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Could you try 'The Naked Man' on a date? How I Met Your Mother -Funny Shit

went out with this pretty bitch one time. she had major attitude but i wanted to smash bad - something told me i could kinda mind-bully her into giving up the pussy. she's that type of pretty bitch that doesn't wear a thong - but a G-STRING. big difference. pussy connoisseurs know what i speak of.

anyway took her back to the crib - which is rare because jumpoffs never come back to the batcave.

conversation is stunted. we watching tv, drinking wine or whatever and it looks like the date is falling apart. so i'm like fuck it and just whip my shit out - pause. right next to her on the couch and don't say shit. she sees what a nigga working with - pause. she looks at me and says, "I can't believe you just did that!" I motion with my head like, "I'm saying..."

One thing leads to another and i'm pounding her shit out doggie in front of this mirror i got while telling the bitch to look at me in the mirror - pause.

long story short - bitches respond to strength. they don't want to give up the pussy - they want you to take it. if you're too weak to take pussy when it's offered - how can you do anything else in life? btw - a bitch coming back to your crib with you is offering the pussy.
 
HAD THIS GIRL OVER FOR A MOVIE NIGHT AND DIDN'T SMASH. WASN'T ON MY MIND BUT I WONDER IF SHE NOW THINKS I AM TOO WEAK.:smh:
 
4ce of n8ur said:
went out with this pretty bitch one time. she had major attitude but i wanted to smash bad - something told me i could kinda mind-bully her into giving up the pussy. she's that type of pretty bitch that doesn't wear a thong - but a G-STRING. big difference. pussy connoisseurs know what i speak of.

anyway took her back to the crib - which is rare because jumpoffs never come back to the batcave.

conversation is stunted. we watching tv, drinking wine or whatever and it looks like the date is falling apart. so i'm like fuck it and just whip my shit out - pause. right next to her on the couch and don't say shit. she sees what a nigga working with - pause. she looks at me and says, "I can't believe you just did that!" I motion with my head like, "I'm saying..."

One thing leads to another and i'm pounding her shit out doggie in front of this mirror i got while telling the bitch to look at me in the mirror - pause.

long story short - bitches respond to strength. they don't want to give up the pussy - they want you to take it. if you're too weak to take pussy when it's offered - how can you do anything else in life? btw - a bitch coming back to your crib with you is offering the pussy.
Click to expand...
:eek::D
No truer words have ever been spoken...
 
:lol: Wow! I had some dude pull this shit on me!!

In my single college days, I met this dude on campus. He worked in the athletic department, he was sexy. We went on a very nice date one night. We get back to his place and I was sitting on the couch watching TV. He went in the other room and came back out with his shirt off! Body was nice as hell, I started getting moist, I'm not going to lie.

However, I didn't want to fuck on the first date, I don't roll that way, but I did like him. He sat on the couch next to me and put his head on my lap. I was horny as hell. He asked me to rub his back. I did and kept watching television, then I told him I needed to go home.

He took me home, I called him twice after that and he never called back. :hmm: That's too bad, because he probably would have gotten it on our second or third date. He was mad sexy.

Damn, I wonder where he is today? :lol:
 
Leroy Soup Nutz said:
I'll check it out...oh and I suggest niggas who wanna attempt this shit do it in their own house because you could find yourself in handcuffs being led to a cop car naked if you try this anywhere else... :lol::smh:
Click to expand...

I hear u!
But! I wouldn't even try that dumb shit even in my own home.
Nigga!
I'm not desperate!
:eek:
 
Lola said:
:lol: Wow! I had some dude pull this shit on me!!

In my single college days, I met this dude on campus. He worked in the athletic department, he was sexy. We went on a very nice date one night. We get back to his place and I was sitting on the couch watching TV. He went in the other room and came back out with his shirt off! Body was nice as hell, I started getting moist, I'm not going to lie.

However, I didn't want to fuck on the first date, I don't roll that way, but I did like him. He sat on the couch next to me and put his head on my lap. I was horny as hell. He asked me to rub his back. I did and kept watching television, then I told him I needed to go home.

