Experiencing A BIPOLAR Women

[Naha-Nago]

Damn man......God...damn.... Your screen name fits...


*two cents*

 

[Osca Lee]

The chick went all night, only would do it if you could manage to bang her all night, very romantic, 5 star hotels, shopping sprees on her and was a stone cold freak it was pure fantasy, movie star gorgeous!.....but, she's crazy and i'm running!

Not Bi-polar, yet a narcissist.

Common Behaviours of a Narcissist
‘Me versus You’ mentality;
Competitiveness;
‘Tit for tat’ retaliations;
Striving for the ‘spotlight’ and attention;
Excessive generosity to outside people;
Uncomfortable when others are incurring attention or praise;
If can’t be centre of attention will either discredit or leave the experience;
May fake illnesses or problems to procure attention / sympathy;
Abusive verbal behaviour when angered or insecure;
Tendency toward violent and even criminal behaviour;
Inappropriate and inapplicable language in front of women and children;
Dark moods that affect others;
False promises;
Glorifies and falsifies achievements past and present;
Expects to be recognised and praised;
Finds others not complying with wants intolerable;
Extreme sensitivity to criticism;
Extreme defensiveness when confronted;
Pathological lying;
Disdain for rules, regulations, decency and morality;
Childish outbursts and behaviour;
Very little consideration for how behaviour affects others;
Extreme lack of compassion or sensitivity towards love partners (and others') problems;
Grossly unsupportive to familiars in times of need;
Brushes incidences under the carpet;
Uses allies real or imagined to back up claims and arguments;
Uses guilt and manipulation to influence love partners;
Doesn’t trust love partners;
Tendency towards unreasonable jealousy and possessiveness;
Capable of sexually degrading name calling;
Can steal, harm or hide property to sabotage love partners;
Uses vengeance, threats and intimidation to control ;
Uses excessive charm and manipulation to control;
Little (if any) sense of conscience;
Discredits love partners to gain attention / sympathy from others;
Will ‘attack’ when confronted or questioned;
Emotionally punishes love partners when feeling insecure;
Emotionally punishes love partners when they are struggling with issues, losses, grief or challenges;
Employs unpredictable and unaccountable behaviour;
Capable of ‘disgusting’ behaviour to gain the upper hand and control a situation;
Feels powerful and fulfilled when creating powerlessness in another;
Gross failure to apologise or have sympathy after creating tears, distress or trauma to the love partner.

Common Expressions of a Narcissist
“I had them eating out of my hands.”
(Believes in manipulating others to create results).


“You didn’t let me finish what I was saying.”
(After verbally maiming and then pretending there was more to say)


“Just because I didn’t do what you wanted when you wanted it.”
(A justification for receptively breaking promises)


“Just because I didn’t say what you wanted to hear.”
(A justification for verbal abuse)


“You’re the only person who misunderstands what I say. You’re totally over-emotional.”
(Same as above)


“I’m sorry, what more do you want from me.”
(Followed by justifications for the behaviour with body language that is clearly not aligned with an apology)


“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry.”
(Followed by repetitive unacceptable behaviour)


“Why can’t you just get over the past?”
(Followed by repetitive unacceptable behaviour)


“What about your issues?”
(When failing to take responsibility for unacceptable behaviour)


“You make me behave like this.”
(Same applies for above)


“You’re the only person in the world I have these problems with.”
(Same applies for above)


“You act like my mother,” or, “You’re a control freak.”
(When asked for the truth or trustworthy / accountable behaviour)


Gaslighting Techniques used by the Narcissist
Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse that is used by narcissists that is deeply insidious and difficult to pinpoint. It works by instilling confusion. If you are being gaslighted you'll lose trust in your senses, identity and common environment.

The narcissist will tell you:

What you are feeling and thinking;
An interaction that you believed was decent with another person actually had agendas connected to it;
Your body language appears suggestive to other people;
A friend or family member has made certain references about you;
You were seen in a certain place acting inappropriately;
You said or did something (you weren’t aware of) when tired, distracted, unaware, intoxicated or asleep;
Certain information was discovered about you;
Certain people (you thought were loyal) are now agreeing about your faults;
The incident (created by the narcissist) was your fault, or merely a perception based on your paranoia or unstable emotions;
An excuse for the incidence based on a ‘story’ that extracts guilt from you, whereby you feel awful for making the ‘judgement’ you did;
Other people perceive you as bossy, controlling, manipulative, uncaring, incapable etc. (defective in some way).


