Is a Man a fool for not wanting to be with a woman who loves him and
- Thread starter FAMU2g3
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FAMU2g3 said:
No because apparently she's not perfect for you. Maybe it's not the perfect time. Never apologize for how you feel.
That's just life.
If you string her along knowing this, then that's selfish.
Dont force yaself to be in something you dont feel ready for.
NewyorkRealTalk said:
co-sign, her happiness is not worth you being unhappy especially since it'll take it's toll on you eventually. Just take it slow and let things progress naturally
Hey if your not feeling her, your not feeling her. Better to let her go and find happiness with someone that can give her what she's going to expect back. The bottom line to all this is, "if your not happy with her now, she's not going to be happy with you later." If there's no love there, it ain't gonna work.
Ya'll cant answer nothing here w/o trying to clown somebody. 
femmenoire said:
True.
But Im not stringing her along.
She knows how I feel.
Just seems as if she forgets what I say.
Time to remove myself from the situation as she cant handle the "nature" of my love for her. And at this point, all Im doing is hurting her.
I do love her. Just not like that.
And Ive stated this, so Im not being grimey.
Just needed some more opinions. Shit is hard, but I know Im not happy.
Just feel bad cuz shorty is a good person. *sigh*
FAMU2g3 said:
I tell people this all the time. Just because he or she is a good person, doesn't mean they are the right person for you.
I tell people this who have good jobs but are miserable. All the say is "But I got a good job!" Well it's making you have high blood pressure, you never see your kids, etc. etc. It ain't right for you.
A good thing at the wrong time or with the wrong feelings is still wrong.
No, you're not a fool.....you're an IDIOT! 
Gameboy..he saying the girl is better for friend mode. Like saying he loves her but hes not IN LOVE with her.
gameboy said:some of ya'll are so used to crying and hiding in the bushes, trying to bust your girl sucking the neighbors dick,,, that when a good woman comes along, ya'll don't know how to act,,,, some people just crave drama,,,
Exactly. He sounds just like sistas that run around crying about "there's no good men out there".
There's a perfectly good one in front of him (assuming she looks good) but yet he just ignores her.
Next you'll wanna wife up the neighborhood jump-off, then come crying on here wondering why she cheated on you and saying "all women ain't shit"
femmenoire said:
co-sign, 'Nuff said!
Move on man and find you a bitch you like, damn near every women will treat your Ass like a king if you have any game at all. It’s hard as hell to find a good man.
In summary move the fuck on or you will be miserable as hell.
You don't owe me anything for this advice.
whatever25
In summary move the fuck on or you will be miserable as hell.
You don't owe me anything for this advice.
whatever25
if she's ugly,,, i can understand. but if he's physically attracted to her,,, he needs counseling,,,NewyorkRealTalk said:
i'm telling you,,, there are lots of (i hate to say) Black people who are so used to drama (the way they were raised, and all their relationships),,, that when a person steps to them with their shit together,,, they subconsciously sabotage the shit.
yea i mean 4real.NewyorkRealTalk said:Ya'll cant answer nothing here w/o trying to clown somebody.
this is just a serious question
and if you can't offer any constructive advice,
then please prohibit yourself from the "reply" button.
gameboy said:
If a girl is sexy and she loves me, that wont make me go for her if my feelings aint for her. If you not feeling that vibe it would be horrible to mess with her because she looks good. But you dont love her. I see what you saying but I think he means he just aint feeling her in a relationship type way.
Yo just do what's best for you, she might get her feelings hurt but, if she's half the person you claim she is, she won't take it that bad and get over it. Just don't go cryin' your eyes out for her after talkin' bot you made a mistake. You need to be thinkin' bout what you gonna not be on the board talkin' to us
gameboy said:
Preach!
Unfortunately it looks this phenomenon applies to black men as well as black women
gameboy said:
True but this ain't that situation, at least I don't think so... I digress
Timing is a very big part of romantic relations.
