Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Move?

[Mo-Better]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

C/S BA

I think rejection for some women is bound up in feelings of attractiveness...seems like some men are a bit more resilient. A man's "worth" in society is much less bound to his physical appearance than a woman's is.

I can't say ever made the first first move (like just meeting someone)...but the first move for sex if we are already on a date and the chemistry is good- YES.

Izayoi, thanks for answering the question. Guess I need to tighten up my writing skills. Your the only one, so far.

 

[Izayoi]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

Finally a female that admits that they have a paper thin ego. The reason why most females don’t make the first move is because they are afraid to be judged as they judge. Having to work for someone you desire is not in most female’s DNA. This why men will always run things.

Uh my ego in many ways is GINORMOUS....but I agree with you in general thought one. No one wants to be judged and found not worthy- especially women. Women are way too competitive with each other too and that tends to feed the ego/esteem/fear of rejection issues.

 

[YouLikeMyStyle]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

I was all ready to talk shit..
You gave the perfect answer.
Ima sit my ass down somewhere....

Why thank you

Well in the past couple of years I've tried twice and both times it didn't work out well for me to say the least ... LOL

Women making the first move just doesn't work...it can't be too easy. I have 3 older sisters and they all tell me the same thing!

1. Chasing is one thing but if your always waiting for that man to make the first move you could miss the boat.

2. This is the 21st Century can we all please move on? There is nothing wrong with a woman starting a conversation. Its not like you reached over and grabbed his dick or patted him on the ass and said lets do it.

3. I agree a lot of us are still in the dark ages but as I said earlier every man is not going to think your a ho, if you approach them properly. I must ask what type of man would you be attracted to that would think of you as being as being a ho? That's kind of disturbing.

4. OK your a naturally submissive woman, and you like to see men take charge; it turns you on. We got that! So now that a relationship has been started, getting back to my original question, when is the right time for the move to the bedroom? You wouldn't want the man to think of you as a ho.

This is not about a convo. I dont think many women are going to be afraid to start one of those. This is about the kiss/sex part. Like someone said earlier, we give yall ALL the signals--body language, comments, etc. If we don't wanna fuck you we won't put ourselves in that position.

I actually was the aggressor with the guy I'm currently messing with. He still talks about how I came at him, and I swear he FELT like he wasn't "the man" in our situation. But, I did get some payoff--he shows me ALLLL the time that he IS the man

 

[HoneyDip]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

For me it just depends on the guy and the situation. If I'm feeling the guy like that then I'll do my best to make the first move and let him take the lead from there. If I think the guy can handle a chase then I'll make him chase me. It all just depends honestly

 

[thoughtone]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

For me it just depends on the guy and the situation. If I'm feeling the guy like that then I'll do my best to make the first move and let him take the lead from there. If I think the guy can handle a chase then I'll make him chase me. It all just depends honestly

Yea, right, all a guy has to do is for you to get around him and his homeboys and say something like, “can’t you take the hint, I’m not feelin’ it” and you would run to your girlfriends for comfort. Now if I guy did that in front of you and your girls, he would be motivated to prove you and them wrong. Such is the fragility of females.

 

[jucurious]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

Yea, right, all a guy has to do is for you to get around him and his homeboys and say something like, “can’t you take the hint, I’m not feelin’ it” and you would run to your girlfriends for comfort. Now if I guy did that in front of you and your girls, he would be motivated to prove you and them wrong. Such is the fragility of females.

hmmm it depends on the woman really. now if a dude does that in front of his boys like that...he prolly wasn't worth shit anyway (same goes for a female...cuz that is just cold) but im not gonna run to my girls for comfort.

depending on the mood im in i might just laugh at dude and keep it moving...or laugh and say something sarcastic that is nice/nasty and keep it moving. i don't act up in public cuz that would only make me look foolish (well i haven't had a situation in which i NEEDED to act up yet)


and plz stop it with all the fragile women stuff...everyone knows that dudes get emotional and bothered just as much as women do maybe about different stuff and show it in a different way but still bothered all the same.

he might play that shit off in front of his boys but his ass would be crushed on the inside...which leads him to the whole "fuck her blah blah blah" thing and the over-macho acts to prove he still got it.

