Do you care more about the friendship or your friend?

[AlexandMorgan]

So you are out and about on the road and u happen across your friend's partner out with another someone and by their body language and actions you know they are either fucking or done fucked one another.

What would you normally do when faced with a scenario like this?

Sorry BG

 

[Chicutie]

I normally stay out of situations like this. In my experience, if a person is cheating, normally the other party isn't totally clueless about it or they are simply ignoring all the signs. I have been that friend that has told a girlfriend that her man was cheating and it wasn't taken well.

So these days, I keep myself out of other people's business. If a friend asks my opinion, that's different, but volunteering information is something that I don't do.

 

[Eva Hornae]

I normally stay out of situations like this. In my experience, if a person is cheating, normally the other party isn't totally clueless about it or they are simply ignoring all the signs. I have been that friend that has told a girlfriend that her man was cheating and it wasn't taken well.

So these days, I keep myself out of other people's business. If a friend asks my opinion, that's different, but volunteering information is something that I don't do.

what she said.

 

[AlexandMorgan]

I can understand your point but what happens when your friend finds out that their partner was doing wrong and that you their close or closest friend knew and said nothing.

Also turn it around would u in that scenario want to know? Your telling them might make the difference in that they now may choose not to ignore it anymore or could be the difference between a deadly STD or a broken heart. (I know worst case scenario but hey.)

 

[LeroyDibiase]

I think it really depends on if your friend is a man or a woman. This may seem sexist but it's true, at least in experiences.

 

[AlexandMorgan]

Well it is true that sometimes we have been in situations where we know our friends are doing wrong and we ourselves might have been doing shady things. But the whole concept of having a close friend is looking out for them and helping them however you can.

Now it is not about being a reporter walking around with a camera looking for evidence or anything like that but genuinely coming across something which you can clearly see is wrong and inappropriate. Knowing within yourself what you would wanted done if the situation were reversed. But they are some of us who would prefer ourselves not to know if the shoe were on the other foot yes but in the current world we live in what we do not know can kill us.

Yeah you might have friends doing immoral things but your friends do reflect on who you are. And yes we all make mistakes because we are all human and imperfect but ultimately your mistakes help to shape you into the person that you become.

 

[TriniDiva]

well, ive been there and done that...if it happens again, ill do just what i did b4...im tellin !!! but its only with my closest friends and family.

my best friend and me din talk much for 3 months cause i told her stuff bout her shady baby daddy, but say wah...i remember when mines was cheatin and she knew and didnt tell me, it was on like boil corn..i cussed her like there was no tomorrow, she is my best friends and was suppose to have my back...but i wont do her that ...im tellin who vex lost and who upset puke

 

[Mo-Better]

I normally stay out of situations like this. In my experience, if a person is cheating, normally the other party isn't totally clueless about it or they are simply ignoring all the signs. I have been that friend that has told a girlfriend that her man was cheating and it wasn't taken well.

So these days, I keep myself out of other people's business. If a friend asks my opinion, that's different, but volunteering information is something that I don't do.

This is one of the stickiest scenarios in life. To tell or not to tell. I however have to go along with your response. It may not be the best way but its the safest way to maintain a valued friendship.

However I feel there should've been more options in the poll so I didn't answer it.

 

[SEXY_SCORPIO]

If you would have asked me this some years ago I would have told her. But, now I keep my mouth shut because the last time I tried to be a good friend it blew up in my face. So what I do now is I drop hints or I might take her to where I think he is.

 

[Iron]

I think that you should tell. It depends on how you word the situation. You might be wrong and mistaken. And that's not gonna turn out very well.

So like Sexy Scorpio said drop little hints or take 'em to where you think they might be.

I'd try to tell them in a really off hand and aloof manner.

Now if I were on the other end.

I would want some one to just come out and tell me everything they saw. I'am a cool and tactful person. I am not going to jump to conclusions. Not going to be a big fight.

As I progress through life becoming more educated and disciplined. The thought of cheating becomes more and more disgusting. If you're not happy with me come then talk to me or just leave and be with that other person don't be greedy and go behind my back. Be an adult and make a decision.

If she's doing all of the things with him that she does with me. Then have the nerve to turn around and put her nasty ass lips on me. No!

 

[Hellfish]

if it was me I would want to know if I'm being played. Its better to be told by a friend than to be laid astray for a prolong period of time.

 

[Noir]

I normally stay out of situations like this. In my experience, if a person is cheating, normally the other party isn't totally clueless about it or they are simply ignoring all the signs. I have been that friend that has told a girlfriend that her man was cheating and it wasn't taken well.

So these days, I keep myself out of other people's business. If a friend asks my opinion, that's different, but volunteering information is something that I don't do.

This is one of the stickiest scenarios in life. To tell or not to tell. I however have to go along with your response. It may not be the best way but its the safest way to maintain a valued friendship.

However I feel there should've been more options in the poll so I didn't answer it.

If you would have asked me this some years ago I would have told her. But, now I keep my mouth shut because the last time I tried to be a good friend it blew up in my face. So what I do now is I drop hints or I might take her to where I think he is.

CO-SIGN to all of the above.

1) It would depend if it was my closest friend or close family member vs. a friend I know from work, or socially. If so, I may be inclined to tell, but I would have to have strong evidence.

2) However, like Scorp said, it tends to blow up in your face. I knew a woman whose man was cheating on her, and seen by several people in spots. This woman kept believing the guy's versions of events and started fights with several people who was telling her about her man's philandering. Even though the evidence was right in her face, she took his side and stuck by him, alienating herself from everyone.

 

[MCP]

Had a situation like this a few years back. Was in a nightclub here in London and saw my friend's then boyfriend all over this woman. He did noticed me at the time. I was in two minds on how to approach my friend about this.

A few days later I decided to call her and let her know to 'keep a eye on her man'. She demanded then to know on what I saw, so I told her.

Funny thing about it was that during the convo, she also stated that her bf rang her to find out on whether I had called her since that night. She soon put two and two together.

I guess I would call that a guilty conscious.

 

[MzKittyDelicious]

Fuck that, tell me...

the only thing I will add is... it depends on how close of friends you are. If it's someone in my direct circle, I will tell her... if its a newbie friend who I am friends with through someone else... then imma stay out of it.


I had a relationship with this guy who I dated for 8 months. This chick that I thought I was friends with, he tried to holler at her. The dude and I broke up and a month later she reveals that he tried to get with her.

So I am like, "why didn't you tell me"... she says "well you know how it is when a chick is into a dude who really isn't into her... she tends to believe him" and I am like what the fuck???!!!

I am not one of those chicks that tells the details of my relationship to females however she knew him and I were together for 8 months.

So you mean to tell me I am good enough for you to come over my house and break bread with, I am good enough for you to ask to borrow money... but I am not good enough for you to tell me that my man was trying to get with you?!

Get the fuck outta here... needless to say I am no longer friends with her!

 

[bigirl]

You can refer to my thread Helping People = TROUBLE

 

[Pussy Krook]

It's relative to the situation