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Question for the parents on the board who strongly believe in academics.

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55th View

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My best friend and his wife were called in for a meeting w/ the assistant principal yesterday, who is over academics and discipline. Their daughter's mid-year diagnostic came back and it was determined that she's still reading on a 3rd grade level. If that doesn't improve by March, she may not be promoted to 9th grade next year.

I told them to remove her TV (she watches it for hours after school) and to take her off the dance team. He's in agreement, but the mom was a dancer throughout her school years and said she can stay on the team, but she's going to force her to listen to audiobooks to and from school everyday.

How would you handle this situation if you were the dad?
 
3rd grade reading level in the 8th grade? Damn, how is she functioning out here? The dad if he is int he house is going to have to sit down and supervise her reading "Cat In the Hat" type of books for at least an hour everyday, minimum. I feel bad because I know she is shitting bricks when out loud reading comes up in class.
 
Boardgames like hangman help grow their vocabulary.. Make her try to use words that she hardly uses in the game to try to win but tell her she must use them in a sentence properly and must know the definition.. Bernstein bear books work wonders.. I taught a lot of kids how to read , write, learn math growing up.. Use board games like monopoly to teach them about math and money.. Candy land to learn their colors.. Hangman to learn new words and to start using the dictionary as a cheatcode.. I had a built in library in my crib from childhood that my mom created for me, than I passed some of those books to the youth.. Find out what subjects she likes to find books in that realm to make reading more fun to her.. Than make her give you summaries of each story after she finish.. Knew a few kids who were behind in reading level that me and my moms helped get on their grade level and even advance it.. As my mom use to tell the kids as confidence booster its like a race its not how you start but how you finish, you can have a slow start but that doesn't mean you still can't win the race.. The smiles that would bring kids was priceless and once they started excelling they were so happy and my moms would say I knew you was gonna win the race you just needed the right coach
 
Does the child go to a public or private school? Kids don’t usually get held back for just their reading levels.

It’s actually common today for kids to have much lower reading levels than their current grade. First-year students in college also suffer from poor reading, comprehension, and writing abilities coming in. You’d be surprised.

But if a child is on that reading level in the 8th grade, that’s definitely a reflection on the parents. Extracurricular activities are ok, but the parents are going to have to be more active in their child’s reading. That’s something that should have been addressed years ago, and should have been caught by them.

And as others have already mentioned, read some fuckin books. Goddamn, 2025 and mofos still will not reading with their kids.
 
Have her tested for dyslexia, if that comes back negative then test for adhd
you would amazed how many go undiagnosed because they don't exhibit the "popular" / well known symptoms

Also google "reading camp for 8th grade" - there are inperson and online programs, check them out
 
I would handle the situation by staying out of their business. However, I agree with everything you said. In my later years, I’ve learned that the most crucial thing a child needs to learn, even before they can do math, is to learn how to read and write. The earlier you start, the more their brain can develop, even just by reading comic books. It helps them improve their vocabulary and expand their minds.
 
As a parent you must engage and interact with your children. Her parents need to read to her and with her. Turn on the closed caption on the TV. Audio books won't help her learn how to read unless she can read the words off a screen simultaneously. Teach her how to use a dictionary. Taking her out of dancing is not something I would do. However, TV time would be limited to an hour a day and an hour for social media concurrently. They are not our friends. They are our progeny.
 
tallblacknyc said:
Boardgames like hangman help grow their vocabulary.. Make her try to use words that she hardly uses in the game to try to win but tell her she must use them in a sentence properly and must know the definition.. Bernstein bear books work wonders.. I taught a lot of kids how to read , write, learn math growing up.. Use board games like monopoly to teach them about math and money.. Candy land to learn their colors.. Hangman to learn new words and to start using the dictionary as a cheatcode.. I had a built in library in my crib from childhood that my mom created for me, than I passed some of those books to the youth.. Find out what subjects she likes to find books in that realm to make reading more fun to her.. Than make her give you summaries of each story after she finish.. Knew a few kids who were behind in reading level that me and my moms helped get on their grade level and even advance it.. As my mom use to tell the kids as confidence booster its like a race its not how you start but how you finish, you can have a slow start but that doesn't mean you still can't win the race.. The smiles that would bring kids was priceless and once they started excelling they were so happy and my moms would say I knew you was gonna win the race you just needed the right coach
Click to expand...

