Make a Contribution to Remove NSFW Ads

Could you date someone who was celibate?

Chicutie

Chicutie

~Brown Suga~
BGOL Investor
I met this guy a while ago, a friend of one of my sisters. And he seemed almost perfect. We really clicked. He had a great personality, treated me nice, had God in his life, etc. And then he tells me he's celibate. He told me that he decided he wanted to wait until he got married to have sex again because he felt like when he slept with someone, he immediately lost interest. He said he wasn't opposed to kissing and other intimate things. . . but he didn't want to have sex. After I found that out. . I lost interest in him.. . And maybe it was wrong :smh: but, I knew that I could never make it in a long term relationship without sex. And maybe he would have eventually given in to temptation, but I didn't want to compromise what he was trying to do. . .

So my question is, could you date someone who was celibate?
 
I couldnt, I like sex too much. I respect anybody that is celibate but its something I dont wanna do. I can only go so long without sex and I start losing it.​
 
:smh: It's unfortunate, but for the very same reasons you mentioned, I couldn't do it. However, unlike you I would try to break that armor immediately as if it were a challenge. These days, it isn't too hard to coax a woman out of her panties no matter how much of a front she puts up.
 
:smh: ... maybe for a month or 2 ...but not for too long .....and she would have to be a super Dime for me to wait that 2 months in the first place
 
I respect anyone's right to do what they want to.

But I am just going to say it and you can hate me later....

HELL NO

:lol::lol::lol:
 
Chicutie said:
I met this guy a while ago, a friend of one of my sisters. And he seemed almost perfect. We really clicked. He had a great personality, treated me nice, had God in his life, etc. And then he tells me he's celibate. He told me that he decided he wanted to wait until he got married to have sex again because he felt like when he slept with someone, he immediately lost interest. He said he wasn't opposed to kissing and other intimate things. . . but he didn't want to have sex. After I found that out. . I lost interest in him.. . And maybe it was wrong :smh: but, I knew that I could never make it in a long term relationship without sex. And maybe he would have eventually given in to temptation, but I didn't want to compromise what he was trying to do. . .

So my question is, could you date someone who was celibate?
Click to expand...


I could understand if the person I met stated that she was celibate because she did not want to have sex until she was in a committed relationship, there was a true connection, "love", and did not want to just have random, emotionless "3rd date" sex, etc.

If she just wanted to wait until she was married, I could respect that, but it would be a difficult decision whether to continue dating her, unless I really felt that marriage was a true possibility. While not the most important aspect of a relationship, the sexual connection between two people is a major part of an relationship, and sexual compatibility should be known/assessed by both parties before marriage. Yes, things could be worked out and learned between the couple, but you should know whether the two of you are even capable of doing this BEFORE marriage.

However, I think the larger issue is why he loses interest with someone after having sex with them, and more importantly, why did he think that if he waited until being maried to have sex that he would not then lose interest anyway?
 
Last edited:
Chicutie said:
And maybe it was wrong :smh: but, I knew that I could never make it in a long term relationship without sex. And maybe he would have eventually given in to temptation, but I didn't want to compromise what he was trying to do. . .
Click to expand...

You did the right thing for YOU Cutie just like he is choosing to do the right thing for him.

AristotlesOwn said:
These days, it isn't too hard to coax a woman out of her panties no matter how much of a front she puts up.
Click to expand...

I'm mad at you! :lol:

black again said:
I'll make this short..:smh:
Click to expand...
:lol:

There are different forms of celibacy. Is this person completely celibate???? - No masturbation, no porn, no phone sex , no web cam, no hand jobs, no toys, NOTHING- uhhhhh NO. :smh: I would explode.

No intercourse- sure I could go along with that for a minute. I'm partially celibate now mainly because I'm choosing not to do the fuck buddy thing and there's nobody I'm ready to commit to a serious relationship with after my break-up.

However, I would NOT/ NO NEVER NO marry someone without having sex with him first. Sex and my particular kinks are way too important to me not to know what kind of intimate life I'm going to have with my future to be.

