Self sabotage, simple defined, are things that you do that prevent you from achieving a certain level of success. It’s a sneaky little bugger; it can come in various forms and you may not even realize it for a very long time. The problem here is without investigating the real culprit behind your lack of improvement, you are most likely to find yourself stuck in a rut. You probably eventually figure you have to live with your own unhappiness and try to find ways how to - remaining complacent in your own dissatisfaction. Taking that despair up a notch would be a lot of anger towards life, yourself, and those who seem to be doing much better
Knowledge drop from a white chick's website, amazing..........
http://www.inmyheels.com/overcoming-self-sabotage/
* Procrastination: A lot of us (read, me) know a whole lot about doing this. Delaying things that need to be done until the last possible moment and then ripping hair out if the whole “I work better under pressure” thing doesn’t work out this time around.
* Negativity: The glass is half empty. Life sucks and then you die. What’s the point? If this sounds like your dialogue on a regular basis, you are it of Sour Grapes. A pessimistic attitude gives you no incentive to strive for the goods. Like, why would it?
* Ultimate Perfection: If it isn’t perfect 100%, it was a worthless attempt and the clouds of failure engulf you…perfectly. Whether your comeback is day based (I’ll try again on Monday), task based (I will build it bigger and better and will not be imperfect like that Titanic!) or simply how you timed it (Self pity is ineffective and time consuming), you strive after the elusive title of perfection. Never mind that no one is perfect. It’s the perfect hamster-in-the-wheel effect.
* Busy for the Sake of Being Busy: It can’t be your fault if things slip through the cracks because you are multitasking multitasking tasks (no, that wasn’t a typo.) After all, important people are busy right? Stretching yourself too thin with so much to do makes it difficult to master one skill or complete one task. But.. that isn’t your fault… is it? You can think about that later - add it to your To Do list.
* Debt. Debt. Oh and More Debt: There’s the debt that had to happen (like school) and there’s the debt that happens with bad money habits and prevent you from ever getting out of that mousetrap. You want to do better - feel better about your money. And so you charge your Starbucks on the credit card you consider chucking after shopping with that same credit card to reward yourself for making such a responsible decision. Every week.
* No Real Relationships: You are elusive, cool, desirable, untouchable. You don’t do serious relationships. People have problems. You don’t get close to anyone. People can’t be trusted. You don’t go out of your way to help people. It’s every Gal for herself. Your career is your number one. Family is built in, isn’t it?
And then, you are lonely. How can this be?
* Comparing Yourself to Others: You look around to see what your peers are doing right now. Somehow, this is the indicator of where you should be in life. You’re feeling pretty ok about it - after all, you’re not ahead but you’re not behind. Good! You’re doing good and finally going strong! Yeah, until Whats-Her-Face strikes a 32 million dollar deal with some company who thinks she’s brilliant or You-Know-Who becomes an A-lister. If you didn’t have the boots to crush your own soul, take a step next to anyone worth looking at. Then you quit, because you’re not worth it after all.
* Cheating: On diets, on your significant other, on tests, on life. You’re all about the shortcuts to the Pleasure Road and can’t nobody stop you. After all, no one can detest you if they are none the wiser. This is, until you begin to detest yourself. You feel shortchanged - cheated out of the goods the life has to offer. So you find a quick fix to help you feel better about it.
* When the Good Things Don’t Count: It doesn’t matter that you single-handedly rescued 3 kittens, make the best chili in a 75 mile radius, wake up with great hair EVERY day, and that people think you’re funny. You burned dinner last night and that must mean you can’t do things correctly. Magnifying the negative things to the point it consumes all of your attention is tiresome. If all of your attention is on the things you can’t do, how can you do anything?
* Blaming Anyone Who Isn’t You: If everyone who is anyone in your life plays an active role as to why things are not going well for you, perhaps you have an accountability problem. This isn’t to say your childhood wasn’t bad, or so-and-so didn’t stab you in the back. But when does that change into taking responsibility for how your treat others? Well…it’s society’s fault that you are not well-adjusted.
* Ignorance: The red pill or the blue pill (Heh heh, a Matrix reference for those of you who didn’t know). How does not learning about money secure your finances? How does pretending cheating make you closer? How does shutting your eyes and sealing your mouth make those who do wrong make you right? Ignorance is sweet because what you don’t know can’t hurt you right? Not knowing you’re being hurt won’t lessen the final sting when you are finally given the rude awakening.
* Fail to Plan, Plan to Fail: This isn’t an attempt to stifle the free spirit. The spontaneous, happy-go-lucky ones amongst us don’t seem to be doing too badly. A little foresight doesn’t hurt to badly either. In fact, charging ahead without a plan can be a recipe for outright disaster. Going into war without a strategy? Really? How many of us cut corners on preparation and have a scar to prove it? Ever try to run a marathon with no training? Sure, you can refuse to plan if it goes against your mojo - but I hate to break it to ya. That’s you planning to fail. Darn it. When are you going to come up with a better plan?
* Never Finishing What You’ve Started: You love discovering new things in life. You try your hand at many things and that’s always the good, exciting part. It’s the quitting-’cause-you-wanna thing that can leave a tender heart or two concerned. Sooner or later, you find yourself abandoning ship because that’s your out when the going gets tough. I’d tell you more about it, but I quit.
Knowledge drop from a white chick's website, amazing..........
http://www.inmyheels.com/overcoming-self-sabotage/
