about an hour ago ·
I have the power to reduce our DEBT by TRILLIONS in ONE NIGHT, folks!
Nobody else can do it! President Xi of China came to me during our high-level summit and made a proposition—but it was totally outrageous. He thought he was Robert Redford in Indecent Proposal!
First of all, I had to explain to him that movies are NOT real life. They are NOT documentaries! Total Hollywood fantasy!
He looked at me across the big negotiation table and offered to completely erase our debt to China—we’re talking TRILLIONS of dollars, the biggest debt write-off in human history! But in exchange, he wanted “personal time” with my beautiful wife, Lady Melania.
Can you believe it?! I looked him right in the eye and said, “Mr. President, you can’t buy my family, and you certainly can’t buy my beautiful wife!”
Melania, a total patriot, then looked at me and said, “Darling, eet eez only my vajeen! I veel do anysing for de USA!” Can you believe the dedication, folks?! Unbelievable loyalty! She exemplifies class and beauty, more so than any other First Lady in our History!
MELANOMIA IS TOTAL MAGA!!
#Trump #Satire