No, Im grown. Are you 18? Because not many bitches in my age range don't have kids. Now I guess I could find plenty if I started dating young hoes
31
never had to date a woman with kids
Could you marry a sista that has a child with a CAC?
- Thread starter ^SpiderMan^
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31
never had to date a woman with kids
Well good for you my guy. And have you wifed any of those bitches?
Because to be 31 and not have dated a single women that had kids, one of them broads had to be wifey material right????
i had a situation like that once for a sister i really cared for, but her family moved out the country when we were getting serious, years alter and older now , shes back in the states with a kid from some cac , that made it really hard to take her seriously, i cant even smash anymore even thought shes still very desirable to me..but... i just...,
im still and will always try my best to be a good friend to her and her kid but she always tryna push for me to do more and be more, and i sincerely cant, but i just cant!, given that i have a chance to start my family fresh without the baggage to kick it off.. yeah its tuff especially if u cared/care about the sister but theres a psychological/spiritual element i cant , i might ve considerd it seriously if her ex was a brother but i cant ignore that single fact..
this devil-cracka who built this hellhole and his people ,who've put my people thru hell on earth ! and now seeded up a blkwmn, and i get to take responsibilty for it somehow ..idk man
then
the other one sister ,who was like my number 2 on my heirarchy in the day,got away as we were gettin to be closer, she got with someone from puffy's camp , years later they broke up , she got a 4yr old (beautiful lilttle girl),he was total jack ass to her, and shes grown up wiser and more spiritual these days, and i see her in a newer light , but sometimes i wonder , if shes only wiser and more spiritual now after the bs disappointment and madness she went thru with her baby daddy., .but if i ever was to get with a sister with a kid, it would likely be her, becos i see her making strides to be more grounded and light filled and she has a baby girl with a brother so ..while shawty #1 has a boy with the cac ,..so..idk bruh
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As a matter of fact, I'm about to ask my girl to marry me this easter
I chose to focus on career first and have fun
till i was ready to settle down. Most of my ex's are now married
none of them had kids when we dated.
yeah im in my 30s too and yes i do meet them now , those sisters whom i can genuinely say are wifey material, but i just cant help but think i still have a chance to build with someone from scratch without the baggage..so.. maybe ure a wiser and better man
Or maybe Im just hating because every woman Ive dated after the age of 27 had at least 1 kid
I am not after marriage. The goals I have in life can be helped by a female. So I could see myself with the sister if she has already woke up and started to change. Or if I wake her up and she changes. Life for me is all about real blackness finally start breathing free with out having to be in a choke hold all the time or worrying about getting caught up in a choke hold.
if im dating her then i accept she has a kid with a white person
so. that's that. im not dating anyone seriously who i wouldn't consider marrying.
so. that's that. im not dating anyone seriously who i wouldn't consider marrying.
So after it happened 2 times with women you love...isnt it time to put all that other bullshit aside and try life with one of these women
You bring up some really good points.
My two cents,
If this woman was color struck her friend wouldn't have hyped her up to you.
Beyond self hatred a lot of Black women choose white men because they act submissive. That's why most white men in I/R relationships tend to be small and effeminate. It is possible that she got tired of wearing the pants and dropped him. If so she could easily do it on relatively good terms. You can't stay mad at someone just because you grew apart, especially if you have a child together.
IMO your biggest problem is if this dude is NOT effeminate and just got out of jail for busting her last boyfriend's ass. Worse yet, she could still have feeling for him and be laying up on the low.
You dudes in ya early 30s...in about 5 years you will discover a plethora of women at your disposal and every sexual need. By that she the real bad ones who have been groupies since high school will have been forced out of the game just like they did to the women before them and so I and so on. They are ready to be married to normal guys now because they missed the chance on the groupie level to land that one golden ticket. So now young brothers all of that pussy is ready to be gotten...AGAIN...
