Domestic Violence/Physical?
- Thread starter onyxfemme
- Start date
I have been and it took me along time to get out of the situation.The main thing is the man using emotional abuse to break you down,so you don't think anyone else wants you.Im glad I got out the situation because one of us would have ended up dead,it was that serious.
To add on to what I said, I had alot of family I could have told but I chose to keep it to myself because I thought it was something I was doing. I was a teenager when this was happening so my mindset wasn't how it is now. It sometimes affects me to this day when I date or in a relationship but most of the time I am able to push it out of my mind.
To add on to what I said, I had alot of family I could have told but I chose to keep it to myself because I thought it was something I was doing. I was a teenager when this was happening so my mindset wasn't how it is now. It sometimes affects me to this day when I date or in a relationship but most of the time I am able to push it out of my mind.
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LoneStar29
Banned
DAMN SS ... I'm glad you got out of that situation girl
I was in a relationship that got a bit physical at times along time ago ... I wouldn't call it "abusive" cuz we both played our part in fucking the relationship up ... I'm not ashamed to admit my part in it cuz it made me a better person
I've never been in an actual "abusive" relationship ... I've been in relationships with men that I found out after were abusive to the girl they had before or after me but not while they were with me
I can't even begin to image how that would feel
DAMN SS ... I'm glad you got out of that situation girl
I was in a relationship that got a bit physical at times along time ago ... I wouldn't call it "abusive" cuz we both played our part in fucking the relationship up ... I'm not ashamed to admit my part in it cuz it made me a better person
I've never been in an actual "abusive" relationship ... I've been in relationships with men that I found out after were abusive to the girl they had before or after me but not while they were with me
I can't even begin to image how that would feel
Thanks, I mean I fought back but what the hell can I do against someone that much bigger than me. I know people will blame me for staying but during that time that was the only person I felt like was caring about me. Even though it was negative.
LoneStar29
Banned
I'm not gonna lie ... you did have a choice ... but at the same time I'm able to consider a persons mind frame while in that situation ... alot of times there is mental and emotional abuse along with the physical so I can understand where you're coming from
Have you ever seen or spoke to him after the relationship ended???
I totally agree with you,I know I had a choice and I decided to stay,so whatever came after that was my fault which I understand and can deal with. And no I haven't because the way I am now,I would just shoot his ass on sight.
Interesting responses! I am so glad that you ladies decided to share. I have been in physical, mental and emotional abuse relationships.
I remember me and one of my exes fought like we were Ike and Tina.
He knew how to push my buttons and I would swing or I would push his buttons and he would shove or push me. I have a BAD temper when I do click out...And one of us was going to get really hurt.I walked away from that relationship and never looked back. I am so glad that I did....SO SO Glad...
Be back w/ more to share...I have been there done it all..
I remember me and one of my exes fought like we were Ike and Tina.
He knew how to push my buttons and I would swing or I would push his buttons and he would shove or push me. I have a BAD temper when I do click out...And one of us was going to get really hurt.I walked away from that relationship and never looked back. I am so glad that I did....SO SO Glad...
Be back w/ more to share...I have been there done it all..
LoneStar29
Banned
No ... I dont agree with that ... I don't think it was your fault ... maybe poor judgement was your fault ... but not what he did to you
*e-hug*
ITA-
No ... I dont agree with that ... I don't think it was your fault ... maybe poor judgement was your fault ... but not what he did to you
*e-hug*
First off, thank you all for sharing, that takes a lot of strength. Also, I am VERY happy that you have gained the strength to get out and hopefully stay out of those relationships.
I'm glad you touched on how walking away isn't that easy. People really don't understand DV and the issues w/ it. When I look at all the CB/Rihanna threads on these message boards I just shake my head.
No I have not been in an abusive or physical relationship but I witnessed my mom be hit and stalked by my sister's father while she was prego w/ my sister up until I was about 20, so like 8 years or so. I resented her for YEARS b/c I thought she was weak and a hypocrite. i was pissed that she would let him do that, let my sister see it and all of that. as I got older, and then w/ a women and gendered studies minor and seeing my clients go thru it....it changes your whole perspective.
anyway,
thanks for sharing. that take strength
I'm glad you touched on how walking away isn't that easy. People really don't understand DV and the issues w/ it. When I look at all the CB/Rihanna threads on these message boards I just shake my head.
No I have not been in an abusive or physical relationship but I witnessed my mom be hit and stalked by my sister's father while she was prego w/ my sister up until I was about 20, so like 8 years or so. I resented her for YEARS b/c I thought she was weak and a hypocrite. i was pissed that she would let him do that, let my sister see it and all of that. as I got older, and then w/ a women and gendered studies minor and seeing my clients go thru it....it changes your whole perspective.
anyway,
thanks for sharing. that take strength
No ... I dont agree with that ... I don't think it was your fault ... maybe poor judgement was your fault ... but not what he did to you
*e-hug*
co siggy
No ... I dont agree with that ... I don't think it was your fault ... maybe poor judgement was your fault ... but not what he did to you
*e-hug*
*hugz back*
Thanks
LoneStar29
Banned
I think sometimes women in abusive relationships don't see how it affects the people around them who love them so much ... sometimes it feels like we're hurting just as much for them
I think the big mistake loved ones make though is the judging factor in it all ... we need to step back and just be a support for that person ... making them feel bad about their situation I think will only make things worse IMO
I have a cousin who was in a very bad physical relationship ... REALLY BAD ... she hid it from me but told her sisters ... they flipped out and cut her off ... they were like "she's so weak and embarrassing blahblahblah" ... I told them that taking away the only love and support she has (her fam) is just as bad as what he's doing to her ... it's her life so you can tell her as much as you want but the final choice will come from her so just be there in case one day she decides to up and leave at least she'll have some place to go then. Thank GOD she did come to her senses and left him and the fam greeted her with open arms ... she's doing much better now
An ex of mine from back in the day (when I was 19,20) one day got heated and attacked me with a butcher knife. I had to WRESTLE her ass off the wall to get the knife out of her hands before she did major damage to ME, my homey, or HER homegirl. I consider my WRESTLING being physical. I consider her knife welding, stab 'em up like O.J. mentality DOMESTIC.
Her momma told me she was CRAZY but I didn't listen. Young Love ain't nothin' to fuckz with Word to Chris Brown and RiRi.
Her momma told me she was CRAZY but I didn't listen. Young Love ain't nothin' to fuckz with Word to Chris Brown and RiRi.
LoneStar29
Banned
DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN that's fucked up ... sounds like she was trippin' big time
Did you manage to get her under control by wrestling her ... you didn't have to use any additional force??? I'm just wondering how wild she got