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How many don't communicate with their parents?

Of all threads to bump...

Yesterday I spent the holiday by myself, by choice. My sister said something Tuesday night that had everyone arguing via text and all my parents said was "Please stop and everyone sleep it off." I wanted them to tell her broke ass to shut up because the holiday wasn't about her. So I told my kids I wasn't going, because I wouldn't be able to front like I wasn't still mad. I cooked like I normally would and actually enjoyed my day alone.

I'm just at the point I can't do all that fakeness. We were supposed to go to Bayou Classic. My kids went, but I got my ass right here in Dallas enjoying myself.
 
cocobeauty said:
Due to some beef trying to be squashed I was led back to this thread...which I forgot about it...but wow!!!!

After reading this, I'm sure some have passed on, but I'm hoping some have made amends. As for me right now...this is the longest I've ever gone without to talking to my sister, and I don't feel bad about....I'm trying to, but it's causing riff between my mom & dad and myself.

I want to reach out to her because I have pneumonia, and I need advice but I refuse....

I just refuse to be there for everyone when I can't get the same, and my pockets aren't that deep anymore. :smh::smh:

Man so much has changed for me since I made this thread.
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cocobeauty said:
Of all threads to bump...

Yesterday I spent the holiday by myself, by choice. My sister said something Tuesday night that had everyone arguing via text and all my parents said was "Please stop and everyone sleep it off." I wanted them to tell her broke ass to shut up because the holiday wasn't about her. So I told my kids I wasn't going, because I wouldn't be able to front like I wasn't still mad. I cooked like I normally would and actually enjoyed my day alone.

I'm just at the point I can't do all that fakeness. We were supposed to go to Bayou Classic. My kids went, but I got my ass right here in Dallas enjoying myself.
Click to expand...

It's this same sister. Oh well.
 
Selfscience said:
This shit is sad as fuck. I'm very thankful and LUCKY that I still have both my parents in my life and they are still together many decades strong.

I hate to hear stories like these in this thread. Life can be a bitch at times and you have to make the best of what you're given.
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We all would like for our parents to have stayed together I think.

Shit even my oldest daughter wished her mom and I did. She said her sis, mom and I were here real family. This was after her mom had two other kids :smh:

Shit hurt me cause it was nothin I could do about it, she cried as she told me. Nigga felt like shit.

Her and I have a strong bond, my youngest is in her dumb teenage stage. Oldest just gets wiser with time.
 
Selfscience said:
This shit is sad as fuck. I'm very thankful and LUCKY that I still have both my parents in my life and they are still together many decades strong.

I hate to hear stories like these in this thread. Life can be a bitch at times and you have to make the best of what you're given.
Click to expand...

yeah same here. My dad texted me last night and said the house wasn't the same without me because I had planned so much fun stuff for us to do. I just apologized and said Happy Thanksgiving. My daughter said my mom barely talked, so I do feel bad, but I didn't want to disrespect their home either arguing with my sister.
 
SamSneed said:
We all would like for our parents to have stayed together I think.

Shit even my oldest daughter wished her mom and I did. She said her sis, mom and I were here real family. This was after her mom had two other kids :smh:

Shit hurt me cause it was nothin I could do about it, she cried as she told me. Nigga felt like shit.

Her and I have a strong bond, my youngest is in her dumb teenage stage. Oldest just gets wiser with time.
Click to expand...

Damn, I know that shit can be rough on a child. Sometimes things just doesn't work out the way we plan and the unfortunate collateral damage are the children.
 
cocobeauty said:
yeah same here. My dad texted me last night and said the house wasn't the same without me because I had planned so much fun stuff for us to do. I just apologized and said Happy Thanksgiving. My daughter said my mom barely talked, so I do feel bad, but I didn't want to disrespect their home either arguing with my sister.
Click to expand...

Yeah, sometimes we have to set our ego aside and it can be difficult to do. We all have our reasons and many times it's frustrating to want to make everyone happy. You just try and make as many of those people as happy as you can.
 
