whats the DUMBEST thing youve ever done 4 some pussy? (pt. 1)

[Otis Supreme]

naturallly ill go 1st.

this was some years back. i drove a hour and 15 4 the pussy.....and it wasnt a girlfriend.




but in my defense, she ALSO drove the same distance 2 c me and once even rode up here w/her homegirl, took me back 2 her crib, and the next morn took me back. home.




*rubs hands 2gether*

i know this thread is bout 2 get HILARIOUS.

 

[the Imm font]

actually try to impress a chick instead of ignoring them

 

[RoadRage]

Got Married!

Just joking.​

 

[jwilliam85]

Pay for it because of peer pressure.

 

[Otis Supreme]

Got Married!

Just joking.​

Pay for it because of peer pressure.

 

[ClevelandDawg216]

went to projects to pick this chick up, not knowing her baby daddy lived in the building right across from hers. nigga was hangin out in the courtyard with a gang of niggas, and i just walked passed them. came out with the bitch and walked passed them again. in hindsight, shit could have gone bad.

 

[yureeka9]

Probably taken time off from work. And the bitch didn't even show up!

 

[Jagi]

probably taken a cab from the bronx to brooklyn and back to the bronx.

 

[Otis Supreme]

went to projects to pick this chick up, not knowing her baby daddy lived in the building right across from hers. nigga was hangin out in the courtyard with a gang of niggas, and i just walked passed them. came out with the bitch and walked passed them again. in hindsight, shit could have gone bad.

i wouldnt call that stupid cleve. aint like u KNEW.

now if u woulda known thats another story.

Probably taken time off from work. And the bitch didn't even show up!

but seriously....

probably taken a cab from the bronx to brooklyn and back to the bronx.

is that a long way?

 

[gameboy]

back in the day, me & my homie met these 2 college freaks at the club,,, we were freaking the shit out of them on the dance floor,,, we exchanged numbers, , but we didn't hit it that night,,, & they lived 3 hours away,,, my chick was telling me on the phone that their college town was boring, & that me & my homie should come down & see them one weekend,,,

so about 2 weeks later, we decide to drive down there,,, the dumb thing was we didn't call them first, we just popped up on them,,, the chick my dude was hollering at had a man, but we didn't know that until we got down there (& her boyfriend was a white surfer/stoner dude ),,, & my chick had went home for the weekend,,,

so we basically went on 6 hour tour (round trip) & didn't see any parts of the pussy,,, damn i feel like a dumbass even telling this story

 

[Otis Supreme]

back in the day, me & my homie met these 2 college freaks at the club,,, we were freaking the shit out of them on the dance floor,,, we exchanged numbers, , but we didn't hit it that night,,, & they lived 3 hours away,,, my chick was telling me on the phone that their college town was boring, & that me & my homie should come down & see them one weekend,,,

so about 2 weeks later, we decide to drive down there,,, the dumb thing was were didn't call them first, we just popped up on them,,, the chick my dude was hollering at had a man, but we didn't know that until we got down there (& her boyfriend was a white dude),,, & my chick had went home for the weekend,,,

so we basically went on 6 hour tour (round trip) & didn't see any parts of the pussy,,, damn i feel like a dumbass even telling this story

 

[fwillia]

It was back in high school during 11th grade on Columbus Day. I aint have a whip nor ride (Family moved to the sticks during Junior High) so I took a cab to go see this freshman girl I wanted to slay real bad. She lived far as hell and the ride ended up being like thirty something dollars. I get to her house and before we can even get into it, Her mom comes home on her lunch break! This bitch made me hide in her closet for like an hour and a half. I was in the fetal position next to mad winter clothes sweatin' like a slave. Then this bitch got the nerve to call all her little girlfriends like "you wouldn't believe who's in my closet" making me get on the phone to confirm that shit!

So her mom goes back to work and I beat. It was some great young pussy as a matter of fact. Worst part is it started raining on the cab ride back and I aint bring enough money for the cab to take me all the way home. I was George Jefferson strutin' for like the last 20 minutes.

 

[fwillia]

probably taken a cab from the bronx to brooklyn and back to the bronx.

Why you aint take the train?


















Yes Otis, that is far as hell.

 

[shams]

probably taken a cab from the bronx to brooklyn and back to the bronx.

you might as well of flew out of state. that's almost a round trip ticket.

