Why does the father shoulder all of the blame when the daughter turns out bad?

[Black A. Camus]

The newest phrase seems to be that the man failed as a father when the daughter doesn't turn out right, e.g., if the daughter grows up to be a prostitute or a porn star. Why isn't the mother to blame when a daughter turns out bad? Usually the mother has more influence on a daughter once the daughter begins puberty.

Once the daughter becomes a teenager the mother typically has the final say if something the daughter is doing is questionable. The dad is deemed as prude and out of touch and gets ignored, especially when it comes to things of a sexual nature--such as the way a girl dresses or who she hangs out with or dates. If the father disagrees usually the mother and daughter conspire behind his back and do what he objects against surreptitiously. There's really not much a father can do if he disagrees with the daughter once the mother conspires with her.

Given all this, why does the father fail as a dad if his daughter turns out bad?

 

[kain]

As a father, I feel my role is to instill self respect, pride, and self disciple in my child.

 

[Black A. Camus]

Sure. That's what you're supposed to do. But if you know in your heart that you did everything you could to instill those values in her but she chose not to listen does that really mean you failed as a father? You'll never have absolute control over her.

It's a hard truth but she's going to be who she's going to be and there's only so much you can do about it. There will come a point when she'll make her own decisions, whether you like them or not. Despite all you tried to do, if she makes bad decisions does that really mean you failed as a father?

 

[kain]

JMO, if that child makes that choice that is frowned upon, it is perceived to be a failure to instill those values. The perception exists but it doesn't make it true as you have stated. The father still takes it on the chin.

 

[JD Walker]

The newest phrase seems to be that the man failed as a father when the daughter doesn't turn out right, e.g., if the daughter grows up to be a prostitute or a porn star. Why isn't the mother to blame when a daughter turns out bad? Usually the mother has more influence on a daughter once the daughter begins puberty.

Once the daughter becomes a teenager the mother typically has the final say if something the daughter is doing is questionable. The dad is deemed as prude and out of touch and gets ignored, especially when it comes to things of a sexual nature--such as the way a girl dresses or who she hangs out with or dates. If the father disagrees usually the mother and daughter conspire behind his back and do what he objects against surreptitiously. There's really not much a father can do if he disagrees with the daughter once the mother conspires with her.

Given all this, why does the father fail as a dad if his daughter turns out bad?

USUALLY in a TRADITIONAL household the father is the strict disciplinarian. Women are soft. They will only check a brat to a point until they get emotional. Men are the ones who are supposed to keep a boot planted in the little hooker's ass until she gets some get right.

 

[Black A. Camus]

USUALLY in a TRADITIONAL household the father is the strict disciplinarian. Women are soft. They will only check a brat to a point until they get emotional. Men are the ones who are supposed to keep a boot planted in the little hooker's ass until she gets some get right.

The traditional household model you described no longer exists because of the law, and because woman aren't that weak. If the mother doesn't agree with the father's rules regarding the discipline of the daughter and chooses to ignore them there's nothing the father can do. When you consider how skewed the laws are in favor of woman when it comes to such things as domestic violence, and custody, and the high divorce rate that likely results from those laws, the father is basically powerless to intervene if the mother decides to go rogue parent.

 

[Deuterion]

The newest phrase seems to be that the man failed as a father when the daughter doesn't turn out right, e.g., if the daughter grows up to be a prostitute or a porn star. Why isn't the mother to blame when a daughter turns out bad? Usually the mother has more influence on a daughter once the daughter begins puberty.

Once the daughter becomes a teenager the mother typically has the final say if something the daughter is doing is questionable. The dad is deemed as prude and out of touch and gets ignored, especially when it comes to things of a sexual nature--such as the way a girl dresses or who she hangs out with or dates. If the father disagrees usually the mother and daughter conspire behind his back and do what he objects against surreptitiously. There's really not much a father can do if he disagrees with the daughter once the mother conspires with her.

Given all this, why does the father fail as a dad if his daughter turns out bad?

When a boy sees Women as nothing but jumpoffs it's usually because his mom was one.

When a girl sees Men as nothing but jumpoffs it is probably because her dad treated her mom like one.

 

[Blunt]

Because he's never there???

Why don't fathers get the blame for the way their SONS turn out? Who's responsible for the the way criminal-minded rappers like Tupac, Biggie and Snoop turned out?? No one, apparently.