Yeah, but we talking about an 8th grader. She might be insecure about reading at this point. They going to have to check her confidence level.

Your suggestions are good and offer several ways to address her fundamental problems. But this is on her parents not actively reading with their child.

My wife and I read with my daughter just about every night until she started reading by herself. But we didnt stop just because she got into middle school.
 
4 Dimensional said:
Does the child go to a public or private school? Kids don’t usually get held back for just their reading levels.

It’s actually common today for kids to have much lower reading levels than their current grade. First-year students in college also suffer from poor reading, comprehension, and writing abilities coming in. You’d be surprised.

But if a child is on that reading level in the 8th grade, that’s definitely a reflection on the parents. Extracurricular activities are ok, but the parents are going to have to be more active in their child’s reading. That’s something that should have been addressed years ago, and should have been caught by them.

And as others have already mentioned, read some fuckin books. Goddamn, 2025 and mofos still will not reading with their kids.
Click to expand...
One of the worst things they ever did was get rid of the pizza hut reading program where you would read like 10 books a month or something and you would get a free personal pan pizza at the end of the month. A lot of people need an incentive to read...

Also one thing to note OP... @tallblacknyc gives great advice. also get a newspaper. NOthing like the wall street journal but something like USA today and have them read it...those papers are written on a 6th grade level so hopefully she will be able to read it.

Reading things like the weekly reader (maaann...i'm going WAY back to 80s and 90s, lol) will help bring up her reading level.
 
ViCiouS said:
Have her tested for dyslexia, if that comes back negative then test for adhd
you would amazed how many go undiagnosed because they don't exhibit the "popular" / well known symptoms

Also google "reading camp for 8th grade" - there are inperson and online programs, check them out
Click to expand...

You raise good point, but again that’s something that should have been caught early if they were active in her reading earlier.

it’s better they get a handle on this now. The could thing is that’s it never too late to learn or improve your reading. But if she had a real learning problem, then they’ll have to invest to identify the issue.
 
4 Dimensional said:
Does the child go to a public or private school? Kids don’t usually get held back for just their reading levels.

It’s actually common today for kids to have much lower reading levels than their current grade. First-year students in college also suffer from poor reading, comprehension, and writing abilities coming in. You’d be surprised.

But if a child is on that reading level in the 8th grade, that’s definitely a reflection on the parents. Extracurricular activities are ok, but the parents are going to have to be more active in their child’s reading. That’s something that should have been addressed years ago, and should have been caught by them.

And as others have already mentioned, read some fuckin books. Goddamn, 2025 and mofos still will not reading with their kids.
Click to expand...
for various reasons some kids just don't test well

oh - yeah @55th View - one more thing
ask how they are determining her reading level - if its solely based on standardized test (screening)
search for someplace that gives Diagnostic Assessments of Reading like DORA or Informal Reading Inventory (IRI),
 
BlackGoku said:
One of the worst things they ever did was get rid of the pizza hut reading program where you would read like 10 books a month or something and you would get a free personal pan pizza at the end of the month. A lot of people need an incentive to read...

Also one thing to note OP... @tallblacknyc gives great advice. also get a newspaper. NOthing like the wall street journal but something like USA today and have them read it...those papers are written on a 6th grade level so hopefully she will be able to read it.

Reading things like the weekly reader (maaann...i'm going WAY back to 80s and 90s, lol) will help bring up her reading level.
Click to expand...

It’s a different world in education. I’m thinking about my daughter’s journey and much of it was our involvement in developing her fundamentals.

