Black women VS Black men

shanebp1978 said:
Do black women have an underlying hostility, anger, abandonment issues, or resentment towards Black men.

Why are many black women eager to buy into media fueled stereotypes, and character assassination, of black men.

Is it the seemingly cultural Verbiage from the black man, and the readiness with which it is used, bitches, bitch, hoe, hoes . . . that over the years grows resentment?

I remember in a documentary this woman said Hip Hop was like a verbally abusive boyfriend.

Or is it the spread of strong visual objectification of black women and your bodies.

Is it insidious division of the most powerful union on earth, the black man and the black woman.

Just sellout Aunt Tomasina women, or just bitter reaction from scorned individuals who should just figure it out, " He's was/is just not that into you. "

Whatever it is, what can be done to improve it.
Click to expand...

I bought all of it until the bullshit about "most powerful union on earth". Where the fuck did you get THAT bullshit. Powerful union???? Last time I checked, the union between black men and black women was the same as the union between ALL men and ALL women: Fuckers and fuckees. Hunter and prey. Dick and pussy. What's so powerful about that? Your dick gets hard, you lookin' to fuck, that's all there is to it. You can espouse all of that profound shit AFTER you skeet, until then you are like any other son of a bitch on earth YOU WILL SAY OR DO ANYTHING TO GET LAID. C'mon.
 
demere said:
This is true. Also, a lot of black men have momma issues too. I have heard so many negative things said about black women (some positive too) since I've been on BGOL I'm amazed.

Things won't get better until we figure out that we are playing into very principles Willie Lynch wrote about. We are not each others enemy. I have a lot of male friends, and some of them treat me like a sister. I appreciate that, I do my best to look out for them any way I can.

Thats the way it should be between us. We are both caught up in the struggle, Lets help each other out, instead of just trying to get ahead on your own, and put the other down.
Click to expand...

See, what you are saying makes perfect sense to a soft dick. But a hard one? Sister? Fuck that. Now, I have some female friends that are like "sisters" to me only because I don't find them attractive, they don't find ME attractive, or there is some other restriction (like the wife/gf of a good friend, etc; I don't roll like that no matter how hard my dick gets). Tell you what, you can be my sister if I don't find you remotely attractive or you are with a friend, other than that, with every word I am trying to figure out how to get you into handcuffs and shit. Why is this such a big fucking deal? It's fucking DNA.
 
The problem is that Black Men are not in the homes raising there children and leading there women. This creates a new kind of independent Black Woman. Who's views of family and leadership have become misguided. She believs that she does not need a man to be happy and says things like "i'm independent", " Cant no nigga tell me shit" The key to fixing is for the black woman to submit to Black Male leadership. Support her man as opposed to tearing him down, and realize that the nature of man is to lead and never to follow.


Check This Show Out, It's about this topic.


http://acemoney.mypodcast.com/2007/10/EPISODE_14_Tale_of_The_Super_Symp-53467.html
 
THE DRIZZY said:
Yes there is. Your point has great merit. I would even say that it is a form of mind control to program this bullshit to the young public.

However black women must be educated on not enabling these bitchified efemenized mysogynistic over sexed coons. Stay out the club and stop dancing to hoochie songs that objectify you:rolleyes:. As long as black women enable these miscreants shit will continue. Black women need to appreciate and support other genres of music like house, club, disco, funk, afrobeat, reggae, samba, jazz, dusties, and progressive hip hop that is either positive and/or non offensive.
Click to expand...

Damn, now somebody is talking with some fucking sense. Sisters swoon over no account shiftless mysogynistic pretty muthafuckas, and then complain when they ain't shit. You cannot make a silk purse out of a sow's fucking ear, no matter how good that sow looks.

And the daddy issues are serious. I can tell almost immediately whether a woman had a good relationship with her father. But it still goes back to sorry, pretty muthafuckas. Somebody made a girl baby with this useless piece of shit, and now the world is much worse off for it.