He took me home, I called him twice after that and he never called back. :hmm: That's too bad, because he probably would have gotten it on our second or third date. He was mad sexy.

Damn, I wonder where he is today? :lol:
Click to expand...
stupid piece of shit im glad that man had better sense.
 
Episode added:
Season 4, Episode 21: The Three Days Rule
When Ted violates the "three days rule" by continually texting with a girl he's just met, Barney and Marshall retaliate by impersonating her.
 
Episode added:
Season 4, Episode 22: Right Place Right Time
After Ted runs into Stella, he talks to his future kids about how being in the right place at the right time can impact a person's life. Meanwhile, Barney celebrates his 200th female conquest.
 
Episode added:
Season 4, Episode 23: As Fast As She Can
Ted is trying to find a new job, and when an old acquaintance tries to help nothing goes as planned. Barney tries to smooth talk his way out of a ticket.
 
Episode added:
The Leap
Season 4, Episode 24
Season Finale
As his 31st birthday nears, an all-nighter to try to get business has Ted realizing he may need to pursue another career than architecture. Meanwhile, Marshall tries to get him up to a rooftop surprise party.
 
Season 5

The new season started and I am back to bringing you more of one of my favorite shows.

Season_5_How_I_met_your_mother.jpg


Definitions
Season 5, Episode 1
Robin and Barney resist their friends' pressure that they should have "the talk" about their relationship. Meanwhile, a panicky Ted, about to face his first college class, decides he must keep control of his students by releasing his "inner douche", a tactic that backfires miserably, until.... Ted learns something about the mother.

http://rapidshare.com/files/283925066/How.I.Met.Your.Mother.S05E01.HDTV.XviD-NoTV.rar
 
How I Met Your Mother is one of the funniest shows on tv right now. Other than sports, all I watch is that, and House, The Office, and Two and a Half Men​
 
The Sexless Innkeeper
Season 5, Episode 4
Marshall and Lily want to hook up with Barney and Robin for double-dating and fun, but their desperate eagerness to please is a huge turn-off. Meanwhile, when a succession of girls come to his apartment and immediately fall asleep, Ted is bummed to learn he is a "Sexless Innkeeper" whose "dates" are only interested in a comfy place to crash.

http://rapidshare.com/files/292463947/How.I.Met.Your.Mother.S05E04.HDTV.XviD-2HD.6e24.rar
 
The Window
Season 5, Episode 10
Ted?s neighbor Maggie, that he?s wanted to date for years, has finally broken up with her boyfriend, putting her back on the market. A letter to himself has Marshall trying to live up to it.

http://rapidshare.com/files/321872589/How.I.Met.Your.Mother.S05E10.The.Window.HDTV.XviD-FQM.rar


Last Cigarette Ever
Season 5, Episode 11
The gang tries to kick the smoking habit. Meanwhile, Robin deals with her new co-anchor at Channel 1.

http://rapidshare.com/files/3218726....S05E11.Last.Cigarette.Ever.HDTV.XviD-FQM.rar
 
Sorry. The Maxtor HD I bought that had seasons 1-4 on it died, taking that and 400GB of porn and music with it. Sorry. Never buy Maxtor. They are pieces of shit. Glad to see it is gonna stay on.
 
Last edited:
playahaitian said:
www.cbr.com

A Disturbing How I Met Your Mother Theory Completely Changes the Disappointing Finale

After a disappointing ending, HIMYM fans have tried desperately to erase the finale. But one fan might have justified it by breaking Ted.
www.cbr.com www.cbr.com

:eek2:
Click to expand...
Dude, you did not just dredge up a thread from 2008

While HIMYM got dumb and I abandoned it somewhere in season 7 (I think), the early episodes were funny, including Slapsgiving, The Naked Man, The Hot/Crazy Scale and many others

Still, I think it was unnecessary to dig this up after 13 years. But my favorite...let's go to the mall

 

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