 

[msdee31]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

Nothing wrong with making the first move somtimes but, for me I enjoy sitting back to let him drive.It's just something about a man who takes control that's a huge turn on.

 

[thoughtone]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

hmmm it depends on the woman really. now if a dude does that in front of his boys like that...he prolly wasn't worth shit anyway (same goes for a female...cuz that is just cold) but im not gonna run to my girls for comfort.

depending on the mood im in i might just laugh at dude and keep it moving...or laugh and say something sarcastic that is nice/nasty and keep it moving. i don't act up in public cuz that would only make me look foolish (well i haven't had a situation in which i NEEDED to act up yet)


and plz stop it with all the fragile women stuff...everyone knows that dudes get emotional and bothered just as much as women do maybe about different stuff and show it in a different way but still bothered all the same.

he might play that shit off in front of his boys but his ass would be crushed on the inside...which leads him to the whole "fuck her blah blah blah" thing and the over-macho acts to prove he still got it.

I said FRAGILE! A guy says he doesn't like you shoes or he doesn't like your hair style, he won't get the pussy for a week or you never let him forget what he said, rather than take it as his opinion and not take it personally. You may say (or claim) that men and women are equally as emotional, but guys have taken rejection as life’s lessons. Women turn them in to talk shows, movies and books. REAL!

 

[Bigmario23]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

straight up most relationships I've been
in a women has chosen me first. I'm no Denzel
or Boris kujo model or nothing i'm just me
and things have worked out like that in my past relationships.
I have developed very little patience for chasing women
in general because of this. I will give honest effort
but I got a cut-off point these days. case and point
I'm in Charlotte partying for CIAA this past weekend
a 38 year old MARRIED women sits beside me
at me and my crews reserved VIP table. (I'm becoming a MILF magnet)
I immediately sized her up and she was very fine
I think I just naturally attract "some" women who exude
boldness,confidence and independence. I never view these women as hoes
or easy they just know what they want nothing wrong with that.

After about 15mins into a mature convo that included politics,
relationships,laughter..etc she drops the tid-bit about being married.
As my eyes causally glanced over her wedding ring.
She seemed to wrestle with herself internally after that info.
(tilting her head way back momentarily mumbling a few words to herself)
I can tell my conversation skills did a number on her and sips of moet
was effecting her brain. I thought about trying to end the night
in a angela basset/wesely snipes wating to exhale way.
But I had to use sound judgement and put the shoe on the other foot.
I ended the conversation in a respectful manor after about 20 more mins of talking.
Some dudes won't understand me i don't mess with MARRIED women .....but whatever.

 

[the flash]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

i like to make the first move but if a woman does i dont think any less of her its just when we get together if you are always initiating sex,or the first move i have a problem,ladies let me want for it sometime......

 

[B-Witty]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

straight up most relationships I've been
in a women has chosen me first. I'm no Denzel
or Boris kujo model or nothing i'm just me
and things have worked out like that in my past relationships.
I have developed very little patience for chasing women
in general because of this. I will give honest effort
but I got a cut-off point these days. case and point
I'm in Charlotte partying for CIAA this past weekend
a 38 year old MARRIED women sits beside me
at me and my crews reserved VIP table. (I'm becoming a MILF magnet)
I immediately sized her up and she was very fine
I think I just naturally attract "some" women who exude
boldness,confidence and independence. I never view these women as hoes
or easy they just know what they want nothing wrong with that.

After about 15mins into a mature convo that included politics,
relationships,laughter..etc she drops the tid-bit about being married.
As my eyes causally glanced over her wedding ring.
She seemed to wrestle with herself internally after that info.
(tilting her head way back momentarily mumbling a few words to herself)
I can tell my conversation skills did a number on her and sips of moet
was effecting her brain. I thought about trying to end the night
in a angela basset/wesely snipes wating to exhale way.
But I had to use sound judgement and put the shoe on the other foot.
I ended the conversation in a respectful manor after about 20 more mins of talking.
Some dudes won't understand me i don't mess with MARRIED women .....but whatever.

and u my friend should be commended.. good job

 

[dHustla]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

I like making the first move because it allows me to go after who I am attracted to rather than having to deal with a man approaching me who I wouldn't mess with. But alot of men dont like when the woman is the aggressor

The bold text above is the reason I tell women that if they don't approach men then they shouldn't complain about not getting what they want in a man! I'm grown, when I see what I want and its available... I go after it, plain and simple.

