Women should support men that show promise and the will to protect and provide for them (the women) early on. Women will reap the benefits of that mans success. Seeking a hypergamous relationship or dating a man for looks is a masculine way of thinking for a woman. It often fails.
What you are really asking him is to be the bigger person because other "minorities" dont see themselves as minorities. They see themselves better than blacks. They only want to be minorities when it benefits them.
no, what I am telling him is to not fall victim to the okie doke originated by caucausians in power that worked at maintaining power through the dividing of the people. black people in particular (light vs. dark) and against other minorities in general.
It's like her husband and friend was saying, "Your one of us now just pretend your not Asian and laugh with us." They just don't know much about racial issues because they don't have to deal with them.
I wonder how much of her Chinese cultural identity did she share with them before hand? I'll speculate little to none by her reaction here. Shit was all good as long as nobody reminded her she was Asian.