Sisters, do me a favor, Just fuck cats with character, okay? And if you can't tell who has character and who doesn't, PM me and tell me about this fucker, and I'll tell you if you should fuck him. Got some news for you. I don't care how good he looks, how much money he makes, or how good he can hit that pussy: IF HE DOESN'T HAVE CHARACTER, HE WILL (NOT MIGHT, WILL) HURT YOU!!! What is character? Well, too long for me to go into here, but I will be glad to explicate it for you at length should you require.

I have it, so you all can fuck me and be safe....:yes:
 
AlexandMorgan said:
Let the buyer beware should not apply to everything in life. Do you choose to buy into bullshit or do u bounce out when u see it.

A lot of people are seduced by the flash and glamor rather the true substance of the person they get involved with. Often times just being honest with yourself or taking the time to analyze the actions of the person you get involved with can save you a lot of stress.

If people would learn to leave the negativity behind and stop holding everyone accountable for the actions of those before them then maybe it would be easier to have decent relationships.

:dunno: Just my $0.02
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Damn... cats kinda steppin up now... finally some good shit here.

I have a lot of education (5 degrees), and I run into a lot of professional women, mostly all full of shit. I'm not bad looking (so I'm told), make really good jack, and am generous to a fault (I get off on spoiling women- not buyin em, just spoiling em). But most of the women in my social circle have this ridiculously superficial idea of a man and are mad when that shit never materializes. They are just not worth my time.

Right now I am seing a women who never even finished HS (I"m helping her get her GED). She took a couple of wrong turns early on, and shit just went downhill from there. But I like her because she is REAL. When she says something she means it (she has no reason to lie to me), and I trust her. She never asks me for anything, but she knows she can get anythign I have (money don't mean shit to me). I want her to get more education, but the most important thing is fucking CHARACTER. Damn what's so complicated about that???
 
The reason why women have so much resentment towards men is because men wont step up and demand respect.

I know its your job as a man to be provider/protector but it goes deeper than that. Women act out because men now are afraid of them. Back in the day you didnt see too many women disrespecting their husbands, now its commended when a woman disrespects her man.

For an example, have you ever seen a kid that is acting out in public? Crying,talking back, yelling/hitting? All that kid is crying out for is discipline. When you dont disicpline your kids it makes them unhappy and miserable in the long run.

This goes the same for females too. I'm not saying smacking them around but dont be a weak ass bitch either. When you say no mean NO and when she still wants to argue just ask her whats for dinner. She may get mad but in the end she'll love you for it.
 
When accepting being chosen by chick, as a man you should first qualify her. If she doesnt have the economic or educational background that is similar to yours, she should not be allowed to choose. It's cool to help someone get there life on track, but they need to bring tangibles to the table. Not to sound conceited. But i'm not getting next to a chick that's not career minded & goal oriented. It's not my job to teach her these thing's.


http://www.acemoney.mypodcast.com/
 
first...

black men need to start raising thier childern...

black women dont have positive male role models in thier life...and sometimes dont know how a man is supposed to treat a woman

black men dont know how to properly act like man

next...

black men and women need to start being honest with themselves...

black women need to realize the things we do to push our brothers away...we also need to realize that its ok to be independent but all that attitude that comes with it is uneccessary...we have to be honest with ourselves and admit that deep down inside we do want a knight in shining armor

more importantly black women need to stop accepting the luke warm bullshit black men give...demand them to be men...demand them to treat u like queens...dont accept him disappearing for days and coming back to stay in your house...or stop finacially/emotionally/physically supporting him if he isnt willing to make a contribution also

black men need to have realistic expectations about women...we arent going to look like video girls....

black men also need to realize black women are passionate...just like they are...so when we get upset instead of complaining about it...they should try to uplift us...just as the black woman has been doing all these years

black men need to understand that although the world might be thier oyster there is a bigger focus here...the priority should be to make sure the community is straight.....take care of home first....then wander

black men need to also start being the MAN...strive to collect assets and have your own first...dont merely setttle for living off a woman...black men need to get thier priorities straight...stop depending on getting a record deal or signing with a team....there needs to be a larger focus on education not ballerism

last...black men and black women need to be honest with eachother...and not fall into the traps created by the media

i honestly think the media does things to intentionally divide us just as they did durring the same times...and we still falling for it:smh:
 
PainInDAss said:
wow, that's really beautiful, I can't wait to have a daughter so I can say that to her. well, say it and actually mean it.
Click to expand...