Narcissists refuse to remain ‘Topical’

A narcissist will dodge accountability in a discussion in a variety of ways

Telling you repetitively to lower your voice;
Interrupting you with unrelated conversation;
Telling you to let them finish what they are saying whilst continuing to be psychologically and verbally abusive;
Making references to allies and unrelated people;
Telling you the matter is resolved without validating the conversation in a way that allows you to feel resolved;
Asking if you are happy to get that off your chest and then changing the topic;
Throwing in an abusive unrelated comment to anger or upset you;
Refusing to discuss the issue with you;
Bringing up an issue they are unhappy about, and treating that as the focus of conversation.


The Narcissistic Partner’s Addiction
Sadly, because narcissists inflict such severe psychological abuse upon love partners, a perverse addiction often occurs. The ‘victim’ has idolised the narcissist by seeing them as ‘the ideal partner’ (the illusion created via charm that the narcissist originally used to hook the partner) and continuously tries to win the approval, love and trust of the narcissist. There are many other reasons why this addiction occurs which are outlined in the article Narcissism Understood, my book Breaking the Chains of Painful Love and my eBook ‘How to Recognise and Heal Narcissistic Abuse’.

To the outside world it may seem that the love partner is deranged and is the problem (the narcissist has expertly created this illusion). The narcissist will often appear strong and stable to extended family, acquaintances, counsellors and even authorities. Tragically in many cases the love partner will believe that they are in fact damaged, incapable, no good and defective. They often think they are at fault. Such feelings are the result of a severely diminished sense of identity and a battered self-esteem. Many narcissistic love partners suffer profound depression and even severe physical deterioration. Frighteningly, many victims of narcissism don’t recover their sense of self, even years after the relationship has expired.

Narcissism addiction and devastation is a common occurrence and can happen to any individual from any demographic. Generally this condition occurs to women, and this is regardless of their level of intelligence and self-sufficiency. The disease of narcissistic addiction is an emotionally based issue, it has little to do with practical and mental capabilities or physical attributes.



This article is an excerpt from the books,
Breaking The Chains of Painful Love and Take Back Your Power.

damn.....that is all I can say

 

[BestCreW35]

damn.....that is all I can say

Exactly!

 

[THEONE7]

 

[4North1Side2]

Yeah. The even crazier part is when you talk about looks, its not just "fat ass" "big legs" or the ho types we look at here. My ex was a "wifey" looking type in regards to she was just "pretty". Nothing over the top. Nice ass, but again relatively ordinary. Thus the hook. She was a beast in the bedroom initially, but that was just the lure.She was quiet in public, had a great smile, and had mastered the art of "listening". I stress that because when I talked she would smile and nod her head not having a fucking clue as to what I was talking about. She was a chameleon. She even said once that her being nice to me during the divorce process would cause me to hate her one day. That's not true because I can't give her that much energy, but she sure is making life tough.

I wish you and your children the best.

 

[bborn]

peace

Dam, this sounds too much like girl.
Mines was gorgeous and looked like a movie star, everything was perfect she was Italian and Black..the thing of it is is, she was chasing ME and i gave her the complete challenge she loved until she switched personalities. She's a wrap now though.

Both of them sound very familiar but I definitely wasnt trying to marry homegirl after she showed her colors a few times like calling herself ready to jump up out of my whip while it was moving during an argument;
Somebody else married chick & I wish him the best of his sanity.
Im good with the brand of chicks as I've had my share;
will skim through this entire post one of these days to recognize some more familiar qualities but Im good for now.

peace

 

[King of Pain]

I wish you and your children the best.

Thank you.

 

[Pootypoot]

think long term. Do you really want a woman like that to be the mother of your children?

Too late for me my dude. I'm a stupid lazy ass nigga when it comes to relationships.

 

[nattydreadz]

@BestCreW35 definitely sounds like a capricorn! Heed the advice of @kwazdog & @eewwll...they were spot on about many things.