These kids today write, read, and speak in social media or text lingo.

Now with AI, we’ll never truly know how well a student can write. Reading and writing go hand in hand. AI harms one of those things severely.
 
ViCiouS said:
for various reasons some kids just don't test well

oh - yeah @55th View - one more thing
ask how they are determining her reading level - if its solely based on standardized test (screening)
search for someplace that gives Diagnostic Assessments of Reading like DORA or Informal Reading Inventory (IRI),
Click to expand...

True, but reading levels can be diagnosed on the spot. Bring out different levels of books and see.

It’s true that some kids don’t test well, and if they are basing her levels on quantitative score, then it may not be a fair assessment for her.
 
4 Dimensional said:
Yeah, but we talking about an 8th grader. She might be insecure about reading at this point. They going to have to check her confidence level.

Your suggestions are good and offer several ways to address her fundamental problems. But this is on her parents not actively reading with their child.

My wife and I read with my daughter just about every night until she started reading by herself. But we didnt stop just because she got into middle school.
Click to expand...
Over double digit amount of kids have been taught by me and my moms for free.. Kids from all type of upbringings.. From an immigrant that literally didn't speak to a foster kid who use to get bullied by his other foster bros and sis cause he couldn't read at a first grade level in junior high.. Insecurities and all we took them in and changed their abilities literally using these methods.. Its how my mom taught me at an early age its how we taught many kids for decades.. Its why so many people wished me and my mom started our own tutoring program / daycare center.. Lot of those kids are literally into finances now, I'm talking accountants, working in the financial district, to owning their own biz, to tech, etc.. Literally call them my young boys and they been calling me their og forever.. They will always introduce people to me as such from females they fucking to friends, people they do bizz with, they literally be like this was our inspiration in many ways.. So I'm saying through unconventional methods that have been used since the 80s it works.. 1 of my boys kid( his son) was diagnosed as autistic cause he had a speech problem.. I said tell them idiots to go fuck themselves I know that kid is smart he was just born around covid and unfortunately couldn't be around kids to which he would communicate with more to better have him talking more.. Well during covid took him under my wing.. He went from being shy to being more comfortable around people, eventually started talking more and now he's the best student in his class.. Talks clear as shit and helps other students in his class.. My boy loves me for saying fuck what those idiots think I know he not what they claiming and proving them wrong
 
4 Dimensional said:
You raise good point, but again that’s something that should have been caught early if they were active in her reading earlier.

it’s better they get a handle on this now. The could thing is that’s it never too late to learn or improve your reading. But if she had a real learning problem, then they’ll have to invest to identify the issue.
Click to expand...
This. My grandparents raised me and they probably had an 8th grade education. I graduated H.S. in 86' I never knew I was dyslexic until my JUCO professor talked to me. She was a beautiful sister who made me determine to overcome it.
 
BlackGoku said:
One of the worst things they ever did was get rid of the pizza hut reading program where you would read like 10 books a month or something and you would get a free personal pan pizza at the end of the month. A lot of people need an incentive to read...

Also one thing to note OP... @tallblacknyc gives great advice. also get a newspaper. NOthing like the wall street journal but something like USA today and have them read it...those papers are written on a 6th grade level so hopefully she will be able to read it.

Reading things like the weekly reader (maaann...i'm going WAY back to 80s and 90s, lol) will help bring up her reading level.
Click to expand...
I was gonna say the Sunday comics but wasn't sure they even make them anymore.. I would get the paper on Sundays and let the kids read it.. They use to love those goofy jokes and stuff
 
BlackGoku said:
One other thing that might help also is reading comic strips. or graphic novels. I used to read Garfield all the time and that was kinda like my "fun read"
Click to expand...
Like I said books that are fun are great ways to get people to read.. Than books with messages are definitely great reads

