It could be just as true that you don't know beans about how your husband feels about being married to you. Like a lot of married men, he could be very bored with being married and with the woman he's married too. He may wish he could have your income and not you. He could be in it only because he fears the consequences of leaving you. He could be lying to your face every day, telling you how much he loves you, while wishing you'd get hit by a bus. He could be thinking of another woman while you think he's making love to you. It could be, that if he got amnesia tomorrow, he'd wouldn't be attracted to you at all--because yesterday's good memories can sometimes become today's bad obligations. But, you probably wouldn't have dated him if he felt obligated to be with you; but I bet you'd use it to keep him now.
Then again, none of that could be true. All you really know is what he tells you and what you perceive as his true his reactions to what's around him. Because the truth is, as much as many women truly believe that they intuitively know what's going on with their husbands/men, the truth is that married men are the greatest liars on the planet. They're ain't a unmarried man on the planet that can match an married man in deception.
Married men have to be great liars to lie to themselves and keep finding the daily motivations to allow them to live lives completely against their own natures. Lying, just like with any other skill, you get better at it with practice. Married men are also like caged lions. They eat, pace, sleep, occasionally mate, shit, do a few tricks for the lion-tamer, and wait for death. But cruelly, just like caged lions, married men live longer. But does anyone think a lion in a cage, even with greater longevity, is really better off then he would be if he could roam freely without any interference? Hell no!
Strong males (human or animal) do not want to be caged, even if there's pussy in the cage. LOL. As soon as you spring the trap, they'll forget the pussy and focus on how to get the fuck out of the cage. And everyday a male spends with a female mate he becomes less sexually interested in her. Men don't want to be married. We want our own exclusive harems. Give any man the means to do it and that's what he'll do. He'll put together his own private stock of high-end (or the highest he can get) pussy. All without any animus or harm intended to any of his women. Why any woman gets angry about a man "cheating" with another woman is completely insane. No, he was only "cheating" when he was only fucking you--cheating himself from being what he was created to be, a polygamous. Real men are born polygamous and are not at all troubled by it, except for the external penalties society (Western) has placed upon us.
I laugh when people want to talk about "gender" and feeling completely different than what they are made to conform too by society. Tell them muthafuckers to get in line behind married men, because we were the first to experience that shit! LMAO! And, we'll be the last to be able to live our true lives without fear of losing our income, our property, and our children for deigning to be our true selves. Remove those 3 guns pointed at your hubby's head, heart, and balls; first, then let's see how he feels about you and what your marriage has done for him. Perhaps he is just tickled to death to be waking up beside you every day. Or, you could be like Keisha Knight Pulliam and be completely unaware that he wants nothing to do with you. Who knows?
Remove the heavy legal penalties levied upon men in Western society for divorcing their wives, then let's see what happens at your house. (And, while we're at it, let's stop shaming men for not wanting to be married to begin with.) Until then, I'll decline to accept the testimony of individuals (married men) under duress and trust what they say in private when they feel free to speak candidly.
Marriage, especially in the Western context, is archaic and dying because women are now empowered and no longer need the provisions or the protection of a husband, especially Black women. Men never needed marriage, but submitted to it as a means to hoard pussy and out of social obligation. All that is really left today is marriage out of tradition, not as a real means to any logical ends. And its about time society adjusted to this new reality and removed marriage from its traditional perch as the ultimate social relationship--its not and never was; it is the individual relationship to the State which is the ultimate social relationship--it always was. That's why marriage is not mentioned in the U.S. Constitution, but the individual and the State are!
The truth of the individual and State relationship as the most important one is being realized in the Black Community today. Black women are the most employed, educated, and most liberated women on the planet. That would not have happened if the majority of Black women were married instead of being free to operate as single individuals with the State. But for White Supremacy, all Black American adults would be the freest people on the planet because we are disproportionately free from the outdated bonds of marriage.
I think if less Black people got married and Black women did not covet marriage as the ultimate social validation, relationships between Black men and women would be far better. Why? Because we are wrongly using marriage as the standard for heterosexual love--while it is clear that Black women do not really need husbands, they have the State. The high divorce rates for married Blacks prove it.
We, as a community, have to embrace this new reality and stop trying to measure ourselves based upon old models from a nearly dead Black institution. We must develop a new healthy culture built upon our true reality, because majority married Black households aint ever coming back. Continuing to shame each other about it has to stop.
Let Blacks (mainly black women) who fetishize marriage to the point of anger and bitterness toward the opposite sex of the group, find it in non-Black communities and stop seeking new company to share in their misery.
Damn man... You wrote some serious truth here. props.
Now I am going to delete this reply in case my wife is checking my posts. lol