In communication with both. Been bonding more with pops the past decade as he's local & in a better place in his life. Major stress back in the day with his work and battling alcoholism (runs in the fam') and depression. Parents divorced back in '95. Pops has been sober since then & adheres to AA once weekly (sometimes twice). He's helped sponsor people over the years, and introduced AA & NA to many others he knows who needed to face their own addiction issues in order to get their lives straightened out. One of his best traits is communication with friends and family. He regularly calls & emails people to check in. Gotta respect that shit. That's what people need to do more in this life, for real. Simple communication with your circle.

See mom a few times a year. She is several hours away. She keeps in touch more through text & email, and the occasional phone call. Gonna visit her in a few weeks.
 
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cocobeauty said:
Of all threads to bump...

Yesterday I spent the holiday by myself, by choice. My sister said something Tuesday night that had everyone arguing via text and all my parents said was "Please stop and everyone sleep it off." I wanted them to tell her broke ass to shut up because the holiday wasn't about her. So I told my kids I wasn't going, because I wouldn't be able to front like I wasn't still mad. I cooked like I normally would and actually enjoyed my day alone.

I'm just at the point I can't do all that fakeness. We were supposed to go to Bayou Classic. My kids went, but I got my ass right here in Dallas enjoying myself.
Click to expand...

you sound heavy and miserable. Who would want to be around you anyway unless they had to? You did everyone a favor IMO. Not trying to diss but your really sound unpleasant and blame everyone else for your less than ordinary life.
 
RepostKing said:
you sound heavy and miserable. Who would want to be around you anyway unless they had to? You did everyone a favor IMO. Not trying to diss but your really sound unpleasant and blame everyone else for your less than ordinary life.
Click to expand...

I sound like what you are. Kill yourself boo.
 
cocobeauty said:
Of all threads to bump...

Yesterday I spent the holiday by myself, by choice.
...and actually enjoyed my day alone.

I'm just at the point I can't do all that fakeness.
Click to expand...

This is where I am. It's not just the fakeness, it's the unhappiness that comes along with being in their company. I genuinely do not like or care for them; I'm talking about my mama, my only living uncle, & my aunts. My sister I don't talk to, but there is still love there, I just lost a lot of respect for her.
cocobeauty said:
It's this same sister. Oh well.
Click to expand...


cocobeauty said:
, but I didn't want to disrespect their home either arguing with my sister.
Click to expand...

Or disrespect myself. It takes two to argue, so I wouldn'tna been doing that.

I'm at a point where I just let people be who they are :dunno:

And with me knowing who & how these people are .... I'm thew subjecting myself to them & everything that comes with em.
 
Dhustla said:
This is where I am. It's not just the fakeness, it's the unhappiness that comes along with being in their company. I genuinely do not like or care for them; I'm talking about my mama, my only living uncle, & my aunts. My sister I don't talk to, but there is still love there, I just lost a lot of respect for her.


Or disrespect myself. It takes two to argue, so I wouldn'tna been doing that.

I'm at a point where I just let people be who they are :dunno:

And with me knowing who & how these people are .... I'm thew subjecting myself to them & everything that comes with em.
Click to expand...

I completely understand.

Dhustla said:
You shouldn't have responded, but [emoji38] @ boo
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yeah I know.
 
VI786273fu said:
WOW 29 Years
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Weird thing is that, some aunt I never met kept calling my mother asking for me, well she knew me as a baby before I left Haiti.
Anyways I got her number and called her back took her address and went to meet her, little did I know that she lived with my father, so imagine his surprise and mines when I just showed up at his place...This was last December.

We had a good talk and my visit lasted a good 3 hour.

He died this past July.

I got no lessons from this really, still feels strange to me today.
 
I wish my dad was here.

If he was alive to see the warriors win another championship?

