you ain't lying. I still ask myself what the hell happened after I turned 25.
There's not enough eligible black males to fit the needs of black women.
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My Knicca....I'm in agreement...find em...fuck...and flee... brah
If you replace the word "need" with "want" or "desire" then what she says is plausible. She identified the part of the problem. As black women move up in education and wealth, their "wants" regarding men increase. But, what many of you have pointed out is that men do not value their education and wealth the same as they do.
So, even with their degrees, they are still competing with women without degrees who work regular jobs.
If you ever want to trigger an aggressive college educated woman or "successful" woman, tell her that a man looking for a wife would choose an agreeable, feminine, beautiful, uneducated woman working at burger king over her.
She will have a melt down.
So, even with their degrees, they are still competing with women without degrees who work regular jobs.
If you ever want to trigger an aggressive college educated woman or "successful" woman, tell her that a man looking for a wife would choose an agreeable, feminine, beautiful, uneducated woman working at burger king over her.
She will have a melt down.
Gotta handed to these crackers
they really did a number on some of us
they really did a number on some of us
Honestly, bro in today’s society you’re are defined by your wallet. It just comes with the territory and makes things much easier to navigate. Modern civilization doesn’t require hunting, building shelter with our bare hands or fighting another man to the death for status. Biologically, we still have that imperative. But in a modern capitalist society, money buys protection, shelter and status. That’s today’s equivalent of being a man unless you literally going back to the wilderness. It just is that way and I ain’t mad at it.
There’s more to it of course like understanding how to lead and be in control in a relationship, but you gotta understand it from a woman’s perspective too. They’re looking for that leadership, but also what provides them security and protection (money). I didn’t understand this until after my divorce. My ex was a MBA and was making more than me. I thought logically it made sense for her to handle the money, but subconsciously I did not like that shit. I realized years later even though I had a decent job to help support a family the vibe wasn’t right. I now know that I felt some kind of way because she could financially take of the family without my help, but I couldn’t without her help. It threw off the dynamics of the marriage. Not that a woman can’t make more than you, but you gotta make enough to know that you can handle things on your own. It’s subtle, but makes a big difference to your psyche. Never compromise what makes you a man and they rest will fall in place. I truly understand what Tony Montana was saying in Scarface.
“All I got is my balls and my word.. ”
That line makes sense on some many levels when you fully understand manhood, but the money part is big in modern society.
We text eachother damn near everyday we miss one another, I’ve noticed if I take a break she’ll do the same
follows my lead 90% of the time, makes me wonder sometimes
I’m quiet, she at times takes it as stand-offish, I’m like no, I go blank, you know this
whatever, I belong on a ranch away from people
LMFAO!!!
Bro, we can agree to disagree. I feel all of what you said but your last statement contradicted everything you said about money. "All I got is my balls and my word." That statement tells you all you really have as a man. If money makes the man, then why does a pimp has a stable of women going out there to make money for him. He argues he is a protector but women are constantly harassed and assaulted on the streets. So it ain't money. Further, I don't want to get into a philosophical debate over what is manhood. But, I can tell you this. When I was a young buck, I had a lot of women, and fine women with quality educations and I drove around in a raggedy red truck. Maybe they saw my potential or maybe as I believe that saw me. The true me. Even more so, I have never defined myself on how much money I made. Being in academia for most of my working life, I never really made any money. But, I was well respected, if not for the title, then it was what I stood for. Even in the brutal age we came out of, people defined manhood on something that was more noble than money. If money was the only determination for manhood then what about Malcolm X, Martin Luther King, WEB Dubois, Marcus Garvey, etc. They weren't defined by their wallets. What about the millions of black men who came before us, who had not, but survived the advents of racism, Jim Crow and white supremacy. So, I will got back to my original statement. Money does not define my manhood. There are a lot of us out there. All black women have to do is come off their high horse and choose to build a nation. They can have their cake and eat it too but it might be unconventional. Also, I am sorry for your divorce. But, when you look at it, you are more than your money. If you are true with me and yourself, you know the model in which we are under is bullshit.
bump
Let em know... brah
There are plenty of black men out there for black women it’s just sometimes you run into a black woman that wants everything to be 100% perfect and that is not the case. Hell I want a Beyoncé with a bigger ass but I have no issues taking a decent looking intelligent nice black woman. And I told a woman a long time ago this comment….If you Run across a guy you think is 100% perfect, thats the guy that is going to take you through hell.
And then what if you're not your ideal man's ideal woman?
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I like sharing the conversation I have with my students, so I hope y’all don’t mind.
