Women... Money... How much does it matter to you in a relationship

[MCP]

As a old saying goes:

"Love doesn't pay the bills"

 

[Alumni]

Why do you feel like this? Why do you feel that you are entitled to something JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE A WOMAN?

Can you please list me what you believe are the UNIQUE responsibilities of the WOMAN are to the man during the dating process? Please do not say to "look nice" and be "presentable", or shit like that..........because the man is supposed to do that stuff too. I mean what GENDER SPECIFIC responsibilities do you believe the woman has to a man during the dating stage?

I've been asking this same question for years now and I still haven't gotten an answer. Hopefully the ladies of SOL will be able to answer it. I won't be holding my breath though.

 

[DigitalAngel2007]

co-sign...i'm kinda glad I never had a girlfriend...most women these days ain't worth my time and damn sure ain't worth my money...and i'll be 27 on january 31...

....so you're gay right???

 

[Tryan Toburnit]

alot of women feel the man should pay for everything. i have been cursed by some of them like they thought he should pay my round trip taxi and everything and they were like what you mean you bought a round of drinks. these women include my aunties, but my aunties are old school and it was like that then.

honestly, I refer to wives as "private whores" and if a man pays for everything there is a point and time where he is in fact owed something i overstand this and don't wish to owe anyone anything which is why i like to go dutch.

this way everyone knows everyone is there because they want to be and its a level playing field.

Wives are private whores??? WTF??? Who fucked your head??? Thats some of the craziest logic ever...the worst part is that it KINDA SORTA makes sense in that evil scientist type of way. If a dude pays for everything for his wife then she should wanna be supportive and make his life easy. If support means head on demand then whats the big deal? Da ya OVERstand that???

I been diggin on ya for a long time. You say some cool shit 9 outta 10 times but starting to get waaaaaaaaay too damn angry! Go get some new dick and have some orgasms baby! Happy New Year!

 

[thighsneyez22]

I been diggin on ya for a long time. You say some cool shit 9 outta 10 times but starting to get waaaaaaaaay too damn angry! Go get some new dick and have some orgasms baby! Happy New Year!

...so this is how men are propositioning these days...

 

[DiamondDeuce]

No, the point I was trying to make to DDDiva and other women in the thread that think they should be "paid for their time" is that if money matters so much, do they think that trying to date way out of their tax bracket is feasible? And do they think that a cat that makes so much more money than them is actually taking them serious other than to hit?

But that is just the way of the world...A woman's worth is based on her physical appearance and a man's worth is based on his monetary value.

Sad thing is that too many people over value their actual worth.

Xfactor,

You and I are on the same side my friend.
But I do not think the ladies in this thread were saying that they should be paid for their time. I think they are trying to make the point that they would desire a financially secure man........and that love alone does not pay the bills. I have no problems with that.

Now the highlighted part is probably the REALIST thing mentioned in this thread. I think too many women do OVERVALUE themselves as far as what type of man they have the ability to attract. I am in Atlanta and I see far too many young sistas holding out for the type of man that they will probably never get. By the time they realize it aint gonna happen.........they become bitter and resentful...towards other men.

 

[deezchocnuts4ru]

Yo. Damn, this thread has taken on a life of its own..., but this is the bottome line IMHO, women are judged by looks and men are judged by occupation or ability to provide. Bottom line. Shit aint fair, but it is, what it is. As we mature it changes somewhat, but we still have certain physical things we want in a woman, and she wants to be made to feel secure. For women ITS ALL ABOUT FEELING SECURE AND PROTECTED. Peace.

 

[Adam Knows]

Yo. Damn, this thread has taken on a life of its own..., but this is the bottome line IMHO, women are judged by looks and men are judged by occupation or ability to provide. Bottom line. Shit aint fair, but it is, what it is. As we mature it changes somewhat, but we still have certain physical things we want in a woman, and she wants to be made to feel secure. For women ITS ALL ABOUT FEELING SECURE AND PROTECTED. Peace.

i can agree with that.....

 

[SinaminDelite]

As much as some women will say this Miss Femme some men will never believe it. Unfortunate but true.

I am with you right there, it really doesnt make a difference to me how many $$ you have. More to life man.

Very true. I've gotten into pointless discussions about that. Me, money has never been a huge issue to me. The quality of the individual counts more in my book. I'd take a broke dude with a good heart over a white collar man with a nasty attitude toward women any day.