But is she sees me and is attracted to me but won't come up to me for whatever reason....she's weak. Afraid of rejection? Even Submissive? Suck it up baby!!!, be a woman about it and make it happen. I like being approached.

 

[dHustla]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

I have developed very little patience for chasing women
in general because of this.

Same here. Absolutely none.

After about 15mins into a mature convo that included politics,
relationships,laughter..etc she drops the tid-bit about being married.
As my eyes causally glanced over her wedding ring.
She seemed to wrestle with herself internally after that info.
(tilting her head way back momentarily mumbling a few words to herself)
I can tell my conversation skills did a number on her and sips of moet
was effecting her brain. I thought about trying to end the night
in a angela basset/wesely snipes wating to exhale way.
But I had to use sound judgement and put the shoe on the other foot.
I ended the conversation in a respectful manor after about 20 more mins of talking.
Some dudes won't understand me i don't mess with MARRIED women .....but whatever.

I respect that man, I have had to do that too. It is NOT an easy thing to do, especially with alcohol, jazz, and a cool environment in the mix.

 

[followup]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

Women should take the initiative, also. Sometimes i'm already in a relationship but wouldn't mind meeting someone new, but not to disrespect my relationship i don't holla at other women...but if they holler'd at me it'd be all good

What?

This thread is giving me some good insight. I might try to make the first move a little more often

 

[nukdollars]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

I dont like the chase. If you are feeling me I dont feel like I should have to be jumping through hoops. It doesnt bother me at all when a woman comes up to me, that dont make her a hoe, it makes her somebody that knows what she wants.

But I do think women take rejection worse than men. I have had some women try to holla at me and I tell them no respectfully and they lose they mind. Some get rejected and call you gay, say you probably couldnt handle it or something crazy like that.​

co-sign

 

[Mo-Better]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

A number of the women have stated they like the chase, that it turns them on. OK! But what about knowing you could walk up on someone and make them change their plans for a day? Turn their life around just because you got up and made your presence felt.

These women do exist and they get what they want because they're not sitting back waiting on that man to make that move. There are some who claim there's no good men out there. Yeah they do exist. But maybe if your not finding yours by waiting to be chased, maybe its time to use a different method.

(some of you are not going to like this) I think the problem is women have gotten lazy. The little things it takes to meet someone are not done anymore.

Here's an example: I moved into an apartment a few years ago. After having gotten the furniture and boxes into the apartment this lady in the next apartment went out and came back with hot pizza and beer. She figured I might be hungry. I was floored! It was a very nice gesture and we got to be friends. Ladies that is how you meet men. I didn't think of her as being a ho. As I said before its in your approach. But you better believe I thought about her and what she did and it made a difference. Her method may be old fashoned but it damn sure worked.

 

[bearh420]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

I like making the first move because it allows me to go after who I am attracted to rather than having to deal with a man approaching me who I wouldn't mess with. But alot of men dont like when the woman is the aggressor

i like ya thinkin

 

[sakinnuso]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

I don't understand the problem. Men make the first move. Then again, isn't it how you define 'first move'? I think it's just nature for a man to approach a woman. It's not only awkward for a woman to be the sole aggressor, it sets an odd precedent throughout the relationship.

As for the "first move", if a man makes eye contact and the woman gives her subtle suggestion - either with her eyes (holding her look a little longer or looking back again to see if you're looking), a smile, or with body language (she's leaning in your direction as opposed to turning completely away once you've looked at her), then that's the MOVE right there. All a brother needs to do is go in and talk. Close The Deal.

Whether he's smooth or says some off base shit is pretty much - I think - what makes or breaks his chances of pussy success. She might be difficult at first, or like a little verbal chase at that point, but she's already let you know that on a primal level, she's interested. That's it. Animal shit hasn't changed since the dawn of man. Men that don't get this seem 'fearful' to me. Man up. Just sayin'. Damn.