I respect his resolve though. I was celibate on a whole spiritual journey once. It sucked and I was basically more irritated than enlightened. I guess I needed to meditate more :)
 
Last edited:
Izayoi said:
There are different forms of celibacy. Is this person completely celibate???? - No masturbation, no porn, no phone sex , no web cam, no hand jobs, no toys, NOTHING- uhhhhh NO. :smh: I would explode.

No intercourse- sure I could go along with that for a minute. I'm partially celibate now mainly because I'm choosing not to do the fuck buddy thing and there's nobody I'm ready to commit to a serious relationship with after my break-up.

However, I would NOT/ NO NEVER NO marry someone without having sex with them first. Sex and my particular kinks are way too important to me not to know what kind of intimate life I'm going to have with my future to be.

I respect his resolve though. I was celibate on a whole spiritual journey once. It sucked and I was basically more irritated than enlightened. I guess I needed to meditate more :)
Click to expand...

6qe2dsm.jpg

:lol::lol:

To answer the OP, I respect her grind, or lack thereof, but no. I find that most vows of celibacy are a) forced, i.e. no choice and/or b) based on some ridiculous notion of sanctificity(yeah I made it up). She'd have to have a good damn reason for being celibate and even then, she'd better suck the chrome off a '67 Chevy.

That said, I think that sex is becoming more and more a substantial factor in relationships, whether or not that is good or bad remains to be seen, but you're going to have an increase in these "rebellious, anti-mainstream" behaviors. It's not that I got to Incredible Hulk 3 or 4 times a day, e'eryday, but when I wanna get with the getdown, it needs to be got.
 
Noir said:
However, I think the larger issue is why he loses interest with someone after having sex with them, and more importantly, why did he think that if he waited until being maried to have sex that he would not then lose interest anyway?
Click to expand...

dude...churchhhh...I was wondering how long it would take for the real issue to be surfaced.
 
Last edited:
I see chicutie's teaser pics in that sticky thread.Yall need to stop beat around the bush and say what exactly is this guy issue.

He is gay.
 
Guess I'll be the lone voice to say yes, I'd date a celibate woman. I've done 3somes, been to (but not participated) in orgies, worked in porno. In my 20's, I saw all that shit and realized that most of it is just empty w/o some real connection.

I'd rather not have sex but develop a real connection on some other shit at this point than have some more meaningless coital play. That's just me. Hell, I'm on BGOL mostly for the music and conversation ;)

Real talk.
 
Chicutie said:
I met this guy a while ago, a friend of one of my sisters. And he seemed almost perfect. We really clicked. He had a great personality, treated me nice, had God in his life, etc. And then he tells me he's celibate. He told me that he decided he wanted to wait until he got married to have sex again because he felt like when he slept with someone, he immediately lost interest. He said he wasn't opposed to kissing and other intimate things. . . but he didn't want to have sex. After I found that out. . I lost interest in him.. . And maybe it was wrong :smh: but, I knew that I could never make it in a long term relationship without sex. And maybe he would have eventually given in to temptation, but I didn't want to compromise what he was trying to do. . .

So my question is, could you date someone who was celibate?
Click to expand...

That nigga was lying! :lol:

I've actually had friends of mine pull that old "celibacy" okey-doke on chicks to make them feel safe and make them want to try and have sex with them.You'd be surprised how many chicks fall for that line.

As for being with a truly celibate woman, hell to the naw, I gots to have mine! :dance:
 
I would.



I'am patient.



Sex isn't that important. I look at it as something thats recreational. It shouldn't be so serious. I can live without it if i really like her.
 
Izayoi said:
I'm mad at you! :lol:
Click to expand...

You and I both know that I speak the truth. I'm sure that you have girlfriends who would automatically melt and drop the panties if the right man whispered somethin erotic in their ear.

Izayoi said:
There are different forms of celibacy. Is this person completely celibate???? - No masturbation, no porn, no phone sex , no web cam, no hand jobs, no toys, NOTHING- uhhhhh NO. :smh: I would explode.
Click to expand...

So basically, no foreplay :lol: That WOULD be torture.