Don't get caught up in the physical in exchange for lifelong headache. I believe people can change, but that change has to come from within themselves - they have to WANT to change.

I think most of us have dated a woman like this before.
Think - why is a dime piece like that single and available at 31? The homies done ran through her and recognized that she isn't worth the headache...

As far as her prior marriage, she lied about that too...no need to pull the records to verify the lie. But sounds like you really like her. As hard as it is, best thing to do is cut her off...no more communication. Period.

 

[nubianbra]

RUN!!!!

She might by Halle Berry fine but she might be Halle Berry crazy too.

If your gut is telling you something is wrong. It probably is. Don't try to be Mr Fix it. You might find yourself on the end of a bunch of crazy mess.

 

[THEONE7]

RUN!!!!

She might by Halle Berry fine but she might be Halle Berry crazy too.

If your gut is telling you something is wrong. It probably is. Don't try to be Mr Fix it. You might find yourself on the end of a bunch of crazy mess.

I agree 100%...but I think it is very hard when there is an emotional connection. I think that is the part that makes it very difficult to just leave

 

[BestCreW35]

@BestCreW35 definitely sounds like a capricorn! Heed the advice of @kwazdog & @eewwll...they were spot on about many things.

Don't get caught up in the physical in exchange for lifelong headache. I believe people can change, but that change has to come from within themselves - they have to WANT to change.

I think most of us have dated a woman like this before.
Think - why is a dime piece like that single and available at 31? The homies done ran through her and recognized that she isn't worth the headache...

As far as her prior marriage, she lied about that too...no need to pull the records to verify the lie. But sounds like you really like her. As hard as it is, best thing to do is cut her off...no more communication. Period.

I agree 100%...but I think it is very hard when there is an emotional connection. I think that is the part that makes it very difficult to just leave

Yes i totally agree with you guys and i am officially done with that crazy bitch.

It was the emotional connection that kept me wanting her like you said THEONE7!

All of you brothas have been a tremendous help and i really thank you all for your advice and insight, let's keep this post going because the information is priceless! Only on BGOL

 

[BestCreW35]

Bump

 

[CPT Callamity]

@BestCreW35 definitely sounds like a capricorn! Heed the advice of @kwazdog & @eewwll...they were spot on about many things.

Don't get caught up in the physical in exchange for lifelong headache. I believe people can change, but that change has to come from within themselves - they have to WANT to change.

I think most of us have dated a woman like this before.
Think - why is a dime piece like that single and available at 31? The homies done ran through her and recognized that she isn't worth the headache...

Funny you mentioned a Capricorn. Chick I was dealing with a few years back was a Capricorn and kept reminding me she was bi-polar. Now I have very little experience with the condition but a lot of chicks say they are diagnosed with it. I think it's an excuse really. So old girl would be fine one minute and then drinking and acting a damn fool the next. One day she up and just started trying to diagnose me as having something when it was her projecting. She wasn't a bad looker, but her erratic behavior when it came to drinking made me exit stage left. Apparently, this bi-polarism was a result of her parents abandoning her and she had a failed marriage as a result which she constantly brought up.

If anything she just needed to put the bottle down and do some reflecting.

 

[KnownUnknown]

I know that on BGOL any sign of weakness/hurt/pain/mistake gets blasted on with the quickness, but reading this shit right here just got me reflecting real hard.

As brothers, we don't share any of this with each other, yet the struggles you're going through, 10 of your closest homies are too, and y'all would never know it.

Our community isn't weak because we feel. It's weak because we pretend we don't.

 

[Lucky7s]

Most women are not really "bipolar"...they have hormonal imbalances that need to be regulated with medication and/or PMDD. Easily controlled by taking birth control pills that allow them to bleed 4 times a year.

<h1 style="margin-top: 1em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; border-top-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-left-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-color: initial; outline-width: 0px; outline-style: initial; outline-color: initial; font-weight: bold; font-style: inherit; font-size: 1.3846em; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; line-height: 1.5; color: rgb(20, 55, 108); ">Premenstrual dysphoric disorder

PMDD; Severe PMS
Last reviewed: December 22, 2010.

Premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD) is a condition in which a woman has severe depression symptoms, irritability, and tension before menstruation. The symptoms of PMDD are more severe than those seen with premenstrual syndrome (PMS).
PMS refers to a wide range of physical or emotional symptoms that typically occur about 5 to 11 days before a woman starts her monthly menstrual cycle. The symptoms usually stop when or shortly after her period begins.
Causes, incidence, and risk factors

The causes of PMS and PMDD have not been found.
Hormone changes that occur during a woman's menstrual cycle appear to play a role.
PMDD affects between 3% and 8% of women during the years when they are having menstrual periods.
Many women with this condition have:

• Anxiety
• Major depression
• Seasonal affective disorder (SAD)

Other factors that may play a role include:

• Alcohol abuse
• Being overweight
• Drinking large amounts of caffeine
• Having a mother with a history of the disorder
• Lack of exercise

Symptoms

The symptoms of PMDD are similar to those of PMS. However, they are generally more severe and debilitating and include a least one mood-related symptom. Symptoms occur during the week just before menstrual bleeding and usually improve within a few days after the period starts.
Five or more of the following symptoms must be present to diagnose PMDD, including one mood-related symptom:

• Disinterest in daily activities and relationships
• Fatigue or low energy
• Feeling of sadness or hopelessness, possible suicidal thoughts
• Feelings of tension or anxiety
• Feeling out of control
• Food cravings or binge eating
• Mood swings marked by periods of teariness
• Panic attack
• Persistent irritability or anger that affects other people
• Physical symptoms, such as bloating, breast tenderness, headaches, and joint or muscle pain
• Problems sleeping
• Trouble concentrating

Signs and tests

No physical examination or lab tests can diagnose PMDD. A complete history, physical examination (including a pelvic exam), and psychiatric evaluation should be done to rule out other conditions.
Keeping a calendar or diary of symptoms can help women identify the most troublesome symptoms and the times when they are likely to occur. This information may help the health care provider diagnose PMDD and determine the best treatment.

Treatment

A healthy lifestyle is the first step to managing PMDD.

• Eat a balanced diet (with more whole grains, vegetables, fruit, and little or no salt, sugar, alcohol, and caffeine)
• Get regular aerobic exercise throughout the month to redue the severity of PMS symptoms
• Try changing your sleep habits before taking drugs for insomnia (See also: Sleeping difficulty)

Keep a diary or calendar to record:

• The type of symptoms you are having
• How severe they are
• How long they last

Antidepressants may be helpful.
The first option is usually an antidepressant known as a selective serotonin-reuptake inhibitor (SSRI). You can take SSRIs in the second part of your cycle up until your period starts, or for the whole month. Ask your doctor.
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) may be used either with or instead of antidepressants. During CBT, you have about 10 visits with a mental health professional over several weeks.
Other treatments that may help include:

• Birth control pills may decrease or increase PMS symptoms, including depression
• Diuretics may be useful for women who gain a lot of weight from fluid retention
• Nutritional supplements -- such as vitamin B6, calcium, and magnesium -- may be recommended
• Other medicines (such as Depo-Lupron) suppress the ovaries and ovulation
• Pain relievers such as aspirin or ibuprofen may be prescribed for headache, backache, menstrual cramping and breast tenderness

Expectations (prognosis)

After proper diagnosis and treatment, most women with PMDD find that their symptoms go away or drop to tolerable levels.

Complications

PMDD symptoms may be severe enough to interfere with a woman's daily life. Women with depression may have worse symptoms during the second half of their cycle and may need changes in their medication.
As many as 10% of women who report PMS symptoms, especially those with PMDD, have had suicidal thoughts. Suicide in women with depression is much more likely to occur during the second half of the menstrual cycle.
PMDD may be associated with eating disorders and smoking.

</h1>

 

[BestCreW35]

I know that on BGOL any sign of weakness/hurt/pain/mistake gets blasted on with the quickness, but reading this shit right here just got me reflecting real hard.

As brothers, we don't share any of this with each other, yet the struggles you're going through, 10 of your closest homies are too, and y'all would never know it.

Our community isn't weak because we feel. It's weak because we pretend we don't.

