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ineedafix jr

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Are there any of you (or friends of yours *wink*) that are married, but live a double life online?..(i.e. secret email accounts, myspace private profiles, undercover chat)

Do you consider it cheating? What would you expect if you got caught? Divorce, separation, or invite your husband to do the same?
 
I think if you lie about it to your SO, then it's cheating.

I don't know how many times a wife or girlfriend has emailed me after catching her husband/boyfriend sending emails to me.

Why does it have to be a secret if you're not doing anything wrong?
 
femmenoire said:
I think if you lie about it to your SO, then it's cheating.

I don't know how many times a wife or girlfriend has emailed me after catching her husband/boyfriend sending emails to me.

Why does it have to be a secret if you're not doing anything wrong?
Click to expand...


the reason it's a secret is because women don't want their husbands to interact with a woman on a intimate level. like my wifey says she's all the female friend i need.

thank god i got an office in m house.
 
sizzlelater said:
the reason it's a secret is because women don't want their husbands to interact with a woman on a intimate level. like my wifey says she's all the female friend i need.

thank god i got an office in m house.
Click to expand...

Well why do you need to interact with another woman on an intimate level?

Because you want more than one.

Why get married, if that's what you want?
 
femmenoire said:
Well why do you need to interact with another woman on an intimate level?

Because you want more than one.

Why get married, if that's what you want?
Click to expand...

no i'm not saying i want more than one it just sometimes you need a female input that isn't bias. u can't discuss every thing with your wife, if u do you'll be in the dog house alot.

that's y i like this spot, ya'll have mature topics
 
sizzlelater said:
no i'm not saying i want more than one it just sometimes you need a female input that isn't bias. u can't discuss every thing with your wife, if u do you'll be in the dog house alot.

that's y i like this spot, ya'll have mature topics
Click to expand...


Oh well I wouldn't have a problem if it was just talk but I know better than that. :hmm:
 
ineedafix jr said:
Are there any of you (or friends of yours *wink*) that are married, but live a double life online?..(i.e. secret email accounts, myspace private profiles, undercover chat)

Do you consider it cheating? What would you expect if you got caught? Divorce, separation, or invite your husband to do the same?
Click to expand...

It's definitley cheating.:smh: I dont know if it warrants a divorce, but it would be a serious issue to discuss.:smh:
 
sizzlelater said:
i'm not saying i'm an angel, but i have female friends that i just talk with about marital issues.
Click to expand...


There is nothing wrong with that.

But let me ask you this. Have you ever discussed being intimate with your female friends and have they ever initiated any discussion of the like with you?
 
is what we do here on SOL considered this type of "intimacy" or "cheating" ?
 
femmenoire said:
I think if you lie about it to your SO, then it's cheating.
I don't know how many times a wife or girlfriend has emailed me after catching her husband/boyfriend sending emails to me.
Why does it have to be a secret if you're not doing anything wrong?
Click to expand...

Do you feel like you bear any culpability when you get those emails from spouses or girlfriends. I mean if you know someone is keeping you a seceret and you continue to talk do you become as guilty as them?
 
femmenoire said:
There is nothing wrong with that.
Click to expand...

So then when is it truly considered "line crossed"? I mean, someone mentioned it already...if sharing intimate details with someone of the opposite sex is a form of cheating; then I guess we are all guilty (if married) up in here.

I think the internet has allowed married folks to become a lot more open with strangers (and even folks they know) because of the ability to be "secret" about the things they do online. I've got friends that have put sniffers on their wires at home just for that very reason. A bit over the line? I'm not sure, but it's a good topic to discuss.

Thanks for all of the honest responses!
 
femmenoire said:
I think if you lie about it to your SO, then it's cheating.

I don't know how many times a wife or girlfriend has emailed me after catching her husband/boyfriend sending emails to me.

Why does it have to be a secret if you're not doing anything wrong?
Click to expand...

