I think just about all of us have been there before.
Daughter spends last moments calling and texting dad for help
- Thread starter Ashy Larry
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I think just about all of us have been there before.
I'm guilty. I've been there also, many of us have.
Looking back on it I recognize the bitchassery in my ways and how dangerous it was.
Thinking I was in love could've got people hurt.
That's why I reject it so much when I see it in others and read stories like this.
What I hate about it so much is the programming.
We've been taught by Hollywood romance flicks and love songs to feel that way about women.
This idea of possession is preached as some form of romance, "I can't live without you baby". I hate that shit.
But it does exactly what you say, it hides the darker sides of our desires.
That's why now I understand why women reject dudes who are overtly expressive of their love and devotion to them.
Those men who are "too nice". It's not real and it's not natural. Because beneath it all is that dark side lurking if she ever left she'd be in danger.
So when dudes get all emotive like that it's like sending a danger signal to her that he's not well experienced with women or well balanced socially to deal with her. It be like fucking a virgin for the first time. If she gave him some pussy he'd be stuck to her like stank on shit and that's dangerous because that separation anxiety will kick in major, no telling what he will do.
People say these things to sound romantic but they never really examine what they are saying, it's like empty words.
No man should ever put himself that low to say something like that. No woman wants a man like that either, if you talk to women on a level they will admit as much.
RIP to Julia Martin.
I hear ya,
but ask anyone thats been married for 30 plus years if it was easy..
all my aunts uncles friends parents say the same thing...
you know if its love when yall still around after going through them trials.
especially if you have children..
too many of these young dudes are in love with the pussy and not the person.
because if they really loved the person they would want to see them happy with or without them...
It's cool, man. I'm not trying to bring in old bad feelings. But I do think it's positive to recognize the things you can't do anything about that causes us suffering.
I'm with you, bro. These things are not easy to deal with and even if parent raise their kids a certain way, we still can't predict that emotion that will send that son/daughter over the top.
Condolences to you, brother.
Appreciated
I'm really worried about these young kids and social media...
They just seem so OPEN and unable to cope with any type of adversity
this stuff is getting worse and worse.
Monogamy is not suppose to be an easy thing. But I think the poster @Mello Mello made some great points about about our conditioning of how people perceives love.
I just think it's very complicated. I'm 10 years in on my marriage at 32 years old. It's working well, but I also know people 30 years in marriage where it ends on some trivial shit that has built up over years.
So I'm not sure if it's the idea of monogamy or love that is confusing people. Probably a little of both. the idea of monogamy is misleading in itself, if a person is unsure what love is or how to love a person.
You are aware of what it takes and the sacrifices that are made. I think I am too. As well as others in thread. I just think some others will see it differently.
And approach it differently, but all in the context of what you mentioned.
I think this is an incredible post you made. Appreciate that feedback.
I don't think I can add anything to what you said.
It's getting bad with the adults as well (unless you were referring to kids as in people younger than you).
It's the coward in people and social media. To communicate with someone while looking at them is more than most can bare.
Having people look at me in my eyes when I talk with them is a demanding trait I have. But I also believe this is how we handled our problems. We can say things on social media and won't have to deal with the emotions consequence. A person is more than likely reserved in their words when confronted. This is not the case for everyone, but their are a lot of cowards that is cause a rift in humanity. It's possible it will get better after it hits its low point.
People generally don't have to deal with it now of days. Just saying to piss someone off and then go browse the Internet.
Losing that communication aspect is also losing the ability to read people; understand people. I tell people often I hope their day is going well or they look nice. Good energy will hopefully vibrate positive energy back.
Man, we've ALL been there. Any dude that says he hasn't wasn't really out here messing with women like that or they're one of those "I married my high school sweetheart type dudes".
I remember being all sad and shit, I was a freshman away in college... I think I even made a thread back then like a real emo ass nigga (Ok I KNOW I did
I hope that shit got lost after the FIRST server change) Stopped going to the gym and shit, my boy hit me with "NIGGA! It's been like a week, We're in fucking college! There's pussy EVERYWHERE! I'm coming downstairs to get you after dinner, we running laps and hitting the weight room again... stop being a BITCH" I tried to duck him that night and hit the pool to do laps, he showed up on some "You're pretending that bitch on the other end of the pool and will be there when you get there huh?" Ahh man, college, young love and all that funny shit.... good times man.
I'll just add there is something in us that produces the pain of loss similar to death of a family member when we break up with a spouse.
Somewhere in there we blame the other party for producing that pain and want to make them feel the same way we do.
I know it's not easy but I just question how much of it is real love and not just a desire to possess.
Man, we've ALL been there. Any dude that says he hasn't wasn't really out here messing with women like that or they're one of those "I married my high school sweetheart type dudes".
I remember being all sad and shit, I was a freshman away in college... I think I even made a thread back then like a real emo ass nigga (Ok I KNOW I did
Right. My homie was their for me the same your homie was their for you. He could have just said "I can't be around this sad ass nigga acting like this." Lol.
But shit, we live and learn and just maybe this bitchass dude this killed this young lady could have been talk to. But we never really know.
I have a habit of not checking texts or my caller ID for days sometimes. But that's mainly because most of the people that call me don't be talking about shit.
This story made me think....but its not likely to make me start answering my phone.
I know for a fact that I can love hard. Im selfish with the people that I love ( don't wanna share them w/ others). Im very protective. Because if that I purposely turn on my "I don't give fuck switch" to protect myself.
It was worse when i was younger. But Ive gained major (emotional) control over the years via being observant of myself. With that being stated.... I understand that everyone ain't built like me. A LA the guy who jumped out that window.
