Shit...I had to go the long way to stay in this muffucka... counseling, mental breakdowns, attempt suicide, lockdowns, extreme abuse applied...but just when I got comfortable with being abused...it all stopped...I was lost as hell without being abused...for a Long time...I was looking to be abused and beat..and treated like shit...Abused people suffa from PTSD....And it takes years to recover... brah
Know Anyone to Commit (or try) Suicide?
- Thread starter Gazoo
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Shit...I had to go the long way to stay in this muffucka... counseling, mental breakdowns, attempt suicide, lockdowns, extreme abuse applied...but just when I got comfortable with being abused...it all stopped...I was lost as hell without being abused...for a Long time...I was looking to be abused and beat..and treated like shit...Abused people suffa from PTSD....And it takes years to recover... brah
Bruh... I understand on a whole lot of levels thank you for sharing. We get seen as either animals or inanimate emotionless objects. But we got feelings emotions and all that shit. We can only absorb so much. that shit stays it lingers it stains. We try every damn day to fight. That's why it's so dangerous to push the wrong buttons.
Respect bruh
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When I was an instructor in the Army we had this kid at the range that just said he was done. He didn't wanna train. Didn't wanna do none of this military shit no mo. I didn't yell at him or scream at him cuz I could tell from looking that him that he was a goner. I said ok you're done and we sent him back to his unit. Unfortunately for him he was infantry and his unit didn't give a fuck because that's not how it works. You can't just quit. He deployed anyhow and ended up blowing his brains out. Non combat related death.
Another cat I knew (not that well) shot his battalion commander and killed himself after.... IEDs fucked up his head. There was this other time this dude blew his brains out in the phone center cuz his hoe ass wife was fucking around while deployed. I didn't see it though and he was some random soldier. They were all white.
Another cat I knew (not that well) shot his battalion commander and killed himself after.... IEDs fucked up his head. There was this other time this dude blew his brains out in the phone center cuz his hoe ass wife was fucking around while deployed. I didn't see it though and he was some random soldier. They were all white.
We gotta be careful
To not attach suicide to white folk
Black folk go thru 10 times the pain from day 1
We can't create some type of excuse to treat that as normal
Or deserved
Or some badge of honor
We are not SUPPOSED to be hurt and be tortured and beat down and degraded and cowed...
We are human beings
in fact we feel more and are more attached to nature and the spiritual and the universe.
Our pain is real.
Not contrived or exaggerated
Suicide should not be a judgment of failure or weakness.
You do NOT know what another person is going through inside or been through already.
To not attach suicide to white folk
Black folk go thru 10 times the pain from day 1
We can't create some type of excuse to treat that as normal
Or deserved
Or some badge of honor
We are not SUPPOSED to be hurt and be tortured and beat down and degraded and cowed...
We are human beings
in fact we feel more and are more attached to nature and the spiritual and the universe.
Our pain is real.
Not contrived or exaggerated
Suicide should not be a judgment of failure or weakness.
You do NOT know what another person is going through inside or been through already.
I didnt know the dude personally, but met a military guy briefly at a cookout. Thrown by a coworker of mine. And found out later in the year, dude took his own life. I was told he was tired of being called back to fight. He was in the process of being redeployed.
Two classmates.
One EVERYBODY knew was crazy. used to talk to people who werent there, used to think he was superior to everyone else and would tell you. dressed like a million bucks, hair was perpetually perfect, talented af. i thought he was just flamboyant but he had chicks. After highschool he hosted a local tv dance show, when it was cancelled he cancelled himself. Dude had to be only 21 or so.
The other was a high achiever dude. Was in the genius classes from 3rd grade on. In 5th grade we learned about the Mississippi river, specifically how you cant swim it because it has undertows that will drag you down and drown you. Fast forward 12 years later he jumped off the Mississippi River Bridge. When i found out it was like one of those Alfred Hitchcock reveal moments. He KNEW it would work since the 5th fucking grade. Supposedly he was depressed about his parents divorcing.
One EVERYBODY knew was crazy. used to talk to people who werent there, used to think he was superior to everyone else and would tell you. dressed like a million bucks, hair was perpetually perfect, talented af. i thought he was just flamboyant but he had chicks. After highschool he hosted a local tv dance show, when it was cancelled he cancelled himself. Dude had to be only 21 or so.