Izayoi said:
However, I would NOT/ NO NEVER NO marry someone without having sex with him first. Sex and my particular kinks are way too important to me not to know what kind of intimate life I'm going to have with my future to be.
Click to expand...

:yes::yes:

Izayoi said:
I guess I needed to meditate more :)
Click to expand...

:yes::yes: probably every hour on the hour during dissertation research
 
sakinnuso said:
Guess I'll be the lone voice to say yes, I'd date a celibate woman. I've done 3somes, been to (but not participated) in orgies, worked in porno. In my 20's, I saw all that shit and realized that most of it is just empty w/o some real connection.

I'd rather not have sex but develop a real connection on some other shit at this point than have some more meaningless coital play. That's just me. Hell, I'm on BGOL mostly for the music and conversation ;)

Real talk.
Click to expand...

Iron said:
I would.



I'am patient.



Sex isn't that important. I look at it as something thats recreational. It shouldn't be so serious. I can live without it if i really like her.
Click to expand...

:roflmao:
:roflmao::roflmao:
:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:

YEAH OK
 
Izayoi said:
There are different forms of celibacy. Is this person completely celibate???? - No masturbation, no porn, no phone sex , no web cam, no hand jobs, no toys, NOTHING- uhhhhh NO. :smh: I would explode.

No intercourse- sure I could go along with that for a minute. I'm partially celibate now mainly because I'm choosing not to do the fuck buddy thing and there's nobody I'm ready to commit to a serious relationship with after my break-up.

However, I would NOT/ NO NEVER NO marry someone without having sex with him first. Sex and my particular kinks are way too important to me not to know what kind of intimate life I'm going to have with my future to be.

I respect his resolve though. I was celibate on a whole spiritual journey once. It sucked and I was basically more irritated than enlightened. I guess I needed to meditate more :)
Click to expand...

Yes.. He claims to be completely celibate. And if you knew him, you would believe it. Because he constantly busy, 24 hours a day. Seriously, a day with him is like a workout. He keeps himself so occupied, I guess to keep his mind off it, but that would never work for me. I respected what he was trying to do. . and he was worth investing time in.. . but with the celibacy thing. I just wasn't ready.

Noir said:
I could understand if the person I met stated that she was celibate because she did not want to have sex until she was in a committed relationship, there was a true connection, "love", and did not want to just have random, emotionless "3rd date" sex, etc.

If she just wanted to wait until she was married, I could respect that, but it would be a difficult decision whether to continue dating her, unless I really felt that marriage was a true possibility. While not the most important aspect of a relationship, the sexual connection between two people is a major part of an relationship, and sexual compatibility should be known/assessed by both parties before marriage. Yes, things could be worked out and learned between the couple, but you should know whether the two of you are even capable of doing this BEFORE marriage.

However, I think the larger issue is why he loses interest with someone after having sex with them, and more importantly, why did he think that if he waited until being maried to have sex that he would not then lose interest anyway?
Click to expand...

Yes. . That scared me! That is the whole reason why I didn't push the issue about sex. Bc I was thinking ok. . so I might talk him into sex one night. . . and he'd probably never talk to me again. Me and him are still friends. . nothing serious anymore, we still talk. . . But I still haven't quite figured him out yet.
 
Now that I've practiced celibacy twice in my life, before I got sick and currently. I could.

Beforehand I would have easily said no.
 
I would have no problem with it. Especially if he let me know in the beginning. A celibate man would be a breath of fresh of air. I would automatically know that when he called it wasn't because he wanted some.
 
Celibacy sucks ass. Don't ask me how i know?:hmm:

Celibacy or as i prefer abstinence in between relationships to me makes sense because sex complicates things. If you are dating a chick and aint feeling her it is easier to walk away if she did not have anything invested in the relationship aka sex.

Once a woman has had sex with you if u try to walk away because you no longer interested the "You Used Me" chorus starts up and all of her friends will join in and label you a bastard, among other things.:smh:

Disease is rampant and condoms burst too damn much :smh: for me to be in the casual sex game. Fuck buddies may work short term but eventually someone catches feelings.

