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A buddy needs to pass a PISS TEST. Any advice?

BitchI'llKillYa

BitchI'llKillYa

Rising Star
BGOL Investor
A buddy has the opportunity of a lifetime... he's been with the same company for years, but the new gig came out of nowhere.

He needs to pass a piss test in 3 days

He used weeds pretty consistently..

What have you all done to piss clean?
 
lol he is pretty fucked, if he smokes daily,

and depending on his weight and the potency of the herb..

he gonna need at least 1 - 3 months to get it all out.

his only hope is to dilute his urine with a lot of water before the test..

I know one guy that diluted his urine so much they needed to test him again, but they decided not to and let him through. trust me that is some rare shit....


his best bet is to try to delay it as long as possible, drink a lot of water and do a lot of sweating..

if he carries a lot of body fat, things are not lookin to good..

he may have to get one of those fake urine things that come with a fake penis and a heating pad..
 
He has a couple options.
Buy a cleanse drink
They also sell a mini heater so he can have someone else piss for him and hide it under his clothes.
 
This is probably one of the most googled topics online. But I'll humor your post because you post a lot of ass. Your friend needs, a small bottle that will hold about 4oz. He needs clean piss from someone he knows and a digital thermometer. Heat the shit up to about 102. Tape the bottle under your nuts, tape the digital thermometer down there too. When he drops the sample, the temp of the urine should be no lower than 96 and no higher than 100. Good luck.
 
I'm old school........Golden seal has never let me down

3-days? day one take two in the morning and drink as much water as you can stand take another two that evening and drink water and beer till you are pissing like a race horse

next two days drink water water water and beer beer beer

go pass your piss test..


if it's a hair follicle test your are screwed LOL
 
drowzie said:
Drop some bleach in the urine sample...it worked for my homie
Click to expand...
28jjqmv.jpg
 
yaBoi said:
I'm old school........Golden seal has never let me down

3-days? day one take two in the morning and drink as much water as you can stand take another two that evening and drink water and beer till you are pissing like a race horse

next two days drink water water water and beer beer beer

go pass your piss test..


if it's a hair follicle test your are screwed LOL
Click to expand...

My cousins swear by golden seal
 
My advice?
Decline taking the position.
If tested; and it shows he's a weed user, then the word is permanently out on him in that organization.
Management probably will not make another offer to him for upward mobility/advancement in the future.
And if this is a company that has a "zero tolerance" policy with regard to marijuana use, then he's truly screwed.

Regardless of the outcome, he has to look on this as a learning experience (concerning his continued use of weed) and his job retention/future earning potential.
Either way I wish him all the best... :dunno:
 
Mrfreddygoodbud said:
lol he is pretty fucked, if he smokes daily,

and depending on his weight and the potency of the herb..

he gonna need at least 1 - 3 months to get it all out.

his only hope is to dilute his urine with a lot of water before the test..

I know one guy that diluted his urine so much they needed to test him again, but they decided not to and let him through. trust me that is some rare shit....


his best bet is to try to delay it as long as possible, drink a lot of water and do a lot of sweating..

if he carries a lot of body fat, things are not lookin to good..

he may have to get one of those fake urine things that come with a fake penis and a heating pad..
Click to expand...

YNQrL.gif
 
he needs something that will mask it for 6 to 8 hours..go to a smoke shop and tell them your situation..and they'll know what to give him...
 
CptMARVEL said:
My advice?
Decline taking the position.
If tested; and it shows he's a weed user, then the word is permanently out on him in that organization.
Management probably will not make another offer to him for upward mobility/advancement in the future.
And if this is a company that has a "zero tolerance" policy with regard to marijuana use, then he's truly screwed.

Regardless of the outcome, he has to look on this as a learning experience (concerning his continued use of weed) and his job retention/future earning potential.
Either way I wish him all the best... :dunno:
Click to expand...
Its a VP role... he can't turn it down... bridges burn
 
Many years ago I'd heard about using antibiotics to distort the tests. I tried it for myself about a year later. They never found the weed in my urine but the tylenol 3 that I took for my injury surely showed up. They let that go though. Whew
 
i guess it's easier for women cause a chick told me once she slipped a pill bottle up her pussy and kept it warm....

still the thought though..... :lol::lol::lol:
 
BGLR1212000 said:
This is probably one of the most googled topics online. But I'll humor your post because you post a lot of ass. Your friend needs, a small bottle that will hold about 4oz. He needs clean piss from someone he knows and a digital thermometer. Heat the shit up to about 102. Tape the bottle under your nuts, tape the digital thermometer down there too. When he drops the sample, the temp of the urine should be no lower than 96 and no higher than 100. Good luck.
Click to expand...
Of course I hit google... but it's so much bullshit and folks trying to push their product.