I agree with ya! Why lie??? If you or her are talking to someone else like that then something is wrong and the only way to fix it is the two of you start talking. BTW if my girl contacts you for any reason, tell her everything! I don’t hide shit and will not lie about a damn thing! LIFE IS TOO FUCKING SHORT!
:cool:
 
Peanutbutta said:
Do you feel like you bear any culpability when you get those emails from spouses or girlfriends. I mean if you know someone is keeping you a seceret and you continue to talk do you become as guilty as them?
Click to expand...


No, I never know. They either say they are divorced or that they are not married at all.

In one particular case, I explained to the wife what happened and now we email each other consistently.

It's just like if I'm out and I meet a man who is honest about being married and he says, "I'm just looking for new friends". I'll say, as long as I get to meet your wife, it's cool. Then they shut up.
 
bigirl said:
is what we do here on SOL considered this type of "intimacy" or "cheating" ?
Click to expand...

In my humbel opinion most people are just on here discussing different topics with some occasional bouts of e-flirting.:yes:

But when you start to PM someone else on the regular trying your best to set up some sex/booty calls then you have infringed on your partners trust.:smh:

There is nothing wrong with having friends if you are involved in a relationship unless you trying to fuck them.:hmm:
 
ineedafix jr said:
What would be your approach to the issue?
Click to expand...

This is one of those times I wish my husband had an account on here:smh: He could tell you better than I can:angry:

All I will say is this. My initial reaction would be to go off and I wouldnt need to see him for a few days. Then I would analyze the emails and conversations they were having and figure out what all of it was really about. Meaning, was it for lust, attention or just boredom. Were they talking about hooking up or just sharing erotic fantasies? After that he and I would need to talk about what we really mean to each other and if we could make our marriage work. If we both want to make the marriage work we have to communicate w/ one another to see why we are venturing outside of the marriage for things we should have w/i each other. Then we have to take heed actually & fulfil(sp) the needs of each other. Life happens, poor decisions will be made. But the thing is will the cheating spouse continue to make the same bad choices, after the other spouse has done all they can?
 
femmenoire said:
I think if you lie about it to your SO, then it's cheating.

I don't know how many times a wife or girlfriend has emailed me after catching her husband/boyfriend sending emails to me.

Why does it have to be a secret if you're not doing anything wrong?
Click to expand...

Peanutbutta said:
Do you feel like you bear any culpability when you get those emails from spouses or girlfriends. I mean if you know someone is keeping you a seceret and you continue to talk do you become as guilty as them?
Click to expand...

femmenoire said:
No, I never know. They either say they are divorced or that they are not married at all.

In one particular case, I explained to the wife what happened and now we email each other consistently.

It's just like if I'm out and I meet a man who is honest about being married and he says, "I'm just looking for new friends". I'll say, as long as I get to meet your wife, it's cool. Then they shut up.
Click to expand...

The guilty party is the one holding the secret from the spouse! The spouse should have the issue with the one they are sleeping with and not the other party.
Knowing how dudes are I will never fuck with another dude’s girl and know about it. However, if that end up being the case he needs to check his girl and not me.
:cool:
 
Lick said:
The guilty party is the one holding the secret from the spouse! The spouse should have the issue with the one they are sleeping with and not the other party.
Knowing how dudes are I will never fuck with another dude’s girl and know about it. However, if that end up being the case he needs to check his girl and not me.
:cool:
Click to expand...

Word. The issue is the breach of trust between the two people who were supposedly committed to each other.

And "thinkin" about leaving and gone are two different things. No matter how bad a relationship is, as long as you're still in it - honor YOUR commitment. It's not about what the other person deserves, its about your own integrity. Get out first.

Your true character is what you do when nobody's looking...
 
lilsexii said:
Word. The issue is the breach of trust between the two people who were supposedly committed to each other.

And "thinkin" about leaving and gone are two different things. No matter how bad a relationship is, as long as you're still in it - honor YOUR commitment. It's not about what the other person deserves, its about your own integrity. Get out first.

