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VOTE! - BGOL Writing Contest #5: Revenge/Payback Story

VOTE! - BGOL Writing Contest #5: Revenge/Payback Short Story Contest

  • 3 Days

    Votes: 1 6.7%

  • Best Served Cold

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • End of a Nightmare

    Votes: 5 33.3%

  • I Still Love Her

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Life is Cheap, Death is Expensive

    Votes: 2 13.3%

  • Mindy's Men

    Votes: 4 26.7%

  • Mwendani, the Palace Guard

    Votes: 3 20.0%
  • Total voters
    15
  • Poll closed .
godofwine

godofwine

Supreme Porn Poster - Ret
BGOL Investor
Alright, we had seven entries in the Revenge/Payback Writing Contest. Read them all and vote on which one you like. I am going to have the voting open for 13 days to give folks a chance to read each story

Theme: Revenge - Give us your best revenge/payback story.

Length: 3000 words max.

The Entries Are:

First Prize:
write_gold.gif
End of a Nightmare - godofwine
Second Prize:
write_silver.gif
Mindy's Men - Dannyblueyes
Third Prize:
write_bronze.gif
Mwendani, the Palace Guard - ouruko


3 Days - Damian Stone
http://67.18.219.83/image_hosting/web_pages/godofwine77/BGOL_Revenge/3_days.pdf

or

http://freetexthost.com/jw6onp6g60

Best Served Cold - Winslow Wong
http://67.18.219.83/image_hosting/web_pages/godofwine77/BGOL_Revenge/Best_Served_Cold.pdf

or

http://freetexthost.com/i6hc02oqjc

End of a Nightmare - godofwine
http://67.18.219.83/image_hosting/web_pages/godofwine77/BGOL_Revenge/End_of_a_Nightmare.pdf

or

http://freetexthost.com/omoxpaxgsf

I Still Love Her - largebillsonlyplease
http://67.18.219.83/image_hosting/web_pages/godofwine77/BGOL_Revenge/Istillloveher.pdf

or

http://freetexthost.com/fkpwjtsrmv

Life is Cheap, Death is Expensive - Mello Mello
http://67.18.219.83/image_hosting/w...enge/Life_Is_Cheap_and_Death_Is_Expensive.pdf

Mindy's Men - Dannyblueyes
http://67.18.219.83/image_hosting/web_pages/godofwine77/BGOL_Revenge/Mindys_Men.pdf

or

http://freetexthost.com/ektajnddx1

Mwendani, the Palace Guard - ouruko
http://67.18.219.83/image_hosting/web_pages/godofwine77/BGOL_Revenge/Mwendani_the_Palace_Guard.pdf

or

http://freetexthost.com/ey4qh1b1ks



The fam put a lot of work in to this. Take some time, give props, vote.
 
Last edited:
nice. cool thread. im a writer and I have a story that would is the ultimate revege story. wont drop till july though
 
godofwine said:
What is the topic or basis of your story?
Click to expand...

man's wife is killed by criminal he's trying to capture. doesnt care about red tape and the law afterwards.

way deeper but will discuss more during editing phase. its going to be about 500 pages long
 
Two more to read before I vote. Finishing up "Best Served Cold" now.

Too bad we can't vote on more than one.
 
I swear I read Best Served Cold before. :lol: I remember that joint I think it was in the last writing contest or on the BGOL fuck stories board. :yes:
 
I have to give props to all the contestants who got to make their entries within the alloted timeframe. (and extended period)

I also have to apologize to Godofwine for not getting my entry in at all.

Hopefully, I will do better next time.

Peace.:(
 
Mr MajestiK said:
I have to give props to all the contestants who got to make their entries within the alloted timeframe. (and extended period)

I also have to apologize to Godofwine for not getting my entry in at all.

Hopefully, I will do better next time.

Peace.:(
Click to expand...

It's alright, slick. I know people are busy, even extending the period two more weeks. I did mine at work while sitting at a cubicle pretending to do my work. So I had the time to catch an idea at any time and inject it into my story. I also had the benefit of a poem i used as motivation for this story. Though only 20 lines, it was the driving force of the story. THe idea. It's like when I write songs, you give me an idea and I will run with it from here to the moon. That is why I told people who could not find an idea to watch the news. Take a story from the news where the characters are already in place and create a backstory.

a. See a fire on the news and think arson. Someone burned your family home and you know who it was and plan to get them.
b. Your sister was killed in a gang battle, though she was not involved. Kill members of both gangs.
c. Your brother was killed in prison 2 months before his release. Get locked up to kill his killers.

That first domino is what gets a good story started. You gotta find that first domino to make them all fall.
 