Many of these women will have mixed kids...due to the past 10 years black women have had this desire to have mixed kids. Many of you will fall for these women and have some happy times...but you can't experience tbat life if you close women out
Mfs already limit themselves because they don't like fat women...or short, tall,fit,thick,skinny...see it makes you not appreciate a woman at all
Many of these women will have mixed kids...due to the past 10 years black women have had this desire to have mixed kids. Many of you will fall for these women and have some happy times...but you can't experience tbat life if you close women out
Mfs already limit themselves because they don't like fat women...or short, tall,fit,thick,skinny...see it makes you not appreciate a woman at all
I feel you. My son's mother was the first woman i've dated seriously with kids and she is a piece of work. Prior to her I never seriously dated a woman with a kid either. That said, if you have a child yourself, your perspective changes. Now I'd prefer a woman with a kid so I can assess her parenting skills.
Bro be careful with that... I been there done that and realized we all grow up very different and what you may see as rude they see as being forward. Dating or marrying any woman with kids is going to require a lot of understanding and patience and most of all time to really become diff and better parents together
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and vice versa for the nigg@# lovers who want to goback to dating white boys. lol
I can see why ud say that but dont i have a choice to be fully fulfilled while i still have the chance to do it?
First of all....Fuck marriage. It's just not worth it for men to marry these days. Most likely it will fail, then you'll have to pay alimony, give up 1/2 assets etc. Plus, if you were raising that cac child of hers and the real father is dead or whatever they will make you pay child support for that nigga. Man fuck these ho's. I advise all of you to never get married (until you're about 65-75 years old)
i feel u bruh ,u can save all their pussies on behalf of the struggle!!
i just cant put in that effort, i already have other struggles im involved with on behalf of our people, but we can setup an agency of bruhs who wanna do the work and u can be in charge, we all have our positions to play in the struggle
and no i dont care what position her white ex is in, or what he makes or how much he has (that which society has ill gottenly gifted him the access to) means zip to me
I AM A GOD and i come first, i only bow to another god blackman becos he is my kin in that sense. and so therefore "until we can replace the system of white supremacy with true justice and feedom for all " i cant be anything but a disciple of my afrikan brothers first . ill never pick up after a whiteman
When did you get to this point...what happened
Bad experience man. So many chicks with babies don't give the kids structure to know a child's place. Oftentimes, they try to replace the man with the child.
So often, the child sleeps in the mother's bed... all the time. When I come over, it's a struggle to get the kid to sleep in its own bed. I can't fuck the mama if the kid is laying there right next to her.
Bedtime, no structure. These women leave the child's bedtime up to them. That is a no-go. An 8 or 9 year old kid should have at bedtime around 8 or 8:30. I have met women who have let their kids stay up until after midnight. One in particular, it's 2 o'clock in the morning and this kid is still sitting in between her and I playing video games. That was my last. Bedtimes are for parents, not just for kids.
Just as there would have to be a very super special white woman to have me end up with a white chick, there would have to be a very super duper mother fucking special single mother to have me end up with a single mother. Kids are hard enough to tolerate when they're your own, having to reprogram a kid and a mother at the same time...nah
i feel u bruh ,u can save all their pussies on behalf of the struggle!!
i just cant put in that effort, i already have other struggles im involved with on behalf of our people, but we can setup an agency of bruhs who wanna do the work and u can be in charge, we all have our positions to play in the struggle
and no i dont care what position her white ex is in, or what he makes or how much he has (that which society has ill gottenly gifted him the access to) means zip to me
I AM A GOD and i come first, i only bow to another god blackman becos he is my kin in that sense. and so therefore "until we can replace the system of white supremacy with true justice and feedom for all " i cant be anything but a disciple of my afrikan brothers first . ill never pick up after a whiteman
Look man... lets keep it real. We won't see the system of white supremacy change during our lifetime. I don't have to express or tell people I'm down for my people and talk the Africa unite slogans so people will see me. All mine are do me by actions on a level it will count. My main conversation with young brothers in college and the league is pool your money together for 2 things...black ownership in sports and leagues for the inner city kids and show them love cause one day when they make it they will repeat what I was taught by the older brothers who some the same thing. We can't reach everyone but those we do help change lives as well
Real shit
You don't have any kids bro? You don't plan to have any?
That's real...but did you communicate to her about those types of things or did you just automatically think she thought the exact same way you thought on things?
A woman is going to be work no matter if she has a kid or not. I'm sure there are some things about you women say needs to improve Right? Bro some of yall gotta learn how to grow together with these women and stop going into relationships thinking you got it all figured out.
