Reasons to be private (whats yours) & is being private really worth it?

[Top_Bunk]

Rumors usually start with a lil bit of truth. Sometimes people take the truth and fabricate it & exagerate it other times they misinterpret what you said & tell other people & they misinterpret then you have a bold face lie.

instigators. People like to egg others on and start shit. It's funny i'm private and i see people tell people shit all the time. Shit this dude i meet just to fix my car told me how he sells coke and where he sells it. Luckily my username is just that. A username.

The bad thing about being private

People think you're working for area 51. Everything you're private about they think it's because of something bad. And also that makes them want to get into your business even more.

People paint a perception of you to satisfy their desire to want to know who, what and why you are that way. Usually they try to flatter themselves when they try to explain this as well. It's really kinda funny. And by the way it's sad to say but there are grown ass people that still haven't learned that there are two sides of a story. i mean like 58 & they dont understand to refrain from judgement because they've only heard one side.

To an extent we care what others think. And also to an extent some of us worry about what others think about us.

To give you an example i gurantee if there was a rumor that you had aids & gullible people believed it you'd care. If there was a rumor that you were a pedophile you'd sue for defamation of chracter and would try to rebuild you reputation.

 

[onyxfemme]

I feel where you coming from.....

 

[Top_Bunk]

I feel where you coming from.....

WORD?

 

[JofromthaNO]

I tend to be private about certain aspects of my life because you make yourself vulnerable to others when they know "too much information" about you. That being said, I believe that making yourself completely vulnerable and open is when you show someone unconditional love.

Now, certain aspects of my life, I don't share with others simply because it isn't their business. No one needs to know exactly how much I make, how much I spend, etc. unless I'm in a committed relationship with that persona and we're sharing incomes.

 

[Top_Bunk]

I tend to be private about certain aspects of my life because you make yourself vulnerable to others when they know "too much information" about you. That being said, I believe that making yourself completely vulnerable and open is when you show someone unconditional love.

Now, certain aspects of my life, I don't share with others simply because it isn't their business. No one needs to know exactly how much I make, how much I spend, etc. unless I'm in a committed relationship with that persona and we're sharing incomes.

DONT KNOW IF I COULD EVER DO THAT. BUT HONESTLY I THINK IT'S COOL BECAUSE REALLY I DONT NEED TO VENT ABOUT MAJOR SHIT THAT'S HAPPENED IN MY LIFE. I'M TO TERMS WITH IT. I LOVE MY OUTLOOK ON LIFE

 

[Mo-Better]

I'm the same way, probably why I have but a few friends. But the friends I have are true friends that I wouldn't trade for anything.

But even with them I keep my private life private.

An yes it is worth it!

 

[kwazdog]

I thought this thread was about maritime admiralty law...

 

[Top_Bunk]

I thought this thread was about maritime admiralty law...

 

[sean69]

Agenticity

It's natural.

We have evolved to infer agency upon shit we can't explain, understand or even give a fuck about trying to understand ... inexplicable phenomena.

This is the basis of superstitions, urban legends and the like.

The oportunity-cost/consequence of making a Type 2 error (false negative) is less than that of a Type 1 error (false positive).

That's why rumors survive.

That's why we survive.

Think about it.

 

[P.L.]

Too many haters out there, and it's bad enough when you got one side going against you, but when your own peps do it, . Some try to fill in the blanks, but instead of filling them with positive , they put negative shit. But in the end they look foolish.

 

[Top_Bunk]

Agenticity

It's natural.

We have evolved to infer agency upon shit we can't explain, understand or even give a fuck about trying to understand ... inexplicable phenomena.

This is the basis of superstitions, urban legends and the like.

The oportunity-cost/consequence of making a Type 2 error (false negative) is less than that of a Type 1 error (false positive).

That's why rumors survive.

That's why we survive.

Think about it.

 

[Cleopatra_J]

I find it amusing that someone named "da_ snitch" started a thread on privacy.

on that note.. yes.. only share what you wouldn't mind hearing repeated.

 

[swiftandsilent]

only share what you wouldn't mind hearing repeated.

Very sound advice.