 

[Otis Supreme]

It was back in high school during 11th grade on Columbus Day. I aint have a whip nor ride (Family moved to the sticks during Junior High) so I took a cab to go see this freshman girl I wanted to slay real bad. She lived far as hell and the ride ended up being like thirty something dollars. I get to her house and before we can even get into it, Her mom comes home on her lunch break! This bitch made me hide in her closet for like an hour and a half. I was in the fetal position next to mad winter clothes sweatin' like a slave. Then this bitch got the nerve to call all her little girlfriends like "you wouldn't believe who's in my closet" making me get on the phone to confirm that shit!

So her mom goes back to work and I beat. It was some great young pussy as a matter of fact. Worst part is it started raining on the cab ride back and I aint bring enough money for the cab to take me all the way home. I was George Jefferson strutin' for like the last 20 minutes.

fwillia u da homie but........







































ooooooh shit!

 

[Otis Supreme]

Yes Otis, that is far as hell.

damn. oh ok.

 

[yaBoi]

It was back in high school during 11th grade on Columbus Day. I aint have a whip nor ride (Family moved to the sticks during Junior High) so I took a cab to go see this freshman girl I wanted to slay real bad. She lived far as hell and the ride ended up being like thirty something dollars. I get to her house and before we can even get into it, Her mom comes home on her lunch break! This bitch made me hide in her closet for like an hour and a half. I was in the fetal position next to mad winter clothes sweatin' like a slave. Then this bitch got the nerve to call all her little girlfriends like "you wouldn't believe who's in my closet" making me get on the phone to confirm that shit!

So her mom goes back to work and I beat. It was some great young pussy as a matter of fact. Worst part is it started raining on the cab ride back and I aint bring enough money for the cab to take me all the way home. I was George Jefferson strutin' for like the last 20 minutes.

 

[PsyenceRawk]

i got whipped once freshman year in college... my first time fuckin wit a foreign girl (El Salvador)... this chick had a fetish for dark skin black men. she was mixed latina/black, but lawd have mercy was she the finest thing i had ever seen back then in a tight lil 5'3 120lbs package.

she approached me on some "damn i'm feelin you and your style" type shit. we talked for a few weeks, then she finally gave me da pussy... a nigga was hooked.

my roommate was out in malaysia for some fam shit, so i had my dorm room to myself for 2 weeks. she came through around 1am friday night, with a blunt and some redbull( ). we blazed and watched the first 20 min of "Hunchback of Notre Dame", when we started slobbin each other down when she said the magic line i've always wanted a woman to say to me... "I WANT YOU TO FUCK ME NOW" with that sexy ass spanish accent... nigga i was on ROCK! she did and said freaky ass shit both in english and spanish. the head was incroyable! first time gettin deep throated, this chick liked to gag, she even took my hand and put it on her head and pressed down! WOOOO! after the 2nd time we fucked, i was buyin this bitch vicky's secret from the mall. i bought this bitch a damn vibrator, a pair of puma's and a damn puma backpack... my niggas was at me when she started fuckin wit some big ass military nigga, and i was still chasin this bitch around...

never EVER again... "YOU CAN'T BE PUSSY WHIPPED, YOU GOTTA WHIP DAT PUSSY!"
BANG BANG BANG!

 

[gameboy]

hit it off with this chick at a party on LSU's campus,,, a cute, slim louisiana chick who i had met before, but never hit,,,, she said she had just broke up with her man,,, we danced damn near all night,,,

told my homies to go ahead & roll, & i rode to her house with her,,, both of us are drunk,,, banged it out good,,, about 8am, we are both woken up by a knock at the door,,, it's her damn boyfriend,,, she tells me go in her sisters room (who was her roommate & was at work) & she would get rid of him real fast,,,

man,,, this bitch cooked breakfast for him, cried with him & even gave him some head (i think),,, all the while i'm hiding in her damn sisters room for an hour with hay fever, trying not to sneeze,,, & dude kept saying "i wish i would've found a dude in here,,, i would've fucked you & him up"

the dude finally leaves & i wanted to smack the shit out of her for that,,, she took me home & we never talked again

 

[Coldchi]

When I was a sophomore at Georgia Southern....i met a bitch on Collegeclub.com She lived about 20-25 miles away. At the time I had no car, and this bitch was promising me the pussy. So I went on campus and stole the first bike i could get my hands on and Lance Armstrong'd to that hoe's house. My ass muscles were almost hurtin too much to fuck. The hoe actually had the audacity to laugh at me when she found out a rode a bike to her crib. I made her ass pay for that shit when the belly smackin commenced tho.

 

[Otis Supreme]

and i thought I did some stupid shit.

 

[D-TOWN REP]

This is probably the biggest simp moment of my life but fuck it I have nothing to be ashamed of I have had mo pussy than a little bit...but yeah..

