How recruiters are in each branch of the military

This shit was funny.
That comment section is hilarious.

I was in Bravo Co. Charlie Co. was 20 yards across from us, up an inclined field so their barracks was about 10 ft higher than ours. 3 weeks into our cycle, C Co. filled up with females so of course, at any given opportunity we'd be staring up the hill trying to look for some titties and ass.

The following week, at the end of the day, a handful of us were out in the pit sitting on railroad ties, spit shining our boots and smoking while we were trying to peep females. Their DS on duty for the night came out and yelled out, "Are you Privates looking at MY girls!?"
We all looked at one another like, "Oh shit!," and got to our feet and went to Parade Rest..."No Drill Sergeant!"
Looking back NOW, I know that he's already called OUR Drill to get in on this shit JUST to smoke us.

What! Are you Privates gonna sit there and lie to my face? Which one of you Privates was looking at my girls?
None of us were Drill Sgt!
He started yelling louder, Don't you lie to me...WHICH ONE OF YOU PRIVATES WAS LOOKING AT MY GIRLS!!
We stuck to our guns and said none of us so there started the smoke session...DROP! YOU DROP RIGHT NOW AND PUSH FT MCCLELLAN TO CHINA!

At the time, they would only make us do 10 push ups at a time but it would just turn into doing burpees...Get Up!...Get Down...Get Up!...Get Down
.
After we're a good 60 push up into the smoke session, OUR DS emerges from the Barracks..."What's going on Drill Sergeant?" I caught your Privates looking up here at my girls. "WHAT!? You Privates were looking up there at HIS girls?"
Then he took the baton and continued to smoke our asses for another 30-45 minutes. "You tire Private? Rollover...The Dying Cockroach...You tired Private? The Mountain Climber..."

All during that session, the females were looking out of the windows at us with towels wrapped around them from coming out of the shower. Them muhfuckas made damn sure that THIS Platoon was gone be out cold as soon as lights out hit.

:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
 
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Damn, that recruiter shit was spot on. It's been more than 30 years since I EOD and I see shit hasn't changed.

The Marine recruiter threw me and my friend out of the office. He started arguing with my friend about something, I think it had to do with the marines being the toughest. Later on, someone told me the recruiter called us punks and thugs, said we would be dead or in jail within a year.
 

honorableelite

I got to have that DD 214 shirt. :yes:

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He has a Child Support Veteran tee. :roflmao:
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The Drill Sergeant's answer to every damn thing. :lol:

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Damn,this thread put a smile on my face!! It took me right back to my basic training days!! When bruh started talkin that "Half Right" and the mail call, I just started laughin my azz off!! Anyway, the 6yrs spent in the army was the time of my life, I met sum good people and I saw & learned how this corporation works!! Anyway, good post!!
 
When I was 17 a marine recruiter pulled up to my high-school. He invited me and one of my boys to stop by his office after school so we could hear his schpiel. We sat at his desk and he cleared his throat then pulled out one of those big old school family albums. The album was jam packed with homegrown pictures of exotic looking bitches fucking, sucking and spreading. He basically said that these bitches think of they suck your dick hard enough that you might marry them and take them to the us. Their sole mission in life is to get a military man.
I got him with the awww jeez I don't want to die. He told me to relax because we haven't been in a war for a long time and chances are during my years of service there won't be any major conflicts. Literally 3 months later 911 happened.
 
He was on point like a muhfucka with the AF DFAC dining experience. :giggle:

The jarhead eating food colored crayons under fire...

:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:

Bookmarked for the laughs
Yep...best comment, "When I ate at an a Air Force chow hall in Kuwait for the first time as a Marine I felt like an abused child who didn’t know that they were abused until they went to someone else’s house."
 

I remember when my Company were Senior Troops with just a week until graduation. On a Saturday morning, two of our Drill Sergeants came to our platoon's bay on some casual walkthrough shit.

They were all chill and talking to us like we weren't new boots anymore and shit...then SUDDENLY, DS Slaughter looked up at a ceiling panel and went ape shit!

We're all like, WTF? :dunno: :oops:

This muhfucka grabbed a trash can and climbed up to lift the panel. He pulled out Playboy and Hustler mags, pogey bait (snacks), and cigarettes.
We were stunned! :oops::eek2::eek::dunno:

The DS' blew their gaskets and went ballistic. Our platoon was pushing our bay from one side of the barracks all the way across Post. They smoked the living shit out of us for two hours, tore up every bunk and footlocker, pushed up a lot of the ceiling tiles with a mop handle to see what else might fall out.

Once they had brought us all to muscle failure, they had us recover and locked up at Parade Rest for another half hour, reading us the Riot Act. They then made us GI the bay and put shit back together. When they bounced, we took a look at the evidence.

:hmm::angry::curse: They'd set us up. Ain't one of us even THOUGHT about hiding shit in the ceiling the whole time we'd been there, and our cycle started three weeks after we'd reported to Basic, waiting for the Company to fill up. The magazines were from months before we'd arrived in May and all of the candy was old too. They put that shit up there while we were at chow or on Pass or something. This was the "Last Hurrah" to get one more good smoke session out of us when we weren't fucking up in any way before graduation.