NewyorkRealTalk said:
But I'm sure he wouldn't mind just fucking her, right?
It's OK to just keep fucking her (if she's such a good person), but not have a serious relationship?
Niggas, I swear...
XXXplosive said:But I'm sure he wouldn't mind just fucking her, right?
It's OK to just keep fucking her (if she's such a good person), but not have a serious relationship?
Niggas, I swear...
Maybe it's just me but, sounds like your letting a personal situation get the better of your basis for conversation on this topic.
FAMU2g3 said:
MESSAGE!
For right now, DO NOT tell (or show) her that her feelings for you are not mutual! What you're feeling could easily be a temporary resistance to commitment. Which is normal when a man is in transition from single life to a committed relationship. We (men) wish for the girl of our dreams, while single, but generally choke when we have to confront all the compromises, responsibilities and discipline we need in order to accommodate our dream girl when she arrives. It’s not a cause for concern… just nature taking its course.
Still… if you express to (and subsequently crush) her with unsubstantiated rejection when she's at her all time high in love with you and then you realize later that you DO want to be with her... her pain, lessoned sense of value to you and fear of abandonment with you will dog your potential relationship. Women are emotional beings, whose feelings have to be nurtured, protected and supported for them to function in a relationship at their highest level of efficiency & happiness. It takes SO much for women these days to be willing/able to really go all out for a man the way you're describing this woman does for you... That effort has to be rewarded. Period.
Give yourself some time to do a little soul searching, but do all that you can to support and reciprocate her love for you in the meantime. If you later discover that she is truly not the one for you, she will still be hurt, but at least your loving manner of ‘letting go’ will be defensible and chivalrous. If you discover later that she is the one for you, you will already have a firm foundation to keep building on. It’s a win/win situation, if you take my advice.
Lastly, I don’t know your girl, but she sounds like she’s a keeper… More so than 90% of the women I see out here on the single scene. It doesn’t get much better than what you got. If you don’t want her… PM me her info and I’ll take her… depending on her looks & sexual skills, that is.
BrooklynRebel said:
It's just you...
XXXplosive said:But I'm sure he wouldn't mind just fucking her, right?
It's OK to just keep fucking her (if she's such a good person), but not have a serious relationship?
Niggas, I swear...
So he should just keep having sex with the girl? Thats just using her and she obviously want a relationship..not to be used lol. Thats just not right. Maybe im cut from a different cloth than everybody else but I dont use females. If she aint my girl and she trying to be my girl im not going to fuck her so I can have her bitching in my ear about me just wanted her pussy or something.
gameboy said:
That's part of the problem. Im not. Every time she tries to be all affectionate, I end up pushing her away and hurting her.
Other than that, Im very good to her. She has my back and I have hers. Ive given her stacks, she's given me stacks .she knows she can call me for ANYTHING and vice versa....Just that everything is not there...and call me what you want, but Im trying to be attracted to my mate, ...that's all Im saying.
gameboy said:typical sistaz gripe,,, if the brotha don't smell like henny & weed smoke everyday,,, ya'll don't want him,,,
constantly yelling,,, "all men are dogs!",,, "i can't find a good man",,, yet ya'll play all the nice men with jobs, to the left,,,
CO-SIGN!! Told a chick that yesterday and she got upset.
NewyorkRealTalk said:
Re-read my statement.
That's NOT what I meant
You completely got it backwards
FAMU2g3 said:
Well you know what playa she sound like a good catch to me so if you don't want here send her this way.
Nuff nigga probly just waitin' for you to pass that up and you should if she ain't for you. Talk to her and get it all out on the table. Let her know you just "wanna be friends"(make sure you tell her at her crib - so she don't break-up all your shit) and... well hope for the best
XXXplosive said:
Maybe im not reading in between the lines or something. Imma reply again once I get what you saying. When I read it I got the vibe of you saying just keep fucking her.
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