 

[Black A. Camus]

Because he's never there???

Why don't fathers get the blame for the way their SONS turn out? Who's responsible for the the way criminal-minded rappers like Tupac, Biggie and Snoop turned out?? No one, apparently.

This thread/question does not involve race. Enough fathers are there. This question deserves more than just a stereotypical reply--with little thought given. As far as Snoop and Tupac go, that's off topic. The subject of this thread concerned being labeled a failed father because a daughter turned out bad, despite everything the father tried to do, not relationships between fathers and sons.

 

[Daddy43205]

i bla,e the both of them but there are special cases when the parents do right and the child still a fuck up.

 

[bigred22]

Father is suppose to be the leader of a family. Leaders shoulder blame, that is what comes with leadership.

 

[Rick Ronson]

Look around you

The shit females let their kids get away with now is ridiculous

 

[Front side flip]

u got this idea from the fishburne case. nobody knows and gives a fuck who her mom is .

 

[samh32]

Father is suppose to be the leader of a family. Leaders shoulder blame, that is what comes with leadership.

Verbatim!!!

 

[Black A. Camus]

Father is suppose to be the leader of a family. Leaders shoulder blame, that is what comes with leadership.

The law doesn't suppose that the father is the leader of the family. He can't legally force his wife to do anything. If the woman doesn't agree with him and decides to do otherwise he can't do anything about it. It is really rational for him to shoulder the blame under those circumstances?

 

[bigred22]

The law doesn't suppose that the father is the leader of the family. He can't legally force his wife to do anything. If the woman doesn't agree with him and decides to do otherwise he can't do anything about it. It is really rational for him to shoulder the blame under those circumstances?

If you can't control your house, somewhere you made the wrong decisions, which means you failed as a leader.

 

[Non-StopJFK2TAB]

If you can't control your house, somewhere you made the wrong decisions, which means you failed as a leader.

Look at things in their respected context. Sometimes you just have bad seeds. And besides this is the USA, and things are entirely different here when compared to other nations.

 

[samh32]

The law doesn't suppose that the father is the leader of the family. He can't legally force his wife to do anything. If the woman doesn't agree with him and decides to do otherwise he can't do anything about it. It is really rational for him to shoulder the blame under those circumstances?

It doesn't take a law for me to realize I'm ultimately responsible for the success and failures of my family. Even if my wife doesn't agree with all my decisions, it doesn't take away the fact that I'm the head of our household. We all have roles and responsibilities, and my daughter looks for me to provide that much needed guidance required to be a productive part of this society. If she fails, I'm still going to sleep at night, because I provided every opportunity for her to succeed.

 

[bigred22]

Look at things in their respected context. Sometimes you just have bad seeds. And besides this is the USA, and things are entirely different here when compared to other nations.

There is an exception to every rule, I hear you. But if you live right in-front of your family, be a man, choose the right wife who has your back 100%, and TEACH your fam the right things, there is less likelihood of your kids turning out like bums and your whole family being in fucked up chaos. That's a fact. We all fuck up, we all make mistakes, but some fuck up more than others, and no one likes to accept the fact you gotta pay for them mistakes one way or another, and if them mistakes are bad enough, your kids gonna pay for them too. That's just a fucked up reality of life. Fuck right, wrong and fair, it's just life man.

 

[Black A. Camus]

If you can't control your house, somewhere you made the wrong decisions, which means you failed as a leader.

You can't control your house once a woman lives with you because you can't control her. Woman have equal rights. If, or when, you two cease to jointly control your home all you can control is when you quit her. Then pray that you can afford alimony and child support.

 

[bigred22]

You can't control your house once a woman lives with you because you can't control her. Woman have equal rights. If, or when, you two cease to jointly control your home all you can control is when you quit her. Then pray that you can afford alimony and child support.

That's what I'm saying though fam, If you choose a Woman who don't have respect for you as being the man of the family then shit man you fucked up. If you fuck'n with a Woman who you can't say shit too, then man you fucked up.

 

[Sampson]

So for example, if a child grows up with just her mother and she turns out bad, it's due to the father's absence. But if she does well, all credit to the mother. Yeah, that makes perfect sense.

 

[LuckyHungWellington]

Simply put: Women want credit for everything positive and will not accept blame for anything negative or derogatory. And we've lost our ballz to make it any other way.

