NYC hands out 10,000 dildos today from hot dog carts
(NEWSER) – Be careful while approaching vendor carts on the streets of New York City tomorrow and the next day—you may find yourself in line not for a hot dog, but for a vibrator. Trojan is handing out 10,000 Tri-Phoria and Pulse sex toys from “Pleasure Carts” that will move around the city, as part of its continuing attempt to erase the stigma associated with vibrators. “What we’re doing is taking something like a hot dog cart that is so everyday and so mainstream, and we’re showing people that vibrators are mainstream,” an exec tells the New York Times. The company has also been doing quite a bit of advertising, including in prime time, and its products are now carried in such stores as CVS and Walmart. Sales are way up already. Pleasure carts should be easy to spot, what with phrases like “Getcha vibes here!” on the side, but if you must know exactly where they are, check Trojan’s Facebook page. Trojan, hilariously, calls the giveaway “the largest-ever vibrator giveaway of its kind” in the press release. Smirks Gothamist, “Even bigger than the great Allied vibrator air drop over France during World War II?!”
Ah New York City. Land of carts and trucks where you can get just about anything. Clothes? Check. Artwork? Check. Fruit? Check. Hot dogs, falafel, roasted nuts? Check, check and check. And now you can get your butt plugs and vagina vibrating dildos from a cart on the corner. Lemme get a Rabbit with KY and a G Spot wand with Astroglide! And a pretzel with mustard.
Only concern you’ve gotta have here is that shit you get from carts never end up being as good as you expect. You ever get “Nuts 4 Nuts?” Those things smell so fucking good. Like honey roasted deliciousness. Its like every time you pass by a roasted nuts cart the stench of hot subway air, urine, and melting asphalt dissipates and you get a whiff of this scrumptious scent. Then you buy a little bag of them and they taste like peanuts that you found underneath your couch. Just a terrible let down. Same thing with those falafel carts. You’re shitfaced and you see these guys pushing around a massive pile of chicken and vegetables squirting tons of sauce on it chopping everything up with some sort of spatula-blade thing. Smells like a goddam feast fit for a king. Then you take one bite and you instantaneously shit yourself.
So ladies, beware. I’m not sure what the Trojan Carts are handing out. I’m sure it sounds like some shit with 200 horses under the hood that makes that kitty fucking purr. But don’t be surprised if you got some shit that looks much better than it performs.
I guess as long as you don’t shit yourself its better than the falafel carts though.
(NEWSER) – Be careful while approaching vendor carts on the streets of New York City tomorrow and the next day—you may find yourself in line not for a hot dog, but for a vibrator. Trojan is handing out 10,000 Tri-Phoria and Pulse sex toys from “Pleasure Carts” that will move around the city, as part of its continuing attempt to erase the stigma associated with vibrators. “What we’re doing is taking something like a hot dog cart that is so everyday and so mainstream, and we’re showing people that vibrators are mainstream,” an exec tells the New York Times. The company has also been doing quite a bit of advertising, including in prime time, and its products are now carried in such stores as CVS and Walmart. Sales are way up already. Pleasure carts should be easy to spot, what with phrases like “Getcha vibes here!” on the side, but if you must know exactly where they are, check Trojan’s Facebook page. Trojan, hilariously, calls the giveaway “the largest-ever vibrator giveaway of its kind” in the press release. Smirks Gothamist, “Even bigger than the great Allied vibrator air drop over France during World War II?!”
Ah New York City. Land of carts and trucks where you can get just about anything. Clothes? Check. Artwork? Check. Fruit? Check. Hot dogs, falafel, roasted nuts? Check, check and check. And now you can get your butt plugs and vagina vibrating dildos from a cart on the corner. Lemme get a Rabbit with KY and a G Spot wand with Astroglide! And a pretzel with mustard.
Only concern you’ve gotta have here is that shit you get from carts never end up being as good as you expect. You ever get “Nuts 4 Nuts?” Those things smell so fucking good. Like honey roasted deliciousness. Its like every time you pass by a roasted nuts cart the stench of hot subway air, urine, and melting asphalt dissipates and you get a whiff of this scrumptious scent. Then you buy a little bag of them and they taste like peanuts that you found underneath your couch. Just a terrible let down. Same thing with those falafel carts. You’re shitfaced and you see these guys pushing around a massive pile of chicken and vegetables squirting tons of sauce on it chopping everything up with some sort of spatula-blade thing. Smells like a goddam feast fit for a king. Then you take one bite and you instantaneously shit yourself.
So ladies, beware. I’m not sure what the Trojan Carts are handing out. I’m sure it sounds like some shit with 200 horses under the hood that makes that kitty fucking purr. But don’t be surprised if you got some shit that looks much better than it performs.
I guess as long as you don’t shit yourself its better than the falafel carts though.
The Africans gonna be selling them with umbrellas soon.
