My (35m) Wife (32f) was Raped I am Trying to be Supportive but she asks a lot
"My wife was raped last month. I was out of town for business and she went out with some girls from work to a bar after work to blow of steam she said. I was a bit upset because she never called or told me she was going out, but I also dont want to be a controlling as*hole. I was also upset because we have two children and they were both left with a baby sitter so she had ample time to tell me. Well she apparently got drunk, although she thinks something was put in her drink and two guys brought her to a car in a parking lot and took turns while she was blacked out in the back seat of the car. She doesnt remember much of it at all, but says it lasted a long time. I could tell by what the baby sitter charged she got home around 5 am. She says they left her in the parking lot and drove off. She already got tested and is going to get tested again today. She told me right when I got back from the business trip. She was a mess. Crying. It hurt to see her that way. She had some marks on her body and could barely get the words out.
I obviously want to kill these two guys. I am trying to be supportive of my wife and be there for her. I love her and she is the mother of my children. However, yesterday she told me one of the guys texted her. I had no idea she gave them her number and she told me she had just met them that night. She told me they were talking before she blacked out, but I didnt know he had her number. She says she is an emotional wreck and it would help her if she understood what they were going thinking and why they did what they did and what all happened that night. She now is saying she wants to meet them. She doesnt want me to come because she feels my anger might hurt the situation. She says she is going to meet them both tonight at a Starbucks. What do I do. I want to go, or I want to stop her from going, but I also dont want to damage her recovery. I asked ehr to go to the police. Begged her. We live in a small town though and she said that she didnt want our kids to know anything. The two men are not from our town. She went into the city to go to the bar.
Update: I am not great at using Reddit. I never thought I would be asking advice on here. I am not sure this is how you update something. I have been working all day and just got home. I asked her not to go, but she said I wasn't being supportive and said she felt it was something she had to do. I got home and she isn't back yet. I have tried to call her, but she hasnt answered. My heart is in my stomach I really do not know what to do."
"My wife was raped last month. I was out of town for business and she went out with some girls from work to a bar after work to blow of steam she said. I was a bit upset because she never called or told me she was going out, but I also dont want to be a controlling as*hole. I was also upset because we have two children and they were both left with a baby sitter so she had ample time to tell me. Well she apparently got drunk, although she thinks something was put in her drink and two guys brought her to a car in a parking lot and took turns while she was blacked out in the back seat of the car. She doesnt remember much of it at all, but says it lasted a long time. I could tell by what the baby sitter charged she got home around 5 am. She says they left her in the parking lot and drove off. She already got tested and is going to get tested again today. She told me right when I got back from the business trip. She was a mess. Crying. It hurt to see her that way. She had some marks on her body and could barely get the words out.
I obviously want to kill these two guys. I am trying to be supportive of my wife and be there for her. I love her and she is the mother of my children. However, yesterday she told me one of the guys texted her. I had no idea she gave them her number and she told me she had just met them that night. She told me they were talking before she blacked out, but I didnt know he had her number. She says she is an emotional wreck and it would help her if she understood what they were going thinking and why they did what they did and what all happened that night. She now is saying she wants to meet them. She doesnt want me to come because she feels my anger might hurt the situation. She says she is going to meet them both tonight at a Starbucks. What do I do. I want to go, or I want to stop her from going, but I also dont want to damage her recovery. I asked ehr to go to the police. Begged her. We live in a small town though and she said that she didnt want our kids to know anything. The two men are not from our town. She went into the city to go to the bar.
Update: I am not great at using Reddit. I never thought I would be asking advice on here. I am not sure this is how you update something. I have been working all day and just got home. I asked her not to go, but she said I wasn't being supportive and said she felt it was something she had to do. I got home and she isn't back yet. I have tried to call her, but she hasnt answered. My heart is in my stomach I really do not know what to do."