My fave book till this day is " 2 ways to count to 10" .. Its many messages in that book.. Being the underdog , not being one dimensional, and how being unorthodox or using unorthodox /unconventional methods can still bring you success., it also dealt with math my fave subject. Book would go over most people head but my moms knew what she was doing when she got me that book at an early age and had me read it, cause it represented me as an individual
 
tallblacknyc said:
Over double digit amount of kids have been taught by me and my moms for free.. Kids from all type of upbringings.. From an immigrant that literally didn't speak to a foster kid who use to get bullied by his other foster bros and sis cause he couldn't read at a first grade level in junior high.. Insecurities and all we took them in and changed their abilities literally using these methods.. Its how my mom taught me at an early age its how we taught many kids for decades.. Its why so many people wished me and my mom started our own tutoring program / daycare center.. Lot of those kids are literally into finances now, I'm talking accountants, working in the financial district, to owning their own biz, to tech, etc.. Literally call them my young boys and they been calling me their og forever.. They will always introduce people to me as such from females they fucking to friends, people they do bizz with, they literally be like this was our inspiration in many ways.. So I'm saying through unconventional methods that have been used since the 80s it works.. 1 of my boys kid( his son) was diagnosed as autistic cause he had a speech problem.. I said tell them idiots to go fuck themselves I know that kid is smart he was just born around covid and unfortunately couldn't be around kids to which he would communicate with more to better have him talking more.. Well during covid took him under my wing.. He went from being shy to being more comfortable around people, eventually started talking more and now he's the best student in his class.. Talks clear as shit and helps other students in his class.. My boy loves me for saying fuck what those idiots think I know he not what they claiming and proving them wrong
Click to expand...

Gamification in teaching is very much used in schools today. They are not unconventional methods. Also, focused learning, tutoring, and smaller classrooms are all proven tactics that help children learn. You're a reinforcement of what works. However, you also put the time in, what's the parents' excuse?
 
Z MONSTER said:
This. My grandparents raised me and they probably had an 8th grade education. I graduated H.S. in 86' I never knew I was dyslexic until my JUCO professor talked to me. She was a beautiful sister who made me determine to overcome it.
Click to expand...

That's way too common today. Education, especially public education, is in the habit of pushing on and dismissing potential learning disabilities. It costs money to hire a specialist, and public schools aren't spending that kind of money anymore. They are putting more of the responsibility on the parents. We also know that parents may have learning or resource issues. It's challenging to address multiple problems at once.

How did your professor notice your dyslexia?
 
4 Dimensional said:
Gamification in teaching is very much used in schools today. They are not unconventional methods. Also, focused learning, tutoring, and smaller classrooms are all proven tactics that help children learn. You're a reinforcement of what works. However, you also put the time in, what's the parents' excuse?
Click to expand...
I don't know anything about the parents.. I just know a question was asked about what would you do or basically asking what could help the young girl out to get better.. I offered some suggestions that I have used in my personal life that I know have worked.. Will this info get passed on who knows just answering a question that it seems someone was really concerned about
 
3rd grade level in 8th grade is child abuse in 2025.

1. Change schools.
2. Sue the district.
3. Hire a full time tutor or one parent may need to home teach if they want that child to have ANY CHANCE at competing in this new world.
4. Each parent should take turns slapping the shit out of each other till they are tired :lol:
5. Back to constructive criticism. Turn the TV off for good. Same goes for the parents. Turn off the phones, same goes for the parents.
6. They have to read with her, and she will have to stay in books of interest. She needs to see her parents engaged in learning, even when the are tired.
7. They need to spend way more time on academic developmental activities.
8. Dance is cool, but you need to be able to read a contract and a bank statement.
9. Get her tested for all learning disabilities and consider getting a full blood panel and brain scan, as there could be some unidentified hormonal, vascular or grey matter issues.
 
One of the main reasons many kids don't get held back today is that society doesn't have anywhere to put them without creating a program that requires funding. They would rather push them along and get them out than invest.