Thanks for the advice
 
Nigga shit because he knew this was coming so why smoke weed?

weed or a job?dumbass you need a job to buy the weed so why not stop for a month.

Anyways,I hear that drinking a gallon of water helps or he better get someone to piss in a bottle and take that.
Quit before he even get's hired ....simplest rout
 
Synthetix5. Fake pee. Shit was $20 out the door. Saved me my fucking job.

Punk ass lil cac caused a chain reaction accident. I was the 4th and last car hit. So long story short i was in a company truck and had to take a drug test and that shit worked. I'm at work typing this now my nigga. So I'd go with that. Not some what i heard somebody say they tried that worked.

Shit even comes w the lil hand warmer to stick to it and keep it warm and and a temp gauge

Oh and it only takes 10 secs in the microwave to get you right
 
Last edited:
xxironxx said:
Synthetix5. Fake pee. Shit was $20 out the door. Saved me my fucking job.

Punk ass lil cac caused a chain reaction accident. I was the 4th and last car hit. So long story short i was in a company truck and had to take a drug test and that shit worked. I'm at work typing this now my nigga. So I'd go with that. Not some what i heard somebody say they tried that worked.

Shit even comes w the lil hand warmer to stick to it and keep it and and a temp gauge
Click to expand...
so smokers should keep some of that shit on the ready...just in case
 
34real said:
Nigga shit because he knew this was coming so why smoke weed?

weed or a job?dumbass you need a job to buy the weed so why not stop for a month.

Anyways,I hear that drinking a gallon of water helps or he better get someone to piss in a bottle and take that.
Quit before he even get's hired ....simplest rout
Click to expand...
Again he didn't know. This was a fluke deal.

I hooked him up with a vendor I use in the DFW area. They hit it off and he got a call Monday, when the VP decided not return from his spring break with his grandkids.
 
xxironxx said:
Synthetix5. Fake pee. Shit was $20 out the door. Saved me my fucking job.

Punk ass lil cac caused a chain reaction accident. I was the 4th and last car hit. So long story short i was in a company truck and had to take a drug test and that shit worked. I'm at work typing this now my nigga. So I'd go with that. Not some what i heard somebody say they tried that worked.

Shit even comes w the lil hand warmer to stick to it and keep it and and a temp gauge
Click to expand...
Bruh i got a bottle in the car and 1 in the work locker
 
Glad I never had to go through anything like this but I'm sure theres ways to pass the test, just head over to your local head shop they'll probably be able to help you.

Little tip though according to an ex jumpoff who managed one of the types of labs companies use to do the testing...

A) probably shouldnt use goldenseal- hell yeah it masks it, which is why most labs test specifically for that and you may have to retest or worse
B) theres almost always a legal drug that can give you false positives for illegal ones. In your homies case, should the weed come up in his piss, tell him act ignorant and claim his only drug abuse is excessive usage of advil, ibuprofen, tylenol, etc. tell him to say he has constant headaches, constantly pops pain relievers, even needs tylenol PM every night before bed. Could buy him some time or they may chalk it up and give him the position

Hope this helps, he clearly does his job well enough to offer him a promotion while smoking regularly so it shouldnt even be an issue
 
xxironxx said:
Synthetix5. Fake pee. Shit was $20 out the door. Saved me my fucking job.

Punk ass lil cac caused a chain reaction accident. I was the 4th and last car hit. So long story short i was in a company truck and had to take a drug test and that shit worked. I'm at work typing this now my nigga. So I'd go with that. Not some what i heard somebody say they tried that worked.

Shit even comes w the lil hand warmer to stick to it and keep it warm and and a temp gauge

Oh and it only takes 10 secs in the microwave to get you right
Click to expand...
Man this shit is hilarious!!!!
 
34real said:
Nigga shit because he knew this was coming so why smoke weed?

weed or a job?dumbass you need a job to buy the weed so why not stop for a month.
Click to expand...
A buddy has the opportunity of a lifetime... he's been with the same company for years, but the new gig came out of nowhere.
 
He's gonna have to buy a cleanse the good ones run 50$ you can purchase from the vitamin shoppe or herbal store. He needs that and to drink plenty of cranberry juice and water. Like more than 8 glasses a day.
 

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