:) Yeah she'll never forget it and till this day that makes me feel special to remember.
 
Last edited:
Read many of the posts and there's just too many to quote [both positive and negative].

My $0.02;

There are so many generalizations in this thread, it should be easy to see why we can't all get along.

I posted in another thread for a brotha hating on women generally that he should go outside and meet someone [and know that everyone's got a past and a story, get over it].

For the generalization of Black men being unaccountable, take this in;

I knew a brotha totally assed out educationally, financially and socially. We became boys because I was in a similar circumstance -- but could see my train coming down the line. He wouldn't [refused to look, much less consider possibilities of the future]. We became boys on the premise of him working to be able to see his train coming down the line. He never did, which ended our friendship.

However, in his defense, he had in his house [such as it was, way below "living" conditions] his crackhead "in-laws", his girl, his two kids and would take in anyone that needed immediate help. He hustled small game, worked the link card systems and hand outs to keep everyone fed and clothed in his house. Yet, he was the only one working outside of these scams to bring ANY money into the home.

Now, by some posts above, this is truly a worthless brotha. No self respecting black woman he should meet would waste the water it took to spit on him.

But he supported his family everyday in whatever way was necessary to get the job done. How much more stand-up Man can you be?

Now the question comes, is this brotha a loser because of his lack of credentials and earnings or a "Man" because of his standing for this family?

In continuation, should he drop his "loser" girlfriend [who shares his work to support this family] because she has no income or education, or keep his life's partner because she's beside him in every adversity they face?

This is real. This places some context on the opening of the thread, showing just one way [imho] this conversation becomes about CHARACTER FIRST and about so many other things second.
 
DeSiRe said:
first...

black men need to start raising thier childern...

black women dont have positive male role models in thier life...and sometimes dont know how a man is supposed to treat a woman

black men dont know how to properly act like man

next...

black men and women need to start being honest with themselves...

black women need to realize the things we do to push our brothers away...we also need to realize that its ok to be independent but all that attitude that comes with it is uneccessary...we have to be honest with ourselves and admit that deep down inside we do want a knight in shining armor

more importantly black women need to stop accepting the luke warm bullshit black men give...demand them to be men...demand them to treat u like queens...dont accept him disappearing for days and coming back to stay in your house...or stop finacially/emotionally/physically supporting him if he isnt willing to make a contribution also

black men need to have realistic expectations about women...we arent going to look like video girls....

black men also need to realize black women are passionate...just like they are...so when we get upset instead of complaining about it...they should try to uplift us...just as the black woman has been doing all these years

black men need to understand that although the world might be thier oyster there is a bigger focus here...the priority should be to make sure the community is straight.....take care of home first....then wander

black men need to also start being the MAN...strive to collect assets and have your own first...dont merely setttle for living off a woman...black men need to get thier priorities straight...stop depending on getting a record deal or signing with a team....there needs to be a larger focus on education not ballerism

last...black men and black women need to be honest with eachother...and not fall into the traps created by the media

i honestly think the media does things to intentionally divide us just as they did durring the same times...and we still falling for it:smh:
Click to expand...

524.gif
anewpu3.gif
 
Until Black men AND black women stand up and take responsibility for our wrong doings towards one another, share in the blame instead of ALWAYS claiming the victim, finger pointing, stereotyping and blaming outside sources for our problems...

then nothing will ever be done in the advancement of the relations between the black man and the black woman.
 
It Depend On That Black Woman I've Met Alot Of Smart Black Women That Are All For Standing By The Black Man So I Guess It Depends On What Type Of Black Woman You Talking About.
 
My
th_2-cents.gif


alot of black men and women are hardened from life experience in dealing with each other

I personally have alot hostility toward black women that shouldn't be there, but it comes from my personal experience



growing up women seem to want a thug
th_lil-wayne.jpg


In reality there are more black men like
th_a.jpg


Most women won't admit it, but they loved dating the thugs when they were young the unlucky ones got pregnant by them....You all grown up now and want a decent man..Yea it may be difficult for you now..buts its your own fault

I struggled financially for a long time and now when a brother comes into his own in his thirties he notices alot of these same women with 2 and 3 kids, multiple baby daddy's want a man that can provide - Your damaged goods now

Where were you women when I was in college broke or even in my late twenties struggling...