Grade school is about assignment completion. It is difficult to assess a child's progress when the school administration wants you to hit unrealistic numbers, even though the students have learning gaps. This is where we see a reduction in information retention. Meaning, they can remember anything they have learned.

Now, AI is commonly used in the classroom. The student isn't even reading the assignments. They copy and paste the text, give the AI a prompt, and get an answer. In math, they have an app that lets them take a picture of the problem and get an answer. In other subjects, they use AI as well.

This reduces critical thinking, reading comprehension, writing abilities, and basic mathematical arithmetic.

Kids hardly bring any homework home. Everything is done in the classroom, and assignments are extended until the very last minute.

There are so many things schools don't do anymore, and parental involvement is more crucial than ever.
 
As others said, if she doesn't have a reading disability, then the parents have to find what interests her and get her to read that way.

Cold turkey cutting off things, will make her rebel.

Have to give her reading activities then reward her with allowing her to watch TV for a limited time, maybe 1-2 hrs a day AFTER she does her reading tasks and have her watch shows if possible with subtitles if she does watch the TV. My daughter used to "listen" to TV while she was on her phone browsing social media.

The parents really dropped the ball a long time ago by not being more involved with her homework, if any and just generally checking what she did daily in school.

I remember when I was young, aside from my schoolwork, my mom used to give me workbooks after school and I had to do like 2-4 pages daily. Answers were in the back of rhe book and she used to staple those pages.

Another hard hurdle is I'm sure her close friends are just like her. I would try to keep her involved in other activities or friends that would be a better influence to her.

But the goal is to really find what interests her. She may be interested in reading in those areas of those subjects to learn.

The pressure of a deadline, meaning next March, they should not stress that to her. Will only put more pressure on her adding more anxiety.

This is a tough one but her peers are a great influence and probably biggest setback.
 
there's no point in cutting stuff she do off. reading at that level in the 8th grade isn't her fault. her parents missed the boat when she was a baby ...now they just gonna have to find something that will pique her reading interests and start from there. she must go to a private school cause its surprising they trying to keep her back as most kids nowadays can't read for shit. hell i read the majority of all americans reading level is like 5th grade.
 
First they need not listen to you. It's not a problem you can punish away. It just as much their fault. Turning the closed caption on is a great idea. She needs to be tested. Then find out what works for her.
 
55th View said:
My best friend and his wife were called in for a meeting w/ the assistant principal yesterday, who is over academics and discipline. Their daughter's mid-year diagnostic came back and it was determined that she's still reading on a 3rd grade level. If that doesn't improve by March, she may not be promoted to 9th grade next year.

I told them to remove her TV (she watches it for hours after school) and to take her off the dance team. He's in agreement, but the mom was a dancer throughout her school years and said she can stay on the team, but she's going to force her to listen to audiobooks to and from school everyday.

How would you handle this situation if you were the dad?
Click to expand...

I wouldn't take her off the dance team. There are too many benefits from being on a dance team. I would remove the TV and make her read every single day. Audiobooks are a stupid idea. She needs to read read read every day.
 
55th View said:
My best friend and his wife were called in for a meeting w/ the assistant principal yesterday, who is over academics and discipline. Their daughter's mid-year diagnostic came back and it was determined that she's still reading on a 3rd grade level. If that doesn't improve by March, she may not be promoted to 9th grade next year.

I told them to remove her TV (she watches it for hours after school) and to take her off the dance team. He's in agreement, but the mom was a dancer throughout her school years and said she can stay on the team, but she's going to force her to listen to audiobooks to and from school everyday.

How would you handle this situation if you were the dad?
Click to expand...
So why do you feel it necessary to punish the child. Is it her fault that she didn't learn to read or is it your best friends fault that he didn't teaching her to read profeciently? She went from the 3rd grade to the 8th grade struggling with her reading and it took someone outside of the house to let them know that...damn shame. Just hire a tutor and get the child caught up. Just sayin'
 

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