So this bitch I used to fuck with that be fuckin with females too tells me to come by her house at like 10 cuz she "braidin hair" So im like cool get over there and call no answer...call again no answer then the hoe gonna text me "whats up" im like shit im at yo crib she said was still bradin...so im like yeah so can I step in?? No answer so im just sittin in my car outside her apartments not sure which one it was cuz she had moved and I hand't been to the new one yet...I wait like 45 min to a little over a hour, then I bounce...hoe gonna text me like can I bring he some mcdonalds...a dollar spicy mcchicken so I go to the one down the street pull back up and I see this bull dyke lookin bitch walk to her car and drive off...then that hoe was outside wit her dog called me talkin bout she ready...I was fuckin pissed cuz all that fake ass game she was tryin to pull unecessary...coulda just kept it real...especially wit me cuz I dunn dunn it all...so I go and fuck that bitch brains out...had her screaming and damn near in tears...I don't fuck with that hoe no more cuz she always trying to run game instead of keeping it 100...can't like tho that shit is good

 

[THREAD_CRITIC]

Broke up with a good 6 just to be with a classless dirty bitch who was a dimepiece

 

[O.J PIMPSON]

went to Brownsville......................do you need to know any more

 

[ScottyPiffen745]

Told the bitch I loved her and didn't mean it.

I didn't even mean to say it, one day I had trip the girl up at school, and she ended up hurting her foot, then later on that day she walked up to me all limping and shit, and she said something to me and pointed at her foot. I didn't hear her what she said cuz I had headphones on, so jokingly I said "I'm sorry......I love you" then she walked away with a big ass Kool-Aid smile on her face, and at that point I realized I might have made a big mistake. That was before I knew how strong those 3 words can be. The next day, she all smiles and giggles at me and calling me baby and cute little nicknames and all that donkey shit, hugging me and lettin me grab her booty (which was pretty nice). So she was throwin' it at me, so I had no choice but to hit it out the park. Then after I hit it, she started getting mad clingy and jealous when I talked to other girls. She was cock-juggling thundercunt hoe anyway, she was fucking a new dude by the next week. But anyway ever since then I've never said those words to another bitch I didn't really love again.

Now everytime a bitch say she love me, I just say "........oh word?...........cool.....aight.......uh bye?" or if I want to hit it, I'll give her the "I'm no good, I'm a bad guy" story.

 

[ebonymanej]

when i was in high school walked about 2 miles each way to smash late one night because I didn't want moms to hear me take off on my motorcycle and catch me out late .I lived at the top of a cul de sac street that was on a incline so I could have coasted out but would have had to try to push it back uphill to get it home with no noise. I got stoped by the cops walking home at 3:30 am. A black kid walking through Diamond bar, ca in the early 80s socal peeps know how liily white this city was back then. luckly he let me go. what makes it really stupid is that i rode over there the next day and smashed again. just had to wait a few hours . It was all good though she was an italian girl with that sunshine and I was 15. i got a few more i'll think of to share later

 

[woodchuck]

(sigh) Before i tell this story, I wanna say, Fuck y'all! Fuck all y'all! Okay, here goes:

I met this one chick in Miami who was bi, a freak, and a DIME!!! She comes by the hotel and scoops me up to take me to her place. We get to the crib and there's this Mayor McCheese looking fat bitch there, and they both are on some threesome shit. Yeah, I fucked them both. I had to hit McCheese to get to the dime.

 

[jwilliam85]

When I was a sophomore at Georgia Southern....i met a bitch on Collegeclub.com She lived about 20-25 miles away. At the time I had no car, and this bitch was promising me the pussy. So I went on campus and stole the first bike i could get my hands on and Lance Armstrong'd to that hoe's house. My ass muscles were almost hurtin too much to fuck. The hoe actually had the audacity to laugh at me when she found out a rode a bike to her crib. I made her ass pay for that shit when the belly smackin commenced tho.

Nigga you stole a bike to get some pussy? Only people around my way I know that steal bikes to go places is crackheads.

 

[Otis Supreme]

When I was a sophomore at Georgia Southern....i met a bitch on Collegeclub.com She lived about 20-25 miles away. At the time I had no car, and this bitch was promising me the pussy. So I went on campus and stole the first bike i could get my hands on and Lance Armstrong'd to that hoe's house. My ass muscles were almost hurtin too much to fuck. The hoe actually had the audacity to laugh at me when she found out a rode a bike to her crib. I made her ass pay for that shit when the belly smackin commenced tho.