The other was a high achiever dude. Was in the genius classes from 3rd grade on. In 5th grade we learned about the Mississippi river, specifically how you cant swim it because it has undertows that will drag you down and drown you. Fast forward 12 years later he jumped off the Mississippi River Bridge. When i found out it was like one of those Alfred Hitchcock reveal moments. He KNEW it would work since the 5th fucking grade. Supposedly he was depressed about his parents divorcing.
While we often jump to the defense of person committing suicide. In many cases the person may have serious illness like Tony Dungy or Rick Warren's sons.
However, there's another group that just won't stand strong in the face of difficulties that we all have.
Aside from a chemical issue or an inevitable painful disease, suicide over a loss job, or a girlfriend that left is fucked up. You only hurt your family and friends afterwards.
However, there's another group that just won't stand strong in the face of difficulties that we all have.
Aside from a chemical issue or an inevitable painful disease, suicide over a loss job, or a girlfriend that left is fucked up. You only hurt your family and friends afterwards.
Does it bother you that you cut him off?
I was suicidal from being depressed for many years. Its funny how you can be sad, from being sad. Shit I'm still not ok, but I just take it one day at a time.
Never thought of that. People that are abused actually miss the abuse? I have to look up how the mental mechanics work in that way. Thanks for the enlightenment.
Were you depressed for specific reasons or for unknown reasons?
Know a few that succeeded.. literally eating bullets.. couple of jumping off buildings.. etc
know some that failed
and I actually had to intervene a few times from some people trying to take their life.. 1 of my boys thanks me to this day for reading his vague text and peeping that it was more to it and me jumping out of my bed and going to his house and literally talking to him for hrs on a reason to live
know some that failed
and I actually had to intervene a few times from some people trying to take their life.. 1 of my boys thanks me to this day for reading his vague text and peeping that it was more to it and me jumping out of my bed and going to his house and literally talking to him for hrs on a reason to live
Amazing that you were able to read into a vague text. Most suicide victims leave almost know clues.
Often times many of us have thought about but are too chicken to go through it. Thank goodness. Glad you were able to intervene. Was it something that happened to him that almost pushed him over the edge?
Funny we on this topic 1 of my childhood friends reached out to me during summer 2020 hadn’t speak to him in yrsss cause he moved from our block when we were teens.. his father happens to still live here and he asked his pops to get my number.. he actually was on verge of suicide with all the covid shit and mad problems at his job.. he said something about he was looking through old pictures and vids of me and him made him reach out to me.. ended up talking for like 4 hrs and had him die laughing on the phone about mad shit he missed, old childhood stories, updates on some of our boys, how I got into the adult industry.. he was thanking me for cheering him up and he was like he knew it was a reason he kept old pics and vids from 80s/90s.. we still keep in touch and he definitely doing much better mentally
Broke up with his girl, wasn’t happy with his financial situation, wasn’t happy with where he was in life.. just a bunch of stuff on top of stuff.. funny thing I’m usually the voice of reason for a lot of people orthe person when shit hit the fan everybody call on to let out frustrations, sadness, etc.. another reason why I’m always labeled the crazy cool friend.. his text was like yoooo you was always the coolest nig black don’t ever change I’m gonna miss you…. When I peep that miss you part it was like wtf this nig talking about I know he don’t mean what I think he meant..so I hit him real quick on the phone like wtf you mean gonna miss you.. he was like nah nothing don’t worry about it you my boy always than hung up the phone…I was in my bed like I swear to god this nig better not be thinking what I’m thinking..fuck it jumping out of bed putting on clothes going to his building knocking on his door.. he was shocked I showed up and was like nah don’t worry man nah don’t worry man.. than he started breaking down crying and it went from there
I think it does. I don't know if there's a term. But when someone is going through and they sit down and drink a bottle of Tequila or use a pound of heroin. They might not have been consciously thinking suicide, but on a subconscious level it's evident.
Some people just destroy their lives socially or financially or in their careers. Another form.
See that's where I'm probably fucked up for not being too sympathetic. He didn't have to do that. Just caused a lot of anguish for those that cared about him.