 

[woodchuck]

For the same reason the mother gets all of the credit when the child, male or female, turns out good.

 

[woodchuck]

Simply put: Women want credit for everything positive and will not accept blame for anything negative or derogatory. And we've lost our ballz to make it any other way.

I call it the vaginization of the American man. It's deep on our side, too. Listen to any black station when they start talking that male/female shit, and without fail, Rudolph the Brown Nose Reindeer will call up and put ALL of the blame on us, and he will be followed by a shitload of cosigners, including the black male host. If anyone tries to call the woman on anything, they will be given the bum's rush. Shit, it's gotten so bad, that black radio hosts are wishing a Happy Father's Day to single mothers. If you ask about doing the same for a single dad on Mother's Day, they'll say, "He's supposed to do that!", well isn't she as well?

 

[JD Walker]

The traditional household model you described no longer exists because of the law, and because woman aren't that weak.

Of course they are. I can make a human stain out of a woman in no seconds flat. I think current society makes you forget that as a man, you are on top of the food chain.

 

[DjMorpheus]

All I know is more failed father's equal more porn hoes.

I'm all for more porn hoes

 

[woodchuck]

All I know is more failed father's equal more porn hoes.

I'm all for more porn hoes

 

[Zeferino]

The fact that Chippy D has those horrible spots on her ass confirms that Fishburne was a bad father and was the cause of her recent career choice. Any caring father would have rubbed clearasil or some kind of medicine on her butt to get the spots off. Those outrageous ass spots prove she wasn't taken care of as a child.

 

[Flawless]

When a boy sees Women as nothing but jumpoffs it's usually because his mom was one.

When a girl sees Men as nothing but jumpoffs it is probably because her dad treated her mom like one.

this is bullshit, your mother could could be mother superior and it wouldn't stop anyone guy from fucking around with hoes

 

[BizzyB]

I like this post simply because it imposes a question that only a parent that is completely honest with ones self can answer, I have 4 children 3 girls and 1 boy and I can tell you it really is up to the child you can preach teach scold discipline all you want to children will do what they want even if they have to sneak to do it. As a father your role is to guide and lead by example but what happens when your child doesn't like your teachings well they go astray. I will give two examples then i will let it go. 1- we all heard the saying that I work hard so that my children can have what i didn't well the other end of that is well my father is always working he doesn't have time for me. 2-Another one is you are a strong man Disciplinarian and all that then kids complain about not being able to do this or that Most of the time its not about the parenting its about the child's perception of what you did and why you did it. So Be easy on your father know that he loves you and he has your best interest at heart. Because at the end of the day children will ultimately do what they think is right or justified based on those feelings

 

[4 Dimensional]

I call it the vaginization of the American man. It's deep on our side, too. Listen to any black station when they start talking that male/female shit, and without fail, Rudolph the Brown Nose Reindeer will call up and put ALL of the blame on us, and he will be followed by a shitload of cosigners, including the black male host. If anyone tries to call the woman on anything, they will be given the bum's rush. Shit, it's gotten so bad, that black radio hosts are wishing a Happy Father's Day to single mothers. If you ask about doing the same for a single dad on Mother's Day, they'll say, "He's supposed to do that!", well isn't she as well?

so true. Like Chris Rock said "All we get is the big piece of chicken" and we don't even get that anymore. Women need that mental boost and support. They need encouragement, compliments, and acknowledgement for them to function with a stable mentality. As a man of my house I could give a fuck about a compliment or mental support because I know what I am suppose to do. Its called responsibility and I take great pride in it.

 

[Mr. Met]

Chippy's hooker friend stressed that she never mentioned or talked about her mother.

Could make the case that the mother is more at fault.

 

[Lions]

A mother is the nurturer that ensures that her children grow.

A father is the socializing force that ensures his children know how to act right.

You can ALWAYS tell when someone didn't have a father in their life based on their behavior. A lot of men don't want to believe this because when their kid fucks up it's easy to blame someone else, but it is what it is. If you daughter's a whore it's because the father didn't instill the right values. Blame the mother, blame tv, blame their friends. It doesn't matter. Once those values are instilled, if done correctly, nothing else is going corrupt her. They call them "Daddy's Girls" for a reason.

 

[ScorpDiesel]

A mother's nature is to nurture.
A father's nature is to teach.