So i would rather do without and wake up with no worries than be fucking a woman that my heart aint with just to scratch an itch.:yes:
 
no. i could be friends and hang out with someone celibate but if we are not sexually involved then it is not dating, at least to me its not.
 
she is currently 38 and hasnt had sex in 9 years.

She was smart enough to keep it to herself for 2 months before casually saying it as she walked out the room. There were a couple of other things that were already an issue for me but that one put things over the limit. My 2 biggest issues were that 1.) It would be at least 2 years before marriage if it was to go that route, 2.) I didnt want to be the one that "got it" (in case she decided it was time or that she no longer wanted to wait) after 9 years and things not work out.

answer: no
 
Iron said:
I would.



I'am patient.



Sex isn't that important. I look at it as something thats recreational. It shouldn't be so serious. I can live without it if i really like her.
Click to expand...
:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
Spoken like a man that spends alot of time alone watching porm and jacking off
 
Chicutie said:
I met this guy a while ago, a friend of one of my sisters. And he seemed almost perfect. We really clicked. He had a great personality, treated me nice, had God in his life, etc. And then he tells me he's celibate. He told me that he decided he wanted to wait until he got married to have sex again because he felt like when he slept with someone, he immediately lost interest. He said he wasn't opposed to kissing and other intimate things. . . but he didn't want to have sex. After I found that out. . I lost interest in him.. . And maybe it was wrong :smh: but, I knew that I could never make it in a long term relationship without sex. And maybe he would have eventually given in to temptation, but I didn't want to compromise what he was trying to do. . .

So my question is, could you date someone who was celibate?
Click to expand...

This is not a man that you would want to date or have anything to do with. That nigga is very bitch-like. Obviously he's going through some "struggles" that you don't want any part of.
This dude has two major strikes against him: He's into church and he's struggling with something.
 
swiftandsilent said:
YEAH OK
Click to expand...

Jamaicanlonghood said:
:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
Spoken like a man that spends alot of time alone watching porm and jacking off
Click to expand...

And you sound like you've never had any pussy before.

:hmm: See, Sex is fun it's enjoyable but it's not that important to me. To me sex doesn't define a romantic relationship. If i liked the girl then i wouldn't mind just spending time with her. Of course I would'nt agree with whole celibacy I'd want a blow job or something. But i wouldn't be hard pressed for sex.

Me and my girl used to have genuine arguments about sex she had a huge sex drive. She was wearing me out. we had too much sex and i was losing interest. Sex is really overrated i'd rather be spending that time doing something that stimulates my mind and not my penis. It's not difficult to go without sex.
 
Last edited:
I wouldn't mind someone who didn't want to rush into sex and wanting to build a connection first, because thats what you SHOULD do! But I could not be with someone who specifically said I'm not having sex until this point in time. I am comfortable in my sexuality and want to share that with someone I'm in a relationship with. And I'll be damned if I wait until marriage to try out the goods :smh::smh::smh: NOPE!!!
 
Iron said:

Me and my girl used to have genuine arguments about sex she had a huge sex drive. She was wearing me out. we had too much sex and i was losing interest. Sex is really overrated i'd rather be spending that time doing something that stimulates my mind and not my penis. It's not difficult to go without sex.
Click to expand...

you sound like my ex, the above is the exact reason he is my ex.
 
Iron said:
And you sound like you've never had any pussy
Click to expand...

im not trying to get into a back and fourth online fight with you dude ....but i have a daughter ...and i grew up in Jamaica ........i have been getting girls naked since my age was a single number ...i turned 31 in september ..and i still cant see myself being wore out by sex .....the things you saying just dont sound true to me ...or should i say i dont see things the way you do ...dont get me wrong im not saying if the girl aint worth it i wouldn't wait till she is comfortable enough to have sex with me (in my expierience it never take longer than a month or 2 for that to happen) im just saying that i dont go for that wait till we get married talk ...so i wouldn't waste her time or mine
 

Make a Contribution to Remove NSFW Ads
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top