot like “you’re going to die alone” in that regard. These are insults that only really have their best effect on women and, in the case of shame, children – even male children, being in the same helpless position as women, have some of the same instinctual behaviors but lose them as they turn into men.
What shame does for a woman is make her conform to the expectations of the powers that she depends on for her survival – the herd, her provider mate, other groups or people. Men have much less of a need for this.
When reprimanded for undesirable behavior, men and women react differently. Men become angry – “who the fuck does he think he is to tell me what to do? Fuck him!”. The male mind reacts by preparing to fight for dominance. Women become ashamed – “I’m so useless. I can’t even do this right. I’ll try harder to do better…”. The female mind reacts by preparing to please her provider. The insults women use are geared to exploit this property – despite all their claims to the contrary, few of them actually know anything about how men think, and they largely project their own vulnerabilities onto men as well.
A lot of the herd mentality discussed here before and a lot of women’s often illogical behavior has its basis in this fundamental need to please. For a man, the ability to make good decisions is critical – in competing with other males for status in the tribe, tactics, strategies and finding the best way to do things make all the difference. For a woman, the priorities are different. Doing what more powerful others want her to do, even if it’s not the objectively best way or even close, is what will allow her to survive and reproduce. For a woman, making strategic decisions based on the objective properties of the environment could often be a negative thing if it causes her to go against the wishes of those her entire existence is predicated on pleasing. If it seems to you that women simply download their thoughts from their environment rather than think for themselves… you may in fact have seen just that happen.
The Game concept of “social proof” has a lot to do with this. Anything popular must, by herd-pleasing logic, be good, and whatever other women think must, by herd-pleasing logic, be exactly what one should think, so is it not obvious that a man who is popular with other women who think he’s great simply must be attractive? According to field tests, women can be relied upon to feel so.
Social proof works in other ways as well. You can notice a tendency among women to this effect: if lots of people start listening to them, they start to believe they have something important to say (see: Oprah). Men are more likely to believe, or not believe, that they have something important to say regardless of who listens (see: yours truly). According to my visitor statistics, today is going to be another one of those days that will break all the traffic records for this site – this happens every now and then as the popularity of the site keeps growing. Does the fact that my articles will be viewed thousands of times today make me feel smarter or wiser than I did when I wrote the first articles on the site and not a single soul except myself had ever laid eyes on them? Not really. I like that people are finding the site worth coming back to and telling others about, but my faith in myself and the service I provide does not depend on public opinion.
The same applies in the inverse situation – if for instance this site wasn’t growing in popularity at all but instead simply languished forgotten and unobserved in a dark corner of the internet where nobody ever goes, that would not make me feel like what I’m saying has no value. A woman is more likely to think “if nobody cares, then it must not be important”, whereas a man is more likely to think “if nobody cares, then they must all be stupid”. The reliability of public opinion as an indicator of worth is higher to a female mind than to a male mind, and this bias persists, undetected, no matter how impartial we try to be. The only reasonable thing to do is to acknowledge its existence and try to control for its effects (bonus quest: consider the implications of this for democratic elections).
There are some ways for a woman to relieve the pressure of self-abasing feelings. Probably the dumbest and most popular is to blame the failures that are perceived to be causing the feelings on someone else. After all, if it’s somebody else’s fault, then it can’t be my fault, and I can cover up the feelings of shame and guilt and inadequacy with feelings of anger and self-pity! Feminism is largely based on this genius idea.
The victim mentality has a special allure to a woman that men often struggle to understand. Men don’t have such a need to blame others for our failures because we aren’t as likely to be sent into spirals of self-deprecation when we run into obstacles in life. This isn’t through any merits of our own as much as it is because our brains just aren’t built that way, but it is what it is. The reality on the street is that the victim role is mostly played by women, and the reason for this is that it caters to a need that they have to offload some of those feelings of inadequacy that their female minds keep endlessly producing. It’s a fucked-up and destructive way, but all too few women know better. Playing the victim, they reinforce their perception of themselves as helpless, and they reinforce the hard-wired state of insecurity, approval-seeking and related fears that their gender naturally tends toward.
The predominant emotion in most women’s lives – and quite a few men’s too – is fear. Fear comes in many exciting flavors: anger, anxiety, self-doubt, hate, insecurity, etc., are all fear-based emotions. They come from fear of pain, fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of a person or group of people, fear of disapproval, etc., and it’s even been said that all fears can be reduced to the fundamental fear of death. Be that as it may, a life lived in fear is going to consist of days filled with an abundance of fear-based feelings, decisions and actions.
If you want a Game tip worth more than half the books written on Game, here you go: always assume that a woman is scared. Anything she does is probably at least partially based in fear. Some women are going to read this and think “but I’m not scared all the time”, and that doesn’t make this piece of advice any less useful. Compared to the average default male level of confidence, the average female level of (lack of) confidence can fairly accurately be described as “being scared”. The basis of confidence- and courage- related expressions like “being a man”, “pussying out”, etc., is the easily observable fact that when you add some extra fear to a man’s default state his behavior starts resembling that of a woman. Saying you’re “not scared all the time” just means you are not more scared than normal – we could also say that there is always some amount of fear present in every person at all times, and that this amount tends to be greater for women than for men (and it’s not because of “rape culture”, it’s just that women are naturally like that due to their instinctual imperative to seek approval).
And the bitchiest women – they’re the most scared of all. They’ve gone past the shy-scared stage straight to the belligerent-scared stage where they try to scare you first so you won’t notice how vulnerable they really are. Attack is the best defense, and it’s often a fear response. Incidentally, not understanding this is a major reason why people get shot and stabbed – a scared criminal will kill you twice as fast as an angry criminal.
When in doubt, assume that a woman is feeling somewhat afraid. Assume that any strange behavior she exhibits is motivated by fear. Assume that what she wants most of all is approval, acceptance and to feel less afraid.
Assume that all women are like that.
Do this, and you will go far.
*two cents*