INT. SOUTH PARK ELEMENTARY BUS STOP - MORNING
The school bus pulls up, and the gang – STAN, KYLE, KENNY, and, of course, CARTMAN – wait for it. CARTMAN, sporting a LeBron James jersey, appears to be in an unusually bad mood.
CARTMAN (outraged) You guys, why the hell aren't you laughing your asses off about the Warriors losing last night? I mean, come on! It's like, Christmas came early, and you're all just standing there!
STAN (reluctantly) Dude, it's just a game. Chill out.
CARTMAN (angry) Just a game?! Do you realize what happened last night? The Warriors got crushed! I've been waiting for this moment for weeks!
KYLE (disinterested) We don't really care, Cartman. Miami's doing pretty well, though.
CARTMAN (fuming) Miami? Miami?! That's the best you can come up with? LeBron James, my friend! He's the GOAT! You should be worshiping the ground he walks on!
KENNY (muffled) (mumbles)
STAN (smiling) Kenny's right, Cartman. You're taking this a bit too far.
CARTMAN (frustrated) Too far?! You guys were all over me when LeBron had a bad game but what about last night?! Where's the justice in that?
KYLE (sarcastic) Oh, forgive us for not celebrating your favorite player's good night. We're not as obsessed as you.
CARTMAN (determined) Well, get ready to be obsessed, because I've got LeBron James highlights queued up for the next decade, and you're all going to watch them!
INT. SOUTH PARK ELEMENTARY CLASSROOM - LATER
The gang sits at their desks, and CARTMAN continues his LeBron James crusade.
CARTMAN (enthusiastic) I've already created a LeBron fan club on MySpace. You're all invited to join, but only if you promise to praise the King every day!
STAN (sighs) Dude, I don't need a fan club. I just like watching good basketball, no matter who's playing.
KYLE (nods) Exactly. It's not all about one player.
CARTMAN (dismissive) You guys just don't get it. LeBron is the chosen one, the savior of basketball. You'll see.
As the bell rings, the gang heads to their next class, leaving Cartman still obsessing over LeBron James.
FADE OUT.