Exactly my brotha! That's why i said i would go ahead and ask people about this situation i was experiences with that chick!

 

[THEONE7]

Sad when you think about it, the whole mental disorder subject. Being in the situation myself and sincerely wanting to help the person shows me that it can be a huge headache and emotional roller coaster. Then even seeing the lack of control especially when it comes to sex and the need for intimacy with various people is alarming..

 

[djdee4420]

Damn!...I swear you're talkin about my woman!...I'm taking all Y'all advise

 

[DEBO0187]

Funny you mentioned a Capricorn. Chick I was dealing with a few years back was a Capricorn and kept reminding me she was bi-polar. Now I have very little experience with the condition but a lot of chicks say they are diagnosed with it. I think it's an excuse really. So old girl would be fine one minute and then drinking and acting a damn fool the next. One day she up and just started trying to diagnose me as having something when it was her projecting. She wasn't a bad looker, but her erratic behavior when it came to drinking made me exit stage left. Apparently, this bi-polarism was a result of her parents abandoning her and she had a failed marriage as a result which she constantly brought up.

If anything she just needed to put the bottle down and do some reflecting.

dam nigga.....this shit sounds soooo close to home..dam

 

[BestCreW35]

Damn!...I swear you're talkin about my woman!...I'm taking all Y'all advise

dam nigga.....this shit sounds soooo close to home..dam

It's no joke, and like i said this chick started talking to a 19 year old kid on Facebook and he told me she is "off".

Mind you she was 31. Glad it's done with!

 

[heiesuke]

I wouldn't say date… but fcuked and put up with. That shyt is depressing as all fuck but when I think about it, most females are like that. I kid.

 

[BestCreW35]

I wouldn't say date… but fcuked and put up with. That shyt is depressing as all fuck but when I think about it, most females are like that. I kid.

I had never experienced a female like this so maybe you need to date different kinds of women man.

Something was wrong with this chick, no doubt.

Very impulsive and telling me i was her future husband way too fast. While she was still married.

 

[heiesuke]

I had never experienced a female like this so maybe you need to date different kinds of women man.

Something was wrong with this chick, no doubt.

Very impulsive and telling me i was her future husband way too fast. While she was still married.

Can't say I was dating her, more like friends with benefits. But u know how it goes, they say that's what they want in the beginning, then turn around and want u to be hubby n shyt [or dam near].

 

[THEONE7]

Bump

 

[will_right]

Nah she's a Capricorn kwaz. She's ill, she's extreme about everything and her lies are just crazy man. She had a good relationship with her father but man its something going on with this female i really believe. I don't know if she's been molested or anything but she's turning weird. She's the prime example of "looks don't mean a thing" because this female is drop dead gorgeous but i can tell there's something missing!

Yeah something IS missing alright..her BRAIN..it's way too much to explain..but trust me it's a loosing situation..mayday mayday..i've been HIT i've been HIT. It's even WORSE when they don't seek HELP.my suggestion..BAIL dawg real talk

 

[will_right]

Women are just not emotionally fragile like that for no reason. I would be willing to bet anything, that if you could dig deep enough, you would find some critical issues from her youth that has psychologically fractured her emotional framework. Typically, it always stems from something that happenned in the home that caused a major disconnection from what most feminine spirits need to develop into sound individuals.

And you wont be able to fix it ...and more importantly she will probably resent you for trying to fix her. The emotional fragile are ironic like that.

And let me tell you, at 31, she is set firmly into a broken PATTERN that is going to take a whole lot to break homie....i dont know your situation, but you need to ask your question if it is worth it. No woman is pretty enough to be worth a fucking continuous headache.

You are dead on with it..and it hurts like hell to have someone like this in your life or to be in a relationship with KNOWING you can't help this person in a sense..it can be emotionally devastating IF one lets themselves go and falls in love with such a woman.Some women just aren't cut out to be in a long term relationship..in most cases these type of women are destined to be alone...for the most part..and NO cape can save them..they need medical attention they so desperately will not seek

 

[will_right]

Bruh look up Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I say that because you mentioned very selfish and irrational. I delt with something like that and it is very difficult because anything could go down when they are upset. Cut your loses or don't get too serious because if you turn this into a real relationship you will regret it in the end.