I was speaking with another ambitious young lady yesterday. She comes from a privileged background where she said money has never really been an issue. She lives in south side Charlotte and has both of her parents in her life. Seemingly has a very good relationship with both.
I asked her did she have a boyfriend and she said yes.
Now, we all have standards and I totally understand why we have them when it comes to relationships with people.
Like most ambitious women, she has a plan and determined to ensure those plans go through accordingly. She is a 4th generation college student which is amazing in itself. So she has been exposed much differently than the majority of black folks out here.
Her boyfriend goes to community college, which she claims she doesn’t have an issue with. I believe her. However, she said she wants to be taken care of, so she pushes him to try and make something for himself. Again, I have no issue with that. As a matter of fact, he doesn’t come from the same background as her, so a little motivation and push might be good for him.
Here is where the issue comes into play. I ask her, “what if it takes him longer to establish himself because he has more hurdles and road blocks to overcome?” She already mentioned that she impatient, so I asked, “do you think it’s fair that you expect the same from him as you do yourself?” She stumbled a moment, then said “no.”
I ask, “what if he in unable to financially take care of you the way you want to, but he is a great father, gives you emotional support, and cares about you? Would that not be enough?”
She sat and thought about it, and I could see that she never thought about those other things. I told her to be careful with those expectations you set. She has all the right in the world to have them, but just understand it might not be fair to the other person that is incapable of meeting them in a relationship.
I was speaking with another ambitious young lady yesterday. She comes from a privileged background where she said money has never really been an issue. She lives in south side Charlotte and has both of her parents in her life. Seemingly has a very good relationship with both.
I asked her did she have a boyfriend and she said yes.
Now, we all have standards and I totally understand why we have them when it comes to relationships with people.
Like most ambitious women, she has a plan and determined to ensure those plans go through accordingly. She is a 4th generation college student which is amazing in itself. So she has been exposed much differently than the majority of black folks out here.
Her boyfriend goes to community college, which she claims she doesn’t have an issue with. I believe her. However, she said she wants to be taken care of, so she pushes him to try and make something for himself. Again, I have no issue with that. As a matter of fact, he doesn’t come from the same background as her, so a little motivation and push might be good for him.
Here is where the issue comes into play. I ask her, “what if it takes him longer to establish himself because he has more hurdles and road blocks to overcome?” She already mentioned that she impatient, so I asked, “do you think it’s fair that you expect the same from him as you do yourself?” She stumbled a moment, then said “no.”
I ask, “what if he in unable to financially take care of you the way you want to, but he is a great father, gives you emotional support, and cares about you? Would that not be enough?”
She sat and thought about it, and I could see that she never thought about those other things. I told her to be careful with those expectations you set. She has all the right in the world to have them, but just understand it might not be fair to the other person that is incapable of meeting them in a relationship.
Dude doesn’t stand a chance.
NONE!
She said she will be really upset with him if he doesn’t graduate college. She going to feel like she wasted her time pushing him.
Then I said, y’all need to have a real serious conversation then.
Sadly, that makes her an asshole. Who the fuck is she to tell him what he needs to become just to take care of her? He might love what he does and only make 60k. She’s going to project her disappointment in him onto the next man and never be happy after her first marriage.NONE!
She said she will be really upset with him if he doesn’t graduate college. She going to feel like she wasted her time pushing him.
Then I said, y’all need to have a real serious conversation then.
Well, remember I said she comes from privilege, so she is only projecting what she saw from her mother. Her mother is well taken care of because her dad makes good money. She at minimum she believe she deserves that.
I predict that if she stays with buddy, he isn’t going to meet her expectations. However, there are plenty of guys on campus that probably will be better suited, but they may fail in other areas she thought was less meaningful, but ended up being more meaningful than she imagined.
I wonder how many of these successful women that can't find husbands are looking for 50/50 partnerships instead of a relationship where the man is the head of the household.
Some women have difficulty trusting men, so the thought of allowing a man to be in control of important aspects of her life, especially when she's built a lot on her own, might be difficult.
Some women have difficulty trusting men, so the thought of allowing a man to be in control of important aspects of her life, especially when she's built a lot on her own, might be difficult.
Unpopular statement coming:
As men we complain waaaaay too much about what we caused. (And don’t be the idiot that says “not all men” ) If all these piece of shit kids are raised by single mothers, what’s the REAL problem? The common denominator? Us! I’m tired of the hoodrat, single Mother shit as much as the “there are no good men” shit from woman. If MOST black women are single moms, somebody is fucking em—RAW! Somebody ELSE got em pregnant and possibly again. That means BLACK MEN have low-fucking-standards! If she’s a hoodrat, or something you’d only fuck once, why-do-it-raw???? Stop nutting in women you wouldn’t buy a house with! Goddamn, black men!