 

[OnSlaught]

Very true. I've gotten into pointless discussions about that. Me, money has never been a huge issue to me. The quality of the individual counts more in my book. I'd take a broke dude with a good heart over a white collar man with a nasty attitude toward women any day.

They still make y'all!? I thought your model was destroyed by the money-hungry, status-chasing, condenscending version...nice to know that y'al still exist

However, I'm not for being broke. I just don't understand why the all mighty dollar determines the potential of a relationship. If a man has a good heart and his head on straight, chances are he's headed in the right direction to make dough. Just 'cause he works in the bank right now doesn't mean he won't own it a few yrs down the line (only an analogy). I think as long as the brotha is ambitious, you got a winner. He'll eventually get where he's going...

 

[DLateshow]

"I think as long as the brotha is ambitious, you got a winner. He'll eventually get where he's going..."

Thats real talk right there. I find that to many women want to show up on the scene after the hard work has been done. It's that women that helped that man get there that I have mad respect for. To many women don't want to be there for the struggle but come in droves when the jackpot has been hit. I do have one simple question to ask the ladies on this board. Would you date and marry a man that makes the same amount of money as you do.

Dlateshow

 

[HoneyDip]

I dont care if you got all the money in the world... MONEY CAN'T BUY MY LOVE!!!!

 

[OnSlaught]

"I think as long as the brotha is ambitious, you got a winner. He'll eventually get where he's going..."

Thats real talk right there. I find that to many women want to show up on the scene after the hard work has been done. It's that women that helped that man get there that I have mad respect for. To many women don't want to be there for the struggle but come in droves when the jackpot has been hit. I do have one simple question to ask the ladies on this board. Would you date and marry a man that makes the same amount of money as you do.

Dlateshow

Thanks DLate, but what's highlighted in bold is REAL TALK!!

 

[Adam Knows]

I find that too many women want to show up on the scene after the hard work has been done. It's that women that helped that man get there that I have mad respect for. To many women don't want to be there for the struggle but come in droves when the jackpot has been hit.

i chose not to have anyone with me during 'the struggle'. The last thing i wanted to hear from someone was 'i was there with you when you did' to try to claim any credit....

that would've gotten messy....

and then a few women that came in after the fact thought they were just going to be running shit...

 

[Izayoi]

i chose not to have anyone with me during 'the struggle'. The last thing i wanted to hear from someone was 'i was there with you when you did' to try to claim any credit....

that would've gotten messy....

and then a few women that came in after the fact thought they were just going to be running shit...

Hmm. That's interesting Don, so where does that leave you in terms of evaluating a potential mate's sincerity (before you were married)? I'm curious

...and in my experience to struggle with someone is not with the intention to take credit when success hits.

When I decided to start my own business (at the time full time) I was short, my ex covered me till I could turn things around. When he was in grad school, and I was working I covered him. Not ever once has he or I have ever thrown that in each other's faces like we did something extraordinary.I always thought that's what people who love each other do to support one another

 

[Adam Knows]

Hmm. That's interesting Don, so where does that leave you in terms of evaluating a potential mate's sincerity (before you were married)? I'm curious

...and in my experience to struggle with someone is not with the intention to take credit when success hits.

When I decided to start my own business (at the time full time) I was short, my ex covered me till I could turn things around. When he was in grad school, and I was working I covered him. Not ever once has he or I have ever thrown that in each other's faces like we did something extraordinary.I always thought that's what people who love each other do to support one another

i'm 300% all about doing it on my own when it comes to things such as that. funny thing is it was a movie that put that in my head..."waiting to exhale" i never want to be dependent from anyone when it comes to achieving my personal goals...nor do i feel just because you were "dating" me doesn't means your obligated to what "I" gain from my work.

unfortunately some (not all) women believe because "they were there" means they're entitled to a piece of the action when your relationship ends... plus in Ohio women can file for support and you don't have to be married with them.....

as far as determining a potential mates sincerity, it goes to more then just their "financial worth", to me it's more about financial responsibility more then anything else regarding that subject....shit, i'd still be lonely if i only wanted someone who made equal or more, so i said someone who at least makes 40k and has good credit...that was my only criteria as far as finances portion went.....