 

[Top_Bunk]

Very sound advice.

so how do you deal with nosey ass co-workers?

 

[sean69]

Come on dude. Think harder.

 

[patience54]

Come on dude. Think harder.

I didn't get what you're trying to say either. Tell it to me like I'm in the eighth grade.

 

[Top_Bunk]

I didn't get what you're trying to say either. Tell it to me like I'm in the eighth grade.

Yes i have to save these brain cells for later

 

[swiftandsilent]

so how do you deal with nosey ass co-workers?

The same way I deal with nosey ass family. I don't tell them shit.

 

[sean69]

I didn't get what you're trying to say either. Tell it to me like I'm in the eighth grade.

Yes i have to save these brain cells for later

OK.

I didn't mean to come off as cryptic. Mybad.

I was addressing the part of what the OP said about people fabricating stuff based on rumors and hear-say, exaggerating, misinterpreting or even reinterpreting based on what they believe to be true or make sense to them.
Like the mystique behind area 51 or interpreting an individuals privacy as sinister or clandestine.

I'm assuming this was the central thesis of the OP's post?

Because of how we've evolved socially, we are more prone to assume that something is true when even if it eventually turns out to be false. In statistical analysis this is called a Type 2 error.

The reprecautions of making these types of errors are typically less detrimental than assuming something is false when it's actually true. A Type 1 error.

For example, say, and I'm just throwing a random name out there ... say ...uhm... a poster on BGOL ...let's call him Godofwine or whatever, is accused of posting tranny porn and then there's a post by this individual titled "OH SHIT!"

Would you click it?

 

[followup]

Describes the old XAT chat to a Tee!

 

[P.L.]

OK.

I didn't mean to come off as cryptic. Mybad.

I was addressing the part of what the OP said about people fabricating stuff based on rumors and hear-say, exaggerating, misinterpreting or even reinterpreting based on what they believe to be true or make sense to them.
Like the mystique behind area 51 or interpreting an individuals privacy as sinister or clandestine.

I'm assuming this was the central thesis of the OP's post?

Because of how we've evolved socially, we are more prone to assume that something is true when even if it eventually turns out to be false. In statistical analysis this is called a Type 2 error.

The reprecautions of making these types of errors are typically less detrimental than assuming something is false when it's actually true. A Type 1 error.

For example, say, and I'm just throwing a random name out there ... say ...uhm... a poster on BGOL ...let's call him Godofwine or whatever, is accused of posting tranny porn and then there's a post by this individual titled "OH SHIT!"

Would you click it?

 

[Top_Bunk]

The same way I deal with nosey ass family. I don't tell them shit.

Ha you must not work in an office where you have to get on the computer.

I be laughing at some of the shit i see on BGOL at my job and people be wondering all what the fuck i'm laughing at and trying to sneak they neck over at my monitor like i dont notice.

 

[swiftandsilent]

Ha you must not work in an office where you have to get on the computer.

I be laughing at some of the shit i see on BGOL at my job and people be wondering all what the fuck i'm laughing at and trying to sneak they neck over at my monitor like i dont notice.

I would never use BGOL in a office setting. That is just asking to be put on the street.

 

[LoneStar29]

I've learned the hard way that the more you open up to people the more they judge you and the realer you are with them the more vulnerable you make yourself to getting hurt by them

Keeping things to yourself and keeping everyone at arms length is probably the best way to go

 

[Poobs]

I've learned the hard way that the more you open up to people the more they judge you and the realer you are with them the more vulnerable you make yourself to getting hurt by them

Keeping things to yourself and keeping everyone at arms length is probably the best way to go

What about when u eventually wanna let stuff out emotionally?..

 

[LoneStar29]

What about when u eventually wanna let stuff out emotionally?..

