I agree Jam Jam. All this shit is a crap shoot. Believe it or not, I just determined that shit -- I mean REALLY accepted it -- within the last 2 years.
Number 1, Marriage is overrated. I did all the
right things the right way . And still, I am going thru a divorce right now. I went school, graduated with a bachelors, landed a good job, met a man, got engaged for 2 years, married him, had a baby 3 years later. The marriage went south and I realized it was no longer healthy to be in, even for my daughters sake. Im saying all this shit to say that even if you do the
right things shit can still be jacked up.
Number 2, Relationships are nice, but not necessary. (I wish the "old school" generation would accept that shit! I hear them talk about how my female cousins must be gay because they are in their 30s and not married! WTF?!?!
) Fuck all that. MFs need to focus on going to school, getting the paper, get a good job, KEEPING THE JOB, save money and invest wisely. (Over Thanksgiving, I heard 3 stories from college drop-outs wishing they'd stayed in school. Degrees can make a $30K difference on an entry level job!!) I digress. Anyway, if you are single, sure you may get lonely! But I've learned that thats the time to focus on improving self, obtain new skills, enjoy family, improve faith, join organizations and volunteer in the community.
Number 3. Like the SOS Band says,
Take your time do it right. Im kicking myself in the ass for not heeding this advice I got years ago. Now, I truly know what it means. WTF is everyone rushing to be in committed relationships for? They are time consuming, expensive and stressful. Although I no longer have casual sex (It's so not safe and hell, I'm 32 with a daughter!), my focus is on my child and being a good, solid provider and role model. But when I do get the patience (and energy) to settle down with a man again, it will be slow and easy, giving 100%.