My grandmother and grandfather were broke for 10 years when they started out, but they were broke together
Nowadays Women and Men seem to bail out of bad situation too quickly



I definitely prefer to date sisters, but In my one experience dating a white woman there was significant differences..The White girl definitely made me feel like a man and take control, gave me sex when i wanted it, and supported my dreams.
I think a man needs to feel like a man sometimes, it helps his sensitive ego...
Sisters seem to have daddy issues,so they beat a man down, not all sisters, but the ones I have dated...

Sistas complaining they can't find a good man -I dont get it..
Most of the black men I attend church with, work with, and at my gym, are all professional and single...So this isn't true at all
There are plenty of good men, just not the ones you want..

The professional women I do get lucky enuf to date seem to always tell me about how they had to take care of Tyrone, because he was triflin...
Everytime i turn around all the professional or educated sistas dating a thug or someone they have to take care of...
witneyandbobby.jpg





Fellas we messed up too- We take our women for granted
I hear sistas tell me all the time that white guys are more Romantic..easier to get along with
You need to make your woman feel like woman...compliment her, surprise her with roses and all that crap, don't complain about her cooking..tell her she's a good mother..



I think the last 2 generations of black men and women, went wrong somewhere, we lost communication with each other, and we let the videos and music determine what we look for in a potential mate..

Sistas I still love you
Don't get offended
This is just my personal experience
Alot of black men share the same experience - the proof is on almost all the message boards
 
demere said:
We are not each others enemy. We are both caught up in the struggle, Lets help each other out, instead of just trying to get ahead on your own, and put the other down.
Click to expand...

This sums up how I feel about this whole Black woman/Black man thing ... we're hating on each other more than other races hate on us:smh:Instead of pointing out each others wrongs why not figure out how we can better ourselves and do that ... WE as Black people as a whole will not prosper in life unless we can learn to look past each others differences and focus more on the positives we have to offer each other. Black men and women both have their own faults just like any other race does so let's get over this shit and start building each other up. If you wanna date outside the race do you but don't neglect or put other Black people down in the process.
 
:smh:
We just need to stop pointing fingers and placing blame. Then figure out what our goals are and work on them together. I think that's a good start
 
DaleMabry said:
Did you have good uncles or older brothers or cousins around? That helps.
Click to expand...

I didn't have any other male figures around on a consistent basis, but I did have a very strong mother who raised me the best she could. I don't think I would have asked for it to be any different either. I use to have resentment issues towards men, but as I grew up, I learned I couldn't fault anyone for my fathers short comings, and I couldn't expect any man to fill the void he left in my life. Although society states children need both parents to become successful, productive citizens, I disagree, I am proof. One strong parent can do the job!!!
 
cantcompare said:
I didn't have any other male figures around on a consistent basis, but I did have a very strong mother who raised me the best she could. I don't think I would have asked for it to be any different either. I use to have resentment issues towards men, but as I grew up, I learned I couldn't fault anyone for my fathers short comings, and I couldn't expect any man to fill the void he left in my life. Although society states children need both parents to become successful, productive citizens, I disagree, I am proof. One strong parent can do the job!!!
Click to expand...

You're an exception to the rule. But reality got to set in, how many kids are being raised by single parents who aren't strong?

The healthiest situation for children to be in, is to be raised by both parents who have a healthy relationship.
 
Ace Money said:
The problem is that Black Men are not in the homes raising there children and leading there women. This creates a new kind of independent Black Woman. Who's views of family and leadership have become misguided. She believs that she does not need a man to be happy and says things like "i'm independent", " Cant no nigga tell me shit" The key to fixing is for the black woman to submit to Black Male leadership. Support her man as opposed to tearing him down, and realize that the nature of man is to lead and never to follow.


Check This Show Out, It's about this topic.


http://acemoney.mypodcast.com/2007/10/EPISODE_14_Tale_of_The_Super_Symp-53467.html
Click to expand...

a-men
 
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