(sigh) Before i tell this story, I wanna say, Fuck y'all! Fuck all y'all! Okay, here goes:

I met this one chick in Miami who was bi, a freak, and a DIME!!! She comes by the hotel and scoops me up to take me to her place. We get to the crib and there's this Mayor McCheese looking fat bitch there, and they both are on some threesome shit. Yeah, I fucked them both. I had to hit McCheese to get to the dime.

Nigga you stole a bike to get some pussy? Only people around my way I know that steal bikes to go places is crackheads.

 

[DarkCity]

Met this chick on myspace before it was really popping a couple years back. Talked on the phone a couple times and she wanted me to come see her. So I drive out there (about an hour and some change) and this chick is the ugliest chick I have ever seen in my life. Bitch look like a dirty ostrich, I was mad as hell. She taking me around her town showing me off to her friends and shit. So I am out there for about an hour and just pull over to this parking lot. (I drove all this way I was gonna get a nut) and this bitch goes and kisses me in the mouth. She had the most chapped lips in the world and I can still taste that homemade tasting lipgloss she had on. I got my nut dropped her off and took the LONGEST ride of shame back home.

 

[Tha Iron Fist]

Man, you ninja's is crazy.


Not the dumbest thing but I remember this time there was this fine red and ninja's was on her tuff so I acted like I didnt even notice her. *she said my fuck you attitude and brash demeanor trumpted all the ninja's in her face begging for it.*

and one time I played the friend role back in the day. My boy was smashing this sister *5'4'', 120 lbs great curves a strong 7-8 from alaska* in our barracks but ole girl loved her some me had me own her insurance and all that shit, would sleep in the bed with her at night drive her car and some mo shit, when my boy found out I had been causing gut renovations he was pissed at me but I would have never did it if I wasn't cool with her.

 

[CPT Callamity]

Trip longer than an hour. Actually it was 3. It wasn't worth it in the long run so I had to learn from that.

 

[Punch]

My absolute dumbest was...fooling around with a broad who had a live in man errrr husband...he was at work (alledgedly)...we upstairs in their townhome buck nekkid ...he banging on the front door...I scoop my clothes up off the floor tip toe to guest bedroom closet while she let him in...that nigga came in all loud and shit, and he brought his homeboy..maybe for backup...he mustve knew I was punishing them guts..Them 2 niggas stayed there well over 2 hours..I got dressed in the closet trying not to laugh (thinking what do I say if he open the door)..I fell asleep...she woke me up we left and had sex in my car.

 

[ClevelandDawg216]

some good shit in here.

aiiight, another time i met this college chick at the club, and she was a fine dark-skinned thickie (not you niggas version of thick, but a bitch that was toned up). anyway, she to kent state which was like 45 mins away, and i didn't have a roller at the time, so i told her to hook something up with one of her girls, so i could get my nigga to drive down. she like "bet". me and my nigga get down there, and she like, "yeah, my girl aint here, and yall niggas cant stay in my dormroom" . so, i'm feelin' bad for my boy, cuz i know he thought i prolly played him on some shit, but the chick i was getting on was really feelin' my style, so i'm like, let's get a telly. we go to some norman bates looking shit, and when we get there, i forget i done gave this nigga most of my money for gas. so, i'm trying to play it off like what am i gonna do, and as i get out the car i see a key with a room number on the ground. i snatch that bitch up, and act like i went to the desk and got that bitch, so we go to the room number and it was vacant.

anyway, so it's me, this bitch and my nigga, in a room with one bed. to make things worse, this nigga i was with wasn't really no playa type dude, and he was in extra hater mode cuz the chick girl aint show up. i take the nigga to side like, "eh, man, i'm about to clap this bitch. you aint gotta leave, but i'm a need this bed." the nigga just sat on the floor and watched pornos and got his peek on while i did my thing. come to think of it, the story turned out pretty good for me, so i guess he was the one lookin' stupid.

 

[DarkCity]

Met this chick on myspace before it was really popping a couple years back. Talked on the phone a couple times and she wanted me to come see her. So I drive out there (about an hour and some change) and this chick is the ugliest chick I have ever seen in my life. Bitch look like a dirty ostrich, I was mad as hell. She taking me around her town showing me off to her friends and shit. So I am out there for about an hour and just pull over to this parking lot. (I drove all this way I was gonna get a nut) and this bitch goes and kisses me in the mouth. She had the most chapped lips in the world and I can still taste that homemade tasting lipgloss she had on. I got my nut dropped her off and took the LONGEST ride of shame back home.