My uncle. Over his wife moving out of state with his kids.
Hey the stories I could tell you.. my best friend use to make jokes for yrs like imma buy you a cape cause you a hood superhero with all these people coming to you for help or you having to motivate, etc.. I mean literally just last Friday a chick from my hood her mother broke down to me how she overly stressed out and thinks she needs to go to rehab cause she got a drinking problem since the pandemic.. lady old enough to be my mother literally breaking down crying in the middle of the street.. she was like she didn’t even tell her daughter this or nobody and for some reason she was like I seemed like the right person to tell.. she was like she never felt so weak in her life.. I had to motivate her and say a lot of strong people been breaking down during this pandemic and that you only human which means you always naturally gonna have flaws and weaknesses so don’t feel bad just know that it’s great you pinpoint a problem and are willing to fix it..that right there makes you strong so all you got to do is go through it 1 day at a time.. she was mad happy and cried some more and was like she definitely bout to do it..she thanked the shit out of me.. I actually think it could’ve went somewhere else but I did not allow it cause of moral issues if you know what I mean but it definitely presented itself..in the end she was happy and went home with a new sense of motivationBro, you're a rock in your world. I hope it doesn't overwhelm you bearing so many others burdens. You sound like a great friend.
Let me buy you a beer.
I believe i may be undiagnosed bipolar/anxiety/schizophrenia. I have a tendency to convince myself bad things, about certain situations.
Similarly to you, I was and am the person someone comes to talk it out. I slowly pulled myself away from many of those relationships. Especially woman that just want yap endlessly about their not so bad lives. Then when they're okay you don't hear shit from them.
I kinda reserve myself for those that have had a loved one pass away. Hell, it got to the point I had a line of pastors and ministers. I was like, "physician heal thyself,"
Well then based on that definition, I think we all know someone who is purposely killing themselves as we speak, some of us are doing it right now, but would never say it out loud for fear of going to hell for their actions.
I feel you.. people just say I look approachable and tend to walk around with a smile or look like they don’t have no stress in their life.. it’s why random people will just start talking to me, or get random headnods, or chicks saying hi and smiling.. than Im just naturally a people person so it easy to have convo.. than I just naturally have this chill vibe cool energy crack jokes attitude.. lot of people don’t really have cool individuals they can talk to about certain subjects without judgement or actually listening to them, especially dudes, so I guess I naturally am the exception
The home inspector (white guy referred by my realtor) for my first house shot himself in his backyard.
He was apparently going through a divorce and his home inspection business wasn't doing great.
Fucked up thing was I had just seen him a few weeks before he killed himself because he came to do a follow-up inspection a year later.
Looking back, I could tell something was a little off because he wasn't with his wife like the first inspection (she helped during the first inspection) and he didn't seem as upbeat.
I'm sure others have as well (former classmates), just never confirmed by family for obvious reasons.
He was apparently going through a divorce and his home inspection business wasn't doing great.
Fucked up thing was I had just seen him a few weeks before he killed himself because he came to do a follow-up inspection a year later.
Looking back, I could tell something was a little off because he wasn't with his wife like the first inspection (she helped during the first inspection) and he didn't seem as upbeat.
I'm sure others have as well (former classmates), just never confirmed by family for obvious reasons.
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That's a mindset that black folks have got to get rid of.
I still hear folks talking about "He/she couldn't have killed themselves because they loved the lord too much".
No but during the early 80's black suicide was up. During slavery when conditions were intolerable we survived but now some people see no way out for themselves or their kids
Yeah, I agree.
Yo, I'm gonna keep it a buck.
When my daughter had cancer and it looked like she might die, I really thought about offing myself, not because I wanted to die, on the contrary, my life was sweet as fuck back then.
The reason why is because at that time if I were to lose her, I don't think I would want to live in a world without her.
I even thought about doing it in the hospital so my organs could be harvested so that I could save someone's life, so they wouldn't have to go through what I was going through at that time.
Now that she's older, I don't think that losing her would have that impact on me. The reason why I bring this up is that I believe everyone has a tipping point, the main difference is that some unfortunate souls aren't as lucky as I was.
this song was therapy to / for me..... when I heard this I was like YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!!! this is how I feel!