 

[Izayoi]

i'm 300% all about doing it on my own when it comes to things such as that. funny thing is it was a movie that put that in my head..."waiting to exhale" i never want to be dependent from anyone when it comes to achieving my personal goals...nor do i feel just because you were "dating" me doesn't means your obligated to what "I" gain from my work.

unfortunately some (not all) women believe because "they were there" means they're entitled to a piece of the action when your relationship ends... plus in Ohio women can file for support and you don't have to be married with them.....

I can respect that DaDon. Is Ohio a common law state? I can see where that might be problematic.

as far as determining a potential mates sincerity, it goes to more then just their "financial worth", to me it's more about financial responsibility more then anything else regarding that subject.

C/S.

Thanks for the reply.

 

[Adam Knows]

yeah, ohio is a common law state so that means on the 179th day...gtfo, lol

and my mistake for not adding this earlier...a prenuptial agreement. my wife signed one.

the previous woman i was marrying refused to sign one....

 

[Cleopatra_J]

As much as some women will say this Miss Femme some men will never believe it. Unfortunate but true.

I am with you right there, it really doesnt make a difference to me how many $$ you have. More to life man.

Preach on!!!

No woman who is about her business is going to mess with a man who fits this description. But the specific income amount really doesn't matter to most women if a man is living within his means and living well. If a man is so poor that he doesn't know where his next meal will come from, he is a charity case, not someone I would date

Even truer... I'm not trying to live paycheck to paycheck and neither should you!!!


I don't know anyone personally who seeks a guy out for money, there are a lot of arrogant and annoying dudes who got money and I don't want shit to do with them.

No, I won't date a bum or broke negro... But in a relationship you go through hard times. Sometimes he helps you, you help him. I was in a relationship where he did help me financially, car broke, he helped out... He paid most of the time, i leave the tips. He pays for movie tickets, I get the popcorn and soda. It's a team. Not everyone on every team contributes equally. But you know your team is there for backup when you need them. When he fell on hard times, I OFFERED to help him and he knew I was sincere with mine. And I think that's what happens in a strong relationship.

 

[DarkCity]

No, I won't date a bum or broke negro... But in a relationship you go through hard times. Sometimes he helps you, you help him. I was in a relationship where he did help me financially, car broke, he helped out... He paid most of the time, i leave the tips. He pays for movie tickets, I get the popcorn and soda. It's a team. Not everyone on every team contributes equally. But you know your team is there for backup when you need them. When he fell on hard times, I OFFERED to help him and he knew I was sincere with mine. And I think that's what happens in a strong relationship.

I think you still owe me $2.50 muthafucka

I mean what GENDER SPECIFIC responsibilities do you believe the woman has to a man during the dating stage? And a man to a woman

^^^^I want to see some of the women weigh in on this.

 

[SinaminDelite]

No, I won't date a bum or broke negro... But in a relationship you go through hard times. Sometimes he helps you, you help him. I was in a relationship where he did help me financially, car broke, he helped out... He paid most of the time, i leave the tips. He pays for movie tickets, I get the popcorn and soda. It's a team. Not everyone on every team contributes equally. But you know your team is there for backup when you need them. When he fell on hard times, I OFFERED to help him and he knew I was sincere with mine. And I think that's what happens in a strong relationship.

C/S. Things like that should happen in a strong relationship, but it doesn't happen all too often.

 

[lilsexii]

Mo money, mo plastic it seems. Some guys with money aren't that into regular down to earth girls...won't trust them cuz they think they're after the money, then they get with a professional gold digger instead Anywho...

A dual income could be a beautiful thing. Less than I make is fine as long as they work hard for theirs. Ambition is a sexy quality when its tempered with humility. Ideally, I'd like to know that when we combine our efforts, we would be financially secure. Enough to be debt free and to cover all bills with some left over to play with and some growing on the side. If the kids want something reasonably priced and we say no, I want it to be because we decided they shouldn't have it, not cuz we couldn't afford it. In a family emergency, we should be able to buy a plane ticket at the drop of a dime or take care of home/car repairs without blinking, take a real vacations, etc.

A couple more old saying:
Don't jump onto a sinking ship
I can do bad by myself

 

[xfactor]

Guys with money aren't that into regular down to earth girls...won't trust them cuz they think they're after the money, then they get with a professional gold digger instead

Statements that could not be any further from the truth.

 

[Cleopatra_J]

I think you still owe me $2.50 muthafucka

What you talking bout Willis??

 

[lilsexii]

Statements that could not be any further from the truth.

I should have re-read it before I posted - meant to say SOME guys with money. My bad...editing now...