C/S 100% I just got out of a relationship with a sistah with the exact diagnosis..i hope he heeds your warnings if not he will surely crash and burn in the end..cuz there WILL be an END.

 

[BestCreW35]

C/S 100% I just got out of a relationship with a sistah with the exact diagnosis..i hope he heeds your warnings if not he will surely crash and burn in the end..cuz there WILL be an END.

Yeah i took these good brothers advice its all over. Thanks for your advice also. It gets worst it seems.......

 

[BestCreW35]

You are dead on with it..and it hurts like hell to have someone like this in your life or to be in a relationship with KNOWING you can't help this person in a sense..it can be emotionally devastating IF one lets themselves go and falls in love with such a woman.Some women just aren't cut out to be in a long term relationship..in most cases these type of women are destined to be alone...for the most part..and NO cape can save them..they need medical attention they so desperately will not seek

I totally agree this is very on point bro!

 

[ShortyCumStain]

Can't say I was dating her, more like friends with benefits. But u know how it goes, they say that's what they want in the beginning, then turn around and want u to be hubby n shyt [or dam near].

That's how it ALWAYS goes. It NEVER fails.

 

[Naha-Nago]

As fast as you can.

*two cents*

 

[will_right]

Not Bi-polar, yet a narcissist.

Common Behaviours of a Narcissist
‘Me versus You’ mentality;
Competitiveness;
‘Tit for tat’ retaliations;
Striving for the ‘spotlight’ and attention;
Excessive generosity to outside people;
Uncomfortable when others are incurring attention or praise;
If can’t be centre of attention will either discredit or leave the experience;
May fake illnesses or problems to procure attention / sympathy;
Abusive verbal behaviour when angered or insecure;
Tendency toward violent and even criminal behaviour;
Inappropriate and inapplicable language in front of women and children;
Dark moods that affect others;
False promises;
Glorifies and falsifies achievements past and present;
Expects to be recognised and praised;
Finds others not complying with wants intolerable;
Extreme sensitivity to criticism;
Extreme defensiveness when confronted;
Pathological lying;
Disdain for rules, regulations, decency and morality;
Childish outbursts and behaviour;
Very little consideration for how behaviour affects others;
Extreme lack of compassion or sensitivity towards love partners (and others') problems;
Grossly unsupportive to familiars in times of need;
Brushes incidences under the carpet;
Uses allies real or imagined to back up claims and arguments;
Uses guilt and manipulation to influence love partners;
Doesn’t trust love partners;
Tendency towards unreasonable jealousy and possessiveness;
Capable of sexually degrading name calling;
Can steal, harm or hide property to sabotage love partners;
Uses vengeance, threats and intimidation to control ;
Uses excessive charm and manipulation to control;
Little (if any) sense of conscience;
Discredits love partners to gain attention / sympathy from others;
Will ‘attack’ when confronted or questioned;
Emotionally punishes love partners when feeling insecure;
Emotionally punishes love partners when they are struggling with issues, losses, grief or challenges;
Employs unpredictable and unaccountable behaviour;
Capable of ‘disgusting’ behaviour to gain the upper hand and control a situation;
Feels powerful and fulfilled when creating powerlessness in another;
Gross failure to apologise or have sympathy after creating tears, distress or trauma to the love partner.

Common Expressions of a Narcissist
“I had them eating out of my hands.”
(Believes in manipulating others to create results).


“You didn’t let me finish what I was saying.”
(After verbally maiming and then pretending there was more to say)


“Just because I didn’t do what you wanted when you wanted it.”
(A justification for receptively breaking promises)


“Just because I didn’t say what you wanted to hear.”
(A justification for verbal abuse)


“You’re the only person who misunderstands what I say. You’re totally over-emotional.”
(Same as above)


“I’m sorry, what more do you want from me.”
(Followed by justifications for the behaviour with body language that is clearly not aligned with an apology)


“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry.”
(Followed by repetitive unacceptable behaviour)


“Why can’t you just get over the past?”
(Followed by repetitive unacceptable behaviour)


“What about your issues?”
(When failing to take responsibility for unacceptable behaviour)


“You make me behave like this.”
(Same applies for above)


“You’re the only person in the world I have these problems with.”
(Same applies for above)


“You act like my mother,” or, “You’re a control freak.”
(When asked for the truth or trustworthy / accountable behaviour)


Gaslighting Techniques used by the Narcissist
Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse that is used by narcissists that is deeply insidious and difficult to pinpoint. It works by instilling confusion. If you are being gaslighted you'll lose trust in your senses, identity and common environment.