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Lets get a bump. I messaged a mod to get the sticky back until the voting ends. thanks
 
Will read them all then return in a frew days with a vote.


But before I glean a single word . . . I salute all the contestants. Doing SOMETHING and COMPLETING it are different animals. Props to you for doing BOTH.


JG
 
Props to these brothas... just skimmed a couple and most def will read all of these vote sometime this weekend.
 
John_Gault said:
Will read them all then return in a frew days with a vote.


But before I glean a single word . . . I salute all the contestants. Doing SOMETHING and COMPLETING it are different animals. Props to you for doing BOTH.


JG
Click to expand...

soja said:
Props to these brothas... just skimmed a couple and most def will read all of these vote sometime this weekend.
Click to expand...

oskie said:
nice works
Click to expand...

All of the contestants thank you and appreciate you for taking the time. There are some good works here. Voting ends on Tuesday.
 
:lol: Wow...

Turned out better than I expected. :yes:

Will there be commentary where the writers can hear feedback/criticism from the readers on what they liked or didn't like?
 
Mello Mello said:
:lol: Wow...

Turned out better than I expected. :yes:

Will there be commentary where the writers can hear feedback/criticism from the readers on what they liked or didn't like?
Click to expand...

Yes, the commentary will be held right here. Since the voting has ended you can say what you want about which ever story you want. What you like, what you didn't. Whatever.
 
I think what makes end of a nightmare so effective is that it captivates you within the first 3 paragraphs. Once you hear a story start by a woman dragging a man's unconscious body to a stolen car it really doesn't matter what happens next. She could spend 2000 words quoting him tax law and you'd still finish the tale. I'm definitely going to apply this to my next story.

I think spacing has a lot to do with it too. There's a reason why our English teachers pushed paragraph structure so hard on us. Not using the proper form is tiring on the eyes, especially if you read the stories on your android phone like I did.

The hardest thing about writing contests is being able to compete with free movies, you tube , 5000+ satellite channels, and other great media that requires very little skill or imagination to consume.
 
Dannyblueyes said:
I think what makes end of a nightmare so effective is that it captivates you within the first 3 paragraphs. Once you hear a story start by a woman dragging a man's unconscious body to a stolen car it really doesn't matter what happens next. She could spend 2000 words quoting him tax law and you'd still finish the tale. I'm definitely going to apply this to my next story.
Click to expand...

Thank you for the props

I am very proud of this story and all of the positive feedback I received from friends, coworkers, and strangers alike. Revenge stories, to me, are the most fun because it is something that everyone can relate to.

One of the little easter eggs I use is to name the characters after people in Black history:

Horace Tanner, named for Horace Pippin and Henry Ossawa Tanner, famous Black painters

Zora Walker, named for Zora Neale Hurston, anthropologist, and author & Madam CJ Walker, noted for innovations with hair products.

Zora's mother Mae Walker named for Mae Jemison: astronaut, physician
 
All the stories were good. I was thoroughly entertained by reading all the stories. End of A Nightmare and Mindy's Men were two really good ones. In Mindy's the whole time I was thinking dude wasn't going to take it that far and risk losing his son but he did with the support of his po. At the end it left me thinking if Mindy's men could go beyond those two characters since she is a po. How many other excons could/has she set-up to do her dirty work. It felt like it could be a tv series.

I knew End of A Nightmare was GOW. :lol: I like how she took all that time to plan the revenge down to getting herself in shape. End of A Nightmare was some cold shit I like how that revenge plot was administered with cruel prejudice. Nothing but thorough gritty revenge.

I'm surprised I Still Love Her recieved no votes. It wasn't your typical revenge but it was some fucked up shit regardless. That mofo gonna end up with everybody that knew his wife on that zombie farm with them. Have a whole nation of zombie mother fuckers. :lol:

Best Served Cold I always enjoy reading that story I knew I read it before on here in the Fuck Stories section. That's one story that has always stuck with me.

Mwendani, the Palace Guard man not what I expected but I liked the visuals I was seeing when I read that story. The setting the character. Fucked up how it ended for him though. Reading that I can't help but feel there are some more stories from that character, or at least I'd like to read some.

I know my shit was way too long and is "to be continued" so I'm not even mad if you colin poweled my shit. :lol: I initially was keeping within the bounds of the word limit until a larger story just hit me and I had to flesh it all out in my head. Writing got kinda sloppy trying to rush but... Before I knew it I was cutting back pages splicing shit. There are still other chapters to the story but it's still not finished yet. If ya'll want to read it I will post it up.

In all great job, I think everyone did well. It's always cool to see other writing talent and to flex those skills. I enjoyed this contest. Great job everyone.

:cool:
 

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