That was some pssy shit that he did....but I understand that some people are just forever weak.
This story made me think....but its not likely to make me start answering my phone.
I know for a fact that I can love hard. Im selfish with the people that I love ( don't wanna share them w/ others). Im very protective. Because if that I purposely turn on my "I don't give fuck switch" to protect myself.
It was worse when i was younger. But Ive gained major (emotional) control over the years via being observant of myself. With that being stated.... I understand that everyone ain't built like me. A LA the guy who jumped out that window.
That was some pssy shit that he did....but I understand that some people are just forever weak.
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Man my first breakup had me listening to Toni Braxtons first album, door locked with headphones on, looking at the ceiling numb as fuck... That when you know it hurt when you don't feel shit but emptiness...
Pops wasn't hearing it, told me I had til the weekend to put it behind me or he was gonna call up uncle Robert and they were go a have a roasting session... 
Concur.
Did I miss his name in the story? He went out like a bitch; his peoples have to suffer if he takes mine. Fuck that. The funeral notice will be published; guess who will be there?
RIP to this sista.
Man, we've ALL been there. Any dude that says he hasn't wasn't really out here messing with women like that or they're one of those "I married my high school sweetheart type dudes".
I remember being all sad and shit, I was a freshman away in college... I think I even made a thread back then like a real emo ass nigga (Ok I KNOW I did
I remember in high school I was looking sick, making myself sick, couped up in my room sulking over a break-up I had. My mom knew what it was but I tried to deny it. I was listening to Carl Thomas, "I Wish" while crying silently in my pillow.
My lil bitchass heart was broken. Lil hoe ass feelings I had. lol
She said, "It wasn't real love, it was just puppy love". I bout socced that bitch in the face for saying that to me. But she was right.
Then she started fucking with my friends and that snapped me out of it real quick, then it went from I'm sad to I want revenge. Let me try and fuck her friends now.
You aint lying but now that I think about it I didnt even cry, I went through
something worse, I had that pain in my heart like I was a kid and saw my dog
get run over by a car...lol...
I couldnt even listen to any upbeat music for months.... the fucked up shit now that I think about it, I passed so much coochie thinkin about her, I had a chick I used to talk to...
and my homies were like you aint hit that yet, and I was like nah she is my friend and I dont
want to ruin what we have... and that friend was giving me all types of signs I didnt see..
it wasnt till years later, she was telling me how stupid I was and how much she wanted to be more than friends....
but I love that learning experience because it taught me early on how to enjoy my own company and not needing to handcuff a chick to complete me...
Man, I would hate to be one of the cats in his circle (assuming he even has friends.) So many possibilities would be running through my mind about how I could have possibly helped/prevented this, something as simple as offering to pick up the ring because you know he's still going through it over her.
I went to elementary school with a cat that pulled something similar. He shot his girl, her mother AND her grandmother
he was cool, kinda drifted apart but would always speak when we saw each other. His mom passed when we were in maybe the 11th grade and he was just never the same.RIP to this sista.
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Letting her know what will happen if she tries to leave?
My mom knew what it was but I tried to deny it. I was listening to Carl Thomas, "I Wish" while crying silently in my pillow.
My lil bitchass heart was broken. Lil hoe ass feelings I had. lol
She said, "It wasn't real love, it was just puppy love". I bout socced that bitch in the face for saying that to me. But she was right.
Then she started fucking with my friends and that snapped me out of it real quick, then it went from I'm sad to I want revenge. Let me try and fuck her friends now.
FACTSSSSS!!! I'm listening to Carl Thomas, Case "I'm missing you" and Ginuwine "differences" going on long ass fake introspective walks. I remember begging Moms' for a ticket home because I thought I just HAD to see shorty Ahhhh man, you cats are bringing back funny ass memories.
If I could go back for just 1 year and capitalize on all the easy ass I passed up behind that "friend" shit...
Y'all kats got me dyin over hear listening to your stories
Good building in a thread from a tragic story.
Good building in a thread from a tragic story.
Alessandro de' Medici
Banned
I hope he gets the help he needs. A friend lost her grandma, Dad and Mom and now aunt all within 3 yrs of each other. She keeps reading notes, looking at photos reliving the heartbreak.
Keep all phones on you at all times my daughter and sons are out of time. Fuck no. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck no. If they were calling me and i don't call them. Jeez. That poor guySuch tragedy.
Both sides of the family suffers. Sometime we never know the full extent of someone's crazy until it's too late.
You right. It was a friend. Damn.
RIP to the young sister.
As fucked up as the scenario is, it's probably best the father missed those calls because to hear someone you love dying let alone your own daughter over the phone would haunt me forever.
Yea I feel ya. That's why I say these kids are "too" emotional... I coach young black boys and you can tell the difference between kids that grow up in two parent household and ones with single parents. (Mothers, not saying single parenting is bad its more of a circumstantial observation) The ones with single parents take on the emotional energy that a great amount of women posses because that's all they see and know. This affects them as they get older.
All they seen their whole life is emotional energy to solve problems.
Yes men can become emotional and it is good to be moved into an emotional state. But when you "act" off of pure emotions as a man, the outcome is usually negative.
You have to train and condition yourself to know when you are about to act off emotions. THIS is what us fathers have to do our best at when raising our sons. Teach them about the concept of emotions and logic. This will deal with a lot of the bullshit that's affecting our black youth.
Doubt if his intention knowing she was truly dying, was to hang up the phone. She may been playing a pranks on her father. I don't know there relationship status. But even if he could've answer, there was nothing he could do about it. He's no doctor, she called the ambulance and still died. Rest in peace to the young lady.
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