Your true character is what you do when nobody's looking...
Click to expand...
"I LIKE" your quote! I will use it as my quote for the day!

:cool:
 
OnyxFemme said:
This is one of those times I wish my husband had an account on here:smh: He could tell you better than I can:angry:

All I will say is this. My initial reaction would be to go off and I wouldnt need to see him for a few days. Then I would analyze the emails and conversations they were having and figure out what all of it was really about. Meaning, was it for lust, attention or just boredom. Were they talking about hooking up or just sharing erotic fantasies? After that he and I would need to talk about what we really mean to each other and if we could make our marriage work. If we both want to make the marriage work we have to communicate w/ one another to see why we are venturing outside of the marriage for things we should have w/i each other. Then we have to take heed actually & fulfil(sp) the needs of each other. Life happens, poor decisions will be made. But the thing is will the cheating spouse continue to make the same bad choices, after the other spouse has done all they can?
Click to expand...


What a thoughtful answer......Life does happen...one or two mistakes are just that; mistakes...three and four makes it a pattern....I think with the online thing, it is mostly curiosity as we are curious by nature.....
 
I knew a couple of people that were caught doing shit like running up phone charges on 900 numbers and fuckin strippers behind their wives' backs. I knew about 5 women that were married that had secret accounts that their husbands didn't know/care about. Women with boyfriends, same thing...they wanted variety or to see how far they can go for excitement...

Wow...no wonder I trust no one for relationships.
 
bigirl said:
is what we do here on SOL considered this type of "intimacy" or "cheating" ?
Click to expand...

yes, both the women and men on here begging for nude shots and videos from one another, I think the women just want some attention ... meanwhile the men are trying to sweet talk their way into some pm's, chats, then on to plans and meeting locations, major e-cheating going on round here unless your SO knows about it
 
If it was just strictly friendly conversation, platonic friendship I wouldn't have a problem...but let's be real, it's always about sex. Why else would you need to hide it? How would you honestly feel if you found out your wife had internet buddies she felt she needed to hide from you?
 
One of the great pleasures in life
is
fucking another man's wife..

it's like cheating on your taxes and getting a bigger reture
pulling into a parking space only to find out that the meter got 30 minutes on it...

you fucking her
and you don't have to deal with any of the bullshit...

highly recommend it...

P.S
I did not read this post
so I have no idea what it's about
just wanted to share my opionion on married women..
 
Don't say or do anything with someone of the opposite sex that you couldn't say or do in front of your other half, then you can't go wrong.
 
sexylegz33 said:
If it was just strictly friendly conversation, platonic friendship I wouldn't have a problem...but let's be real, it's always about sex. Why else would you need to hide it? How would you honestly feel if you found out your wife had internet buddies she felt she needed to hide from you?
Click to expand...

My thing is you don't have to hide anything...


:cool:
 
Yo. More women cheat than men... who are they fucking? Women are 100 times more devious than men when it comes to doing dirt. Trust and believe. I'll never forget one time I was getting some head from a friend of mine and her cell rang. She looked at the display without even taking my johnson from her mouth (it was her man), rolled her eyes and proceeded with gusto to relase my seed. Now that was low... but sexy!! :lol: Peace.
 
buck_ya_bitch said:
One of the great pleasures in life
is
fucking another man's wife..

it's like cheating on your taxes and getting a bigger reture
pulling into a parking space only to find out that the meter got 30 minutes on it...

you fucking her
and you don't have to deal with any of the bullshit...

highly recommend it...

P.S
I did not read this post
so I have no idea what it's about
just wanted to share my opionion on married women..
Click to expand...

I TOTALLY disagree with ya playa, but you do you. I've never knowingly fucked a married woman. I say knowingly because once I met a lady online, went out once and fucked..she never let me in her bedroom. I always thought something was suspect, there. But I don't EVER wanna have some dude after me cuz I got with his woman. NEVER. Peeps get shot for that
 

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