Spousal abuse - when the MAN is abused

[geechiedan]

There is no air time given to shed light on MEN in abusive relationships.

Be it physical or mental. I heard on a radio show talking about juanita bynum and how it was hard for her to admit being in an abusive relationship. Imagine if it were the other way around (and it can be) how much harder it is for a man to admit to being in an abusive relationship...

Has anyone ever dealt with a man in that situation or saw it?

 

[KINGFROMQUEENS]

i have a cousin that would let his wife beat on him for years. i mean she did shit that landed him in the hospital. i used to try to get him to have her locked up , but he was always like nah the kids , i cant do it. i was always afraid he was gonna kill her one day , cause he is a big dude and everyone has a breaking point. he finally got a divorce.

 

[mc2]

I wouldn't take any kind of abuse from a woman. As a "good black man" I can always find another black female if the one i'm with starts acting crazy.

 

[Lady-Wiz]

i have a cousin that would let his wife beat on him for years. i mean she did shit that landed him in the hospital. i used to try to get him to have her locked up , but he was always like nah the kids , i cant do it. i was always afraid he was gonna kill her one day , cause he is a big dude and everyone has a breaking point. he finally got a divorce.

damn

 

[Izayoi]

i have a cousin that would let his wife beat on him for years. i mean she did shit that landed him in the hospital. i used to try to get him to have her locked up , but he was always like nah the kids , i cant do it. i was always afraid he was gonna kill her one day , cause he is a big dude and everyone has a breaking point. he finally got a divorce.

I know someone also. He's a nice looking guy, seems sweet BUT he allows himself to be abused and the woman emotionally abuses his son from a previous relationship.

 

[HoneyDip]

i'm not even gonna front... i used to fuck this one dude up really bad. i felt bad but he used to start the shit. i'm not down for a dude hittin me unless we play fighting. this nigga used to raise his hand to me all the time and i used to defend myself everytime. i pulled knives on him and all. i even himmed him up in public once while he was out with some chick. like i said i felt bad but hey...

 

[geechiedan]

i'm not even gonna front... i used to fuck this one dude up really bad. i felt bad but he used to start the shit. i'm not down for a dude hittin me unless we play fighting. this nigga used to raise his hand to me all the time and i used to defend myself everytime. i pulled knives on him and all. i even himmed him up in public once while he was out with some chick. like i said i felt bad but hey...

thats not an abusive relationship..thats you two fighting like hell and BOTH bringing drama...

 

[femmenoire]

I think violence is stupid anyway.

In a relationship it's worse, I don't care if you're male or female.

 

[KINGFROMQUEENS]

i'm not even gonna front... i used to fuck this one dude up really bad. i felt bad but he used to start the shit. i'm not down for a dude hittin me unless we play fighting. this nigga used to raise his hand to me all the time and i used to defend myself everytime. i pulled knives on him and all. i even himmed him up in public once while he was out with some chick. like i said i felt bad but hey...

that aint the same homey. he was hitting you. we talking about the woman just doing all the violent things.

 

[femmenoire]

Well why would a man allow for the behavior to continue?

 

[ladyscorpio]

Well why would a man allow for the behavior to continue?

Perhaps for the same reasons as women do Femme, they have had to deal with it their whole lives therefore believe that it is the norm which leads to low self esteem and the inability to take control.
Or they get into the mentality as women do she loves me she doesn't mean to do it. Continually enabling the behaviour.
Just my perception.





Peace

 

[Mo-Better]

Well why would a man allow for the behavior to continue?

Good question, a real man would not! It would only happen with me one time. If a woman is foolish enough to raise her hand to me our relationship is over. I've never raised my hand to a woman (I had good reason to) and I never will. Except in self defense. If I have to "go there" then it's over. No woman is worth my spending a single night in jail over.

Then there's mental abuse. I don't know which is worse physical or the mental. Neither has its place in my world. There's going to be problems but there's ways to workout problems without getting physical or trying to belittle your mate.

 

[femmenoire]

Good question, a real man would not! It would only happen with me one time. If a woman is foolish enough to raise her hand to me our relationship is over. I've never raised my hand to a woman (I had good reason to) and I never will. Except in self defense. If I have to "go there" then it's over. No woman is worth my spending a single night in jail over.

Then there's mental abuse. I don't know which is worse physical or the mental. Neither has its place in my world. There's going to be problems but there's ways to workout problems without getting physical or trying to belittle your mate.

I think mental abuse is worse to be honest. Been there and done that a long time ago.