You damn right men define femininity.We have done so since the dawn of fucking time. We define what we will support AND put our lives on the line to protect. If a man is out one night with a woman and the car breaks down in the middle of nowhere, she looks to you for protection. Strange noise in the home and it sounds like an intruder is downstairs, she looks to you for protection. Traditionally, it's the men who support the family. So damn right men are going to define femininity.
Modern women want to eat the cake and have it too. They want to wear the balls until shit jumps off. Then it's

"Hey, you're the man, do something!" Real men don't put up with such shit. A real man isn't going to put up with these bipolar feminists when there are so many beautiful women willing to play the role of a woman. That's why these bipolar feminists end up fucked and dumped.
Modern bipolar feminist.....

"I'm an independent, strong woman. I don't need a man! I got my own!" Next breath...

"I'm so bored and lonely....why won't anyone woo me...I want to be swept off my feet!"

"I'm going to get my fuck on....if men can do it, I can do it....fuck this shit...."

"I'm ready to settle down, but I don't understand why men treat me like damaged goods!!!"
Women who let feminist ideals define them tend to end up bitter. General terms of course. There are some pie eating women who can give a fuck. Following their lead is fucking up a lot of women's lives.