I can't remember how many times I'd been bashed on the forehead by a DS' Brown Round. Them sumbitches use that brim like a bird's beak to peck a Private with. :lol:
 
Yep...best comment, "When I ate at an a Air Force chow hall in Kuwait for the first time as a Marine I felt like an abused child who didn’t know that they were abused until they went to someone else’s house."
No lies detected. :lol:
Air Force dining facilities made Army A Rations (fresh foods) seem like we were eating kibbles and bits at the Chow Hall. :roflmao:
I seem to recall that in Incirlik, Turkey, they even bussed the tables.
 
No doubt. When I was in Guam a friend asked me to show her Army friend around the base. He was on his leave from Korea. I took him to the DFAC he said why are you getting so much food. I said get what you want then go back and get more to go if you want. He said we can only get one meat and one starch. I just started laughing. Finished eating and he picked his tray up. I said where you going with that. He said to clear my tray. I said put it down they have people who get paid to do that. He just had that look like this is not right but I like it. I said this is not the Army. Then i took him to the gym told him it was 24 hrs and the DFAC opens back up for midnight meal. Plus they serve dinner and breakfast. You know lasagna with a ham and cheese omlette on the side. He about lost his mind.
 
I remember when my Company were Senior Troops with just a week until graduation. On a Saturday morning, two of our Drill Sergeants came to our platoon's bay on some casual walkthrough shit.

They were all chill and talking to us like we weren't new boots anymore and shit...then SUDDENLY, DS Slaughter looked up at a ceiling panel and went ape shit!

We're all like, WTF? :dunno: :oops:

This muhfucka grabbed a trash can and climbed up to lift the panel. He pulled out Playboy and Hustler mags, pogey bait (snacks), and cigarettes.
We were stunned! :oops::eek2::eek::dunno:

The DS' blew their gaskets and went ballistic. Our platoon was pushing our bay from one side of the barracks all the way across Post. They smoked the living shit out of us for two hours, tore up every bunk and footlocker, pushed up a lot of the ceiling tiles with a mop handle to see what else might fall out.

Once they had brought us all to muscle failure, they had us recover and locked up at Parade Rest for another half hour, reading us the Riot Act. They then made us GI the bay and put shit back together. When they bounced, we took a look at the evidence.

:hmm::angry::curse: They'd set us up. Ain't one of us even THOUGHT about hiding shit in the ceiling the whole time we'd been there, and our cycle started three weeks after we'd reported to Basic, waiting for the Company to fill up. The magazines were from months before we'd arrived in May and all of the candy was old too. They put that shit up there while we were at chow or on Pass or something. This was the "Last Hurrah" to get one more good smoke session out of us when we weren't fucking up in any way before graduation.

I can't remember how many times I'd been bashed on the forehead by a DS' Brown Round. Them sumbitches use that brim like a bird's beak to peck a Private with. :lol:
:lol: :lol: :lol:

 
No doubt. When I was in Guam a friend asked me to show her Army friend around the base. He was on his leave from Korea. I took him to the DFAC he said why are you getting so much food. I said get what you want then go back and get more to go if you want. He said we can only get one meat and one starch. I just started laughing. Finished eating and he picked his tray up. I said where you going with that. He said to clear my tray. I said put it down they have people who get paid to do that. He just had that look like this is not right but I like it. I said this is not the Army. Then i took him to the gym told him it was 24 hrs and the DFAC opens back up for midnight meal. Plus they serve dinner and breakfast. You know lasagna with a ham and cheese omlette on the side. He about lost his mind.
I was the same way when I first walked in an Air Force base while I was stationed in Okinawa. I was stationed on Marine base camp Schwab. Man, I went to Kadena Air Force Base for the first time, couldn't believe how they were living and the cafeteria food. Man. As a Marine, we get the short end of the stick in everything.
 
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I know it ain't no consolation but ya'll still got Dress A's on fleek...Army still look the same, Air Force look like bus drivers, Coast Guard don't know who they stole from, and the Navy needs end those damn bellbottoms and who thought blue camo was a great idea for BDU's?

I was the same way when I first an Air Force while I was stationed in Okinawa. I was stationed on Marine base camp Schwab. Man, I went to Kadena Air Force Base for the first, could believe how they were living and cafeteria food. Man. As a Marine, we get the short end of the stick in everything.
 
I know it ain't no consolation but ya'll still got Dress A's on fleek...Army still look the same, Air Force look like bus drivers, Coast Guard don't know who they stole from, and the Navy needs end those damn bellbottoms and who thought blue camo was a great idea for BDU's?
I like the Army's new throwback dress uniform. It looks like they harkened back to WWII with the olive drab and khaki colors but the service cap looks German-styled. I was surprised that they brought back the "Cunt" cap but a black beret would look odd in this uniform.

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