I see posts after fucking post on here about mfs for the cause, mfs talking about how we as a people need to stick together and help our black sisters....but some of you allow basic communication to end relationships....
Life don't wait on no one...figure it out before time expires on you
I'm on the fence, one part says yes the other says nah, to be honest it would be all in her mindset and way she acted
No. Don't have any kids. I hope to have some, but I'm sick of the shit I stated with single moms.
I feel you, but shit. Stop having kids with bullshit mofos. It's that simple. I'm sure it's the same for women without kids trying to find a man without kids
I don't want someone else's bastards running around. I don't claim to have anything figured out, but damn, use some sort of birth control. Most other issues can be sorted out, but constant proof of her previous relationship is not cool IMO
yep im involved in these same things and more and honestly, im just not cut out for that work with a sister with a kid from a cac(maybe ill mateur as i get older idk), and no i dont go announcing hoteps and shit , i stay quietly doing the work and helping bruhs in organizations and rivate situations who are in the frontline with resources to do them get it done, so its far from that but atleast on the above we're both 100% in agreement. much respect GOD blackman! i will honor u before i can honor the other!
Man black people are sooo confused, this is one of the reasons we are in the condition we're in. I don't care to elaborate any more. I will say this tho, reading through the comments the main problem I see is we don't have a code about anything, everybody has a different definition of what marriage is and what it represents, it will be a longggggg time before we get out of this condition. Everyone ask themselves this question, how often do you see a white man marry a white woman who was married to a black guy and has a kid by a black guy?
Everytime!!...also I'm coming to another understanding ,that the passion I might have had for either of them, can be gotten back in the right situations,
why do I have to contort and conform myself to another's reality?,
no matter how much I mightve been into either of those sisters, if I take the same energy into another situation I can easily see me finding someone else,
I believe one of the biggest issues with marriage and mating in the West, is that we've been programmed to believe it's all about romantic love and shit, so we get kinda lazy and complacent and leave shit to the movie storybook take on chance,!!
our ancestors were unto something with arranged marriages , as I get older, i can now see how there is some merit to that system, marriage is a business ultimately and too many enter it based on frivolous assumptions, especially romantic, im starting to see how "respect" trumps "love" when it comes to finding finding an ideal female partner
I would never allow myself to be in this situation but theoretical logic tells me
to look at it beyond the race, with a consideration to if he a broke CAC who don't give a fuck then NO, if he got money and really care about his seed the YES if she is still an attractive wifey worthy broad. I say this because it's the same logic I would apply to any race of baby daddy that may be around my kids, if we have a child or children together.
Focusing on a broads past makes no sense to me, in my experience the best
of the good girls got so much shit in there past, that most of them won't tell u
to save their life, a lot of cats and maybe it's you would leave their
girlfriends or wives the minute she told you blow by blow the sexual past she
has, the stank thugs or random co-worker that would blow your mind
that she slept with or had a one night stand and did some freaky shit over drinks
most katz need to learn to live for the future and if the one you want done has a baby with a CAC then so be it if the child support and respect
is there it really should not make a difference, but if she fucked a redneck hillbilly and he hate her and the kid and don't have a pot to piss in, hell no!
..but it would be the same if he was black.
to look at it beyond the race, with a consideration to if he a broke CAC who don't give a fuck then NO, if he got money and really care about his seed the YES if she is still an attractive wifey worthy broad. I say this because it's the same logic I would apply to any race of baby daddy that may be around my kids, if we have a child or children together.
Focusing on a broads past makes no sense to me, in my experience the best
of the good girls got so much shit in there past, that most of them won't tell u
to save their life, a lot of cats and maybe it's you would leave their
girlfriends or wives the minute she told you blow by blow the sexual past she
has, the stank thugs or random co-worker that would blow your mind
that she slept with or had a one night stand and did some freaky shit over drinks
most katz need to learn to live for the future and if the one you want done has a baby with a CAC then so be it if the child support and respectis there it really should not make a difference, but if she fucked a redneck hillbilly and he hate her and the kid and don't have a pot to piss in, hell no!
..but it would be the same if he was black.
I was talking to a white woman about abortion in a group and she said she was against it
After the group left I talked to her by herself and she said that she had had 3 already. I asked her why and she told me that her mother told her that no decent white man wants a woman with kids.
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