for those of you who don't visit the main board..he is the reply i posted after reading all of the replies over there...oh yeah i encourage you to check out the replies
i believe that she made some good overarching points in terms of love and knowledge of self and evaluating our dynamics in relationships but her generalizations were a bit annoying at times.
i can understand y she says not to support some entertainers but i think she coulda elaborated a lil more about it and name more females.
what was even more interesting was the responses on here such as:
(and i'm paraphrasing)
1) yeah she cool and all but she is not sucking dick and taking face shots so i can't fuck w/ her, she is too prudish for me
-that is a prime example of passing up the 80% for the 20%
2) if she looked like Bahamadia would ppl be feeling her so much
3) if she aint willing to give head and take face shots, another one will
i wonder how many times ppl who said that they would wife someone like her have passed up a chic w/ a like mentality in their lifetime
i wonder how many would actually do it and stay faitful being that some take issue w/ her "prudish" beliefs
when are black men gonna realize that just as we as black women need to check ourselves, so do you
since, a good portion of you have talked about being a black king, then how about:
1) setting and sticking to some standards for yourself; think & act with ur head and not ur dick
2) show a lil discipline and self-control...for men to talk about how irrational and emotional women are, some of them sure seem to be unable to fight thier lustful feelings and be rational in those situations
oh yeah...and STOP COMPLAINING ABOUT WOMEN TRYNA TAKE THE LEADERSHIP ROLE OF MEN! -just as you complain about white feminist beliefs, you are living by the white male equivalent. Think about it. Most of the time when this issue comes up, people reference the "old days" when a man came home from work and the women had the house str8 and food on the table and how it worked fine and women suck now for not accepting that role. What people fail to realize that times have changed. Also, from what I was told by some older black women (some elderly)...even tho they stayed at home, they had a side hustle that either brought in money, produce or something of that nature...they had their own barter system thing going on...lol. So this whole...man come home and slap the check down on the table for women to buy grocceries and so she can cook his dinner and that's it belief is a white man's experience...how many black families you know lived like that.
Also:
A) Some men AREN'T coming home from work because of various reasons (disabled, low job security, automization, competitive markets for white color jobs, discrimination & etc.)
B) The jobs they had back in the day, especially factory jobs paid well and had great benefits due to high unionization rates....that is no longer; people aren't really paid what they are worth, which causes people to take on more jobs which effects the dynamic of their family and even their mind, which brings me to my next point..
C) Some women aren't able to stay home all day to take care of the kids and the house....they have to go to work...the bills have to get paid, the family must be provided for. For those who have men that don't bring home super bank, instead of having him work 9 jobs and never be able to see his family and have to deal w/ him being super tired and stressed, the women decide to help take on the burden (which i think is love)...this also effects her role in the house and the upbringing of the children
ATTENTION BLACK MEN AND WOMEN-stop giving chicken heads play....yall keep them "employed" just like a chic he lets a no good dude beat it; both yall wrong. why would a person want to walk upright if they know that they could be as much as a waste of sperm and egg because they can get by w/ their dicks/pum pum & mouth?
-this is just basic supply and demand economics
oh yeah...and for the dudes that are treating women right...keep doing so and don't try to shy away from doing so in front of ur boys...hopefully it will rub off on them (same goes for the ladies)
WE ALLLLLL know what the other sex does that pisses us off and is negative but have we ever taken the time to not only EVALUATE what have done that has gotten a negative/positive response from them? could some of those negative things be in us? are we helping or hurting the relational situation? After evaluating and acknowledging things we need to improve them...how many of us actually take steps towards improving them?
People talk a good game...the question is...how many people actually live it?
just my two cents!