My Wife Threatens to “End It All” Whenever I Ask Her to Get a Job

[717jet]

She has $100,000 in loans from a master’s program that kicked her out.

I’m newly married, about six months now. My wife had difficulties that resulted in her getting kicked out of her master’s program. Until this point she had taken out around $100,000 in loans. I’ve been trying to persuade her to get a job, any job, to help pay down her student debt, but she always says, “I’d rather end it all than work a job I don’t love.” I entered this marriage thinking we’d be equal partners, but I’m finding that’s not the case. I’ve tried talking about it, but she claims it makes her “too stressed” and “too angry to talk about.” How can I approach this? It’s unlikely she’ll be able to work in her original field, and I don’t think I can support us and her student debt alone.

 

[Simply_Black]

It's obvious she really doesn't have a clue how a true marriage works... or she was looking for a sucka to use.

If she's not willing to make a sacrifice and work to help support you, her and the marriage now, just image what you'll face in the future.

Good luck with all that, you'll need it.

 

[zod16]

You didn't talk about this before getting married?

 

[dasmybikepunk]

Tell her to look into collegiate hardship cases to see if she can get back into the program. If she had the grades.

 

[ugk]

If you aren't stacking any bread without any kids, I'd cut the losses and divorce her

it's clear she was looking for a sucker to dump all her debt on and now she's manipulating you because she doesn't want to take responsible for her past financial decisions.

 

[Mrfreddygoodbud]

bruh..

what program did she get kicked out of, whats her passion??

she sounds pretty flighty???

and you sound pretty pussy whipped.. but thats ok....you aint

the only in the world...

lol,

while we discussing her situation, Id be lowkey getting her to sign a prenuptial...

and when she says end it all..

does she mean the marriage or her life..

if she is talkin her life..

Id tell her ass straight up... if you need some help lets talk about this now

and what can I do to help..

because if she says that shit again.... I will end the marriage..

I aint stayin with NO suicidal bitch.. all that till death do us part..

is some bullshit most of the time...

 

[cnc]

Sorry you’re in this situation.

If she’s unable or unwilling to work, you’ve got two options:

1) come up with a plan to pay the debt which should then allow her to find work that she finds acceptable;

2) figure out your exit plan.

For $100k I hope her program was a STEM field at an Ivy League, or top tier private or state school. Otherwise she got finessed on the price and you’re getting finessed on her contribution to the marriage’s long term sustainability.

With $100k invested she needs to at least get back in and finish the program, but her unwillingness to be reasonable bodes BAD for you fam. I’d be lowkey planning my exit strategy in case she never comes around. At MINIMUM do not refinance the loan in your name or jointly (I don’t think you can anyway but I’d verify) and keep ALL accounts and expenses separate. Consult an attorney just to have a discussion about options; money well spent for you to know what options you have.

 

[Z MONSTER]

Leave her. I'm not trying to be a smart ass. I didn't leave my ex wife and she was in the same boat. I ended up having 2 kids with her and stayed in that madness because I didn't want her to corrupt my kids. When they were in their teens and knew the deal I bounced. My son and daughter are now in college (thanks to me).

 

[Sango]

To end it all? As in commit suicide if she's to get a job or end the marriage? Because is much easier than the other and requires you not to do much... actually

 

[Ceenote]

Well since your newly married and hopefully you dont have a house, car or kids together i would let it go... because this set an example of what the rest of your life together will be.. either your gonna put your foot down you guys will get through this ending up with her getting a job..

 

[Tiger_Hood]

Get your marriage anulled.

 

[DWBass]

I left my second wife because she didn't want to work. She was a singer but cats kept calling her to do shit but not pay her! Fuck that!

 

[Dr. Truth]

I left my second wife because she didn't want to work. She was a singer but cats kept calling her to do shit but not pay her! Fuck that!

This shit made me LOL

 

[therealjondoe]

Pics?

 

[Dr. Truth]

Pics?

 

[BGLR1212000]

Tell her to get the fuck on if she want to leave

 

[cincitystudios]

Man... I would strongly consider leaving as well. If yall ain't got any kids, leave now!!! You don't want a child with someone who does not want to work and can't even talk about class or getting a job, to be the mother of your kid

 

[0utsyder]

Dog if you have Kids you're just FCUKED! If not then get separate banking, take her off of your shyt. This includes ANY shared bills(I.e. insurance, phone, etc...) You don't work, you don't feast. She is a partner not a dependent! What does she do all day?

 

[ScottyPiffen745]

It depends on the description of her ideal job.

If it's nothing or some bullshit where she ultimately does no work, she's just lazy and you need to leave.

If it's some shit you gotta put up gang of money for, or she trying to mooch onto your job, she running game.

And since she's on some manipulative shit, I would've hit her with the ultimatum like "you've got this long to come up with a passion or a purpose, and I'mma ask you this shit again, if you say that fucking bullshit again, I'm gone end it all."

Don't tolerate no mooching. You might end up working your ass off to get that 100 to a 0, and she could dip right after that last payment hit.

I don't how the hell you got this far into a marriage without having this discussion.

 

[Louis Koo]

sucka free sundays

 

[havelcok]

get life insurance on her

 

[3nedds]

Time to bounce

 

[BronxBomber]

Fam get out FAST! If you six months in and this is how she is she has made her life choice to use you as a bank. Unfortunately my brother it seems you may have fell for the oldest trick in the book.

this is not said without having bunch of grays in my beard and seeing brothers trooping in 20 years only to realize they wasted years serving their wife with no reward but bitterness..


don’t waste your time for someone who does not respect you. It’s honorable and noble but TRUST the 50 comments that’s about to be coming tellin you leave her.

 

[blackpepper]

I didn't read all the comments, but it obvious to me that she's going to need some time to get herself together. Meanwhile, you'll just have to carry the load and it could take a couple years. Keep insisting she gets counseling. Through sickness and in health is what you signed up for.

 

[theoriginalgreatone]

I'd just say bye

 

[Flawless]

She knows she has you by the balls, start hiding your money and get out.

 

[housefly]

This is not the kind of person that is gonna be there when you need her.
Imagine if you are sick and can't work I can guarantee that she won't be there for you.
If she gets stressed form this little bit of adversity imagine when shit gets really real.
Get out now!

 

[yardy]

Get your marriage anulled.

^^
This

The signs are already there
6 months in, crazy debt, unwilling to work and can't even discuss it
Dawg cut your losses now, it will only get worse.

 

[veritech]

if yall don't have any kids you need to bail.

now.

 

[RoomService]

“I’d rather end it all than work a job I don’t love.”

What does that mean? Are you part of the all?

 

[FUCKYOU]

unfortunately, dude will not leave and will end up with child support and alimony in 5 years.... LEAVE NOW while you can start over with minimal damage...

 

[knightmelodic]

First - who is that big nippled chick in your sig?

Second - take out a nice insurance policy on her.

Third - I really don't have to tell you do I?

 

[rage]

You've got to sit her down and tell her exactly how you feel,in no uncertain terms. Money has to be made for you guys to have the lifestyle you BOTH want, it is a marriage after all. If you're not hearing what you need to hear from her it's time you leave her. Don't waste your time bro.

 

[Genesiswiz]

I need some pics to make an assessment. I'm not trying to be crude, but please include hair, feet and ass pics. If you think it's weird that I ask for pics, it's not as you are asking marital questions on a porn board. I'm just requesting that you make this post useful to the board by putting a woman in it -- Your woman. You will get way more answers with wife pics, like "bullet" fast. I'm old school BGOL, ya dig

 

[Bad Andy]

Cut your losses while you ahead. These chicks think they can get away with being bums