He supported them when they weren't shit took me to the games when they weren't shit.. Thanksgiving is when we'd watch football all day and I'd just laugh because of his commentary on the game. He'd have the whole house in tears.

Now I have the whole house in tears and I just take a second and look at that and say damn... I'm just like him but he ain't even here to see it :(
 
You cats that don't will miss the chance when they are gone..

Funny how many threads talk about apathy in our community and how they are fuck ed up but then talk about how they won't fix relationships with family..

I am so very thankful I was able to repair mine before my mother died....it also put things in focus and I was able to accept my oldest daughters advances to repair ours

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk
 
ballscout1 said:
You cats that don't will miss the chance when they are gone..
Click to expand...

I've heard this before and my response is...

I don't/won't miss her (mother) no more than I did as a child. The hard truth is that she wasn't there beyond being physically present, and the time we were together was vacant.

Now that I'm grown and have taken control of my life, I don't miss her, honestly :dunno:
I don't miss the 'never anything positive to say but always can say something negative', I don't miss the 'nothing is ever good enough', I don't miss the constant skepticism of everyone & everything, the pessimism, lack of compassion, lack of regard for others, etc.

Like I said in a prior post, I really feel like an orphan, like I never had a mother.
 
Damian Stone said:
Weird thing is that, some aunt I never met kept calling my mother asking for me, well she knew me as a baby before I left Haiti.
Anyways I got her number and called her back took her address and went to meet her, little did I know that she lived with my father, so imagine his surprise and mines when I just showed up at his place...This was last December.

We had a good talk and my visit lasted a good 3 hour.

He died this past July.

I got no lessons from this really, still feels strange to me today.
Click to expand...
Wow & damn at the same time.
All this happened in 1986? Or since then?

Did you at least get understanding from meeting & talking with him?
Sometimes I find with getting understanding, it doesn't all come at one time. Sometimes the gems from a conversation get revealed during later reflection &/or just time.
 
I knew white folks hated their parents all the time but to see how many black folks don't get alone with their moms is hard to believe

but I wouldn't be surprised if this thread is bumped a few years from now by coco ugly's kids. Imagine living with that bitch? :smh:
 
Shit is kind of hard for me to understand. .. I guess because my family is so tightly knitted...shit man... family reunions are the greatest.. I brought my dad to Atlanta for Thanksgiving so he could see and hold his newly born great granddaughter.
 
VI786273fu said:
WOW 29 Years
Click to expand...

Dhustla said:
Wow & damn at the same time.
All this happened in 1986? Or since then?

Did you at least get understanding from meeting & talking with him?
Sometimes I find with getting understanding, it doesn't all come at one time. Sometimes the gems from a conversation get revealed during later reflection &/or just time.
Click to expand...

I stopped talking to him in 1986, went to his place by mistake in December 2014, thing is I totally forgot he existed consciously of course I knew in the back of my mind.

Well I always understood him really, we just have different point of views but our convos was pretty good, no dramas just adults exchanging.

We caught up to each others lives, his death was pretty sudden and unexpected.
 
largebillsonlyplease said:
I wish my dad was here.



If he was alive to see the warriors win another championship?



He supported them when they weren't shit took me to the games when they weren't shit.. Thanksgiving is when we'd watch football all day and I'd just laugh because of his commentary on the game. He'd have the whole house in tears.



Now I have the whole house in tears and I just take a second and look at that and say damn... I'm just like him but he ain't even here to see it :(
Click to expand...


Great story bro. Sounds like a tightly knit family...the way it's supposed to be and sounds like he's living on through his son. That's a gift.

My mom is bedridden with cancer and neuropathy and my dad has heart issues...just had a treatment on his heart last week. I love both of them line no tomorrow and I know that tomorrow is never promised. I talk to them EVERY DAY. Some of y'all need to listen to 'these three words' by Stevie Wonder.


Sent from my Motorola 2-Way Pager
 
This is a great thread. I'm in my 30s and I still talk to my parents almost daily. And if I don't talk with at least one of them on one day, its almost a guarantee I'll get a call the very next day with one of them saying "How come nobody heard from you yesterday?"

