"Mom" is dying, and I don't know how to feel.

[Non-StopJFK2TAB]

I did this with my dad. He was never going to be man enough to face me. So I laid it out for about three hours. Covid was picking up stream and he asked can we make the most of this time we have left. I said yes, that’s why I asked to talk to you. Not going to rehash all I said but by the time I finished that mf left with his head hanging down. I didn’t even curse him.

some truth can be more vulgar than all the curse words uttered.

 

[playahaitian]

The trauma is real. Now, a lot of guys who had horrible relationships with their mothers go out and Abuse women or do some crazy shit like that. Some even avoid relationships or treat women like shit because of that initial relationship with their mother. Some even Date outside their race for this reason


I'm not that by a long shot. I recognize the deficiencies of my mother and her inability to love me the way I needed and hope to find the love I require from a Black woman (again)

Most of your fist paragraph are done by other subconsciously. They don’t know they’re doing it or the reasons that they’re doing it usually until they’re told. Or they go to therapy and find out why they’re the eBay that they are.

this real strong honest analysis and self reflection

 

[d_the_inc]

I can't offer much more than what's been said. I lost my mom, and confidant 2yrs ago. Our relationship was complex, however, it became full circle in the last 10 years. She was a phenomenal grandmother, and a brilliant woman, who, if she could let go of her troubled past, I believe would still be here today. I had to work really hard to accept the fact that she was a teen when she had me...and was surrounded by the crooked straights of Harlem.

All this to say...she was my imperfect mother, and I am eternally grateful for her...she taught me what unconditional love meant...and as a father of three young men...I pass that onto them .

Keep your head up bro...and it's okay to express those emotions. We lift and pull each other along.

 

[REDLINE]

I can't offer much more than what's been said. I lost my mom, and confidant 2yrs ago. Our relationship was complex, however, it became full circle in the last 10 years. She was a phenomenal grandmother, and a brilliant woman, who, if she could let go of her troubled past, I believe would still be here today. I had to work really hard to accept the fact that she was a teen when she had me...and was surrounded by the crooked straights of Harlem.

All this to say...she was my imperfect mother, and I am eternally grateful for her...she taught me what unconditional love meant...and as a father of three young men...I pass that onto them .

Keep your head up bro...and it's okay to express those emotions. We lift and pull each other along.

Don’t discount yourself, you can offer a lot.

All experiences count and could help others.

 

[d_the_inc]

Don’t discount yourself, you can offer a lot.

All experiences count and could help others.

indeed

 

[godofwine]

Man, this is why a implore brothers to make every attempt to reconcile their broken relationships. Most of the time it begins with you just saying f it, I forgive you, let's start from now.

It's kind of difficult when you have family members who are just off the meat rack

I had an argument with my brother that stemmed from a fantasy football beef but actually was bourne much earlier than that

Last September we went back and forth texting and I called him a 42 year old loser to who lives with his mother. He said some shit to me that didn't bother me, but I kinda went in.

Last month he wrote a 28-page letter that he sent to me in the mail and on the first page he said, I don't know what our mother did to be cursed with such a vile loathsome and ungrateful piece of shit like you for a son"

And that's just on the front page

I'm sorry, I'm not reading a 28 Page Letter of "you ain't shit" by a 43 year old little brother who never moved out of his mother's house

I straight Colin Powell'd that shit

Would you read that shit?

On one end maybe I should try to repair that relationship, but on the other end, he Harbors so much resentment toward me that I can't make that motherfuker love me, and I don't need him, so...chalk it up as a loss.

I'm grown. He's grown. I'm doing me and he's doing him

End of the day, I stopped fucking with my immediate family long before they stop fucking with me. I stopped going over there for the holidays and the only time I saw them was at the Super Bowl party every year that rotates between my house and my mother's tiny apartment

 

[mailboxpimp]

Man, this is why a implore brothers to make every attempt to reconcile their broken relationships. Most of the time it begins with you just saying f it, I forgive you, let's start from now.

my relationship with my moms & my life with my moms was the most amazing! I didnt have no broken nothing! my moms sent me to private school (elementary & high school) One spot was a boarding academy! my play clothes was the type of gear my friends with both parents wore to school. We went on trips across country & out of the country...

I thought going to macys to buy crab meat was normal! my suits werre always taylored!
breakfast was made almost every morning, dinner was ALWAYS warm in the oven when I got home from school.

the list goes on!