I agree with that to a certain degree. Part of it is also not knowing any better and not having anyone expect any better. If I can half-ass it with you, why should I change? If, as a woman or a man, you don't expect your spouse to do shit, don't be mad when they live up to expectations. That's why I hate the idea of romantic "unconditional love". It sets people up to be abused in some way by the other person because they should love them no matter what.
As a big fan of marriage, I always tell my friends and family before they do to imagine that thing the person they're in a relationship with does that annoys you to no end and imagine them doing it forever. That's reality. If you marry someone who cheats or is bad with money or abusive or whatever, marrying them only tells them that it's okay and you really don't mind that much.
I see ladies getting with these types of guys all the time and i do understand how powerful lonliness is. I do understand that not seeing a good example and believing in a good example can lead to really bad decisions.
But when it comes to men, i just believe you should expect better. When my husband and i got together i already had an ideal of what i wanted. I'd been studying this type of thing for quite some time. As my upbringing was kind of messed up and i knew what WASN'T good. I knew what i DIDN'T want. So when i came upon him who was everything that i saw wrong in men before. He was like a beacon of light in a world full of dark ones. He stood out like no one else.
In my travels over the club i've come to understand concepts like HONOR and DUTY. And fulfilling those things at high costs to personal gain. Or personal desire.
And then i see our people and i'm like damn...ain't we supposed to be better? Arent' we supposed to strive to be better? I may not call you a MAN...But i can at least see you TRYING. Trying to be mediocre ain't the same either. Maintaining ain't the same either. When i hear from guys "hey i maintain" i'm like what? What do you mean Maintain? Since when is maintaining where you are currently a GOOD thing unless you're already perfect?
"Hey i got a job....i maintain". I don't want maintain. I want EXCEL. I want CONSTANTLY STRIVE for better.