They usually call to talk about nothing but that's fine with me.

My dad is in his 70s now and my mom is in her mid 60s. The older they get, I really cherish each conversation we have and any time I spend with them.
 
Man. Before Mother's Day I hadn't talked to my mother since Christmas I think. I was feeling nice, so on Mother's Day I told my mother sister and brother that I had everything.

Big fucking mistake

It was at that moment...that Godofwine knew....he fucked up

My mother got the biggest appetizer, and biggest bucket of wings they had, of course she only ate like 6. She tried to get another entree and looked crestfallen when I told her no. She looked at my sister with a sad face and my sister said that she had it.

The bill came out to $102.50 for 4 people. Never again

For the Cavs game 7 my sister was coming over and my mother asked to come and I begrudgingly said yes, only because I knew that if I told my mother no my sister wouldn't come. I got half a mind to call her up invite her to lunch and tell her to permanently fuck off. She better hope she never leave me for a fucking thing not a kidney, not a blood transfusion, because I don't love her enough to give something of myself that I might need later to keep her alive

This is unfortunate because back in 86 we saw a UFO together. This is a strange occurrence that both of us can corroborate. I wanted to do a YouTube video, but she doesn't want to. Once she dies I will be the only one with the story
 
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Selfscience said:
Yeah, sometimes we have to set our ego aside and it can be difficult to do. We all have our reasons and many times it's frustrating to want to make everyone happy. You just try and make as many of those people as happy as you can.
Click to expand...
Man what's fucked up now is my youngest has been on her stupid stage of life. I call and text, she don't answer. But when I do see her she's always on that phone. So I said fuck it, you don't wanna answer or reply fine by me. But then I get a call or text only when she need something from me and I give in, next time fuck it I ain't gonna do it.

My oldest just started u of h, she wanted to stay on camp for the first sim. I said cool, it's a good learnin exp. but that after she'd want to live with me. That's when I know her sis will want to come over more. And I ain't cool with the hoe shit. You ain't gonna treat me like some fuckin lame after all I've done for you.

Shit is fuckin depressin
 
SamSneed said:
Man what's fucked up now is my youngest has been on her stupid stage of life. I call and text, she don't answer. But when I do see her she's always on that phone. So I said fuck it, you don't wanna answer or reply fine by me. But then I get a call or text only when she need something from me and I give in, next time fuck it I ain't gonna do it.

My oldest just started u of h, she wanted to stay on camp for the first sim. I said cool, it's a good learnin exp. but that after she'd want to live with me. That's when I know her sis will want to come over more. And I ain't cool with the hoe shit. You ain't gonna treat me like some fuckin lame after all I've done for you.

Shit is fuckin depressin
Click to expand...


Nah it ain't
That's your baby.
She gone be your baby
You ain't gone look at her like nothing but your baby.
So vent here
and then get her what she wants like we all know you're going to do when you log off cause you're a good father.
guide her
be patient with her
she'll come around.
 
Well my dad passed 10 years ago but our relationship ended on a sour note(not even touching this), I literally hate my own mother because she fucked me over so badly back in 2011, I don't even know where to start on that one.:curse::angry:
 
largebillsonlyplease said:
Nah it ain't
That's your baby.
She gone be your baby
You ain't gone look at her like nothing but your baby.
So vent here
and then get her what she wants like we all know you're going to do when you log off cause you're a good father.
guide her
be patient with her
she'll come around.
Click to expand...
Shit hard man, I drop them off and she takes her bags up and doesn't come back to say bye.
 
cocobeauty said:
I just refuse to be there for everyone when I can't get the same, and my pockets aren't that deep anymore. :smh::smh:

Man so much has changed for me since I made this thread.
Click to expand...
:yes: :smh:
"Gotta focus on yourself like an only child/" -Nipsey Hussle

Have to do what's best for self.
 
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