Let this shit die for about 10 years then reboot with the Generation 1 original look...
Co Sign.
And here is how gullible I was. I thought they would get better.
I thought the first movie was good. It felt a little like Spielberg and I liked the action. There were some cringe worthy parts for sure but with the right writers and some tweaks to the robot designs they could fix it right for the next film. I thought the longer the Autobots stayed on Earth, the more humanoid they would start to look and they would backdoor their way into looking like their Gen 1 selves. Jazz died but... okay, that's okay. He was a black stereotype. Maybe we can get Blaster in the next one. Or Springer. And PLEASE do the transforming sound effects right. It is an internal gear shifting sound. Mix it in with the shifting metal plate sound at the end of the transformation and it will be just right.
Then the writers strike hit.
The second movie was primed to be great. No pun there but the leaked treatment was BRILLIANT. It had Hot Rod vs Bumblebee as rivals. It had Shockwave and his crew looking for Megatron and Starscream taking over the Cons. It had an climax in Vegas. Prime being killed by Megatron. Bumblebee blames Hot Rod for fucking up. A fake out death for Meagan Fox. Starscream was killed by Shockwave. Bumblebee was almost killed. Ultra Magnus came in like a white knight version of Prime and saves the day. Sam cries his heart out. Autobots lose and retreat. Empire Strikes Back ending. or something like that. It was good. Shit I read it here on the board. I had another PDF in my e -mail and I posted it here for others to read. Few people hit me up and asked if I wrote it and leaked it and I was like oh no... sadly, I wish I would've thought of something like that. I would've added in Kup - he always seemed like a Wolverine type to me.
And then Bay and his team dismissed that treatment as a decoy. A joke. Then we got the second movie and in fact, that film was a complete joke. They even brought Prime back to life in the end. Fuck you Jet Fire. Fuck The Fallen too. I'm glad Tony Todd got the work but no... just no. And where is the fucking sound effects Bay? Why are you fucking up even the sound mixing?
Third film comes out and I was like fuck you Michael Bay. I can't. He tried so hard to fix what he did wrong in the first twoa dn it looked amazing and we got Ravage and Shockwave but it was too late. Fuck You Michael Bay. Poor Mr Nimoy. I cant believe you were saddled with this shit. I can't believe you are related to this asshole Bay through marriage. My God. I People forget all about the producer that was arguing with everybody and having fights with all the fans on the Interwebs and we actually had a sparring session on Aint-itCool and he just started to ignore my posts and I was like fuck outta here nigga, fuck your franchise too.
There were people that went at him hard as hell, better than I ever could and he just got madder and madder like a kid like fuck you people. Then he just disappeared. No more grandstanding and defending it. He was rich anyway, I'm not. And then everyone just seemed to forget about him and focus all their anger on Bay and he just took it like fuck it, I know what people want so Ima do what I want.
Then the 4th one came out. Christ. I had to take my kids to see it. I had free passes. I screened it. I couldn't even stay awake, I couldn't even review it. Mykids were like dad please, can we go and we were out. It was horrible. I was like fuck you Marky Mark. After giving us Pain and Gain with Bay and that was a solif fucking effort in filmmaking. It really was. And it was based on a true story and the script was funny too. But even after that hard R shit, both of yall niggas come back to hit us with this. Fuck you Marky Mark.
Then the 5th film... I just cant do it. Even with Frank Welker back as Megatron. I just can't. Quintessa? Unicron what? Prime is what? Bumblebee? Underground railroad and King Arthur and Nazis and OH GOD... WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENEING HERE??!!
I seen a kid try to throw his drink at the screen. Somebody grabbed him up. People were doing hey dude, hey man Marky Mark imitations and laughing.
Its over. Nobody should be going to see these movies. Its not even a guilty pleasure. People are so stupid that they don't even care, the more you keep buying tickets to see this shit, the more they will keep making them.
WOW... that's what I'm talking about! Thank you. I went down memory lane and gotta sick taste in my mouth. This is a palette cleanser for sure.
oNE
and he was voiced by dude who played Bishop in XMen Days Of Future Past