The narcissist will tell you:

What you are feeling and thinking;
An interaction that you believed was decent with another person actually had agendas connected to it;
Your body language appears suggestive to other people;
A friend or family member has made certain references about you;
You were seen in a certain place acting inappropriately;
You said or did something (you weren’t aware of) when tired, distracted, unaware, intoxicated or asleep;
Certain information was discovered about you;
Certain people (you thought were loyal) are now agreeing about your faults;
The incident (created by the narcissist) was your fault, or merely a perception based on your paranoia or unstable emotions;
An excuse for the incidence based on a ‘story’ that extracts guilt from you, whereby you feel awful for making the ‘judgement’ you did;
Other people perceive you as bossy, controlling, manipulative, uncaring, incapable etc. (defective in some way).


Narcissists refuse to remain ‘Topical’

A narcissist will dodge accountability in a discussion in a variety of ways

Telling you repetitively to lower your voice;
Interrupting you with unrelated conversation;
Telling you to let them finish what they are saying whilst continuing to be psychologically and verbally abusive;
Making references to allies and unrelated people;
Telling you the matter is resolved without validating the conversation in a way that allows you to feel resolved;
Asking if you are happy to get that off your chest and then changing the topic;
Throwing in an abusive unrelated comment to anger or upset you;
Refusing to discuss the issue with you;
Bringing up an issue they are unhappy about, and treating that as the focus of conversation.


The Narcissistic Partner’s Addiction
Sadly, because narcissists inflict such severe psychological abuse upon love partners, a perverse addiction often occurs. The ‘victim’ has idolised the narcissist by seeing them as ‘the ideal partner’ (the illusion created via charm that the narcissist originally used to hook the partner) and continuously tries to win the approval, love and trust of the narcissist. There are many other reasons why this addiction occurs which are outlined in the article Narcissism Understood, my book Breaking the Chains of Painful Love and my eBook ‘How to Recognise and Heal Narcissistic Abuse’.

To the outside world it may seem that the love partner is deranged and is the problem (the narcissist has expertly created this illusion). The narcissist will often appear strong and stable to extended family, acquaintances, counsellors and even authorities. Tragically in many cases the love partner will believe that they are in fact damaged, incapable, no good and defective. They often think they are at fault. Such feelings are the result of a severely diminished sense of identity and a battered self-esteem. Many narcissistic love partners suffer profound depression and even severe physical deterioration. Frighteningly, many victims of narcissism don’t recover their sense of self, even years after the relationship has expired.

Narcissism addiction and devastation is a common occurrence and can happen to any individual from any demographic. Generally this condition occurs to women, and this is regardless of their level of intelligence and self-sufficiency. The disease of narcissistic addiction is an emotionally based issue, it has little to do with practical and mental capabilities or physical attributes.



This article is an excerpt from the books,
Breaking The Chains of Painful Love and Take Back Your Power.

Alot of truth here..after dealing with such a female i can relate to everything in this article/information

 

[will_right]

Wow! So its basically mental abuse to the victim!

Times 10

 

[will_right]

Thank you. The real fucked up part about it is the shit is like a horror film. She's fucking dude, but she expects me to continue to pay for her lifestyle. She told the judge she needs 21k a month to live. She was awarded 10k a month which is more net than I make a month. It will take me years to rebuild what I lost. The fight for my children is because I know she sees them primarily as pawns to get dough. She is incapable of love or displaying character. I have been asked if I saw any of this from the beginning and to a degree I did. But she was fine, the pussy was good, and in my arrogance I thought she would embrace the world I was providing for her. She did, but she never embraced me. Just today she said she wants to pull the kids out of private school because she doesn't want to pay half the costs. Moral of the story#2?

You can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit.