Those little rat dogs get on my motherfucking nerves. All of those little rat dogs. I don't understand why people get dogs.
I know cats have attitudes or whatever the fuck, but cats are like teenagers. There are four rules to cats. Four simple fucking rules:
1: Feed me
2: Play with me - BUT ONLY WHEN I FEEL LIKE BEING BOTHERED WITH YOUR ASS
3: Clean up behind me
4: LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE
Tell me that dogs aren't like having a toddler all over again. Tell me that. Everybody I know who has a dog, it's like having a toddler all over again. The dog can't entertain itself, the dog can't even go to the bathroom without your ass
People I know who have cats, they can go on a weekend vacation as long as they leave enough food and water and change the litter before they go, they can enjoy their weekend without their cat.
Dogs...WHY? Why do people love those needy motherfuckers so much?
Man, I was walking up the steps and kept hearing this creaking and crunching sound. It was happening on every other stair, so I walked back down and walked back up and heard it on every other step, but this time the alternate stairs. After 10 minutes of this, I ask my lady to walk up the steps and she doesn't hear it. Now I'm some paranoid asshole, so I head back up the steps while she's listening, and she yells out, "that's your fucking old ass knee making that sound." My right knee is so messed up from sports, and falling down the steps and tearing my patella tendon in the process, but I swore it was my old steps making that sound.
Fuck outta here. Simon can't afford that car and is trying to get some insurance money. Mechanic shops are all gruff old white dudes, dominican dudes, or old black men with hands that look like baseball mitts. None of those people are going to allow someone to just walk into the service area.