When i was in the band in high school,.....i forgot which school the football team was playing....but the game was over and the buses would usually stop at a mcdonalds or a burger king,....or at least an area that had some of those type of eating establishments,.....and we'd all get off the bus, and they'd give us an hour or so to get some food and eat and board the buses before heading back. Well the game ended late.....so it was after 10pm before we stopped in the parkinglot....and there was a Wendy's and a KFC. Its pitch dark out there....not much lighting. Mufuckas jump off the bus and go running toward Wendys. Now its 5 fuckin buses of band members.....we were like 300 strong......some took the long route and ran all the way around the parkinglot to the restaurant....and others were like fuck it and decided to cut through this big ass row of bushes (they were like 5ft high) that divided the parkinglot and Wendys. Well little to be known.....im runnin behind a group of bitches, and i could just see niggaz jumpin thru the bushes, some even trying to hurdle them.....and immediately after them jumping through...i'd see their head.....then see them no more......and u hear them screaming and shit. On the other side of those bushes, was a big ass ditch/creek....whichever u prefer to call it. And it was like an 8ft drop at a steep ass slant on the other side of those bushes. Shit was filled wit bricks, old tires, water, bottles, frogs, and whatever else was down there. At least 30-40 mufuckas jumped thru those bushes to their demise before everybody else realized it was a fuckin hazard. Man by the time some of them came into Wendys and i saw the damage that was done.....some were all cut the fuck up....some were completely soaked from falling completely into the creek. Ambulance had to be called to treat a few of them for cuts and shit. Jokes were put on all them mufuckas on the ride home.
In high school There was a public health and safety law course I took (I wanted to know my rights) and that class ended up taking us on a field trip to a county jail. We saw the inside where they first bring you and all the stuff whatever.. It was lunch and everybody was hungry, including me. We had another place to go but the teachers said we would stop at mcdonalds or something in an hour or so. Everybody moaned and groaned. The guards said they had lunch for us that they didn't give out yet...everyone said YES! Whatever it is bring it and we'll eat it. I instantly knew what time it was. I know people who have been to jail, not a badge of honor just a fact of life and the 1 thing they say is NEVER EAT THE FUCKING FOOD. it was like when Simba looked up to the clouds and saw Mufasa I saw junebug telling me "Don't eat the food nigga WHATEVER you do don't eat the food" So the guards bring out the sandwiches and chips and juice and they get to me and i say no thank I'll wait. Everyone is looking like bills you gonna wait an hour you TRIPPING. I said yea I'll wait. Everybody, teachers included scarfed that shit down like it was the best meal ever. Even dummies were saying shit this ain't so bad.. I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop. We conclude this portion of it and then roll out to the bus. Everybody is laughing at ME saying you should've eaten. I laugh it off like ok whatever. 15 minutes into the drive we're kind of in no man's land. No real stops we're in the woods kind of on a trail..dangerous ass trail for this big ass bus now that I think about it but here we are on this hill.. and suddenly the teacher lets one rip. BLAAAAAAAT. everybody laughs she says its natural just calm down. Next thing you know another kid lets one rip LAAAT BLAAAAT and they laugh at that shit. everybody having a good ol time talking about roll the window down and shit.
The bus driver says "ahhh shit" and we stop on this motherfucking hill on an incline. he puts the emergency breaks on the bus and hops off the bus.. into the fucking woods holding his ass
everyone is DYING AT THIS POINT.
until.
Blaaaat blaaaaaaat blaaaat
this is before the invention of a cameraphone which really isn't that long ago but still
i will remember this until the day i no longer exist.
EVERY FUCKING PERSON ON THE BUS farted and then proceeded to run into the fucking woods into the tall grass and behind the trees like a big foot looking for a place to take a shit
i was literally the only person left on the bus. the only fucking one. not a soul was on the bus on this incline on the hill. they were gone a good 20 minutes. the last person came back like 5 minutes later than that and nobody said a fucking word. not 1 word.
we didn't go to the next place. we didn't go to macdonalds. we went back to the school EARLY might i add and everyone went home. it was like they were all in the fox hole shitting and made a pact to never speak about it again. bus driver shitting next to a student who's shitting next to a teacher. they all had ptsd and im just on the bus having a heart attack on the way home im talking about a good soulful hearty laugh. the kind of laugh where your body is sore. i am laughing. crying wiping my eyes. stopping. coughing wheezing and then laughing again the entire 30 minute ride i get off the bus i fall to my knees in the front of the school and am laughing as they scatter to their separate places and walking home trying to not remember. i stay there for 10 minutes until campus security comes and carries me to the office like i was jesus and they had broken my legs just carrying me. they call my mom she comes to get me i am still crying. i am laughing so hard i am hurt. literally laughing like a reflex at everything. i get in the car im laughing. i get home im laughing. i do homework im laughing i watch fucking a drama on tv im laughing i literally went to bed with tears in my eyes.. i woke up and showered with them still flowing. in fact as i type a single tear just dropped from my eye like the indian in that commercial
i get to class the next day its commotion going on until i walk in.
EVERYBODY looked at me like i was hitler walking in coming to select jews to go to the camp. just eyeing me. and i swear on everything holy the teacher looked at me...and had the fear in her eyes i would laugh again shook her head like please don't do it and somehow by the grace of a higher power i didn't. inside i was crying all over again. but outside i was mute. we had class. they thought i had let it go.
the bell rung.. i fell to my knees again and i just went home for the weekend...the field trip was on a tuesday i went home on the wed and didn't come back until monday. monday i got it out of my system.
, like we didn't know any better. He got 4 words in, and everything went quiet. He looked at us like "What?" Shy D goes, "Maaan, I oughta slap the shit outta you!", and out of nowhere an orange slice caught Gil right above his collar and went down his shirt. He never asked to join in again. 
(what?)! We were trying to get her to chill but she just kept on. She tells Mrs. Thomas that when she gets home she was going to tell her cousin to come whoop her white ass!
then he said "Ay wait hold up..what the fuck you laughing for??" I was trying to catch my breath so i could say something but he walked up to me like"Oh you think this shit funny huhUHHH!!" and knocked me to the floor..for the next few minutes i was getting stomped and kicked in the back and in my stomach by dude and his friends,only things i could see from my view were his dress shoes and the friend's sneakers coming towards my face,my head was bouncing on the floor like dude in Menace II Society when Cain was stomping him out 
but at any rate the brothers ran up on him and said hey we heard you don't like black people...white boy said yeah so....needless to say they lumped that nigga up something serious.....it was funny because dude was like yeah so like he just knew he was good dude left and we never saw him again