The ONLY way these kids are growing up with single moms is their dads don’t give a fuck. Their dads love them, but want nothing to do with them. Or, even worse, because the mom makes it hard for them to see their kids, y’all simply don’t. Or, she ran you through the courts so you just pay what you owe and THEN date other women with kids while ignoring yours. Half the shit these women Say about us is true! I know several fools with a baby by a woman they hate who do little to nothing for them but their knew girlfriend got two kids!That dude is TRASH! Y’all fucking ugly women with dope bodies and when she’s pregnant you can’t imagine wifing her, now you’ve created another ugly person and a new statistic—AND WE BLAME THE WOMEN! It’s US! No standards whatsoever. The reason the threads suck on this board is because y’all posting trash, photoshopped, tatted up, weaved up bitches when porn is about fantasy. A bitch we all see at the gas station ain’t fantasy! Y’all steady “RAW”!!!! Jokingly, yes, but ehhhh!
The modern black woman is trash because black men love to wallow in trash! I fuckin said it! There’s too many ghetto ratchet fat green hair women with two kids or more for this to her all on the women! No-fucking-standards! My homie invited me over. His wife’s friend like me. She comes over to talk and she is cute but the makeup was caked on and her weave was just too much for me. Even if I was single and she made the pussy easy I would NOT have even taken head from her. I have standards. The women are worse because black men accept worse. They used to just be mouthy-we accepted it. Then they started having more kids in grade school—cool. Dress trashy—she got a fat ass though. Can’t string a sentence together, single mom, ratchet ways—she got some nice titties though. Miss me with the “single moms” ruined black boys shit. His bitch ass dad ain’t around to prevent it so it’s his (our) fault too!!!! Our women are worse because we are worse. Facts.
I think you're talking about two different women. The women you're talking about aren't starting businesses and don't have advanced degrees.
Even minus the privilege she's already experienced I wouldn't doubt that she still has the mindset that whoever I date/marry has to be doing better than I am so they can take care of me. It's old advice passed down but it isn't really realistic. Kind of similar to the outdated "Work yourself up from the bottom, up" mentality that a lot of boomers still have.
Even if he does finish college it still doesn't mean he's going to be doing better than her from here on out. Often times women nowadays outproduce men up until they start dropping out to have children (which is when the wage gap starts. If you are out for a year after a child, don't expect to be making the same as the dude who started the same time you did originally)
But anyhow, two average people can if they work together be an above average couple. Too bad a lot of women can't really get that, or think they deserve to coast after a while.
Even if he does finish college it still doesn't mean he's going to be doing better than her from here on out. Often times women nowadays outproduce men up until they start dropping out to have children (which is when the wage gap starts. If you are out for a year after a child, don't expect to be making the same as the dude who started the same time you did originally)
But anyhow, two average people can if they work together be an above average couple. Too bad a lot of women can't really get that, or think they deserve to coast after a while.
Nothing wrong with women, it's the laws that protect them, and none to protect us.
Dealing with a lot of black women, is like playing a game of football where the opponent can tackle you, hit you out of bounds, hit you after the whistle, but you can only tag them or pull their flag off.
Average black dude has no way to protect himself, and if the situation is not damn near perfect, the juice is not worth the squeeze. A lot of cats are falling back because they have no protection, and dating pool is shrinking fast for black women.
Black women in general are getting ignored at home, and in the workplace. A few black men are out here that are willing to deal with them.
They overvalue themselves because of the laws and thirsty cats on social media.
Dealing with a lot of black women, is like playing a game of football where the opponent can tackle you, hit you out of bounds, hit you after the whistle, but you can only tag them or pull their flag off.
Average black dude has no way to protect himself, and if the situation is not damn near perfect, the juice is not worth the squeeze. A lot of cats are falling back because they have no protection, and dating pool is shrinking fast for black women.
Black women in general are getting ignored at home, and in the workplace. A few black men are out here that are willing to deal with them.
They overvalue themselves because of the laws and thirsty cats on social media.
This is a huge issue. She needs to stay in her lane. A woman should be supportive of her man but she has no business "pushing" him to do better. She's already taken a leadership role in the relationship which, in-and-of-itself, is an issue for any man. If dude did make something of himself, I'm sure she would think it was her doing.
very true. I also stated to her that she could push him to become something and he end up leaving her once he gets established. lol
Agreed!
Monica back with C-Murder?
Water always finds it's level.Monica back with C-Murder?
I won't go so far as to call her a hoodrat, she is a very accomplished R&B singer and seems like a nice lady. Let's use the term, 'Gutter Bunny' instead.
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