 

[aba_abstract2k]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

This is strictly for the ladies


1.Initiate
Making the first move is a good thing because rejection builds character. Not getting picked for the football team or losing at a spelling builds character and humbles you.
Losing is sometimes good for you.
Parents and Teachers don't want to hurt childrens feelings - and so they tell the kids their are no losers...Thats not the reality of life

I know all you ladies know a average looking woman or hoodrat who always end up with the good men..Why is that? What are they doing that you aren't?

2.Exposure
Many women complain they can't find a good man, but they stay in the house or don't go places where men are..
As of late i notice alot of woman walking with their head down not making any eye contact with anyone...and they ask me why men don't approach them.

3.Interest Level
When you expose yourself to the places where the men are it opens up something called Interest Level..
This shows that you are interested in what he is interested in,
and that generally will open up your chances for being approached
so you approachability level goes up..
Here's a trick - If you are at a place to meet a man act OVER interested in the event or place you are attending...
Example: If you at a car show, really show ALOT of interest
If you are at a sporting event, show ALOT of support for the team
You'll most certainly get approached.


4.Chasing
Chasing may be very flattering to You as a woman, but it takes a toll on us as men and may sometimes be degrading as man if you don't accomplish the set goal..
Here's what chasing does, it makes you build anticipation for something which tricks your mind into thinking the result or goal is gonna be greater than it actually is
Chasing basically signifies that you want to play a game and me personally I don't play games. My time is much too valuable.
If you are over 30 there is no reason to be chased nor to chase


5.Confidence
This is why your friends always end up with the good man and you are struggling to get a half-way decent man.
Say what you mean and mean what you say.
Don't let a guy that you really don't want date have you number...You have to learn to say NO

I head women love a confident man, guess what ladies
men love a confident woman...

Confidence also comes into play when you want to be intimate with a man. Its OK to have to sex with man when you first meet him...
don't make it a habit. Be liberated, if you feel a certain vibe with someone you can move as fast as you want...
I have many friends who claim to be sleeping with many women,
ARE THEY ALL HO'S...we need to kill the double standard

 

[aba_abstract2k]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

This is strictly for the ladies


1.Initiate
Making the first move is a good thing because rejection builds character. Not getting picked for the football team or losing at a spelling builds character and humbles you.
Losing is sometimes good for you.
Parents and Teachers don't want to hurt childrens feelings - and so they tell the kids their are no losers...Thats not the reality of life

I know all you ladies know a average looking woman or hoodrat who always end up with the good men..Why is that? What are they doing that you aren't?

2.Exposure
Many women complain they can't find a good man, but they stay in the house or don't go places where men are..
As of late i notice alot of woman walking with their head down not making any eye contact with anyone...and they ask me why men don't approach them.

3.Interest Level
When you expose yourself to the places where the men are it opens up something called Interest Level..
This shows that you are interested in what he is interested in,
and that generally will open up your chances for being approached
so you approachability level goes up..
Here's a trick - If you are at a place to meet a man act OVER interested in the event or place you are attending...
Example: If you at a car show, really show ALOT of interest
If you are at a sporting event, show ALOT of support for the team
You'll most certainly get approached.


4.Chasing
Chasing may be very flattering to You as a woman, but it takes a toll on us as men and may sometimes be degrading as man if you don't accomplish the set goal..
Here's what chasing does, it makes you build anticipation for something which tricks your mind into thinking the result or goal is gonna be greater than it actually is
Chasing basically signifies that you want to play a game and me personally I don't play games. My time is much too valuable.
If you are over 30 there is no reason to be chased nor to chase


5.Confidence
This is why your friends always end up with the good man and you are struggling to get a half-way decent man.
Say what you mean and mean what you say.
Don't let a guy that you really don't want date have you number...You have to learn to say NO

I heard women love a confident man, guess what ladies
men love a confident woman...

Confidence also comes into play when you want to be intimate with a man. Its OK to have to sex with man when you first meet him...
don't make it a habit. Be liberated, if you feel a certain vibe with someone you can move as fast as you want...
I have many friends who claim to be sleeping with many women,
ARE THEY ALL HO'S...we need to kill the double standard

 

[dHustla]

Re: Let's Flip the Script! On the How Long Question! Why Not Women Make The First Mov

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Deserves a bump