There are other ways to release your emotions ... one thing I like to do is write down how I feel ... I usually rip up the paper after though cuz I don't want anybody to find it

And I am going to be getting a punching bag as well that is a good way to release emotions

When I open up to people they usually start judging me and making me feel worse ... alot of people can't relate to me ... so I would rather deal with things myself

 

[Crown&Coke]

I've learned the hard way that the more you open up to people the more they judge you and the realer you are with them the more vulnerable you make yourself to getting hurt by them

Keeping things to yourself and keeping everyone at arms length is probably the best way to go

The key is having the right person to be able to vent to. Alot of people dont have true friends and end up talkin to the wrong people about certain things and thats where the judging starts​

 

[LoneStar29]

The key is having the right person to be able to vent to. Alot of people dont have true friends and end up talkin to the wrong people about certain things and thats where the judging starts​

When people can't relate to or haven't experienced what you are talking about they start to judge you ... regardless of who it is


Edit: And lets face it ... noone really wants to be bothered with another persons problems especially if their life is better than the person complaining

 

[Crown&Coke]

When people can't relate to or haven't experienced what you are talking about they start to judge you ... regardless of who it is


Edit: And lets face it ... noone really wants to be bothered with another persons problems especially if their life is better than the person complaining

Thats not true. I got some true friends and they may not have been through what I been through but they dont judge me. We dont judge each other about anything. We are all at different points of our lives but it doesnt matter.


And if a real friend feels bothered by you talkin about whats goin on with your life then that aint a friend. ​

 

[Top_Bunk]

Thats not true. I got some true friends and they may not have been through what I been through but they dont judge me. We dont judge each other about anything. We are all at different points of our lives but it doesnt matter.


And if a real friend feels bothered by you talkin about whats goin on with your life then that aint a friend. ​

It's not wrong to judge when you think about it. I mean look at it....when we say someone is nice that's a judgement. It might be true it might not be but it's a judgement.

 

[APOPHIS]

For example, say, and I'm just throwing a random name out there ... say ...uhm... a poster on BGOL ...let's call him Godofwine or whatever, is accused of posting tranny porn and then there's a post by this individual titled "OH SHIT!"

Would you click it?

Dude, hurry and pay the $10.
I miss your asshole-ish/intelligently worded cynicism.

 

[nicer]

Rumors usually start with a lil bit of truth. Sometimes people take the truth and fabricate it & exagerate it other times they misinterpret what you said & tell other people & they misinterpret then you have a bold face lie.

instigators. People like to egg others on and start shit. It's funny i'm private and i see people tell people shit all the time. Shit this dude i meet just to fix my car told me how he sells coke and where he sells it. Luckily my username is just that. A username.

The bad thing about being private

People think you're working for area 51. Everything you're private about they think it's because of something bad. And also that makes them want to get into your business even more.

People paint a perception of you to satisfy their desire to want to know who, what and why you are that way. Usually they try to flatter themselves when they try to explain this as well. It's really kinda funny. And by the way it's sad to say but there are grown ass people that still haven't learned that there are two sides of a story. i mean like 58 & they dont understand to refrain from judgement because they've only heard one side.

To an extent we care what others think. And also to an extent some of us worry about what others think about us.

To give you an example i gurantee if there was a rumor that you had aids & gullible people believed it you'd care. If there was a rumor that you were a pedophile you'd sue for defamation of chracter and would try to rebuild you reputation.

I see you bro, and what you say is real. what puzzles me is your screen name is "da snitch", but you made a thread about being private are you just private about your own self, and snitchin on others?

 

[sean69]

Dude, hurry and pay the $10.
I miss your asshole-ish/intelligently worded cynicism.

no doubt Apophis.

Just a lil "paranoid" (no pun intended @ thread) of having the BGOL "administration" privy to my personal (billing) info.

I will say that though most of the generic shit on BGOL (porn, HG, software, movies etc) is available free at citi, dafirm, etc. ... you gotta admit that BGOL has that certain brand of ... what's the word i'm looking for here ... je ne sais quoi?

 

[Top_Bunk]

When people can't relate to or haven't experienced what you are talking about they start to judge you ... regardless of who it is


Edit: And lets face it ... noone really wants to be bothered with another persons problems especially if their life is better than the person complaining

I mean but seriously how is someone supposed to respond when someone reveals that they are a stripper and dont like it, or they used drugs, or they have a father that's schizo, or a mother that's a drug addict, or they have AIDS...ETC...ETC...